18 months ago, i decided to get myself back. i was at an all time high of 250 lbs, 5'5. i looked in the mirror and wondered who that fat person was. what had i become. i started eating healthy and doing abs daily and dropped to 187 lbs and was feeling great with another 20 to hit my goal. the past 6 months has been hectic and i've lost my way. i've put on 20 lbs and every time it seems i'm starting to do well again, some sweet jumps out and grabs me. really what happens is i go to sleep and wake up to hit the kitchen and grab something to eat. i'm semi conscious and totally disgusted with myself after i wake up enough to wonder what happened. i need a pen pal that can keep me lucid and help me drop the 20 lbs again. my boyfriend doesn't understand and while he loves me, isn't giving me the support that i need. help! tomorrow i'm going to start writing down everything to keep motivated. not sure how i'll write when i'm asleep and in the dark though. god help me : )
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