sleapydupree's diary

sleapydupree

New member
Hi, I'm new here.
I'm Ann and here are some things I'd like to share. I'm 20 years old and for the first time in my life I want to lose weight in a healthy and safe way. I've had a lot of problems for years with my ed, and I want to maintain a healthy weight instead of the drastic yo-yoing my body has gone through. At this point I am really tired of the ongoing struggle of restricting calories and binging because it is getting me nowhere. Over two years I have gained 40 lbs and I'm ready to lose it for good. Two weeks ago I decided to change my entire lifestyle, and so far I've been working out every day at the gym on campus at my school, and I've been eating healthy. What really keeps me motivated is working out and tanning.

I'm 5'2 and I currently weigh 170 lbs, and my heaviest weight has been 177. I just began this lifestyle change, but so far it has inspired me to quit smoking. I used to smoke a pack of cigarettes a day, and working out every day has definitely stopped my cravings. I began smoking when I started college, and now I'm in the middle of my third year so it feels great to not have those urges. My main goal is to reach a healthy weight, most likely around 135 lbs to begin; just so my bmi would be normal. But for short-term goals... my 21st birthday is coming up in January and my friends and I are going to celebrate together at some clubs and I really want to feel confident.

I'm excited that I found this website, and I can't wait to keep this up.
 
Welcome to the forum!

Writing down what you eat every day is a great way of tracking your progress, seeing what your doing right and wrong.

I have had a history of ED's, its really hard to break out of that mindset and start thinking healthy, its easy to slip into old ways.

Looking forward to seeing your progress!
 
So far so good, I guess. I did lose 2 lbs this week, and I feel really good that I lost them by working hard because I always had this terrible mindset that you can't lose weight if you eat. As for food I've been making some good decisions. I realized that I do have a bit of a problem.. I have a really hard time determining how much or little I should eat. I work out every day so I do try to eat a little more than usual. I eat on campus with my meal plan so I don't have a lot of choices. I really like getting wraps with chicken or the portobello pannini at the food court at school. Our cafeteria serves a lot of pasta. I'm not really sure if I should stay away from the pasta or not. Does anyone have any suggestions about the pasta? Anyway, today I bought a huge caesar salad and split it up for both lunch and dinner because it was so big two people definitely could have eaten it. Then a little bit later I had a pack of those Special K snack bites that are kind of like shredded wheat cereal.

I went to the gym twice yesterday and once today. I was glad to get a full hour in yesterday. I usually just do the ellipticals, bikes, and treadmill. Although, yesterday I had the chance to lift a little. I just did my arms and chest.

Everything is working out fine so far. I went out last night and had two beers... so I feel kind of guilty, but I guess it could have been worse. I'm getting together with some friends tonight so the pressure will be on.
 
Hi and Welcome

Starting your diary is a great i found it has helped me sooooo much people popping in and giving advice and encouragment

CONGRATS on the 2lb loss this week!!!!

As for the pasta i think it would depend how its cooked what its with there are so many hidden cals so maybe just ask
I always eat until I begin to feel full I have heard that it takes a while for the brain for register your full and by that time I have eaten way too much and cant move.

Oh and dont feel guilt about havig a beer every now and again its just about making the better options eg instead of beer vodka and diet coke, asking for salads with no dressings its something i am just starting to realise dont deprive yourself from anything or you will want it so much more

Take Care
Sarah
 
Yeah, I definitely decided to shy away from the pasta. I've been doing my usual workout, but I haven't posted in a couple days thanks to campus internet being lame and not working for 24 hours. I've been going to the gym and eating salads...

Today for lunch I had:
salad with crab & shrimp
white turkey on whole wheat

and for dinner, I had:
baked chicken
steamed vegetables (some were like brown and unrecognizable)
small side salad

It was burger night at the cafeteria so I definitely chose the horrible, rubbery chicken and brown veggies! yay! They were surprisingly good. They only put effort into making one good meal a day.. like lunch was really good. Dinner was only acceptable. I hate having to rely on a cafeteria to eat every day. I do have a full kitchen in my apartment, but I don't have a job so all of my meals are prepaid thanks to mom.

On a more serious note:
I'm really surprised that I haven't crawled into bed and refused to get out. The boy and I are pretty much through after the second 3 months we tried this. I might be a little bitter, but I was the one that finished it. He's going to school to be a personal trainer and is really really hot... which makes me a little self-conscious?? Maybe just a bit. Oh well, we tried this last year and it didn't work so why am I not surprised it didn't work this time? I actually had more motivation to go to the gym because it was actually a giant relief; I'd rather focus on bettering myself than him.
 
Thanks! I'm so glad I quit smoking, and seriously exercising is the only thing that keeps me from doing it. I had some trouble today... all I wanted was a cigarette, but I think tomorrow is the great american smokeout so I made myself ignore the cravings and exercise more. I went to the gym twice. Once for an hour around 11:30 this morning after my classes. Then I went back after dinner around 7 because I was craving a cigarette and I almost bought some on my way back to my apt from dinner.

Speaking of dinner... this is what I had to eat today!
For lunch:
A pickle spear haha (they give us those with our meals at the food court)
Chicken wrap with honey mustard
(So I always crave the buffalo popcorn chicken with ranch, but i make myself get the honey mustard because I think the HM is light).. it's still good though

For Dinner:
Tuna Salad

I wasn't that hungry for dinner because the wraps are really big. I sometimes like to save half for later because I can't eat it all. But I definitely ate it all today because I was starving after working out for an hour and I do not eat breakfast. ever. I have this weird sort-of morning sickness that I've had since I was a kid and I just can't eat in the morning or I will get sick. I'm not pregnant, but I might look pregnant. I took some before pictures a couple days ago, and I'm just working up the nerve to post them. I definitely look like I'd be ending my second trimester though if I was pregnant. ugh!

I don't mean to type out a whole story, but this reminds me of this one time my weight really embarrassed me, and I think that reminding myself that this happened will help motivate me... last year, I was about the same size that I am now give or take a couple lbs and I was at an interview at Burger King for a part-time after school job. During the interview, the manager was like, "I'd love to help you out. When are you expecting!?". And I just sat there looking confused and replied, "Expecting what? ohhhhh..." Awkward moment.
 
Awkward moments are awesome.

Breakfast really is the most important meal of the day! Even if it is a little thing, like a cereal bar, it eating it may benifit you greatly! I know it is ultimently calories in and caloires out, which you seem to have no problem doing, buy maybe consider eating it?
 
I know I should eat breakfast... it would probably give me more energy in the morning, but I have really early classes and I'm always running out the door.

So today, I did not work out. I've been really busy running around campus doing stuff though. Then I came back and needed to study for this horrible exam I have tomorrow, but the boy came over and we "officially" ended things so it took up hours upon hours of talking. Physical relationships suck... that's a lesson learned. We never really were together; we were just friends with benefits that were working on a relationship that never got there because our hormones always got in the way. I feel ok though.. it's not keeping me from doing the things I need to do. Anyway, this is a weight-loss blog not a relationship blog so this is what I ate today...

turkey sandwich
vegetable soup
I didn't have the chance to eat anything but lunch today, but it's ok I'll try to grab something on campus before class in the morning.

I'm going to weigh-in in the morning. Saturday is usually my weigh-in day but I'll be at my best friends house this weekend. I'm excited to see what I lost because I can really tell in my face that I have lost weight unless it's just from my tan. grrr.
 
So it wasn't just me because... I lost 5 lbs this week!!! I knew I looked a little different. I really didn't think I was going to lose that much. That is the most weight I've ever lost by real exercise and eating. For some reason I was never able to associate real weight loss with eating. I'd exercise and not eat, and I knew I was hurting myself but I always thought food was just so bad. Then I'd go on a binge out of depression because I was depriving myself of food which would lead to gaining back more weight. I weighed myself before class this morning as soon as I woke up and I starting crying. I've only been on here a week, but I find this place so motivating. And I'm eating breakfast right now. I got a bagel at the coffee shop this morning to bring back to my room. Since I'm going to see my best friend this weekend we always go to this fancy chinese restaurant in her artsy little hometown so I'm going to let myself have whatever I want. I'm mostly excited for some california rolls. I'm making sure I go to the gym before I leave though. I'm so excited for a weekend of good friends and shopping in cute little boutiques.

Most of the time when I end things with guys I really care about I go into this depression where I don't care about my appearance, and I skip class and just cry in bed. I feel so motivated to do everything right now. Sure, I might seem happy, but I'm really really sad.. I'm just not letting that interfere with what needs to be done like I've said before. Have a good weekend because I'm going to have the best weekend!
 
So I haven't written in here for about 10 months... wow that's a long time. I could have had a baby in that amount of time, but I did not. I did gain about 30 lbs through a long process of slipping back into hold habits and not caring though. Well, I'm caring now. I've lost 7 lbs so far this week. I've never lost that much at one time, but I'm eating right and not going overboard on my workouts. I'm embracing the major loss. The most weight I've ever been able to lose in a week is 3 lbs so I'm impressed and amazed. I'm not just losing weight because I can definitely tell I'm building some nice muscles. I'm excited to have definition back in my arms. I wasn't quite at the point of "cottage cheese" arms, (I've always been somewhat muscular; big, but muscular), but I knew that day was coming soon if I didn't get back into the grind. Sorry if I offended anyone by that remark, I really didn't mean to.

I'm not really going to keep track of what I eat in here, because I know I'm doing fine. My mom is keeping track of my calories. I'm 21 and my mommy is doing it for me... just kidding. She wants to help me reach my goal before I go back to college in September, and she's an excellent cook, and buys the groceries in the house so I trust her. Besides, I just eat what she gives me because I'm at the point where I'm so "over food". I just can't enjoy over-eating anymore. I did have some salmon for dinner tonight.

All is well.
 
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