Reaching For the Dreams....

It's official! Vel gets the keys tomorrow, and signs the contract! Moving starts around 10:00AM. I'm so excited! But, I started C.E today... and it sucks. 3 hours of doing practically nothing...bleagh... oh well, I signed up for it, I might as well suffer through it and get it done.

Breakfast: cereal
Lunch: little fat free bean burritos with cheese. And too many of the little ones.
Snacks througout the day: 3 granola bars

I'm not hungry, so I'm not going to eat dinner. Maybe have a yogurt or something, but I'm not hungry.
 
Ok, so I haven't been around because of the move. and we're done. we got the last of the stuff out yesterday, and everything is now at the new place. Amen. :D

I spent the night the first night there the first night with the horses(sat-sun), and was there for a total of 5 days in a row. I've been working so hard, but eating so badly...(suzette brings fast food and pop drinks for the workers, and I drank most of the water the first day) But, I haven't gained any... i'm still stuck at 193...*sigh* I really need to get back in gear. I thought that once the stress of school was over I'd have no problem getting back on the wagon...but it seems that the wagon team got spooked and took off without me, so i'm stuck walking after them until I catch up. And who knows how long that will be...

I'll try my hardest to catch the wagon, and I really do want to. It's just such a long way...Well, I do have volleyball today, so that should help out a little bit at least
 
You can do it Xorie, start packing a lunch, bring a little cooler, keep guzzling that water. It sounds like you're working incredibly hard so I hope you give your body what it needs :) I have faith in you girl!
 
ok. It's independence day. AKA, getbackontrackday. It's a beautiful day out, so I think it will be a great day to fix my eating habits again. Have a great 4th everyone who celebrates it!
 
j/k. TODAY is the day.

Yesterday, after the craziness of getting the horses settled down, and having Sonny getting sick, I kinda just started munching... not good.

And today I had 2 bowls of cereal for breakfast... aka, bad. so, i'll have something small, like a yogurt when I get hungry for lunch. I get to work at the daycare today, because I have a job now, officially, so i get to run around with about 12 crazy little kiddies... oh what joy...:D Then tomorrow is horses day, and i'm still in school... and just...ugh. i'm so tired, I want to binge, but I can't, I need to run, but I don't have time, and I need to write a reflective letter about myself by tomorrow, and I have about 1 page of random thoughts jumbled together in no particular order. It frustrates me that I can't write my letter, because I normally have absolutely no problem writing, be it a story, or an essay. But this stupid letter about myself and my goals in life is driving me up a wall!! :mad: I'm getting stressed out, so I'm not sleeping the best... which reminds me... i had the strangest dream the other night....anyway, I've just been eating crap, I'm still going to be the same weight as I was when I left school for the summer, and no ones going to get that "who is that" reaction like i wanted...


*sigh*

I know, I'm being really pessimistic, but I need to get this all out of my system as soon as I can. maybe by dumping it here, It will make me feel better and be able pull myself back off of the ground that I was knocked down on to.


oh, and my "bestfriendwhonowignoresmecompletelyandnownolongerissaidbestfriend" still hasn't returned any of my calls. So, that brings down my number of friend friends to just, lemme see, 1? I don't know, maybe I prefer it that way and so dont let myself close to anyone. Sometimes my lack of friends to confide in makes me want to weep alone in my room, but my pride won't let me do that either, so i'm stuck here with all these emotions bouncing around inside with no way to get out. Maybe that too is another reason why i can't seem to stop myself from eating. i've already known that i'm an emotional eater, so maybe this bit of self doubt is not helping anything.

Anyway, sorry for dumping all that, I don't know if I feel better now, or maybe I will later. We'll just have to see.
 
...omg...

I start riding lessons on monday! eek! :D I'm soooo excited! you have no idea. And this has made me really jump back into getting in shape. riding requires a good physical condition in order to do it well, and I want to do it well.

Breakfast: 1 bowl of cereal. Also, i'm probably going to go running tonight. It's too hot to do it now, so as soon as it starts to cool off, i will go, probably going to bring my lil sis with me too.
 
Hey Jacqui, I'm so excited to hear about the riding lessons, you know I've always wanted them as well ;) make sure you tell us all about it ok? I don't mind only having a few friends, because the ones I do have mean the world to me, it will be ok :hug2: You're a great girl.
 
ack! I had my first riding lesson today! I was only on Charles for about 20ish min, but man oh man, my abs and but and legs are sore. :D makes me feel good though! plus, it makes me really really really want to get in shape again, as I could only buy paddock boots rather than the high ones because of my monster calves. BUT, I've always had big calves, and there isn't a lot of fat on my calves, they are just really muscle-y. *sigh* oh well. I do like my boots though... even though they cost $70...

Breakfast: 1.5 bowls of raisen bran
Lunch: banana w/ peanut butter
Dinner: turkey sandwich w/cheese
snack: banana w/ peanut butter


gonna do some leg exercises and some ab and arm work today. My mini goal is to drop 3 lbs by my next lesson. I'll make that my really mini goal. 3lbs by each lesson. Should be fun!
 
well, i've controlled myself today!

so far at least...

Breakfast: 1 bowl of honey bunches of oats.

and oh are my inner legs sore... :D makes me feel good though.
 
Hey I'm super jealous about your lessons ;) I can just imagine how fun it must be. I know it's hard work though. I desperately want a pair of riding boots this winter, for nothing other than looking good! So sexy :)
 
lukewarm said:
Hey I'm super jealous about your lessons ;) I can just imagine how fun it must be. I know it's hard work though. I desperately want a pair of riding boots this winter, for nothing other than looking good! So sexy :)
Click to expand...

Like these? :)

I can't wait until Monday, when I have my next lesson! woot woot for me! :D


Other than that, I stayed up last night and went to the midnight showing of Harry Potter...

:mad: made me mad. I didn't like it very much at all, though it was better than the others...*sigh* what a waste of $9.50 and only getting 3 1/2 hours of sleep last night. oh well.

Breakfast: 1 bowl of cinnamon frosted mini wheats
 
I've never seen a Harry Potter movie, or read the books. I love fantasy stuff as well, I don't know why I've never gotten into it. Anyways, yes those boots are great! Hope you had a beautiful day Jacqui ;)
 
Well... it's been a while since I've gotten on and written. Probably because i've been ashamed... I gained 10lbs back! I was up to 198! EEEEEKKK!!

but, now I'm glad to say that i'm back down to 194. The lessons give me focus again.

And i'm going in for torture today. Here's my schedule... school, jump training (1 hour of jumping torture) then volleyball practice, then voice and piano lessons! *dies* I hate tuesdays. Then wednesday and thursday I work at a daycare... I do believe that the only way I'll ever have kids is if they go home at the end of the day. :D But then again, it might be different if there's only 1or 2 of them, rather than 12! :D
 
Jump training? Oh, that was hell. I didn't even make it through the whole thing... In fact, right at the end, with one more set of jumping up a huge flight of stairs left, I puked... 5 times... that was NOT fun. i've never done that before, so it was a day for firsts.

But I'm so sore today it's not even real. I can barely move, and at the moment, i'm contemplating not going to work (at a daycare, chasing a bunch of kiddies around) and just going home and doing absolutely nothing... which by the way, sounds REALLY good. I haven't had a day off in..forever it seems like. I just keep pushing myself, and doing so many things it's rather rediculus. (sp?)

Anyway...

Breakfast: 1.5 bowls of apple jacks. At least I managed to stop myself from eating two bowls this morning... but i was HUNGRY! :D
 
maleficent said:
jump training? good lord that sounds killer...

you're awesome!!
Click to expand...

Oh it was killer. A lot of rising on the toes, lunges, tuck jumps, scissors jumps, reverse jumps, lunges with a jump, jumping up stairs, doing lunges with medicine balls, then some ab workouts, and of course, jumping up stairs...what fun... :D
 
That's ok. I went with my sister...she's annoyingly skinny and naturally atheletic even after doing NOTHING all summer. She was like a flipping frog jumping up those steps! I had to go slow, not very gracefully, and never made it all the way to the top once.... oh, and I couldn't do the sit-ups... I'm just too damn top heavy... it made me so frustrated that I couldn't do it, that I was close to tearing up...:rolleyes: oh well... I'll just have to work on those, because I don't want to be fat fat my senior year in highschool...
 
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