(Re)new Journey

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Kakes2

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Hey everyone! I am somewhat new to this forum in that I used to come around here about 2 years ago, but I fell off the wagon after some setbacks. The good news is that I am back and I am excited to say that I am more than two week into my new journey. I am VERY short, about 4 foot 10 inches and I currently weigh about 167. Thats about 3 pounds down in the last few weeks. A year ago at this time, I weighed about 184 so I am feeling hopeful and encouraged at this starting point of 167.

I am not one to look up statistics and unrealistic numbers of what weight I am "supposed" to be. I simply want to feel comfortable in my own skin and at this point, I certainly DO NOT feel comfortable at all. I don't like the way I look in pictures. I can't move around the way I want to. I am embarrassed by the pool or at the beach, and I simply do not like the way I look. My goal is to feel confident and comfortable.

My regimen so far seems to be working for me. As of now, I LOVE the gym. I'm hoping that doesn't change. I have recently started to like running. Two weeks ago, I could barely run a quarter mile at a time. Over the last few weeks, I have built up to running a whole mile, walking a quarter, then running another three-quarters (2 miles total). That is a HUGE victory for me! I also like to take Step classes at my gym, do some rowing on the machine, and some light weights (mostly because I have no idea what to do with weights!). I've also walked to my gym (about 2.5 miles round trip) when the weather has been nice. I am living by my Fitbit to hold me accountable to just keep myself moving. It has been a great tool so far.

As far as food goes, I have made some major changes. I was heavy into take-out and fast-food. I won't even mention how many times a week I would find myself eating that crap. I also would buy whatever junk food I wanted and wouldn't think twice about eating it. I would also binge eat, going mostly all day without eating and then eating a hefty amount. I have since cut out all the take out and fast food. I haven't eaten any (with the exception of going out to eat for a special occasion). I also have had very limited junk (I am addicted to chocolate so that's been hard). I have also made sure to eat breakfast every morning (smoothie, eggs, fruit, yogurt, etc.). I am eating a good amount of chicken as I could probably eat it at every meal and not get bored of it. Hoping to get more adventurous when it comes to cooking, but so far I think I've made some great changes. I've also been trying to eat more small meals throughout the day and that's been an adjustment. Oh, also NO MORE SODA!

So that's me in a nutshell. I think I am off to a great start. I am trying to not live by my scale and just trust the process. I am hoping to talk to some people on here about their journeys to gain some insight. Please feel free to comment/ask questions/etc.!
 
Hi Kakes & welcome back. It sounds to me like you are off to a great start. No junk food & no sodas? What could be wrong with that?
 
Gosh, you've made so many great changes! That's a lot of positive habits you're building, it sounds like you're well on your way to being comfortable and happy.
 
Thank you Cate and Oaks. I feel great about the changes that I've made so far.

One question for anyone to "weigh in" on (pun intended)... How often do you weigh yourself? I have a scale at home and will weigh myself whenever I feel inclined but I almost think it's messing with me a little bit since it varies so much during the day/between days. I have seen a lot of people on the internet who have a weekly weigh in day (every Thursday, for example) and I'm wondering if that works for other people. I know the best answer is "whatever works for you" but I'm curious as to what others find works for them and why.

I forgot to mention in my original post that I also cut out coffee (along with soda). I am a cream and sugar Dunkin coffee drinker so that simply had to stop. I actually don't even miss it at all. Feeling great about simplifying my beverage intake to water only, with an occasional social drink or two. I'm hoping to see and feel the impact of that!

Today I was not feeling well so I took a short nap, which I never do. That didn't seem to help much so I got up and made myself a salad. I think that was exactly what I needed so I ended up getting to the gym and running 1 mile, walking a quarter, then running another three-quarters. As I alluded to in my original post, running for me is a STRUGGLE. I have to convince myself not to give up after every step. It's a mental thing for me and I am so proud of what I've been able to accomplish in just a few short weeks. I felt a little guilty that all I did tonight at the gym was the treadmill and stretch, and then I headed home. But, I gave myself a reality check and realized that even a 2 mile run was better than no run at all!

Feeling good today and I hope everyone else is too!
 
I think weighing in once, maybe twice a week is right for me. It can be very disheartening to weigh any more than that as my weight really fluctuates.
A 2-mile run is nothing to feel guilty about! I'm glad you gave yourself a reality check :D
 
Thanks for your input Cate. I am very high anxiety and working on self control (aren't we all) so I think it will be difficult for me to put away the scale and only take it out once or twice a week... But I'm willing to give it a try.

So far this week, I've had my ups and downs. I've made it to the gym every day since Sunday (so 6 days in a row). I was feeling kind of "blah" midweek this week so I'm happy to report that I was able to get past it and keep myself on track. I am also finding some ways of adding a bit of extra exercise into my life, i.e. walking to and from the gym. Great way to enjoy the (finally) decent New England weather.

A small victory I had this week was when a coworker gave me four chocolate chip cookies, I politely accepted them but then I gave them away to someone else. In the past, I have just eaten the cookies. And to be honest, they aren't really that good haha! I am proud of myself for not taking them. That is not to say that I haven't had a cookie or two this week, but these cookies would have been "extra" that I simply do not need.

Going into the weekend and into next week, I am slightly concerned about snacking since I am on April vacation (I am a teacher). I think I will have to stick to my normal routine of getting myself to the gym and just be really diligent about also sticking to my healthier meal choices. I think it will be difficult but I am up for the challenge. I feel like I have a good handle on the exercise. Food, on the other hand, is a bit of a guessing game for me. May have to do some research over vacation.

Happy Friday!
 
Rough start this morning as I slept in until around 10am and then had a difficult time getting going. Decided to put on my gym clothes and hit the pavement. I walked 6 miles and it was great. The weather was beautiful, about 55 degrees, and the sun was shining. I am so happy that I decided to skip the gym and get some exercise outside today. I also had been to the gym for the last 6 days so I needed a change of scenery.

This morning I had 2 scrambled eggs (made with almond milk) for breakfast and then some grilled chicken and carrots for lunch. Then I had one chocolate chip cookie. I used to basically eat take out all weekend long so I am happy and feeling great about eating at home.
 
It sounds like a good Saturday to me kakes. Eating at home is much better for you & getting outdoors instead of the gym is also a win. Enjoy the rest of your weekend xo
 
Thanks Cate!

Last night I was thinking back to about 2 years ago and remembered a time when I saw "157" on my scale (pounds). I snapped the picture of the numbers and texted it to my friend because I was so proud to finally see a number like that. I suddenly remembered that at that time, I was doing a lot of the same things I am doing now with my healthy choices and exercise. However, I had forgotten that I was doing bikram yoga. So, last night I jumped on my phone and researched some bikram yoga places around me, and like a true miracle, there was actually a Groupon for a place that looked very promising. I snatched up the Groupon, took a look at the Sunday schedule, and BAM! Found myself at bikram at 10 this morning. Now I am usually one to sleep in whenever I am given the chance, i.e. yesterday :), but I made sure to get myself out of bed and to yoga. Man, am I glad that I did. It was a struggle the entire 90 minutes. For those who aren't familiar, bikram is hot yoga, the room is kept at about 105 degrees fahrenheit!

I am so excited to add this into my exercise routine because it will help to mix up my workouts. It is an entirely different workout than my other go-tos (running on the treadmill, long walks, or Step class), but it is exercise nonetheless. I bought a month unlimited pass and the recommendation is to try and go 10 times within that first month. Looking ahead to this week, I have a lot of flexibility within my schedule since I am off of work for the week, but it'll be interesting to see how I fit it into my work schedule next week. It is important for me to have options with my exercise so I don't get bored, and neither does my body.

So after the yoga class, I weighed myself (I probably should have someone at my house hide my scale) and it read 164.8! I'm sure the drop of about a pound in the last few days is due to the water weight I sweat out at yoga, but I will take the small victory. I am also tempted to go to the gym tonight but I think my body needs a rest. Even now, I've come home and showered and have very little energy to do anything around the house. Might need to relax for 30 minutes or so before I get going. I've exercised for the last 8 days straight. Good meal choices for the rest of the day today (heading to the grocery story in a bit) and looking forward to a hike with a friend tomorrow.

Hope everyone is enjoying their weekend!
 
Hi kakes. I had to look up Groupon as I had never heard of it. Your exercise schedule sounds exhausting. Don't forget about having a balance xo
 
Hi Cate. I agree with you about the exhaustion, to a certain extent. I am relatively young, 27 so I think I should be active. I also was very active in my younger years so I don't think it's too much for me at this point. I love the challenge. However, I do think it's important for me to not burn myself out. I will be sure to take days off when needed and get plenty of rest. I also feel that if I put in my best effort on the days when I can, I won't feel so bad about days when I can't exercise.
 
Been a good few days on the fitness front. Sunday, bikram yoga (90 min in 105 degrees!). Monday I went for a 5.15 mile hike with a friend in the morning, then in the evening I was bored so I went to Step class. Today (Tuesday) I took it easy during the day since my body needed some rest, and I made it to bikram this evening. Felt great to get my body moving and I also did better today that I did on Sunday.

Food this week has been pretty good. Sunday my schedule was off a bit since I had bikram in the morning and you aren't supposed to eat a heavy meal before you go but managed to stay on track. Monday I used my crockpot to make a BBQ pulled chicken. Not sure about how healthy it is since it has the BBQ sauce but I didn't add any extra brown sugar or anything despite the recipe calling for it. I also put it on a tortilla, sprinkled some cheese on it and put it under the broiler. I am scared of the carbs but I can't cut those out of my diet completely. Just trying to eat them on a VERY limited basis. I made sure to keep the portions small so I wasn't overdoing it. Today I had a small portion of the chicken for lunch, along with some veggies. Dinner was a turkey burger with tomato and broccoli on the side. Wondering if there's a healthier way to make the pulled chicken. Perhaps making the pulled chicken plain and then adding a bit of BBQ sauce afterward so it's not swimming in the sauce?

Tomorrow I am going out to lunch with a family member so I am hoping to make good choices. First thing, no soda or bread, as tough as it might be. If I do end up getting something that not so healthy, portion control needs to be my saving grace!

Last thing to note, the scale read 164.2 today. I am quite happy with that number. However, the scale is moving a bit slower than the last time I was on this journey. Started at about 170 at the beginning of April so that's about 6 pounds in less than 3 weeks. That's okay though, I am in this for the long haul. Going to continue with what I am doing and trust the process. I am hoping to be in the 150s (below 160) by the beginning part of May. So in about 2 weeks, I'd like to lose another 4. We shall see!

Oh! And I am now down 20 pounds from the 184 that I weighed last year at this time! Yay!
 
Feeling kind of crappy today after eating out. I had a meatball sandwich, actually only half since it was HUGE. I sort of regret eating it and wasn't feeling so well afterward anyway. I took the other half home but I gave it away to someone so that I won't end up eating it. Kind of made me sad because I spent money on it and it tastes good but my health is more important. I also am working so hard at the gym and at yoga and I don't want to ruin it.

On a sidenote, it is REALLY tough to go out to eat. It is such a social thing that can't be avoided. I also struggle with it because there is always an option to get a salad, but I think it is sort of dumb to spend $13 on a salad when I could just as well make my own at home. Then I could also go for a healthier option but then I tend to think, "one meal out won't hurt me." Such a struggle! It is not completely unavoidable but I just need to remember to keep the eating out to a minimum. I must say, I am eating out a whole lot less than I used to and for that I am very happy.

After my lunch today, I came home and took about a mile walk with my dog. Heading to the gym now to hopefully get in some running before step class tonight. I haven't been able to run on the treadmill in quite a few days since I have been walking outside, doing bikram, and step class instead so I am interested to see if I am able to do my (almost) 2 mile run tonight. I think for me it is a "mind over matter" thing so if I can pump myself up, I just may be able to do it.

Lastly, I have gotten two compliments in the past few days that have given me motivation. My mom asked me how much weight I've lost and when I told her "five" she said it looked like more than that. Then today my sister said that it looked like I had lost some weight and my grandmother agreed. I am hoping to get more of those compliments along my journey to help keep me motivated. I don't care too much about what other people think, but it is always nice to get a compliment, no matter what it is!
 
Thursday I knew I had an commitment during the day for a few hours so I made sure to get myself to the gym in the morning. I hopped on the treadmill and was struggling pretty hard. I ran a mile, then alternated walking and running quarters for the second mile. I could tell my body was tired! I did 15 minutes on the rowing machine, did some stretching, and a few weights. Still kind of clueless on what to do with weights so I tend to mimic other people around me. :)

Today I went to bikram at 10am. I really had to push myself to get there as I was really close to just staying home and relaxing. BUT... I made it there and I am so glad I went. One of my friends teases me that I often complain about not wanting to work out but then afterwards I always say how amazing it feels. That feeling keeps me motivated. After I was done with everything for the day and home, I didn't want to waste the beautiful weather we were having so I went for a 4.75 mile walk. It was gorgeous out and I am so glad I went. I love walking outside because I just keep walking and then have no choice but to walk back! I also live in a great area where I can mix up my paths and keep it from getting boring.

On the food front, I think I am doing fairly well with my food choices. I am getting slightly worried that I will get bored with eating the same foods so I am definitely going to need to find some new recipes. I am apprehensive about doing that, however, because the more ingredients, the more calories! I am sticking mostly to chicken, eggs, veggies, fruits, and limiting dairy and carbs as best I can. Seems to be working for me currently.

A few small victories yesterday when I went out to eat with my family. For one, I ordered water. I used to be a soda lover but not anymore. I think it's been about a month with no soda and I don't miss it at all. Secondly, they offer this delicious bread at the restaurant we were at. Well, I didn't eat any. I do think I got some "judgment" from a family member that I was a little bit crazy for trying to be healthy but I just brushed it off. I took the attitude (in my head) that I will have the last laugh when I am in shape and feeling good. And lastly, I ordered a salad for lunch :) Unlike the last time I went out to eat (when I ate a meatball sandwich) I didn't feel like I had a lead balloon in my stomach afterward!

For this weekend, I have another family commitment tomorrow that will end in a banquet-type meal. My goal is to limit myself on portions and try to pick the healthier choices that are offered. I also want to make it to bikram one time this weekend and then either walk or hit the gym the other day. Monday is back to work for me, after having this week off so I am slightly nervous about getting back into that routine. Will take more meal planning and prep and more of an effort to get to the gym after working... but I can do it!
 
Small victories are sweet kakes. I think you are doing well. You can do it indeed :)
 
Thanks so much Cate! Your encouragement means a lot.

This morning I had a family event which ended at a banquet-style meal. As I said yesterday ^^ my goal was to have small portions and try to choose the healthier options. I am happy to say that I did a great job with that. I had a small portion of salad, 3 small meatballs, a small piece of roasted chicken (but I'm sure it was cooked with lots of butter and things!), and a brownie. I could have easily chosen the mayo-filled potato salad or the pasta with sauce as well, but I managed to stay away from those. I also made sure to have only one dessert. And lastly, a family member poured me a small glass of lemonade and I took two sips of it and chose water instead. Unlike times in the past when I have eaten out, I do not have that disgustingly gross feeling of being full. And I like it!

For today, I need some rest and relaxation for a little while then I am planning to hit the gym. The weather is crumby today so it makes me just want to be a couch potato... but I'm not going to let that happen! Need to keep myself moving.
 
Thanks Cate! That feeling after over eating is the worst and I'm trying to never have that feeling again. Even though I am eating MUCH healthier for my body, I still feel "heavy" after eating. Trying to think of that feeling as necessary to refuel my body.

On a sidenote, I'm worried that I am not eating enough since I am going to bed hungry most nights. I try to eat dinner around 6pm or so and I have a meal that is satisfying in terms of how full it makes me feel. I am eating just until I feel full. Unfortunately that leaves me hungry around 9 or 10pm. Not much of a problem but it has me questioning if I'm eating enough. If absolutely necessary, I will have an after-dinner snack of fruit or carrots to curb the hunger. I have not (and will not) give into eating junk... especially that late at night. Last night, for example, I had a turkey burger (no bun) and a cup of raw broccoli with a sprinkle of mozzarella cheese and lite balsamic dressing. It was plenty to make me feel satisfied but a few hours later I was hungry.

Yesterday I dragged myself to the gym with the intent of running two straight miles. After getting on the treadmill, I realized that goal was a tad ambitious for that day. I ended up running a mile and a half straight (no stopping), then I walked a quarter mile, then ran the last quarter. Still very good for me! I am not a runner, but I'd like to become one! I then did some stretching and some ab work. I NEVER do any ab exercises because I feel like my abs are too buried to make a difference. I also feel like I do all the exercises wrong. Well, time to let that go. I did a few exercises and they hurt, so I must be doing them right :) After that, I did 10 minutes on the stair stepper (wow, what a good workout that is!) and then a little work with free weights. Overall a great workout for a late Saturday afternoon.

This morning the scale read 163.3 and I am thrilled!!! The scale has been stuck in the 164s (and a few times in 165) for a week or so, so I'm happy to see it has budged. Hoping to keep it in the 163 range and never see 164 ever again. My goal is to see the 150s by the beginning part of May. I think I am on track to accomplishing that if I keep at this pace.

Now I am headed to bikram yoga which seems a bit like torture on a Sunday morning. I love the feeling of it afterward, but before and during, I wonder why I pay money to do it hahaha. For real though, it is great for both my body and my mind, so I love the challenge. It is similar to running for me in that I have to convince myself that I can do it... a mind over matter thing for sure!
 
Thanks Cate! Bikram was good today. I enjoyed the instructor today much more than the one I had the other day. This instructor made the class more enjoyable. It was a great way to start my day.

This week is back to work for me after a week off. My goal is to eat breakfast every day and stick to making healthy choices for my meals. I also want to make it to the gym or bikram every day this week (unless I have a VERY good reason to skip). I'm thinking step class Monday and Wednesday nights, bikram Tuesday and Friday, and regular gym workout on Thursday and Saturday. Certainly that plan could change but it's helpful for me to have an idea of what my week looks like. The good thing is that I enjoy all of these types of exercise and am looking forward to them. Here's to hoping that optimism doesn't change!
 
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