Pacoltmaki's Weight Loss Diary

Pacoltmaki

Pacoltmaki

(Pac)
Hi All! I've just registered to the forum, something I've never done before, hoping to get ideas and motivation for my journey.
I've always struggled with my weight, like so many here but in a nutshell: reached my highest weight at around 17, did a very successful diet/exercice combo and reached my lowest weight ever. Through the years I gained some kgs, lost some, but remained between 60 and 70kgs to my 165cm. Then I had my children. 3 of them. After the 3rd I reached an alarming 78kgs, tried all sorts of diets with no success until in 2015 I found the switch in my head and through hard work at the gym and sensible dieting, I turned to the most toned and slim I have ever been. Then again years passed and until 3 years ago I was ok, if not especially satisfied with how I looked. But then (age, hormones, depression) moving countries, I gained about 15kgs, which apart from the pregnancies, never happened.
During these 3 years I was trying to find that switch that I had in 2015, failing every single day, restarting every single morning, hating myself for being so weak.
Summer of 2020 and a photo. I was shocked how I looked. So after years of living without a scale, I stepped on one and cried. 78kg, with no pregnancies, just like that. And finally it did it. After the summer holiday I started to make all sorts of changes. I told myself not to dispair, whatever happens. Tried IF, but ate twice as much for fear of being hungry in the no food period. Anyway. September came and I (an absolute carb-person who loves cookies and chocolate and sweets) made a drastic decision and cut all processed food and white flour and sugar from my life. Just like that, from one day to another. Since September I have not had a bite of bread, sugary anything, pasta, chocolate or anything of the sort. And for the first time in my life it doesn't feel like a diet. It finally is a life style, with no cravings whatsoever. Never once. I found very good alternatives for sweets (fruits or protein balls) and I am very happy with progress. Today a new scale arrives. I can't wait to see what it will show after 2 months. I am on the right track and never want to go back to sugar/processed/white flour based nutrition. I will record my weight as soon as the scale arrives! :)
 
I tried to be short in the first thread, left out some quite essential things like goals and timeframe
So my goal is to put on a bathing suit in the summer 2021 and to be able to go swimming with my children with no shame instead of secretly crying dressed in black from head to toe in the shade of a tree while watching all sorts of peolple walk around in bikinis/bathing suits.
I'm 42 with 3 children, and I know that the above is ridiculous. But that's my goal for now. Kg-wise I want to go under 60. I suppose that the changes I have made in my eating habits will result in a slow loss of body fat. I just have to be patient. It took more than 3 years to gain all of it, so patience, patience.
 
Hi pacoltmakis, & welcome to the forum (it's early morning here in Australia). I hope your new scales reflect all the positive changes you have made in the last couple of months. I bet you feel much better for them.
 
Cate said:
Hi pacoltmakis, & welcome to the forum (it's early morning here in Australia). I hope your new scales reflect all the positive changes you have made in the last couple of months. I bet you feel much better for them.
Click to expand...
Hi Cate, thank you! :) The scales are set up, age, height etc, waiting for me to step on. I resisted and will wait until morning (it's evening time in Germany) to see all the measurements it offers. Trying not to have too high hopes. :)
 
Good idea waiting until the morning. I hate the scales. No matter what they say you have made very healthy changes :)
 
Cate said:
Good idea waiting until the morning. I hate the scales. No matter what they say you have made very healthy changes :)
Click to expand...
Thank you! Reading diaries and posts on this forum, it seemed like a very supportive environment and voilà, it is! Thank you for that!
I agree about scales they are dangerous and addictive. There was a time when I stepped on them every 15 mins...
Off to sleep (also part of the changes, I try to sleep more than before). Have a great day ahead!
 
So, although I said that I was not gonna have high hopes, it seems I did have higher ones than I should have. I declare the scales ny absolute ennemy who is able to crush my soul in a second after 2 months of feeling good with my progress.
Scales showed 77 kg. That is 1 kg less than what I measured in the summer. I do look different (much), so my guess is that I weighed much more then. Either way, I'm devastated.
Trying to tell myself it's ok, but it doesn't work.
On the other hand it will push me. I will add IF from today, I have this running app that I used before and I'm getting a bar for my weights to do strength training as well.
Just writing it down, I already feel better and stopped crying.
 
:grouphug: I'm sorry the scales were so unkind this morning! You're probably right about your original weight having been more than you thought. Either way if you're feeling better and looking better you're doing something right.
 
Thank you! I was (am) so proud of myself while packing lunches with everything I don't allow myself, or cooking dinner for the children without the need of forcing myself not to, I just don't eat those things.
Scales are evil :mad:.
 
Food log Day 1:

Starting the day with 3 capucchinos (long black coffee with milk froth no sugar) - I probably should cut this, the milk is full fat and about 1 dl for the 3 cappuccinos all together. But this is the last of my bad habits, and I need the 1st one that I always take with me at 6am to take my dog for a walk. I'm the lady with a steaming coffee mug at 6:05am with her dog.

Breakfast: 2 slices of ryebread with thin layer of butter and half slice of cheese + small can of tuna

Plan for lunch: egg burger - 2 fried eggs instead of the buns, salad ham avocado and tomato as filling. Looking forward to it!
 
1 dl of whole milk has ~65 kcal. Skim has 47 kcal. You have to decide for yourself if it's worth it but I say 18 kcal is not worth talking about if you enjoy it.
 
LaMaria said:
1 dl of whole milk has ~65 kcal. Skim has 47 kcal. You have to decide for yourself if it's worth it but I say 18 kcal is not worth talking about if you enjoy it.
Click to expand...
Thanks for the info! Yeah, it's not worth it. I was thinking of quitting the morning coffees altogether, but I love the taste of it. I could just reduce from 3 to 1 / morning. And have an Earl Grey after that. The egg burger was yummy :)
 
Snack: pack of protein balls, a few bites of cheese and a pear
Dinner: goat cheese wrapped in bacon and salad with tomato and a bit of feta cheese and balsamic vinegar

Overall happy with today's food, however no exercice apart from the normal 3-kids household things. Decided to go out running in the morning, did not.

Notes for tomorrow:
More water in the afternoon! I seem to drink quite a lot of water in the morning, then almost nothing in the afternoon/evening
Go out for a run!
 
Nov 3: 76.9kg
Not much of a difference but still, it is lower by 100g :D
I need to break down my goals. I just told a friend that my ultimate goal is to be a thin person because of what I eat (from 2 months ago till forever) and not a person who lost weight (which implies a possibility of regaining weight). But that seems a bit too general, even if it IS the ultimate goal.
So, Christmas - and having had my birthday end of October I am not afraid of any relapses, I made an avocado-lime cheesecake for the occasion with no sugar no gluten no anything (dates, nuts, avocado, lime, cocoa powder and agavesyrup), and I don't seem to have any cravings for the things I used to eat. So by Christmas I'd like to go under 70. Is that realistic?
For that I need to add exercice. I started so many times, I read so many things throughout the years. So it seems that HIIT cardio and strength training are something to consider.
My problem is that if and when I start exercicing, I overdo it. I run 4-5 kms a day from day 1 for 2 weeks nonstop, then I obviously ache so much, that I have to stop. If however I skip a day, I never go back.
Any suggestions how to do this sensibly? I have time, there is woods next to where I live. But could someone suggest a sensible start to exercising?maybe not walking, my daily steps are around 10000-12000. Thanl you!
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top