Overweight Aerlynn

A

AerlynnMaye

New member
As a young child, I was active and thin. That is, until my parents uprooted my from my hometown and moved me to the middle of nowhere. I was so brokenhearted and friendless at 12 years old that I used food as comfort. I regret that decision every day.

I'm now 17, and I am so uncomfortable with my body. I see my beautiful friends with their thin bodies and happy lives, and I am so jealous. I've never had a boyfriend or even been kissed. I blame my weight for this. Boys aren't attracted to me they way they are attracted to my friends, and I believe it's because I am fat. I have love handles and cellulite. Boys don't look for those things in girls when they are my age.

I've always been so self-conscious. I know other girls my age are also, but I feel like I have 50 more pounds of self hate than they have. I've always had a nagging voice in the back of my mind that told me to lose weight, but I never had enough motivation to do anything.

Now, I have motivation. Over the summer, I met a boy. Him and I became best friends, and I just realized a month or two ago that I am in love with him. Everyday I think to myself, how could a boy like him ever love a fat, ugly girl like me? That is when I realized how low my self esteem is, and I am ashamed that I hate my appearance that much.

I have to do something about how I feel about myself. How will anybody ever love me when I hate myself? I need to change for myself, and part of me also wants to change for him. (Nothing wrong with a little extra motivation!)

I'm going to college next year and I want to start some healthy lifestyle habits now. I just need somewhere to talk about my results and failures, and possibly get some feedback and support.

-Aerlynn
 
First off, sorry about the up-rooting and body re-composition for the worst :(

But I disagree; fat doesn't turn people off as much as one might think--poor self esteem does. And you are right on with deciding you need to turn that around for yourself.

Ah, to be 17! I'm 26 and I have to say it took me many years to get "whole" and have self-love---huh huh actually I just managed inner peace at the middle of being 25 :eek:

However, changing for someone you fancy to be in love with.....there could be pitfalls. My advice?

1. Elevate your skills in all your hobbies and interests
2. Work dilligently with discipline and self love at improving your fitness and nutrition
3. Express yourself creatively in whatever avenue suits you
4. Read--educate yourself on matters that interest you
5. Do massive amounts of YOGA. LOL! Sorry I had to throw that one in there--but seriously, my body has never looked better and my mind/body/spirit connection has never been stronger, and since I became diligent at doing my practice almost every day, wonderous and amazing things keep happening to me. ;) But do what you really want!!

Anyway, best wishes to you and good luck on your love!
 
Thank you for your kind words and good advice =]


I started my first day of exercise after I made my first post. I feel like I've made some great strides today, and I'm getting kind of excited about finally being proud of my self image after so many years of feeling so badly.

I also ate healthier foods today, and I hope that I will keep up with it. Usually, I start exercising and eating healthier, and I quit after a few days. That's why I decided to use this forum. I really want to have something that will keep me on task. I'm hoping that posting here will keep me going.

Day one and things are going well so far =]

We'll just have to see how things go tomorrow!
 
Good luck pursuing the healthier life. Just don't give up. It might seem hard sometimes but you must push through and conquer, you'll love the end result. Trust me. :biggrinjester:
 
I was really sad today because I got into a fight with my best friend and she's not really talking to me, and that almost caused me to go back to my old habits of over eating to feel better.
I'm proud to report that I didn't. =]

I've pretty much stuck to fruit and healthy foods today. I did have some noodles for lunch, but I didn't eat until I was overly full. I just ate until I knew I wasn't hungry anymore. That's a pretty big step for me because I usually just keep going until I feel completely full, even though I know it's probably too much.

I still need to do my exercising, but I'll probably wait until just before bed for that so I can take my shower and relax afterwards.

-Aerlynn

P.S. Thanks for the support! =]]
 
Hi Sweetie!
Have you done any research on how much you should be eating in order to lose weight? Check out your calorie needs related to your height/weight/gender etc. and then keep track of what you eat. Lots of folks on the forum use Fitday.com as a free way to track.

Keep up with the exercise! And here is something else that really works: Replace your negative self-talk (eg. Who could love someone fat and ugly like me) with POSITIVE self-talk and PICTURE YOURSELF AT THE SIZE YOU WANT TO BE! I know it sounds wacko, but it is such a help. We all give ourselves messages throughout the day anyway, so why not make them helpful? Anytime you catch yourself saying or thinking just one nasty thing about yourself...STOP!:smash: You need your own love, not your own hate.

Okay, now that you think I am a total flake, keep up the great work. You are worth it, dear! Be healthy. And if you can forgive your friend for whatever sparked your argument, do it - unforgiveness is unhealthy, and you want friends to support you on your weight loss journey.

Best wishes as you reach your goals,
ABBA:seeya:
 
AerlynnMaye said:
I was really sad today because I got into a fight with my best friend and she's not really talking to me, and that almost caused me to go back to my old habits of over eating to feel better.
I'm proud to report that I didn't. =]
Click to expand...

Sorry to hear that, but you made the healthy choices and stuck through with it--commendable!

And ABBAgirl's post is solid gold--listen to her for sheezey!

Peace and respect, Valerie
 
It's been a few days since I've been on here because we had an ice storm and our Internet has been down. I'd like to say that I've been good, but I haven't really. I exercised, but my eating habits haven't changed much. I am going to try out FitDay now, thanks for such kind words and good advice!

I've realized that it really does help to talk to other people who have gone through similar things. You're all so nice and helpful. So thanks from the bottom of my heart! <33
 
Okay. I went on FitDay just now, and I'm going to limit my calorie intake to 1,327 calories per day. I'm going to start counting (Tomorrow, since I've already had more than that today and haven't even eaten dinner yet, and I don't feel like starving tonight!)

I should lose 40 pounds by May 15. The day I graduate from high school. I know, those robes make everybody look fat, but at least I'll feel beautiful underneath!

I also have good news! I got accepted to Washington University in St. Louis! My dream college! That really did a lot of boost my self esteem this week. Here's hoping it stays up! =]
 
First welcome to the forum you made a really good choice when you joined. it's been really helpful for me to stay motivated and i know it has been for a lot of other people too.
I know how it feels to be a fat teen and i will tell you first hand it is more about confidence then it is about how much you weigh. BTW boys your age are stupid. most of them only want thin girls because the media tells them and their friends you should only date thin girls and they only want to date the girls everyone else wants to date because she thin. i had plenty of butt ugly thin friends and aquantences and yet they had waay more boyfriends then me. and im sure if you could read their minds a lot more of them are interested in you than you thing, it's just not "cool" to date a fat chick... i say F em' you dont want a guy like that anyway, wait until you meet much more mature people....
back to the confidence thing check out this thread
http://weight-loss.fitness.com/off-topic/26668-fat-rant.html
it has a funny youtube link that is funny and also very true...
what else did i want to say to you....
oh! if you mess up one day dont be so hard on your self it takes a long time to fall in to the swing of things for a lot of people and i know from experience it particularily hard when your still young and living with your family. if you mess up just dont give up and press on the next day. people dont fail because they mess up people fail because they say screw it i've already messed it up ill just chow down another burger or 2 more pieces of pizza... baby steps... it takes time, do the best you can and you'll keep getting better at it
 
Congrats on getting into your first choice school! Big achievement there..wow!! For me outer motivation has always been key to helping me reach my fitness goals, though that's changed now since I have no motivating factors except myself seeing as I'm not on the market so to speak :). But hey, nothing like the excitement of meeting new people and having the best and healthiest college experience to whip someone into shape! And wanted to look one's best for a particular guy we have a crush on sure always worked for me :D. Use what works, and obviously like Abba said, the negative stuff really isn't at all helpful. I must keep what she said in mind at all times.

As far as the number of calories, dont feel you always have to go extra low to lose a ton of weight. Especially at your age when its relatively easy. Yup, it gets harder and harder with each decade unfortunately so best to get off the extra weight now. What's your starting weight? Depending on that maybe we could give you some tips on how many calories you could swing and still lose weight. If you make too many drastic changes you generally wont keep it up for long or keep the weight off permanently. What are you doing for exercise? Best of luck :).
 
:waving:Hi again, sweetie! CONGRATULATIONS ON GETTING INTO YOUR SCHOOL!! That rocks.

I am very excited for you and this time of change in your life. Transition is generally hard - beginning with an ending, and ending with a beginning! But the growth is worth every ounce of effort you put in. This time next year, your whole life can be different! You are building the life YOU want.

Graduating from high school and starting College/Uni is a major step in figuring out who you are. You have already done some introspection and know that what you have been doing so far has not brought you the results you desire. No one can make you eat healthfully - except you. And no one can make you exercise - except you. You do the work, and YOU get the rewards!

Keep your eyes on the prize and you are sure to succeed!
ABBA
 
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