Nikki's Story

ND1978

ND1978

New member
I have battled with my weight since my junior year of high school. 6 years ago, I had a baby and never lost all the weight I gained from my pregancy. I've never gone down in size since then. I've been stuck in the high 180's and wearing a size 18 all this time.

Saturday afternoon after getting out of the shower, I was standing in front of my bedroom mirror (I don't have a full length mirror in the house) and turned a particular way that made me get the first full view of my ass I've had in quite a few years. I sat on the bed and cried. I mean, I KNEW I was over weight, but good lord, surely that behind can't be MINE can it??

I am lucky to work for a University/Hopsital and have an employee gym that is a 2 minute walk from my building. I just joined today and will start my workout's tomorrow.

I'm tired of being tired, of being depressed, of hating myself. I'm a good person, I help people whenever I am able and am a good listener. I deserve better treatment from myself. I have to stop putting myself down when I fail or when I'm tired or just for eating. I'm done. This is it. I will live my 30's in a wonderful new body with a wonderful new attitude!!
 
Hey =). I just started losing weight too, and writing a diary on these boards. And I am loving it so far, and I've barely just started. You seem like a really good person and wish you all the will power in the world. Instead of looking at yourself and feeling bad, look at yourself and say 'I'm so proud of myself I'm doing something about this'. I've found that helps a lot.
 
Swampy said:
Hey =). I just started losing weight too, and writing a diary on these boards. And I am loving it so far, and I've barely just started. You seem like a really good person and wish you all the will power in the world. Instead of looking at yourself and feeling bad, look at yourself and say 'I'm so proud of myself I'm doing something about this'. I've found that helps a lot.
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Thanks so much! I'm really trying to keep up the positive attitude.

So, today went pretty well I guess. I didn't really eat TOO differently than I normally do, I want this to be gradual and easy to do, I don't want to feel deprived and hungry all the time.

I really think adding the exercise is going to be the key here. I sit ALLLL day long at my desk with hardly any movement at all. I'm really excited about starting at the gym tomorrow. I love that it revolves around work schedules since it is for employees. I will be able to take classes at lunch time. I think I'll have to work up to some of them, such as the booty kickin step class and the fast paced cardio class. But I'm actually looking forward to the day that I can do them now.

It's a pretty well stocked gym for being in the middle of an office building, lol. Cardio machines, circuit and free weights. I was really shocked how empty the place was at lunchtime today, only 4 people were working out. So at least I know that I won't be waiting in line for a machine all the time.

Breakfast - 2 scrambled eggs, 2 pieces of wheat toast w butter, 3 pieces of bacon. 1 glass of orange pinapple juice.

Snack - 1 large banana

Lunch - ham on rye, a few potato chips, grapes.

Dinner - bowl of beef tips with very little gravy and rice, 1 can of pepsi.

water intake for the day - 6 glasses (that's huge for me, I NEVER drink water).

Off to bed, I'm beat...
 
Yay

I'm about to go over to the gym for the 1st time, I'm so excited!!! God I hope this excitement sticks! lol
 
ND1978 said:
I have battled with my weight since my junior year of high school. 6 years ago, I had a baby and never lost all the weight I gained from my pregancy. I've never gone down in size since then. I've been stuck in the high 180's and wearing a size 18 all this time.

Saturday afternoon after getting out of the shower, I was standing in front of my bedroom mirror (I don't have a full length mirror in the house) and turned a particular way that made me get the first full view of my ass I've had in quite a few years. I sat on the bed and cried. I mean, I KNEW I was over weight, but good lord, surely that behind can't be MINE can it??

I am lucky to work for a University/Hopsital and have an employee gym that is a 2 minute walk from my building. I just joined today and will start my workout's tomorrow.

I'm tired of being tired, of being depressed, of hating myself. I'm a good person, I help people whenever I am able and am a good listener. I deserve better treatment from myself. I have to stop putting myself down when I fail or when I'm tired or just for eating. I'm done. This is it. I will live my 30's in a wonderful new body with a wonderful new attitude!!
Click to expand...


You can do whatever you put your mind to.
 
ND1978 said:
I'm about to go over to the gym for the 1st time, I'm so excited!!! God I hope this excitement sticks! lol
Click to expand...

Good luck, the excitement totally isn't there (at least for me) when you are about to fall over of exhaustion, but you feel SO good afterwards! It's totally worth it, it gets easier each time too.
 
OK, so I went to the gym and... I'm a bit disappointed in myself. I only did 1 mile on the bike and 3 machines. I just didn't want to over do anything the first day. I mean, I'm as active as a sloth now so I wanted to ease into it, but now I feel like it's not enough.

Ah well... tomorrow I will be going to the cardio/strength training class...
 
You're doing better than I am, jumping right into the exercise. As much weight as I have to lose I wanted to see my doctor before I start doing anything too strenuous. My appointment's just a week away! It sounds like you're off to a great start, so don't lose your momentum. If you feel your resolve flagging, buy yourself some new workout clothes and/or shoes. That's been pretty good short-term motivation for me in the past. New toys!
 
I'm a bit upset today... My husband and I had an argument. It was a misunderstanding on my part and things are fine now, but the bad feelings are still lasting. I don't know why, things are good.

I'm about to head over to the gym in about 20 minutes, hopefully a nice workout will help me feel better!!
 
Sooo, let's see where I left off yesterday... oh yeah, going to the gym. So I did 15 minutes on the treadmill and 10 on an arc trainer (that thing about killed me). Then I did some free weights for my upper body.

When I got back from the gym, my MOTHER-IN-LAW had put a piece of chocolate oreo cake on my desk during lunch!!! I should have thrown it away when I saw it, but I ate 1/2 of my lunch instead of all of it and ate the piece of cake. I felt guilt afterwards, especially because the cake wasn't even that good... but I've moved on now. I still had a pretty decent day I think.

And I'm down 1/2 a pound since last week!!! It's small, but I'll take it, a loss is a loss. The last few days I went UP a pound every day, so I was surprised this morning, but I think that may have been water weight from all the water I'm drinking now.

I feel really good today and already can't wait to hit the gym.
 
sounds like you are doing good...

does your mother in law know your plan?

I sometimes wonder if people don't want us to lose wieght...argh!

then again, my brother REALLY wants me to lose weight, so get all passive agressive at him and act like i don't care about my weight!
 
Jillzy_2008 said:
sounds like you are doing good...

does your mother in law know your plan?

I sometimes wonder if people don't want us to lose wieght...argh!

then again, my brother REALLY wants me to lose weight, so get all passive agressive at him and act like i don't care about my weight!
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She wants to go back to the gym with me, so I don't think it was a real sabotage, lol.

So, let's see... Yesterday was unbelievable. I went to the gym at 11:00 to try to beat the lunch crowd and was invited to join in with the 11:30 Just Abs class. I thought I was going to die. I almost threw up and passed out! I sweated more in that class then 3 days of cardio combined. I did some of each exercise instead of trying to kill myself keeping up with everyone. It was great. It hurt, but the instructor was wonderful.

Eating yesterday was ok. I have to stop eating my big breakfast though I think, which sucks, cause it's good and filling.... Maybe if I stopped eating the 3 pieces of bacon I could keep my 2 scrambled eggs and 2 pieces of wheat toast?? I'm always really hungry in the morning and need that to be my big meal.

My morning and afternoon snacks have been a banana or grapes. So I'm pretty proud of myself for my first week overall.

I will go to the gym today even though I'm a bit sore, just to walk on the treadmill. :hurray:
 
I did no exercise this weekend and the things I ate weren't the greatest, but I didn't eat a lot of stuff, so I guess it all balanced out. If the weightloss I saw this morning is any idication anyway. I only change my ticker on Thursdays but I was showing a 2.5 loss! YAY.

So I did the treadmill and a bunch of lower body stuff at the gym today. My eating has been spot on, my water... ehhhh. lol
 
I feel amazing today!!! I'm wide awake, the scale still showed my 2.5 lb loss, my pants aren't as snug and I noticed my double chin is disappearing!!! :hurray:

I am so proud of myself. This is the first time I've stuck with a weight loss plan. I'm seeing some results already and it's not hard at all.
 
ND1978 said:
I feel amazing today!!! I'm wide awake, the scale still showed my 2.5 lb loss, my pants aren't as snug and I noticed my double chin is disappearing!!! :hurray:

I am so proud of myself. This is the first time I've stuck with a weight loss plan. I'm seeing some results already and it's not hard at all.
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hooray!!!!!!!!!! :hurray::hurray::hurray::hurray:keep it up!!
 
Hello there. I loved the last part of your first post, it was really inspirational. We can really do this! Keep us updated about the loss Nikki okay? Much love.
 
skimmilk said:
Hello there. I loved the last part of your first post, it was really inspirational. We can really do this! Keep us updated about the loss Nikki okay? Much love.
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Thank you!! You know, I had to go back and read what I wrote in my 1st post, and I'm so glad I did and that you pointed it out to me. This is what I need to look at should I ever get down on myself or lose that motivation. It's a good reminder of WHY I'm doing this.
 
ND1978 said:
Thank you!! You know, I had to go back and read what I wrote in my 1st post, and I'm so glad I did and that you pointed it out to me. This is what I need to look at should I ever get down on myself or lose that motivation. It's a good reminder of WHY I'm doing this.
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I really liked it and I am very glad you wrote it, so thank you! ;-) Congrats on those 2.5lbs!

:hurray:
 
Hello..i just wanted to stop by your diary! It looks liek your on a good plan!! CONGRATS on the loss & workouts!! I hope you contuine to have a good week!!!
:hurray::hurray:
 
Thanks so much you guys!!! It's so great to have people understand and give positive feedback. People at home who have no weight issues just don't get how we NEED that pat on the back sometimes.

Thanks again!!
 
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