Newbie's "I will do it" journal

newbie16

New member
Hey people!!! It is 10 in the morning here. I have faithfully stuck to my quest to lose weight for 6 days now. :D I feel great. I never thought I could pull this off again. I went through the whole weight losing thing 4 years ago and succeeded too and then because of too many emotional problems I put on weight again. For the past one year, I was in a kind of denial.

One could say my eyes are open now and woohoo, from somewhere I have gotten my willpower back :D I know that I can't do this alone. So please support me :)
 
Keeping one self busy really helps to overcome those urges. With my exams coming around the corner, I am concentrating on studying and nothing but studying. And of course, having a supportive boyfriend also helps :) He loves me for what I am yet he is supportive of me in my goals. :) :) I am off to study now. Here is to the rest of the day :)
 
Another day gone. And it was satisfactory. Though I couldn't walk I did a bit of exercising in my room. It wasn't productive academically though lol :D.
Today was great. I walked 2 miles, climbed up stairs (without using the elevator), and I feel confident. I even walked past my favorite snacks shop without buying anything. I feel incredibly proud :D :D
I badly need a weighing scale :( How can I keep track of my weight without that :(
 
Hi!

I'm new too. I joined a few weeks ago and it seems to be a positive thing so far :) A little inspiration and support goes a long way. How did you get that ticker to go under your posts?
 
Hi emitch!! Welcome :) :) Just go to tickerfactory.com, choose the template, create a pin for yourself, enter your details. Once you are done you get the html link for your ticker, and you can use that link as a signature for yourself.
 
Now for today's update. I walked another 3 miles today and the weather took a turn for the better. It rained heavily and it was beautiful. I did eat quite heavily in the evening, but hopefully I had burnt something of what I ate. Another day successfully gone. Congrats to me :D LOL
 
Well today is what can be described as my cheat day :( I walked about a mile to my college. My lunch was pretty heavy because I suddenly felt really hungry. After that I walked another mile back and then started studying. Something about studying made me want to eat so I had a plateful of noodles. I know I shouldn't have, but I did it. It din't stop there though. My friends and me walked a mile and a half to an ice cream place. The day was just too hot and we couldn't resist ice creams. So yeah had an awesome mango chocolate flavoured ice cream and walked back. The best part of the day is my walking I guess. I walked nearly 3 miles and I feel glad about that. I just hope that such cheat days are far and few between :(
Here is to tomorrow.
 
Hey there! Did not post yesterday because I was too busy studying (or so I say). Well, today was another awesome day. I must have had about a 1000 cals of food which by itself is awesome. But, I walked another 2 and half miles today and I am feeling awesome :D :D. I am glad that I have found something to be proud of. Tomorrow is a special day and I am glad that I have something to show myself in the field of weight loss. Though my aim is to lose weight before May I am glad that there are some changes in my body. I can see that some clothes of mine have become loose. I can see that my cheeks are losing their puppy fat. Most importantly I feel great :)

This sense of achievement is so satisfying. But I know that I am walking a tight rope. I need to be extremely careful to not fall on the other side. Tomorrow will be another cheat day I guess :( I should do my best to make it better. Let us see what happens.
 
Well, yesterday was not as bad as I thought it would be. In fact, I managed to eat pretty much within limits except for that cake :( It would have been churlish to refuse a birthday cake, so I ate it. I assumed that the moment that dark chocolate touched my lips I would be unable to resist anymore and would go back on my eating, but surprisingly that did not happen :D. The best part was when my friend asked me whether I had lost weight because I am starting to look less fat :D

As to today, I walked 2 miles again and I did not eat much. I wish my mess food comes with a calorie calculator. LOL :D I have to start studying today and I hope I don't eat too much. I am happy that I am on my way to losing weight again :D :D
 
Hey there! I did not post yesterday because I slept for 8 hours straight in the afternoon. And then I had to study of course. Yesterday was a depressing kind of day. A friend of mine called me fat :(. Agreed I am fat, but to make another friend of mine feel good about her weight, he called ME fat. It made me feel a bit depressed for sometime and then I got over it. Or rather just made me more determined to lose weight.

Today is revelation day. I had been giving serious thought to turning vegan for the past few months, but somehow I couldn't imagine giving up all those goodies. Chocolates, milk, sweets, cheese, cakes and the likes.I have been a practicing vegetarian since I was born. But somehow today, I realized that if man had no rights to kill animals he doesn't have the rights to take advantage of their vulnerability either. Will a mother give up her milk to something? Even thinking about it seems disgusting. Doesn't a cow and a goat have the same rights? Who are we to deny their kids what belongs to them? Isn't that cruelty too? So yeah! The new Vegan me. I don't know how being vegan will affect my health and my diet. Will have to read into that. But if PETA advocates vegan, then it must be atleast scientifically proven to be healthy right? So that is it for today. I walked only a mile :( Until next time. Tata
 
Hey Newbie16.

Just came across your diary and thought I'd say hi and you sound like you're off to a great start.

Re veganism, I think if you devise a meal plan that ensures you get all the necessary nutrients and such it should be fine, but from what you've written it sounds like you might be at college, so if you're stuck trying pick out the few vegan friendly foods that the college provides it might be an issue, unless you tend to cook for yourself.

That's horrible what your friend said, it's one thing to hear that kind of thing from people you don't know or like very much, but when it comes from friends or family its so much worse (I should know, my mum gives me daily reminders of how much I've gained!)

Anyway, keep up the great work! :)
 
Hi Boslo! Thank you very much for your encouraging reply. It feels heartening to know that I can count on such supporting people :) And regarding me going vegan, I am afraid I will have to give it up for now. According to my customs and traditions, milk and ghee should be an essential part of our meal it seems. So vegan is a dream that I will have to give up for now. :(

Continuing my journal, I am afraid that my past one week has been a kind of cheat week. I have come back home and I have been eating a lot. Sweets, and all kind of fatty food. I don't know whether there is any connection, but it's been a week since I posted here. I can now see that keeping a track of what I eat always helps. When I was in my hostel, it was very simple to just not buy snacks, but in my house we also have a stock of snacks and sweets and so it is far more difficult to resist :( But resist I must. I just wish that this emotional depression of mine goes away. It would be so much easier to do what I want to when I am not feeling down and depressed. Here is to tomorrow.
 
Well I am been going through a phase of depression now. It is not helping my will to lose weight :( I feel like nothing is worth anything. I was feeling too ashamed to even log into my journal. But THIS JOURNAL HELPS!!! I have been reading my old posts and now I feel determined again. I will not let my emotions get the better of me. I can see that I have been sulking and depressing myself in the past one week. I can't do that to myself again. I have started measuring my meals again. I hope today will be a good day.
 
Okay, needless to say, I have not been really sticking to my weight loss plan. And I have been ashamed to face this day, where I come out into the open about my apparent lack of will. I am not making excuses, but a bad relationship and an extremely horrible break up, all added up to my emotional burden and I never got the will to resume my weight loss quest. Now, I am here again. I won't kid myself by saying that I am determined and willful again. I still feel odd at sorts. But, I am gonna try to get myself back into shape again. Somehow! I have lost too much in life, and I am gonna become a loser. I am gonna become a fighter again.
 
Okay, so I read the rules/suggestion thread only now :D If writing down my weight loss progress helps, then I might as well do it right :)

1) How much weight do you want to lose - 15 kgs

2) What is the timeframe for reaching your target weight - I don't wanna push myself too much and end up bingeing. So I would give a year.

3) How do you want to accomplish your goal (what methods do you want to use) - Eating right. This is the most important thing for me cos my diet isn't too great and its mostly unhealthy.
Exercising everyday.

4) Who or what can support you in reaching your goal - I am pretty much a loner :) There isn't anyone I can really share this with. I think I am too ashamed to admit to anyone that I have a weight problem. I would rather do this on my own.

5) How realistic is your goal - Pretty realistic I would say. Losing 15 kgs in a year comes to burning 300 extra calories in a day.

6) When will you start - There is no better time than right now :)


7) What is your current height and weight - 158.5 cms and 71 kgs.

8) If you were at an ideal weight now, what would that weight be - Ideally 50 kgs, but realistically I am looking at 55.

9) At what weight would you like to be at four months from now - 66 kgs

10) Why do you want to lose weight - I want to be good looking, wear the clothes I like, feel attractive again and be healthy too.

11) Do you want to lose weight for a specific life event such as wedding or reunion? If so, when is that event?
Not really. I try to set deadlines around events, but somehow they are never motivating enough. So I have stopped doing that and am trying to lose weight for my own sake and not to impress people.

12) What obstacles could get between you and your weight loss goals - Honestly, myself. There is this weird part of me that reaches out for food when it gets bored, depressed, lonely, etc etc. Those are the times when I find it real hard to keep up my resolution.

13) Why do you think that you now have a weight problem - I am way too emotional??

14) What lifestyle changes do you think would help you lose weight - Getting good friends? It has been ages since I had a close friend with whom I could share everything with. Lifestyle vise, I can't really think of anything.

15) Have you lost weight in the past? If so, what has worked in the past to help you lose weight? - Yes I have. 4 years back. I played badminton and lost a couple of kgs.Somehow I drew inspiration from that weight loss and kept going at it. Completely stopped eating junk food, chocolates, ice creams, walked ragularly and hey presto, lost about 15 kgs in a year.

16) Why do you believe that you did not lose weight or you gained the weight back? - I was in a bad relationship that was an emotional roller coaster. Now I am taking small steps to get my life back in track again.

17) What, if anything, has not worked for you in the past in helping you to lose weight? Why do you think it did not work? - Crash diets! They have never worked and I am pretty sure they never will.

18) Would you try writing down all food and drink consumed for a given period of time? - Yes of course. I have already started doing that and it seriously helps :) Now I know how much I have consumed for the day and how much more I can have for dinner.

19) Do you cook at home often? If so, what do you cook? - No. I stay in my college hostel.

20) How often do you go out to eat? Where do you go? - Not too often. My downfall are biscuits, snacks, chips and the likes.

21) What are your three favorite foods? - Potato, Chocolate, Pizzas. I know totally unhealthy is what I love.

22) What are your three favorite restaurants? - Pizza outlets generally

23) What are three things you can do differently when it comes to food? - Unfortunately all that I can do here is control the amount of food that I eat. I cannot really do anything about the way it is prepared.

24) If you woke up tomorrow and your body was exactly the way you want it, what would be different? - I would be 4 inches taller and 20 kgs lighter :) And throw in higher cheekbones :)

25) Do you eat when you are not hungry? - All the time :( It is more like, when I feel hungry in the evening I open a packet of biscuits and before I know it they are gone. I cannot stop myself from eating even after my hunger goes away.

26) Do you binge eat (large amounts at a time)? - Whenever I get good food in the mess, yeah I do that.

27) Do you hide your food or eat in secret? - Not really.

28) Do you eat when you are sad, nervous, or depressed? - Yes, yes and yes.

29) Do you eat as a reward? - Actually no. When I am happy I tend to eat less.

30) Do you eat while watching TV or using the computer? - When I watch movies or reading books yeah.

31) What do you normally eat for a meal? - My diet has changed a lot after coming to college. Before it was mainly rice, but now I eat chapathis and vegetables.

32) What type of snacks do you eat? - Biscuits and chips.

33) In terms of exercise, what, if anything, are you currently doing? - Treadmill (walking and running), elliptical and cycling.

34) Where do you go for exercise? A local public gym? School/work gym? Home? - College gym

35) What, if anything, are your three favorite types of exercise? - The ones I mentioned. I love walking, a lot.

36) What is your daily/weekly/monthly/yearly motivation to move towards your goals? - Hmmm, I haven't really thought about this. Guess I should.
Yearly - I want to look good like I did 3 years back.
Monthly - Oops, I don't really have any monthly, weekly or daily motivation :( :(

37) Do you have rewards for certain goals? - I am planning to reward myself with clothes for every 3 kgs lost.

Whoo!! This is certainly an eye opener. Especially the motivation part. I never realized that I have no short term motivation. Or if I do, I don't know it yet. I should give it some thought. Because this is really important.
 
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This is the time of the day I hate the most!!! :x I have exactly another half an hour left for dinner, but I am feeling extremely hungry! I don't want to snack, but my head is actually starting to pound :(
Obstacles, obstacles, and more obstacles!!
 
Welcome back to the site, Newbie! I wanted to comment on something you said:

4) Who or what can support you in reaching your goal - I am pretty much a loner :) There isn't anyone I can really share this with. I think I am too ashamed to admit to anyone that I have a weight problem. I would rather do this on my own.

Well, you are here, on this forum, so now you have support! Share your progress with us, and don't be ashamed. As you probably already know from losing weight the first time, you will have good days and bad days but as long as your good outweigh your bad, you are making progress. I never shared my weight loss goals with anyone except my boyfriend, but have found a ton of support here on the board. And I will gladly 'pay it forward' and help keep you on track. :)

Good luck!
 
I never shared my weight loss goals with anyone except my boyfriend, but have found a ton of support here on the board. And I will gladly 'pay it forward' and help keep you on track. :)

Good luck!

Thank you Laura :) It really is very encouraging when someone supports us in our quest for weight loss :) I am sure I will have my bad days, too, and that is when I will need people the most. It feels good to know that there are people out there for us on those days :)


Day 2:
Yesterday night, I faced the first test of my will and I passed it. At around 4 in the morning, I suddenly felt a craving for food. I knew something like this would happen, which is why I had thrown away all my snacks and stuff. However, my craving turned to actual hunger and I almost made myself noodles. Something within me swooped in and saved me :) I feel so proud of myself :)

I got up an our back. Made myself bournvita with milk. Now its back to studying. Yesterday, I consumed 200 calories less than my daily requirement :) My fat consumption was 10g above however :( I am gonna make up for that today. And I have successfully started my journey again, and one day is completed. :)
 
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Hey newbie!! How are you? I'm in school too so I understand how your appetite is affected w/ all the studying and lack of sleep. Don't worry...you can do this!! Just the fact that you're conscious of having made some mistakes shows you're on the right track! Keep it up! =)
 
It's such a good feeling when you face a test like that head-on and walk away successful! Mine was when I knew I had the apartment to myself all night and found myself standing in front of the Ben & Jerry's at the grocery store (because that's what I do when I'm home alone, I eat pints of ice cream). And I walked away with individual-sized light ice cream instead. Once you do something like that you realize how much you're capable of. So great job!
 
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