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Jesus Freak1

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Hi !

I am the husband of a wife that is discouraged about losing weight. I would like your suggestions on how to encourage her. She is about 5'4" and 200lbs.
We have been married 12 years, and after 2 children ( ages 8 & 11) she has been having difficulties getting any of the post marriage/child bearing weight off. I believe she weighed around 145-150lbs when we got married.

My wife exercises, but not regularly. She has tried "Weight Watchers" with some success, but quit about 2 years ago.

Thanks !!
 
Does she want to lose weight? If so, why? You need a strong enough why if you're going to make enough action to realize lasting change.

She also has to have the right mindset... as in, this isn't a diet. It's a lifestyle.

But like I said, the whole lifestyle thing isn't too applicable if she doesn't know her 'whys.'
 
I know she definitely wants to lose weight, but hasn't gotten up enough will power to do it. I know weight loss/control is a discipline.......because I practice it. But, if I say anything to her, it's received by her as negative.
 
when a person is ready to - it takes little effort - losing weight is easy... and doesn't require a lot of willpower...

-they just have to make sure their head is in the right place.. .You can't do that for her and if you try it does come across as negative, nagging, etc.. and makes a person less willing to try.

Encourage healthy habits but don't criticize or get her to do things she doesn't want to do yet...
 
In other words, keep doing what I'm doing. Lead by example, just live the lifestyle of exercise and healthy eating habits. Even encouraging words are generally received as, " So, you think I'm fat ?"
 
Start incorporating active hobbies into the mix. Even leisurely walks about the hood can do some good. Hikes, biking, etc, etc.

And if she opens up the discussion about being overweight, take the opportunity to invite her to join in on your exercise program.
 
Thanks ! BUT, been there....done that. It's not like she doesn't exercise, she swims a couple of miles a week. She has been to her doctor to see if there was any medical reason as to why the weight wasn't coming off....no luck. It appears to me that what calories she is burning, she is replacing with food. I understand weight loss = calories burned>calories taken in.
 
Ya, so it comes down to nutrition.

There's no right/wrong on how to approach it as everyone will respond to things differently.

If she doesn't see value on changing her eating habits, she's never going to.

And it's not that she doesn't see value in it. She just sees more value in sticking with her current habits.

If she didn't, she'd change.
 
Steve said:
Ya, so it comes down to nutrition.

There's no right/wrong on how to approach it as everyone will respond to things differently.

If she doesn't see value on changing her eating habits, she's never going to.

And it's not that she doesn't see value in it. She just sees more value in sticking with her current habits.

If she didn't, she'd change.
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Amen !:Angel_anim:
 
HealthyEating said:
Whatever you do, don't call her fat. I told that to my ex-girlfriend and she got really angry.
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Exactly ! It's just frustrating, because I try to do all I can to stay @ a healthy BMI not only for me, but for her.:banghead: I feel a sense of accomplishment that I am able to do this, and still eat the foods I like.:party:
 
Jesus Freak said:
Exactly ! It's just frustrating, because I try to do all I can to stay @ a healthy BMI not only for me, but for her.:banghead: I feel a sense of accomplishment that I am able to do this, and still eat the foods I like.:party:
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Wow, rather delicate situation.

Unfortunately the main person she is going to need to want to do any weight loss for is herself. She's not there yet. Eventually she may come around, but she's gonna have to really WANT to lose the weight, not just pay lip service to it.

Hopefully if you continue in your healthy ways you can lead by example. Best of luck.
 
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