BrookiesMom
New member
Hello, I am new to the forum and in an ongoing struggle with my weight. I've struggled with weight ever since I can remember. The only time in my life I was actually thin was when I was 14 and anorexic. It took me years to get over the trauma of an eating disorder and in the meantime I ballooned up to 240lbs. Shortly after my husband and I started dateing I began dieting again and started to loose weight. At our wedding I weighed 170 lbs and I looked good. Although the damn BMI calculators seem to think I was still overweight. What kills me is that I never once enjoyed it, I felt fat and constantly put myself down. Six months after we got married I got pregnant. I ended up using my pregnancy as an excuse to eat whatever I wanted even though I had told myself that I wouldn't. I ended up gaining 60lbs during my pregnancy and as of right now I have lost about 14 of those lbs, my daughter is 6 months old now. I want to cry when I look in the mirror because I am so ashamed with the way I look. I don't want my husband to look at me much less touch me and I am extreamly depressed which is causing tension in my marriage. More than anything I want to feel good about myself and right now I don't. I'm 5'11" so I already feel like a big girl, any extra weight just makes things worse. My goal is to hit 160 lbs. I am really hopeing that haveing a support network like this will help me get to that point.
