New here and on a mission :)

focus1

focus1

New member
Hi everyone, my weight loss journey has finally started.
Every ounce of me says I'm going to succeed this time.
Sometime last week I noticed my body and mind wanted to finally cooperate
and help each other, which hasn't happened in years.
I'm 32 yrs old, a wife and mother to 3. I weighed in at 178 lbs today (from 185 2 weeks ago)...I feel energetic, happy, focused and strong.
I like to research & experiment, this is really giving me a lot of success...
My latest experiment is with cinnamon, I'm putting sprinkles on everything I find difficult to digest, swallow or just plainly eat. I've done some research into this neat little spice & wow!!!!
I used to have trouble eating healthy foods such as oatmeal, salads, carrots, drinking water etc....but with a sprinkle of cinnamon added I can eat these foods with ease (even water goes down better!)...sorry if this sounds weird, and maybe it won't work for anyone else, but it's working for me :)
Cinnamon is however a blood thinner, so you have to be careful & read up on it before using. There are a ton of awesome health benefits! I used to think it was just something to throw on cinnamon buns to taste better...lol, but it's so much more!
I like fruits & veggies now & eat them daily, I eat natural fiber, protein & mostly raw foods that don't need cooking. I cut meat out for now & am taking some supplements (coral calcium, vitamin D, omega fatty acids).
I am waiting for my stevia (natural sweetener) to arrive & then will cut out the refined sugar in my diet...at least for the most part.
Yoga!! I have started doing yoga & love it!! Very relaxing & enjoyable, plus great for your body & soul.
I'm in the middle of researching some other foods (incl. soy,flax,honey, berries & nuts) and will slowly add these into my routine as I go.
I have a set of hypnosis cds that I listen to for inspiration & enjoy reading the posts and seeing members progress on this site!
The pictures of members are super inspirational!! So I'm going to post a few of myself soon.
After years of mistreating my body I don't expect myself to look healthy.
I am surprised & not surprised at the same time that I let myself fall so far down, but I'm a survivor, I've always been.
I needed time to be unhealthy to really understand what I really want in this life. And what I NEVER want to be again, along with all of the reasons.
I needed to gain strength for the journey. I'm ready.
When I was in shape before, I had less confidence & inner strength than I do now, so this time around will be amazing!!!! I will challenge & succeed!

I wish strength & happiness to all :)
 
Thanks Angel!

Ok, I feel like I took a few steps back last night, after doing so good for so long...I gave in to about 6 chicken wings and a pop tart (which didn't even taste good)!! Yuck!! (The wings were good though)....walked 1/2 an hour on treadmill at 3.0 incline, 3 kmh...felt good after that.

I spent from Thursday-Saturday reorganizing my house, need to put the Christmas tree up still & go shopping!!!!!!!!!!!!


Stevia powder came in on Friday, I tried it & don't like it. It's ok, but it left an bitter aftertaste & I think it made me hungrier. I guess I'll keep the refined white sugar in my tea & coffee, I've never like Sugar Twin etc....honey is good though, maybe I'll try to add it into a cup of tea or 2 a day.

Oh, Saturday night my Mom in Law had a huge Xmas supper, and I'm proud of myself!! Instead of eating for my whole family...lol, I ate something healthy at home before we went & had a plain baked potato at the supper.
For exercise (and because I like to help out) I did the dishes and cleaned up.

I'm noticing a difference in my face, shoulders, waist and a bit on my hips. Yayyyyy!

Ok, I need someone to take some pics so I can get them up on this site.

Bye!:party:
 
:seeya: and Welcome!
You sound pretty determined; I think you will not have much trouble in reaching your goals.

Re: cinnamon. Yes, it is a little powerhouse, isn't it? My only concern (besides the blood thinning) comes from an experience I had where I was chewing lots of cinnamon gum - AND IT WAS EATING OFF THE INSIDE OF MY CHEEKS! No kidding, I was constantly tasting "metal" and my mouth was burning! Took a bit to realize it was the gum, but as soon as I stopped chewing it, I felt better. Is that weird, or what? LOL

Best wishes on your journey! Good for you for recognizing the other night as a minor setback; very important to put those things behind us and just keep on trekking towards the goal!

Cheers from :eh:
 
Thanks Abbagirl, you're so right about the cinnamon, I now use it extremely sparingly (even a 1/2 tsp. a day was too much for me) I couldn't taste anything anymore and was also getting that metal taste. So I guess a sprinkle in the oatmeal will have to do!

I'd like to get some kind of grinder for the flax seeds I just bought. I was reading up on flax & found out that it is most beneficial when ground up. Maybe a coffee grinder will work?

Tonight I'm going to increase the treadmill time to 40 mins & see how that goes.
It's funny but when I stare at myself in the mirror while working out, time seems to fly by so quickly! I imagine myself leaner with each step. Good thing I have curtains, because I'm constantly making silly expressions...haha...
It's actually kinda boring without a mirror. Music might help too, but seem to be entertaining myself ok for now...lol.
 

hey well done with the loss so far and change in ure face and waist.

it jus made me laff the comment about lukin in the mirror. i do that when i excercise. i dont listen to music. i think alot and contemplate a bit. time seems to fly doin that. i think bout my birthday. thats my final goal date!! hehe i sound really wierd.

good luck wid da rest.

;-)

x
 
So last night we went out for supper, wasn't too hungry all day so all I ate was a banana & drank tea & coffee up to the time we went out.
I know I should've ate more throughout the day, but some days I'm not so hungry.
We took our youngest son with us (21 months) so we had to literally inhale the food (baby wasn't in a good mood)...lol....
Had a 10oz New York strip steak (ok, I splurged)
Steamed veggies on the side, which were really yummy!
Gave away the rice & slice of garlic bread that came with meal to son & husband.
1 tall glass of Ice water & a coffee w/ c&s
Had a nice time, besides rushing through it.

Thought I'd do 40 mins on treadmill, but never happened...that's ok, maybe tonight.

Will make oatmeal soon for lunch (have a manderin orange on the side).

Told myself not to step on the scale this morning, but did anyway.
Weighed in at 174lbs, I'm happy about this!!

My mini goal is 160 lbs, 14 lbs to melt away...

I plan on giving my clothes away when I shrink out of them, more incentive to not gain the weight back unless I want to wear a towel..haha.
 
Oh ya, I'm thinking of getting an Ice crusher to make ice for all the water I drink.
Crushed ice makes me drink way more water! Good to keep hydrated. Less coffee, more water! :)
This, I'm sure will be my favorite kitchen toy.
 
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HEY well done!!! great weight loss!!!!

i have days like that when i dont feel hungry at all. best thing people told me to do is eat healthily, little amounts throughout the day. that way you dont suddenly feel starving and also your body doesn't think you're starving. it works with me i think.

why don't you try to do atleast 10 mins on treadmill a day. taht way yo'll get some excercise. im not sure how practical that is though. i certainly have days when i have zero time for excercise. ;-). but if you're like me you want everything perfect and planned which i realised never happens so just take every oppurtunity that comes.

to much rambling. lol. sori

;-)

x
 
focus said:
Oh ya, I'm thinking of getting an Ice crusher to make ice for all the water I drink....maybe I'm part polar bear??
I've always had a love for ice, used to chew trays at a time, but unfortunately (and obviously) bad for your teeth, I cracked a molar this way & had to have it removed....but I miss eating ice sooo much!
So I'm figuring that if the ice is all chopped up into tiny pieces it should be ok.
Click to expand...

because the habit of chewing ice drives me absolutely insane -i t's sucha gross sound...

ive spent some time researching it...



Craving and chewing ice (pagophagia) is often associated with iron deficiency anemia — although it may be associated with other nutritional problems as well. In some individuals, pica is a symptom of emotional problems, such as stress, obsessive-compulsive disorder or a developmental disorder.
Click to expand...

Have you ever been tested for anemia?
 
Hi Maleficent,
I've been tested once, & negative, it's more out of enjoyment than a craving...
like eating chips, cookies etc. I'd rather have ice. I know that some people crave it when their low in iron, it's nothing like that at all, thank goodness!

I prefer ice to be small enough to just drink along with the water, but never thought about a machine that could do this until now. Don't know why?



Hooray!! I went to the local thrift store today & actually found an ice crusher...for $2.99!! It works awesome & I've been enjoying my new "toy" since I got home. It was weird how I wanted one, and presto...there it was!


Thanks Angel for the advice! Smaller amounts at a time might work, I'll see what I can do about that. ;)

I count all the work around the house I do in a day as exercise too, so probably at least 6 hours of a day of being busy doing stuff.



:seeya:
 
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Haven't done much today yet, just sitting around, kinda lazy.
I'll start doing stuff in a few minutes.

We already have about 5 feet of snow here, maybe I'll take the little guy out to play in it.

Had a glass orange juice (with crushed ice) to start the day.

When we get back in the house, I'll make some oatmeal w/flax seeds & some blueberries (mmmmm...)

No weigh in today, will wait till tomorrow.
 
focus said:
Haven't done much today yet, just sitting around, kinda lazy.
I'll start doing stuff in a few minutes.

We already have about 5 feet of snow here, maybe I'll take the little guy out to play in it.

No weigh in today, will wait till tomorrow.
Click to expand...

dont worry everyone has days like that. me more so than others. You are soooo lucky you've got snow. we dont get much (sometimes dont get any) where i am in england!

good luck with the weigh in.

;-)

x
 
Well today, I weigh 175, went up a pound, must be the heavy thinking....lol
I hate gaining when trying to lose, but it's inevitable, and it's only a pound!
Keeping the ticker the same.
Need to tell myself that I can't lose everyday! This is where my mind and body ALWAYS start the bickering, I thought I had that settled within myself this time, my body needs to lose at it's own pace & my mind needs to relax about it.
Sheesh, my upper conscience level is soooooooo immature sometimes!!
Deeper down into the sub-conscience I know that kind of thinking is whacked.

I felt this coming on yesterday, I had a feeling that I was going to go up on the scale, so while driving around Christmas shopping last night I had it in my mind to just stop and grab a fast food meal, I drove for over an hour contemplating with myself....this was my thought pattern.....maybe it will help to write this to look back upon. (The crazy thing about this is that before dieting I have had take out maybe once a month...and as soon as I start trying to get healthy, it turns into a regular & extremely strong craving).

So I left the house, with the thought of a Big Mac meal on my mind, tummy kind of feeling empty, but not hungry enough to grab something at home.
Started driving around, urge got stronger, started to actually taste the juicy burger and fluffy bun, mmmmm...imagining this in my mind, the smell, taste, how good I'd feel if I just stopped and ordered a meal, checked pockets for money, mmmmm...yep! I'm going! But where? Was the next question. So I started thinking....McDonalds....started picturing ordering & then eating their best meal.....mmmm...not bad, A&W has a special on 2 Mama burgers for $5, I forget what those taste like, pictured eating these, not much sensory went into that thought..Burger King...nahhh, McDonalds sounds the best so far....Ok, let's think about that Big Mac meal again....
Oh yeah, that burger....I feel like I'm in heaven, god this tastes good, then move on the fries... can feel grains of salt and grease clinging to my hand as I touch the fries and grab a small handful, eat this handful...mmmm....

And all the while..... I'm driving as far away from any damn McDonalds as possible, far away from anything! Ended up wayyyyyyy in the country, in the pitch black dark, alone, & thank god far, far away from any McDonalds!!

As the thoughts grew more real & my urge got stronger to the point of deciding yes!! That's what I want....I cleared myself from this danger. My body and sub-conscience were doing the driving, well mostly....

It really made me mad at myself for almost giving in, and for what?? 5 minutes of McHappiness?? So glad & thankful now that I did the right thing for me....because I could've blew this whole healthy life thing away, for something so dumb...and really selfish.

I want to loose weight so I can go more places with my kids (and husband) and feel good about the way I feel and look. I want to give that to them, any weight I lose, my family will benefit from, so if I sabotage this, in a way, I'm sabotaging them, and I love them with everything my heart can possibly give.

To some, maybe I don't look that big to you, but to me...it's enough to keep me hiding from life, from the world. I wear a long sleeved coat to hide myself even in the summer, everyday, everywhere, so when everyone else is in a bikini....there I am....dressed like it's 20 below. I just block it out (what others could possibly be thinking or saying)....it's easier to block than uncover & expose myself, my shape, my personality.

In a way I don't mind it, I usually feel I can regulate my temperature with my thoughts, so I can keep my jacket on & not sweat & it works 99% of the time...somehow...

But I've focused way too long, and way too hard on covering up my poor health and body image. I don't want to go through another summer like this.

I want to be enjoying it with my kids. It means everything to me to get out of this!! I have to! I want to.

If I fall, I will come back to this website, and it will keep me going, right now & probably for a while I'm going to really need a place where I can go to release some of these feelings. I don't wan't to tell anybody else...just my diary & the people on this website, who are going through their own journey.

Sorry if you come to my diary and are repelled, disgusted...whatever, read what you want, come & go as you want....but this is me....and these are my feelings and thoughts.



Still hanging on strong.

So yeah, today has been a bit rough, but I'm learning.
 
Chances are you didn't really gain a pound, and it's just a perfectly normal fluctuation...

Broken record mode here:

measure measure measure - those results will be far more telling of progress than the scale will :D
 
Thanks Maleficent, that's a much more positive thought.

I think I'll go for a once a week weigh in, every Saturday & measure the rest of the week.

I also need a regular schedule to exercise, and I'm going outdoors to do it.
While the treadmill is a good backup, I need fresh air and change of scenery.

I used to be an avid walker, since I was a kid....just loved walking. A pair of shoes were lucky to last a month before wearing a hole through the bottoms.


I'll post again later tonight, plan to go for an hour or so walk tonight. Will write about it later....
 
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measuring daily won't give you the immediate results your looking for - go for every 2 weeks or so and the rest of the time, how your clothes are fitting... and what you're seeing i the mirror...
 
My clothes are getting quite a bit looser, my shirts are looser in the arms, and waist and some of my pants are hangin low on my waist, they used to be pretty snug.
So I should measure about every 2 weeks? I guess everyday would be totally overdoing it...ha! Thanks!
 
focus said:
My clothes are getting quite a bit looser, my shirts are looser in the arms, and waist and some of my pants are hangin low on my waist, they used to be pretty snug.
So I should measure about every 2 weeks? I guess everyday would be totally overdoing it...ha! Thanks!
Click to expand...

hey that is always a great feeling!!!
well done!!

;-)

x
 
Went for a 45 min. walk last night. Felt really good to be out in the fresh air!
I want to start bringing my dog, she's a 120lb white German Sherherd X, and a real puller on the leash.
Last time I took her my ankles and lower leg muscles hurt for about a week, but I think I'll get one of those training harness things for her so she can't pull as much. We usually bring her out to the country to let her run, but she doesn't go enough....and I'd like a walking buddy, so this could work.

Had a bowl of cereal this morning and some ice water...will add an orange in a few minutes.

Feel like my spirit's up again today & back to normal, don't have lows too often, but when I do I give myself a real butt kicking (mentally).

:cheers2:
 
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