My life has been a country song...

bikinibound said:
Girl--it does get better than that!! Much better--although sitting out reading a classic novel isn't so bad, just lose the nasty cig..lol.

As I've told you many times before, you DO deserve the best in life. It sounds as though you are working hard to get it. It's great that you're going to school and improving yourself, and becoming independent from H. I see no reason why you should stay with him as he is. It certainly is not healthy for you or your children. While he's gone it's a bit different, but when he comes back, if he is the same, or only slightly better, it's time to cut the cord and get on with your life. If not, you'll look back in 10 or 20yrs with a lot of regret. 25 is still young, and there are plenty of good men out there who will love you and treat you the way you deserve to be treated.

DO NOT SETTLE!
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:iagree:With most of this - lol...it is hard to feel and know your self worth and to refind your self - confidence when it has been *beatin* outta ya for sooo looong...Boy did I struggle with that it took me years after my relationship ended to refind my self worth, self confidence and self esteem, he made me feel liek I was nothing and worth nothing, when you here it enough you beleive it.

Althought I hear alot that there is that one person that will treat you well adn so on and lobve you for you, i never eally beleive it...I have never found that yet, even before when I was dating before settlign with my ex...right now Im just happy beign single raising my girls...im not sire if Im ever gonna relaly want another relationship.

You just need to know what you need and get it or get rid of it to create it ya know...

Oh and life is meant to be good and happiness is for real , lol...I was miserable my last year with my ex and I was more miserable for years after it ended but boy am I happy now:) and much better off.
 
I exist! :rotflmao:

Oh, have I been busy [finally!]. I drank too much, smoked too many cigarettes, and had all kinds of fun. Mostly the good kind, so don't worry. At some point, Sunday night, I learned that light beer has 95 cals a pop and it's hard to hang curtains holding a beer. I'm no Martha Stewart. When I woke up Monday morning trying to figure out where I was [in my own room], I decided to lay off.

Anyway, now that all the crud is out of the way, I am determined to meet a goal. My weight is just one of those things that drives me nuts. I fluctuate between 194 and 201 all the time! I remember crying my heart out the first time I hit under 200, and the old guilt stabs me each time that I creep up again. I would like to see myself get under 190 [for the second time]. I was there January '07. It's time to clean out the system with good food, priorities, and hard work. I'm think that I should give myself a few months. Any ideas? It's just in the area of 10 lbs. If 2-3 lbs a month is ideal, I'm looking at 3-4 months. Hmm... My hubby comes home for 2 weeks in October. I should try to be well under 190 by then. I will do this!

I also have a mini-goal. I bought 7 pairs of shorts from Old Navy, size 16, that I would love to fit into nicely. Ya know, without looking squished in. I need to work on that. I want to look good in what I own by August, when I start work and school again. I'm pretty sure that I have 11 weeks. Time to get to work!

Also, I have a countdown. The hubby will be back state-side in 1 yr, 7 mo, and 13 days. When he comes home, we're going on our real vacation. Like, some destination in the world and not just out of state. So... I'd like to be at peak by then. I don't know if I can really lose a good 50 lbs by then, because I suck at commitment, but I should try. If anything, I should want to look damn good in vacation pictures from Australia or Berlin or Prague!

*daydreams*
 
I spent over an hour this morning raking my back yard. I cleaned up leaves, twigs, branches, kid toys and dog poop. That will be my exercise for the day. I know I'm going to be hurting like Hades tonight or tomorrow.

Now it's back to housework!
 
So, these past few days have been really wild and crazy, in a good way. I found out yesterday that I could run. I found out today that I'm not as uptight as I used to be. I also managed to look decent in my favorite jeans tonight. :) I got my eating back to a manageable norm. I have been cleaning like crazy and more on the move than usual. I worked on my tan, my mental state, and my morals. I drank tons of water. I am honestly fairly happy. Not at all how I expected things to turn out.

Goal one: 10 lbs. No luck on that yet, but it's way too early to worry. I just need to keep on going. I weighed 201 this morning for a reason... :0
 
That is an awesome attitude you have there :)

Focus on the positives and work on the things that you can change over time. Celebrate the successes you have and the accomplishments you've already made. Good luck on your 1st goal of 10lbs. I have a goal of 10lbs right now too. I can't wait to see ya reach it;) I just bought a pair of William Rast jeans that are a 32 that I don't quite fit into yet, so that is my future goal, to get into those so that they fit me comfortably and I can rock them :coolgleamA:

You have an excellent rest of the weekend,
Sam
 
Hey Cutie - my goal is to fit back into my jeans:)!!! LOL...Im glad you are posting and happier htese days...Ive been happy and content and it is a weird feeling...LOL
 
Glad you're having good, productive days! :party:

Fitting into clothes again is a great feeling, and should be a good motivator to keep on trucking. :)
 
And the good mood continues with the scale hitting 198 this morning!!! Could this really mean 8 more lbs to goal one?!?! Woo hoo! :D

I really am looking better. I'm meeting a new trainer tomorrow and I'm going to see about working on inner thighs and upper arms. 2 major problem areas. I'm going to the beach for a week in July and I have roughly 4 weeks to do a little something for confidence. Of course, I really just want to float on lazy river all week with a beer in hand. Ah, luxury.

I ate really bad today and I will be paying for it tomorrow. I was on the road most of the day running errands, but it's no excuse. I just couldn't guilt myself into feeling bad today. That's not like me! On the upside, I'm not over-eating. :)

I've gotta get to bed and be ready to face "John" tomorrow. Wish me luck!
 
I had a great 30-something minute work-out! :D I worked those problem areas and I know I'm gonna hurt bad tomorrow. The trainer I had today was young and sweet as could be, but he's leaving. My usual trainer is grumpy and moody. I'm going to try a new guy on Thursday. I hope he's nice. I just didn't know what I was missing. Having an encouraging trainer makes so much difference.

Scale still read 198 this morning. That was encouraging. I would like to stay away from that thing for a week at a time, but I can't. Every morning, I have to know. :) Just me!
 
Scale said 198.2 this morning. Woo hoo! I need that encouragement b/c it feels like my muscles have been replaced with shattered glass. I hurt so bad. I hurt in places I don't think people should hurt, lol! Ugh, but I asked for it. I don't know what I can do today. I meet with another trainer tomorrow and I don't want to be stiff, but I also don't know if I can work out today and risk being immobile tomorrow. Maybe a walk?
 
I AM SO PSYCHED! :party:

I am psyched enough to type a sentence in all caps. *gasps* I'm psyched enough to wear a skirt I only wore two or three times last summer. I'm psyched enough to run in here and spill the beans. Woo hoo!!! I'm excited.

And why is that?

I met with a new trainer today. He's been in the biz as long as I have been breathing the air on this Earth. [[25 years]] He's kind and motivating. He's going to make sure things get done; things my other trainer has neglected to do since January. I was finally weighed and taped today. I need to chart my food for him and he's going to work on a diet. He wants me to see improvement by July. Me too, since I'll be going to the beach for a week! He has given me more complete answers in one session than I got the whole time with that other dude. My goal, standing at 5'4 is to weigh 150 lbs. So, here's to new beginnings and a 50 lb challenge!
 
Looks like life feels like getting in the way of happiness. I talked to my husband today. He was supposed to come home for 2 weeks in October. That has been postponed until February! The last time I saw my hubby was in January. This sucks more than I can express. I had to cry. War is so *$#@!%&* terrible! I hate it!
 
I'm sorry to hear that your hubby won't be home as expected. It sucks. :(

But, please tell him thank you from me...and thanks to you for your sacrifice in living w/o your husband home with you.
 
Judyb said:
I'm sorry to hear that your hubby won't be home as expected. It sucks. :(

But, please tell him thank you from me...and thanks to you for your sacrifice in living w/o your husband home with you.
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Thank you. It means a lot to me every time I hear this. Especially when I get a little thanks too. I won't write a sermon on how hard it is on me or him or the kids. Just, thank you.
 
Just got back from the gym. I did 30 minutes on the skier. I'd go 2 minutes at a good pace, then spend one minute "racing." One of the trainers I saw told me to try it. 5 minute cool down from that. Then I did 10 + 3 minute cool down on a bike. I was too tired to keep on the skier! Grand total of 48 minutes. Not bad!

My new trainer wants me in the gym 5 days a week. Next we'll go over the dreaded diet. Ugh. I know I need to do this, though. I was watching AOL (?) news about these women in bikinis who had lost over 100 lbs. [[It was weird, but it got the point across.]] And I'm pretty sure that they all had to diet. You know they exercised b/c they were in bikinis. There is no way to drop a 100 lbs just by dieting and expect that skin to go back where it should. My dad dropped a good 150 lbs and his legs embarrass him. He says he looks like an elephant. I don't want to know, so I take his word for it. *ramble ramble* I'm sure we have all thought about this.

I have a million things to do, so I best get up and do them. It just feels so good to sit. :D
 
Good work SoSel!

That trainer sounds like he knows what he's doin. Keep working hard and don't weigh yourself too much. In my experience it can be a downer to weigh-in too often and not see the results you want fast enough. If you eat right and keep working at the gym though, your hard work WILL show.
 
Great job on the workouts! That new trainer sounds like a really good one. Looks like you have your own personal drill seargant..lmao!

Yes, you will have to diet my dear..lol. But the more you exercise, the more you can eat. ;)
 
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