My Journey: Positive Outlook For 2013

Hey girlie, you are on the right path. I know it's frustrating but just continue to do what you have been doing and the weight loss WILL CONTINUE. It has to. Cheer up Hugs x
 
MandyH said:
...Maybe instead of having a cheat DAY I'll just have a special snack. As for exercise, I'm really limited. I have a treadmill, but can't job. I don't have a gym membership, can't afford it, especially now with Christmas right around the corner. It's winter now so walking before/after work isn't an option because 1) it's to dark at both times and 2) it's getting to cold. I really don't know what else to do. :(
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Well, it sound like you have been losing at a constant pace a little at a time. That sounds good to me because then you are less likely to gain it all back and then some like I have done in the past.

One thing I do is when I watch TV, I stand up and walk in place and lift my arms up and down flexing them. When it goes to commercial or after about 15 min I pause it then I walk back and forth in my house about 3 minutes then come back. So I am watching something to distract me and burning some calories. I also do this when I am on the computer. If I am reading, I lift my arms out to the side then up keeping my hands in tight fists and lift my feet up on the balls of my feet and flex my legs. I then press down with my heals and lift my toes up and tighten my stomach and roll my shoulders. Movement burns calories right? So every little bit helps. I'm even doing the foot thing and flexing my legs right now as I type. Computer exercises...LOL I know it probably sounds funny, but a little here and a little there adds up. :)
 
MrsWoods, I'm ok, I guess. I'm alive anyway. I'm picking up the pieces right now from a major failure of a weekend. I need to get refocused. I think that starts with catching up on everyone's diaries so that's my goal tonight. I need to get inspiration from somewhere.

~~

I had a HORRIBLE HORRIBLE HORRIBLE weekend of eating. :( I'm so sick and tired of not having any will power. I want to lose weight more than anything in the world right now, but that little voice inside of me just won't stop telling me to eat, eat, eat.

Saturday started out ok until I picked up a bag of cookies and cream santa claus chocolate bars for WORK. I had no intentions of opening the bag at home, but in the end I did. I had a bar or two here and there throughout the day until I reached in the bag and felt nothing but air. I ate the whole damn bag in one day! That's 1600 calories alone! Then for dinner we decided to order out so I got a medium fry and an asiago ranch chicken sandwhich from Wendy's. I'm sure that comes out to well over 1,000 calories. My mom, who didn't know I ate all that chocolate, also surprised me by getting me a banana strawberry shake from Burger King. At least that was a small.

Yesterday wasn't too too bad. I had some french toast for breakfast (dad made it) and then I didn't eat again until dinner. Dinner was a larger than usual steak with some mac and cheese. The steak was HUGE so I cut it in half and split the other half between the dogs. They were psyched at least!

New game plan. I'm not buying anymore chocolate unless it's a flavor I don't like. I can safely keep whoppers and any chocolates with coconut. And, if I DO buy chocolates that I like I'm giving them to my mom to hold on to so I can't binge on them. I honestly can't believe I ate the whole damn bag! I'm surprised I didn't go into sugar shock!

One good thing about yesterday is that I decided to call this weekend a wash and I got a bottle of A&W Cream Soda. I LOVE this soda and that's what I used to drink all the time. Well, I cracked the bottle open and realized that it didn't taste as good as I remember it. I only drank half before dumping the rest. At least I'll have an easier time fighting that urge.

My weigh ins over the weekend. I was 196.8lb Saturday, 198lb yesterday, and 198lb again this morning. Another good thing about this weekend is that I got Taebo in Sat and Sun so hopefully that'll help make the damage not so bad.

Ugh... I just feel like a total failure right now. I HATE this feeling. Why oh why do I always give in when I KNOW damn well I'll feel like this after the fact? :(
 
Mandy, sweetie ..will power is just an emotion and it comes and goes.

We need to just do it, no matter what...How can I say this, you just have to stop, be hard on your self is being kind to yourself and try not to put too much emotion in it = just do it.

You are not alone, we all have cravings etc...remember that and we all go to bed hungry at some time..again you are not alone. Just always remember that 99% of women losing weight are in the same boat as we are.
Do we really think that all these famous people just eat what they want and stay slim...BIG NO.

I so want to see you succeed.
Hugs mrs woods.:)
 
Thanks MrsW.

I know I just need to dig deep and stop giving in. I need to stop being a baby when it comes to this food addiction. It's just so frustrating, and embarrassing to share these details, but that's why we're here right? The ironic thing is that last week I was bitching about not losing weight fast enough. Well, what good did eating a whole bag of chocolates do? I mean really. What's wrong with my head. I can't justify it. There is no justifying it. It happened. I need to accept it and look forward at this point I guess.

Back at square one. Trying to get through today with no more chocolate. Temptation is EVERYWHERE!
 
Mandy ...good post, we all are in the same boat and remember you are not alone.
We all struggle and as you said that is why we are here.
Try and take more emotion out of it...it is only food.

The only thing I can add to, as when you have a craving is (before you give in)
1) drink heaps of water
2) think how you will feel in the morning?
3) Lets say you want pizza...go and grate a big carrot and have 1 piece eating it with the grated carrot then..
4) repeat number 1) 2):willy_nilly:

You know you don't what to put the weight back on.
Remember how much you have dropped and be proud of this, and tell me how did you do this sweetie?

Yes you know. Lots of hugs mrs woods.
PS I only lose a pissy bit each week now ...but hey it will all add up and you are still so young. Do it now.
Your body will thank you , trust me, end of rant :nopity:
 
Thanks MrsW. I definitely know I'm not alone in this. It just really sucks to feel so weak and dependant on food. I'm over it already. I just want to be and feel "normal". :(

~~

Alright, I'm done dwelling over my failed weekend. Looking forward is all I can do at this point. So, with that said I'm back at square one. I had oatmeal with peaches for breakfast, I'm getting ready to have a can of pineapple shortly, after that I'll be having a garden salad with chicken, afternoon snack will probably be some triscuit thins or maybe even pumpkin seeds. Dinner's up in the air as usual. Maybe a grilled cheese or a chicken sandwich. We'll see. No dessert! Drinking loads of water too.

I won't be able to exercise tonight. I don't know why, but my left hip is really sore today. I could've pulled something or maybe it's a new arthritis pain. I just don't know. It started feeling that way yesterday afternoon (so I dusted some house work instead of exercising yesterday). If I fully extend my leg (just like when you walk), it hurts. Needless to say I can't do taebo under this condition and even walking on a treadmill is probably out. So I'll be taking it easy again today. I'm hoping it'll feel better tomorrow so I can back into the normal routine. All the more reason to be really cautious of what I eat over the next several days. No exercise means I really need to be strict with calorie intake.

Will try again tonight to get caught up on everyone's diaries. I hope you're all well.
 
Hi Mandy! You're struggling and that's bad because it means things aren't going as you like, but it's good because to struggle is to fight.

Maybe do some dumbbell work with your arms only (canned goods if you don't have dumbbells). It would give you the satisfaction of having exercised and it will burn some calories and strengthen your upper body a bit.

I hope your hip feels better soon and you have more success with your diet and scale.
 
Hey Mandy! I'm sorry that you are struggling. I'm right there with ya! It hasn't been the best week. Just know that you aren't alone! You slipped up.... Put it behind you and start fresh! :) things will get better!! I hope your hip feels better soon!! :)
 
Hi Mandy. Sorry to hear you have been struggling :( You are doing so well with the weight loss, don't beat yourself up over the bad days. Hopefully your hip heals quickly and you can go back to your Taebo. I second Q's suggest though about the dumbbells. Doing some arm workouts shouldn't hurt your hip and at least then you are doing something.

Feel better!
 
Hi Mandy,
Taebo is really hard on your hip flexors. If you go really hard day in and day out doing the same movements, you could get that level of strain. A little rest and you should be fine. Try some gentle hip flexor stretches too, there are plenty of examples of them on the web.

Two weeks ago I felt just like you are feeling. It can be really annoying to feel like you are working so hard and yet still not where you want to be. I really feel like that, so I understand.

What I do when that happens is do something to make myself feel pretty. I do my nails or give myself a pedicure. Maybe a clay mask. Try a new hair style, my hair is really long so maybe a new braid or curls.

And if you can buy yourself one new piece of clothing, doesn't have to be expensive..a t-shirt will do, that you couldn't have worn before, but can now.

Right now you are working so hard, a little reward is in order. I know it seems to help me. Maybe it will perk you up too! :hug2:
 
Hi sweets, sounds like there's a few of us struggling this week. There's some good advice being given by some caring people here. Even if we take 2 steps forward & 1 back, we're still moving forward! Chin up my friend, take care & keep looking forward. Life IS good! xoxo Cate.
 
Thank you all so much for the support. It's really appreciated! :)

I didn't want to post this yesterday because it was embarrassing, but my weigh in almost had me back up into the 200s. I weighed in at 199.2lb. That for sure was a HUGE eye opener for me. I DO NOT want to go into the 200's again! I didn't think it was really, a true reading from my bad weekend. I know I ate a lot, but not enough to gain almost 3lb in two days, especially considering I got my exercise in for both of those days. This morning was a big relief when I weighed in at 197.4lb. Still up from Saturday's weight, but much closer to where I want to be.

I made a promise to myself that I am NOT going to binge anymore. It's easier said than done, but I'm really going to dig deep to make sure this does NOT happen again. I can't allow it too. There's just too much at stake.

I don't remember the last time I spoke about my upcoming vacation, but it's getting here fast and I'm getting super excited for it. I'm going away from 2/28 - 3/8 to the Dominican Republic to snorkel with "our" humpback whales with my mom and another mother/daughter duo that we're friends with. The place we're going is called Silver Bank and that's the breeding grounds that our whales go to so there's a chance that we will see some of the whales we see on our trips up here. We'll be arriving in the Dominican on the afternoon of 2/28 and then on 3/1 we board the boat that we'll be staying on the entire week. We'll have no internet access or anything since we'll be at sea the whole time. I'm not looking forward to that part, but it may be what I need to really enjoy myself. Anyway, in order to do this trip we need to get wet suits. Aside from my health, the whole wet suit thing is a huge reason why I've been trying to lose weight. I need to stay focused here! :)

Well, yesterday was a great day for food intake. I did not have any junk food. Today I'm shooting for the same. I didn't get any exercise in yesterday. I got home and just felt drained (probably a side effect from all the junk food I consumed over the weekend) so I just showered and rested. My hip still feels a little bit off today so I'm not sure if I'm going to do anything tonight. I might try Taebo at a more relaxed pace or I might just try walking on the treadmill. Then again, I might just hang out with the dogs outside to get some new pics of them. We'll see.
 
That vacation sounds fantastic. I'm glad your weight is heading back in the right direction for you. Your 200 is my 300. We were both about 50 pounds above the mark when we started and I will fight to stay below it once I'm there. Of course the main difference is that you are below 200 and I've got over 30 pounds to go.

As far as the binges go I would try to focus on there cause. Is it emotional or is it from completely forbidding yourself something you crave? It may be a combination of causes that when they are all in sync they make a "perfect storm" of binging.

Please don't feel bad about yourself for overeating as that isn't productive or necessary. Your not bad. Chocolate's not bad. Eating lots of chocolate supports weigh gain. That's it. Just a cold fact. Nothing bad or evil about it.

If you deny yourself something because you eat too much of it, you may desire it until you break and binge on it. This will make you feel bad and punish yourself again by denying the food again. It can become a cycle. Maybe have chocolate. Buy a small quantity that would be an okay amount to consume at once and only buy it with a frequency that is okay for your calories/diet plan. You could say I'll have x amount x times a week or month. If you aren't craving it you can put off buying it until you have a strong craving day. A kind of emergency supply. I realize that chocolate becomes available at inopportune times and quantities, but if you find a special chocolate then that can be yours. The chocolate that you eat. Make it a super nice chocolate and you can pass on other chocolates as inferior and not worth the sacrifice of calories or exercise.
 
Hey Mandy -
that bag of chocolate that shouldn't have been eaten: been there, done that..good thinking. What is done is done, look ahead and focus the future. You will do fine!
I agree with Q - chocolate is good - Go for quality not for quantity maybe :) that's what I am trying to do!

I am so jealous of your vacation. It sounds fantastic!! You will have tons of fun! & exercise too!
 
Q - I wish I knew why I craved the chocolate the way I do. It's not just chocolate though. It's Skittles, it's chips, it's ice cream. I think it's just because I've had almost an entire lifetime of having those foods whenever I wanted them. I think this new lifestyle is still new in comparison so I'm still in the adjustment phase. I really don't think there's a subconscious reason other than breaking old bad habits. I have decided to try something new to see if it'll help. Instead of going no chocolate I am going to allow a little bit more frequently. Yesterday I had (2) hershey's nuggets. Dark chocolate with almonds. I broke them into 2 pieces each so it felt like I had 4 pieces. It satisfied my craving and I didn't think about chocolate for the rest of the day. Maybe this is what I need to do to stay sane. :)

Justina - I know I'm not alone. I try to be good, but temptation is so hard to fight off especially now with all of the holiday goodies out there. I'm determined to get back on track though! :)

We are pyshced to be going on this vacation. We have our airline tickets booked, but still need to lock down a hotel room for the night we get there. I'm not to fond of the idea of flying, but it's the only way to get there so I'll have to suck it up. Aside from the swimming with whales part of the trip the thing I'm looking forward to the most is that the boat we're staying on has a completely open upper deck with rows of cots. Just envisioning laying on one of those cots late at night watching the stars, smelling the sea air, hearing the ocean... Oh, it's going to be like heaven to me! :D

~~

My hip was feeling ok when I got home from work yesterday. Still a little tender, but not bad. I waited until late in the night and decided to give Taebo a try. I still took it easy on the kicking moves and some I skipped all together and did different moves when those came up. I was concerned with how it would feel this morning, but it's feeling at 100% again today. Maybe the workout yesterday is what I needed to fix it.

I weighed in at 197.4lb again this morning. Instead of being upset, I'm thankful that it's not higher. I think it's safe to say that I can get back into my normal routine now. It did feel good getting that workout in after two days off!
 
Nice work Mandy on the chocolate, the exercise, and the attitude. The scale will catch up to your efforts.
 
You are doing great Mandy! And I think your decision on the chocolate is a good one. It will allow you to feel like you aren't denying yourself something you crave, and it won't result in you overindulging. Glad your hip is feeling better!
 
Mandy! Ive missed a lot! You're in the "ones"!! Congratulations and well done! Good for you. I see you've had some up and downs, but you've soldiered on. You are doing so well and I truly look up to you. You slip, but you dont fall. I need to learn to do that. One tiny slip and I'm on my face. Your vacay sounds like its going to be absolutely fabulous and is somethimg nice to look forward too. Hope it gets here quickly for you!! X
 
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