Me have unsupportive mother/sister

E

eccent

New member
Hi there. I'm so at a loss. I'm so frustrated with them that sometimes I take on that tone and most of the time raise my voice. I've been telling everyonr around that I want to lose weight I'm going on a diet. I won't eat after 8pm. Usually, the time I arrived home it's already 8pm. So my Mom would always left something for me which I will tell her no. Then after when I'm doing my things if the food are not kept away she'll ask again.... I felt like "What I have told you I'm not eating didn't I" Well... she did that for the whole week after I told her I won't eat after 8pm. Then after a few session of wasted breath...she didn't ask me anymore but leave the food on the table.

Then sometimes when I got tons of things to do at night, I might eat or when there's no food sometimes I'll ask her is there anything to eat. That is when I think I really need the nourishment. After that she'll continue to ask me again for sometimes. Gosh.... I felt really frustrated!!!!

Then there's this sister, who forever complaining about her tummy but refuses to do anything. She will reprimand me for raising my voice again Mom and also when sometimes I started to eat on my own accord. The idiot will throw scarcastic remarks ssaying that why am I eating...I'll be scolding my Mom later for failing my diet! That is a whole lot of bullshit! I won't blame anyone what I put in my mouth but I felt betrayed when I told Mom that I won't eat and still she pestered me on it. the whole female population of the family is so unsupportive!!!!

Like today I came home at 10.30pm and she suddenly put a cup of soya milk on my desk...sharksss!!! I dun want that! 200cal at least! And I've told her before mann.... urghh.... I'm going berserk... What should I do? I'm at a dead end.....And I'm so busy at the moment to exercise so I'll have to cut my snacks! At least eat only what I want not what is bestowed to me!.....Help!
 
I feel for you. Years ago, I joined Weight Watchers. When I got home from my very first meeting, my (now ex-) husband made a big plate of nachos and kept trying to get me to eat it. He was very unsupportive about my wanting to lose the weight that I really needed to lose. I kept asking him not to offer me food, but he would still do it anyway.

My advice is to politely turn the food down if you don't want it. Although it's VERY frustrating, it's better than getting angry. Take your anger out on eating healthy foods and exercising instead. That's what worked for me. Even though he would keep offering food, I would thank him and politely refuse anything that was not good for me. I used my anger to "rebel" by exercising and losing 40 pounds.

Some people feel really threatened when you want to get healthy, especially if they are not following healthy habits. Stick to your guns, act sweet, eat right, and exercise. Make sure you have healthy snacks available for yourself when you get hungry so that you don't have to ask your mom for food. Maybe save up some of your calories for when you get home so that if your mom offers you something healthy, you can eat it. Make sure she knows what kind of foods you're trying to avoid and what would be good to have around the house.
 
if yer mum leaves you food for when you get home, throw it in the bin. she'll soon see what a waste of food and money it is and she'll stop.
 
wow, so sometimes you get angry for her giving you food, and other times you get angry when she doesn't? i'm confused! i don't know how old you are, but maybe you could offer to simply make/buy your own food. your mum might be getting completely mixed signals from you. she may also have thought soy milk was a good healthy snack and just wanted to see you were having something.

this is coming from the mother of an incredibly rude and nasty 16 y.o., for whom i can do nothing right (and frankly, rarely want to), so please don't be cross with me! i think we can all get a bit self centred sometimes, its crucial to try and improve your communication, if you can't move out then make moves to fix the relationships you are in. everyone will be happier.

good luck!
 
Thanks everyone

Thanks for all your replies. :D. Urr.. sheidi I never get angry when my mum doesn't leave food for me. I'll consider myself blessed really. I always like to prepare my own food honestly but sometimes it juz give me a sense of impoliteness and it's juz bad to reject food from your mum you know. Anyway... she stopped giving me food now. But well I'm taking medicines so I need to eat my dinnner... but well I think it's better to choose your own food. Anything went wrong you know what but not otherwise. I was really angry when I wrote my initial post but still then I've gotten over the fact. :p

Thanks ljag and summergurl for your support. I'm in asian community...we don't move out even though now we're working.
 
OH MY GOD! Eccent! I SOOO feel for you.
That's my mother too! I mean, I know she loves me..... but gah!

My Mom pushes cake and sweets and more food on me even though I tell her I don't want it or I'm full. And she'd say how I'm flushed and I'm not eating enough or she'd say how eating too much veggies is bad for me. HOW CAN EATING TOO MUCH VEGGIES BE BAD FOR ME?!?!

I know exactly how you feel! Hang in there girl!

Are you Asian? Cause I'm asian. Personally, I think it's an Asian mentality. You feed the people you love cause in Asia's past, most people starved. heh... ^___^;;
 
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