2Skinny aw thanks 
you're a nice person, even when just posting in your diary. I am so happy to know that my post came at a good time for you, because I know that feeling so well. My mood turns around so quickly sometimes, from bad to good, and also from great to horrible, so I know the importance of coincidental well-timed support. I hope you have a beautiful Tuesday as well.
MissLadybug I completely apologize! I have been meaning to check out your diary for DAYS! Thanks for the congrats, I appreciate it I hope I can manage 8-10 for the month of May. I found that these monthly challenges are great to keep in mind all day long. I'm actually shocked that I'm still posting in my diary. I've never stuck to a healthy plan and I'm really proud of myself so far.
And it is a beautiful Tuesday! I woke up craving spinach salad this morning. I went and took my first final and I don't know how I did, but I'm happy it's over. I have 5 more exams and then I can relax. I'm not sure if I want to take a summer course but I will feel so guilty if I don't. I mean if I don't take a couple classes this summer, I can work more, which means I'll totally ruin this great schedule I've been sticking to for the past couple of months. Yes I am a 21 year old girl who's concerned about her sleep pattern more than anything else. I've already mentioned it but I've never been on a regular schedule like this before and I have to say, I love it!
THEN: work until 3 in the morning, get home at 4, crash in bed, wake up at 10, smoke another cigarette to ease the pain in my throat (cause I had smoked an entire pack the night before), go to the beach, lay in the sun, smoke some more, drink some more, eat all the southern fried goodness that is in abundance around here, then shower and go to work, then order all the delicious fatty food from the kitchen before my shift, then start the whole process over again. I was just a roly poly smoking sunburnt girl. I feel in control right now.
NOW: go to class to take another test, go to the grocery store to buy the stuff for my spinach salad, come home to finish my research paper, then I have to exercise, then study for exams.
I'm having a real problem identifying a real point to my posts lately. I hope that for anyone that has read this far, I know this stream of consciousness style writing is annoying but well....it's nice to allow myself to write without a sense of format or organization.
I just got off the phone with my best friend Kate from home. She's the one who is getting married in August. Kate and I know each other so well and I love her so much, so our conversation made me feel for her. She's also overweight, and she feels so defeated. I told her that she should really come and join the forum, and start a diary. Sometimes when we discuss the difficulty of trying to lose weight I can tell that she gets fed up and wants to change the topic. We discussed how when you're surrounded by people who don't understand the battle of weightloss, it's ultra depressing and discouraging. For instance, I guess you could say that our other best friend Ker is one of those people that simply has the motivation to workout every day and eat reasonably, which seems to make it even harder for Kate (because they're still together in the same place). Kate was in shape all through high school but in the 4 years that we've been out of high school it's been hard for her, and now it's 3 months from her wedding date and she's thinking "what's the use?" I want to motivate her and I just can't break through. I told her that I totally understand how hard it is when her fiance, mother, family, and friends are all trying to help her when really they feel more condescending than helpful. Not their fault of course, it's just how it appears to the person who needs motivation. We decided that it's different between us because we each understand how the other is feeling. When I try to let her know the things that have been working for me though, I can sense that she feels threatened. Please I want to OVERCOME THIS. There is this intrinsic thing within women (regarding other women) that just scares us when someone else is succeeding with something which we feel that we cannot also do. I told her how much I respect her for managing to deal with the scrutiny of staying in our hometown and suffering the gossip of those cruel girls we went to high school with. I also told her that she needs to think "**** them, I'm going to get sexy for myself. Their opinions don't matter." The thought of having to deal with all the people I spent my high school years with on a daily basis makes me feel totally ill. It's not like I didn't enjoy hs or anything it's just that I'm happy that I don't have stare my past in the face every day. Wow sorry for rambling. I've gotta get some stuff done now!!!
Oh I just got back from the grocery store and I was looking at all the soy milk available and I decided to try it out.
SO GOOD! I never include much fiber in my diet, at least I don't think I do, so I decided to go with the vanilla fiber-rich soy milk and it is so yum. No more cow juice for me. I could easily look up the pros/cons of the soy milk but I'd rather know if any of you drink soy milk and if you do, why? Ok...I'm actually just trying to avoid exercising. Let's hope I go do it now.
-Breakfast: 4 egg whites- 80 calories
-Lunch: Cream of Wheat- 400 calories
-Snack: Applesauce/Cinnamon- 200 calories
-Dinner: Spinach Salad/Balsamic Vinaigrette/Tomatoes/Basil Feta Cheese-300 calories & Multigrain Cheerios/Vanilla Soy Milk/Raspberries-300 calories
-Water: 4.0 L
-Playlist: Costello. Bowie. RHCP. Imogen Heap.
-Miles Today: 3.0 miles
-Total Miles: 81.5 miles
