Lisa's Final Countdown, The Good Days, the Bad, & the Ugly

Buckeye, thanks but it was such a pain in the butt, lol. And I still have another ten pound bag to do :X. But I figure it'll cut down my work so much later cuz I HATE peeling potatoes and the mess just for one meal. Good idea on the pasta but how do you keep it from getting dried out? And thanks :) I was so happy to hit 313!

Ivette, thank you SO much. You get scared of getting thinner too? It's a relief to know I'm not the only one...not that I'd wish that on anyone else but I always wondered wtf my problem was. I mean I'm able to lose so much weight and then I honestly do think it gets out of my comfort zone and I've sabotaged myself in the past. I think though now that I have this forum I'll be able to work through if it happens again. But honestly I think I'm ready for the change...and I told myself hey...it's not like I have to commit. If I it ends up that I'm completely insane and find I don't like being skinny, it's not like I don't know how to pack the pounds back on :X. Just a little fat humor, lol

Thanks George, I'm just chippin away at it. Gettin more and more excited though cuz I really feel like I've figured this out. Man I sure hope so!
 
ahhhhh she is sooooo daggum cute!!!!
do you ever get the urge to squeeze the life out of adorable things?!?
>_> thats how i am feeling right now >=D i just want to hug her soooo hard!!!
hehe... jk jk lol... i do squeeze my goats though... just cant help it...
i love 'em!
 
So today I miscalculated. I packed all my food but ended up having to unexpectedly go to an away special olympics game for the girls. I had packed a frozen dinner for lunch and had no way to take it so I ended up eating with them at Arby's for lunch....a market fresh sandwich for over EIGHT HUNDRED CALORIES!!! I coulda had a flippin burger! Then I was kinda held hostage at work, lol. I was supposed to get off at 6:30 but my boss was supposed to be at our house hours earlier. Of course when she says "soon" that could mean minutes, hours or days, lol. By the time she showed it was after 5 and everyone wanted to go eat. We went to the mall and a chinese food place I used to love had re-opened. Unfortunately none of the food tasted like it had so really wasn't worth the calories. I hate that when that happens...wasted splurging. Anyway I was 358 calories over today with no flex calories to offset it. No more Arby's sandwiches for sure...I coulda had their large roast beef and chedder for 200 calories less than the supposed healthy one. Tomorrow starts over a new week though so another opportunity to do better :)

Food today:

rice cakes x3-105
tomato soup-200
peach-65
s/f pudding-60

Arby's sandwich-820

chinese food
orange chicken-395
bourbon street chicken-380
fried rice-333

Total-2358
 
Lisa what can I say... it scares the living shit out of me.. I have been chubby since I was 9.. I got molested when I was 8 and never wanted to be skinny again.. I didn't know it then but now I have been able to understand my issues. I have learned to cope with the abuse in my life and truly am a happier person. I made it to 149 for like 2 seconds..:smilielol5: when my son turned 1 which was september 2006 by september 2008 I was 200 pounds.. I obviously can't deal with almost being skinny.. It freaked me the fuck out.. Now It's 2009 and I'm at 176.8 and I hope and pray that I never ever get higher than this again.. I am truly trying to understand that I deserve this lifestyle.. I do deserve it.. I get scared though with all the attention especially from husbands, even if they don't want me.. I fear it.. I think cuz I got molested by an uncle who was married with kids.. I'm kinda fucked somewhere in my brain... :Angel_anim: I'm so happy with myself though Lisa.. This year I truly feel I have found myself again.. I wake up happy.. I go to sleep happy.. I smile and crack jokes all day.. I think I will make it and you will too.. It's learning how to accept what we have gone through and forgiving ourselves.. Theres' something that's keeping you satisfied where you are.. If you find what is really keeping there and can fix that problem I think you can make it to your goal..:beating: Regardless we are all on this together and we will do this.:beating:. Side note I don't think you should be peeling so many potatoes.. It sure as hell is way to many carbs... Start storing less carbs in your freezer personally.. and only my opinion...
 
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Wow, I was molested too as a child, when I was 6 by my stepbrother. Amazingly I worked past it as an adult but I think it was a big part of why I kept the weight on as a kid. In fact we moved to California and away from him when I was about 13 and miraculously the weight started coming off. He moved down there and funny how my weight went up. As an adult though I really think I'm afraid of being thin because it's completely foreign. Also having pcos even when I tried before, losing weight was friggin horribly difficult. I told doctors time and time again for years something was wrong and they all just blew me off. But I knew it shouldn't have been that hard to lose weight with what I was doing at times. Now I'm not trying half as hard and doing awesome since I got treatment for the pcos and my insulin resistance.

And thanks for the advice on the pototoes but don't worry, there's method to my madness :D I have a hubby who wants potatoes at every meal practically so I made these ahead in small servings so in fact I didn't always HAVE to have them with him. Now if I'm making dinner I can toss some in the oven for him and make some veggies or salad for me. I still do eat alot of regular food though and think that's part of why I'm doing so well. I'm finally off that diet roller coaster and learning to eat normally and balanced. I still have screw ups but by doing this and not really having any off limits foods I'm not feeling deprived or the need to binge or quit for months at a time. This is the first time in my life I've ever lost weight and been content at the same time, it's so weird.
 
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hi lisa...i hate hate hate peeling potatos...it was one thing when i was a kid that i always had to do for dinner....

i know how you feel about the arby's thing...i did that with panera bread, thought i made a great choice and when i looked up the calories, it was the worst...but at least i know for next time what a better choice is.....this diet stuff is hard work...

hope your sunday goes well

Kare
 
So sorry to hear about that Lisa and Ivette, what a horrible thing to happen. This is totally way off topic but do you believe there IS anyway to protect your child sometimes? I mean, these were 2 trusted family members. In hindsight, is there anything the parent can do to prevent this when its not some stranger and the parent trusts the evil person? I have a 3 year old daughter..
 
What's great about this Arby's episode is that you're familiarizing yourself with calorie amounts and not falling for the "healthy" BS. Your conscious of what you're eating. Most Americans are not and that's why a good many of us are overweight. When I go to McD's I only get the hamburger (no cheese) and small fries, then I usually tear most of the top bread off the burger. I know the calorie count is around 500 calories with that meal. For breakfast there I get the Egg McMuffin for 300 calories. This is usually the extent of my fast food though because NYC has so many local delis and restaurants (thousands actually). What's great in NYC is that, if the restaurant has more than 15 or 20 restaurants nation-wide, then it must post the calories RIGHT ON THE MENU, even a menu board like at McD's, so you see the calories right in your face. Unfortunately, most of the restaurants are not chains so you dont get to see the cals..

My H also must have a TON of carbs for his dinner. A usually throw on some rice since it takes nothing but throwing the rice and water and butter in the pot and letting it simmer for 20 mins. I used to eat it too but lately I've been making less, just enough for him and the baby, and eating brocolli w/ cheddar cheese instead. The broc w/ cheese is quite yummy!

TTYL :)
 
AngelicaHope said:
ahhhhh she is sooooo daggum cute!!!!
do you ever get the urge to squeeze the life out of adorable things?!?
>_> thats how i am feeling right now >=D i just want to hug her soooo hard!!!
hehe... jk jk lol... i do squeeze my goats though... just cant help it...
i love 'em!
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Woops somehow in posting last night I missed yours! Saw it this morning, lol. And yes I hug the crap out of her ALL the time....and pat/spank her cute little butt, lol. And kiss her on her forehead till she trieto get away....well the cats try to but she doesn't....she just tries to kiss back, lol. She's seriously like a live cuddly snuggly teddybear and her personality is so loving, she just loves everybody and it pours out of her :)
 
Karebare said:
hi lisa...i hate hate hate peeling potatos...it was one thing when i was a kid that i always had to do for dinner....

i know how you feel about the arby's thing...i did that with panera bread, thought i made a great choice and when i looked up the calories, it was the worst...but at least i know for next time what a better choice is.....this diet stuff is hard work...

hope your sunday goes well

Kare
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Thanks karebare, I saw it the same way. We've pretty much avoided the fast food for the most part but in this situation my only other choice was go hungry. So I did see it as a learning experience. And another thing, I swear I'm going to learn to make my OWN CHINESE FOOD!!! I'm so tired of having to guess the calories but also I'm tired of making the splurge and having it be a disappointment. I'm betting I can find some recipes for the sauces I like and do it on chicken without all that breading and be just as happy.
 
Blancita said:
So sorry to hear about that Lisa and Ivette, what a horrible thing to happen. This is totally way off topic but do you believe there IS anyway to protect your child sometimes? I mean, these were 2 trusted family members. In hindsight, is there anything the parent can do to prevent this when its not some stranger and the parent trusts the evil person? I have a 3 year old daughter..
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Well in my case he wasn't really a "trusted" family member. I really think my mom and dad were being dumbasses because they left me alone with him numerous times and he was already a very troubled teen. If nothing else they knew he tormented the crap out of me. So my advice in my case is I would only leave my child alone with trusted adults. I mean even if they weren't thinking he'd do THAT he could have just as easily burned the house down while they were gone. I'm lucky though that it was mild compared to what some people go through and I honestly feel I've worked though it. My husband helped me through just talking to him when we first got together and it was a very healing experience. Not sure what he said but I'm really ok. Problem is even though it's not an issue now with the weight, I've been heavy for so long that I have other issues I'm having to deal with...like the fact being thin is completely foreign. I think I'm doing pretty good breaking alot of old habits though, slowly but surely. Makes a difference getting help from people here who are having success or have done it already instead of listening to societies stupid ideas of what you have to do. Basically make yourself as uncomfortable and miserable as possible and then you will lose weight is how I was programmed. "If the diet isn't strict and nearly impossible it's not going to work"...thank goodness I finally got out of that mess, lol.
 
Oh and the rice idea is great...in fact coincidentally I just bought two little containers that are individual servings and heat up in minutes for me. Can't really get hubby to eat alot of rice though. He's really dead set on being meat and potatoes ...sometimes I can get away with some noodle roni but that's still the same carbs. The other night I did steak, potatoes and carrots and he asked me what the hell were those there for, the carrots, lol. He's never said anything like that before about veggies so I thought it was funny. I guess I'm enabling him too in a way but it's gonna have to be his choice, I can't force him. And right now he's not eating fast food, even if he is having potatoes almost every day. He's like a big picky kid about food so I'm easing him into healthier eating gradually :)
 
I forgot all about the adding friends thing here until I got a friendship request this morning :X. So I sent a bunch out this morning...I'll have to finish later though cuz I know so many awesome people now, lol. I get so focused on tryin to get around to everyone that I forget about the rep thing half the time too. In fact people left me notes in the rep thing that I didn't see before it dropped down...anyone know how to see older ones?
 
douknowjello said:
Oh and the rice idea is great...in fact coincidentally I just bought two little containers that are individual servings and heat up in minutes for me. Can't really get hubby to eat alot of rice though. He's really dead set on being meat and potatoes ...sometimes I can get away with some noodle roni but that's still the same carbs. The other night I did steak, potatoes and carrots and he asked me what the hell were those there for, the carrots, lol. He's never said anything like that before about veggies so I thought it was funny. I guess I'm enabling him too in a way but it's gonna have to be his choice, I can't force him. And right now he's not eating fast food, even if he is having potatoes almost every day. He's like a big picky kid about food so I'm easing him into healthier eating gradually :)
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My advice for stubborn hubby: When he complains about your food, and what YOU make for dinner... tell him to get is ass off of the video games and make his own dinner. And you can have the healthy meals you want. Its not fair for him to complain about a meal that you make for him. he should be thanking you for anything you make him.
 
I guess I made him sound bad, he doesn't really complain. But I know what makes him happy and what he likes. I can tell if he doesn't like something and it's a waste of food to make it, plus I like to make him happy. And seriously as long as he doesn't leave his sweets and crap out I'm good. I don't see any reason why if I'm eating balanced with fruits and veggies I can't have a normal dinner in moderate proportions. I'm getting really good though at having a main dish and different sides available for me if I'm short on calories. And hey....I fixed brussel sprouts for him the other day and not for me. Those are healthy but I HATE them so yea...couldn't have gagged them down. He loves the yucky things. And peas...I like cold peas, pea soup...but just to eat them as a veggie isn't too appetizing to me. So regardless of how healthy we're eating I'm still gonna fix stuff for him he likes that I don't and vice versa. I just gotta stay away from the fast food which I have been for the most part. Yesterday just cemented that though. I'm enjoying getting my freezer cooking done again cuz with all the staple foods made up ahead it leaves me time to be creative in the kitchen. Gonna have to try Stacy's healthy pizza recipe soon :)
 
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douknowjello said:
I forgot all about the adding friends thing here until I got a friendship request this morning :X. So I sent a bunch out this morning...I'll have to finish later though cuz I know so many awesome people now, lol. I get so focused on tryin to get around to everyone that I forget about the rep thing half the time too. In fact people left me notes in the rep thing that I didn't see before it dropped down...anyone know how to see older ones?
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I dont think you can which sucks!!!

bmohearn said:
My advice for stubborn hubby: When he complains about your food, and what YOU make for dinner... tell him to get is ass off of the video games and make his own dinner. And you can have the healthy meals you want. Its not fair for him to complain about a meal that you make for him. he should be thanking you for anything you make him.
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HEH, I do agree here to a point and he should be eating veggies and or eating healthier:)LOL...That is kinda my attitude towards the kids, I make it you eat it, Im not a short order cook and you need your veggies whether ya want them or not:)

douknowjello said:
I guess I made him sound bad, he doesn't really complain. But I know what makes him happy and what he likes. I can tell if he doesn't like something and it's a waste of food to make it, plus I like to make him happy. And seriously as long as he doesn't leave his sweets and crap out I'm good. I don't see any reason why if I'm eating balanced with fruits and veggies I can't have a normal dinner in moderate proportions. I'm getting really good though at having a main dish and different sides available for me if I'm short on calories. And hey....I fixed brussel sprouts for him the other day and not for me. Those are healthy but I HATE them so yea...couldn't have gagged them down. He loves the yucky things. And peas...I like cold peas, pea soup...but just to eat them as a veggie isn't too appetizing to me. So regardless of how healthy we're eating I'm still gonna fix stuff for him he likes that I don't and vice versa. I just gotta stay away from the fast food which I have been for the most part. Yesterday just cemented that though. I'm enjoying getting my freezer cooking done again cuz with all the staple foods made up ahead it leaves me time to be creative in the kitchen. Gonna have to try Stacy's healthy pizza recipe soon :)
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Im not sure you mkae him out to sound bad but he should appraciate you makin him dinner and shouldnt complain abt what is on his plate.The thing is we all take your words in the context we read them in right:)I can see Brandy's point.

I love brussel sprouts and when I eat dinner, i usually have a tiny amount of meat and the rest of my plate is beggies maybe a lil bit of potato or rice but im takin like 1/4 cup at the most.It is amazing how much my food intake has come down...

Balance is good and moderation and so are fruits and veggies.Hubby whould be having them as well.However maybe once you start getting that weight off, start looking lots better, feeling lots better and having tons more confidence he will want to join you in your healthy life style...

I cant remeber your off days, i believe our schedules are opposite.It would be nice if we could chat sometime today:)I enjoy chatting with you:hug2:
 
omgosh girl if you come up with some healthier recipes for chinese....
you MUST post them!!! i love chinese... but daggum, could it be any
worse for you?!?! =P
 
Hi Lisa! New hear to your journal, but I just wanted to stop in and say Hi! Fab Job on the dinner planning and weight loss, and props on the walk to the store to buy some headphones! Haha I know i prolly would have just gotten into my car.

I also play WoW unfortunately haha I just got into it a couple of months ago, because my boyfriend played and I had also played another game that was similar called Lineage II. I defintely know what you mean about it taking over your life, and hopefully when I reach 80 it wont suck my life down with raids and battlegrounds and such! Defitnetely makes a more sedentary lifestyle, but its something that helps keep my mind off things--so its a give and take situation.

Another thing chinese food is totally one of my vices--Sesame chicken and cream cheese wontons *DEATH OF ME* Lol I actually will sometimes try and make my homeade version of sesame chicken, but I doubt its any better. I take 3 boneless skinless chicken breasts cut up into bite size hunks and dip them in egg wash, bread them with bread crumbs/flour and then fry them in canola oil. I usually buy a jarred sauce, because I just cant get the flavor right in mine, and then top it with some brown rice. Not amazing for you, but I notice it fills me up much more than fast food chinese food. Ive also baked the chicken instead of frying which would help with fat!

Hope to see u post soon!

-Mariah
 
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