Lena's diary
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Curvie Girlie
New member
LENA, fuck yeah!!! 
Intermediate Yoga is the way to go!!!! 
Glad you're enjoying yourself and feeling better--in addition to the great workout of Yoga is the inner peace and contentment that follows. Enjoy!
Intermediate Yoga is the way to go!!!! Glad you're enjoying yourself and feeling better--in addition to the great workout of Yoga is the inner peace and contentment that follows. Enjoy!
it was nice
thanx it isGood to hear your motivation is still up where it belongs! Nice.
and its getting stronger hehenow i talked to a lot of people and some say it does good some say it doesn't. i talked to ivona, my dance instructor and she said that she got better definition in her muscles from it, and a strong body. the secret is in challenging yourself always for the better. i do notice a difference...but i think its also from the combinations that i do with pilates and dancing. however the best benefit for me is that i am less anxious, i eat less AND my attitude towards me and towards the world is changing towards the positive. so i highly recommend it.
LENA, fuck yeah!!!
Glad you're enjoying yourself and feeling better--in addition to the great workout of Yoga is the inner peace and contentment that follows. Enjoy!
yep i agree with ya
intermediate is definitely better for me. i sweat and i work hard...plus i challenge myself every time. when i started i couldn't do for example the cobry pose, or the exalted warrior to triangle pose but now i can and i am trying to go deeper into it each time. and that goes for all of them.update on my week:
so i'm back at work. fortunately the dean's secretary is back so i can do my own stuff...including posting here more lol.
the week was nice as well as the weekend. phisically this is the first day i feel somewhat better. i didn't go to my yogalates class on saturday because i had high fever and really wasn't into working out. however i did walk in the morning for an hour (brisk walk - before the fever) and i did light yoga in the evening. that made me feel a little better but i didn't want to push myself. still i was sweating a lot...both after the walk and after yoga. probably due to fever.
yesterday i spend the entire day relaxing, playing video games lol...i play World of Warcraft and meet up with bf in the realm hahaha then i loot the monsters and he kills them talk about partnership 
today i have the dance class and i can't wait...i really enjoy it. i even practiced the choreography yesterday HAHA!!!
hope you all are doing well
Lena
so i'm back at work. fortunately the dean's secretary is back so i can do my own stuff...including posting here more lol.
the week was nice as well as the weekend. phisically this is the first day i feel somewhat better. i didn't go to my yogalates class on saturday because i had high fever and really wasn't into working out. however i did walk in the morning for an hour (brisk walk - before the fever) and i did light yoga in the evening. that made me feel a little better but i didn't want to push myself. still i was sweating a lot...both after the walk and after yoga. probably due to fever.
yesterday i spend the entire day relaxing, playing video games lol...i play World of Warcraft and meet up with bf in the realm hahaha
then i loot the monsters and he kills them talk about partnership today i have the dance class and i can't wait...i really enjoy it. i even practiced the choreography yesterday HAHA!!!
hope you all are doing well
Lena
felici
Well-known member
Yeah! That makes so much sense.
Sorry about you being sick - that's happened more than once recently hasn't it? I hope you're really over it now.
cinderelly
New member
HaHaHa to WOW...Great partnership indeed
I got your pm, thanx by the way I care about you ALOT as well and will respnd when I have some more time.
Sorry I havent been around for awhile, I do always drop in and read just dont always post.
Im so happy that all is falling into place for you and your loving your exercise routine and what you are doing
Yoga is so benefictial in so many ways.
As far as childs pose...you can open up your hips and have your legs spread out further so you can go into the pose easier, makes any sence?This allows you to get your bum back futrther and lower.When I wsa talking yoga classes that was what she told me I could do.SO i do it for some of the poses I have a bit of a harder time with on the floor.
YOU ARE A SWEETHEART AND I LOVE YOU LENA
Great partnership indeedI got your pm, thanx by the way I care about you ALOT as well and will respnd when I have some more time.
Sorry I havent been around for awhile, I do always drop in and read just dont always post.
Im so happy that all is falling into place for you and your loving your exercise routine and what you are doing
Yoga is so benefictial in so many ways.
As far as childs pose...you can open up your hips and have your legs spread out further so you can go into the pose easier, makes any sence?This allows you to get your bum back futrther and lower.When I wsa talking yoga classes that was what she told me I could do.SO i do it for some of the poses I have a bit of a harder time with on the floor.
YOU ARE A SWEETHEART AND I LOVE YOU LENAcerella 
love you too hon
listen ya'all its a sabotage...DAMN
This is not so much food related but it is life related or mind related or ME related for that matter so in the end it WILL become about food because hey...that's how my life has always been turning.
I didn't have such a good day yesterday...it was all good at work, in the afternoon and in dance class. the food was good too. but i wasn't. I stopped sabotaging myself when it comes to food yes but not when it comes to my relationship apprently.
some of you know that me and goran broke up 2 years ago. i was devastated. we were apart for 10 months, i regained myself back, became new me and after ten months he came back into my life with promises that he will do everything to change and be better. and he has done all the right things since then. he loves me, he appreciates me, he think watching me do my daily things is the best activity in the world. and i love him back. all good. BUT...in few months time we plan on moving in. the situation financially is not so good for me yet, and now with his family debts is not for him either. and i got scared that he might bail. so in every single of our conversations i mention how will have to try hard when he comes and that he won't be able to sit around and yada yada. and i say that to a hard working man who has been saving money ever since i got back from budapest so that once he comes he can pay the rest of my debt.
yesterday i did the same...and that pushed him..and he reacted. and good that he did because i don't know how long i would have kept it going. we ended the conversation ok but i was tossing and turning all night thinking about things he said. and then i realized. I AM TRYING TO MAKE HIM GIVE UP ON ME. so that i can once for all prove to myself that i am not worthy of being happy.
and now i'm angry at myself. because i don't want to let such a good man out of my fingers. and i will talk to him about it in few days time after we both calm down.
despite the fact that i tried to sabotage my relationship i became aware of it. thanx to him mostly but hopefully i will stop sabotaging myself.
OK now i got that out of my system. i will weigh in tomorrow. i didn't get a chance this morning because i was in a hurry.
love you too honlisten ya'all its a sabotage...DAMN
This is not so much food related but it is life related or mind related or ME related for that matter so in the end it WILL become about food because hey...that's how my life has always been turning.
I didn't have such a good day yesterday...it was all good at work, in the afternoon and in dance class. the food was good too. but i wasn't. I stopped sabotaging myself when it comes to food yes but not when it comes to my relationship apprently.
some of you know that me and goran broke up 2 years ago. i was devastated. we were apart for 10 months, i regained myself back, became new me and after ten months he came back into my life with promises that he will do everything to change and be better. and he has done all the right things since then. he loves me, he appreciates me, he think watching me do my daily things is the best activity in the world. and i love him back. all good. BUT...in few months time we plan on moving in. the situation financially is not so good for me yet, and now with his family debts is not for him either. and i got scared that he might bail. so in every single of our conversations i mention how will have to try hard when he comes and that he won't be able to sit around and yada yada. and i say that to a hard working man who has been saving money ever since i got back from budapest so that once he comes he can pay the rest of my debt.
yesterday i did the same...and that pushed him..and he reacted. and good that he did because i don't know how long i would have kept it going. we ended the conversation ok but i was tossing and turning all night thinking about things he said. and then i realized. I AM TRYING TO MAKE HIM GIVE UP ON ME. so that i can once for all prove to myself that i am not worthy of being happy.
and now i'm angry at myself. because i don't want to let such a good man out of my fingers. and i will talk to him about it in few days time after we both calm down.
despite the fact that i tried to sabotage my relationship i became aware of it. thanx to him mostly but hopefully i will stop sabotaging myself.
OK now i got that out of my system. i will weigh in tomorrow. i didn't get a chance this morning because i was in a hurry.
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cinderelly
New member
*UGH sorry hun, old habits die hard and i think we obviously do these things self consciously, tha tis my prob I believe
I caught myself self sabotaging today and i dealt with it and am glad i noticed it and stopped it.
Im also glad that you noticed it with help and are dealing with it and have dealt with it
I caught myself self sabotaging today and i dealt with it and am glad i noticed it and stopped it.
Im also glad that you noticed it with help and are dealing with it and have dealt with it
Curvie Girlie
New member
Lena! I kept missing this diary, glad I did some searching, I thought you were just not around!
Hey--you did great, recognizing this
OK? You know you deserve it. Just breathe, relax, and treat Goran well. Worry about financial obstacles when they pop up and not BEFORE--a waste of time, unless you have plans to TACKLE them and not just stew over it with negativity.Get through this sweetheart.
We're here for ya! 
geoaidan
New member
That's awesome that you caught that in time. I kind of did the same thing in the beginning of my marriage with my wife. Luckily, I realized it and stopped it. I do wonder if that kind of thinking is related to weight gain? (Sabotaging self in all ways, including weight) If it is, then wow... You're definitely on your way of "fixing" that thinking.
Anyhow,
aw thanx sweety
i appreciate it. yes old habits are hard to overcome. and now it came back to food. 
MUST DEAL!!!! LOLthenx val. I will overcome it. its going to be a struggle that will probably be in me for the rest of my life. but i will have to control it somehow.Hey--you did great, recognizing this
Get through this sweetheart.
I do wonder if that kind of thinking is related to weight gain? (Sabotaging self in all ways, including weight) If it is, then wow... You're definitely on your way of "fixing" that thinking.
thenx goerge
in my case it is definitely related to weight gain. i've been sabotaging myself my whole life. i never thought of myself as being someone who deserves nice things...mainly because all of my life i had to struggle for things that i do have. and i appreciate them a lot. so having something just happen to me is a notion that i have great difficulties grasping. because i didn't fight for them, i didn't work my ass off for them. they just came. its going to take a lot of time to get that off of me.update:
well I apparently gained 1lb. i wasn't bad with food. i stuck with my daily limits, but i guess my body didn't like this week's input hehe. and i feel kinda bleh. I need some veggies i think
will check on you people later. love ya all
lena
bethann1156
New member
Hi lena...sorry to hear you were sick!
What George said is so true....I could so relate to the sabotage issue...I do that too. I think that a lot of it is rooted in fear. We are more comfortable in what we know, even though it may not be a good thing for us...we know it and we fear the unknown. So out of that fear, we fail to act.
Hope you are having a good day! *hug*
What George said is so true....I could so relate to the sabotage issue...I do that too. I think that a lot of it is rooted in fear. We are more comfortable in what we know, even though it may not be a good thing for us...we know it and we fear the unknown. So out of that fear, we fail to act.
Hope you are having a good day! *hug*
hi all thanx for your comments and support. love ya
the week turned out to be both good and bad if that's at all possible lol. i became pretty negative about things but i guess talking about it openly does make a difference. my friends and goran were there for me and kinda forced me into thinking positive. i started worrying and i lost focus from the good stuff.
since tuesdaymost of my exercise was yoga oriented, and i don'tmind that...i needed to balance myself both physically and mentally. on power yoga class we did pretty hard stuff lol...and i definitely see how one day i will be able to do all that shit. its my stomach that's getting in the way most of the time hehe. but slow steps.
today i have yogalates class. i have some kind of cold and i can't breath very good through my nose but i will still try hehe. i need some extra core exercises. who knows maybe i'll sneak into the dance class afterwards. we'll see
i will catchup with you people. i am sorry i've been a bit MIA these past few days. i was just kinda distracted by my insecurities. fortunately no binging, and no bad food choices. i even turned down pizza yesterday and instead had polenta with bit of gorgonzola and piece of turkey breast fillet. even though its not low on calories i consider it to be better food choice so i'm proud of myself.
i wish you all a great weekend.
thanx for your comments and support. love yathe week turned out to be both good and bad if that's at all possible lol. i became pretty negative about things but i guess talking about it openly does make a difference. my friends and goran were there for me and kinda forced me into thinking positive. i started worrying and i lost focus from the good stuff.
since tuesdaymost of my exercise was yoga oriented, and i don'tmind that...i needed to balance myself both physically and mentally. on power yoga class we did pretty hard stuff lol...and i definitely see how one day i will be able to do all that shit. its my stomach that's getting in the way most of the time hehe. but slow steps.
today i have yogalates class. i have some kind of cold and i can't breath very good through my nose but i will still try hehe. i need some extra core exercises. who knows maybe i'll sneak into the dance class afterwards. we'll see
i will catchup with you people. i am sorry i've been a bit MIA these past few days. i was just kinda distracted by my insecurities. fortunately no binging, and no bad food choices. i even turned down pizza yesterday and instead had polenta with bit of gorgonzola and piece of turkey breast fillet. even though its not low on calories i consider it to be better food choice
so i'm proud of myself. i wish you all a great weekend.
felici
Well-known member
You really have something to be proud of - staying on track while you've been dealing with these negatives going on. It sounds like the yoga has been a big help - I guess you have settled nicely into the groove you need when it comes to your attitudes to food. Congratulations on your week!
cinderelly
New member
IM SO HAPPY FOR YOU