Keeping Myself Accountable

[Lisa Wiles]

This is my first day of this diary, and I am really hoping that it helps keep me accountable of the decisions I make and the results of them.


I am hoping September will be a very positive month for me. My best friends from high school are getting married on October 10th, and I am really striving to get back to a comfortable weight by then. I would love to be back to my high school weight, but that is about 20 lbs less than I am now, and in a month that may be too high an expectation.


My main problem is this...I am not 100% uncomfortable with how I look now. I mean I am, I hate that I have gained 20 lbs since high school and sometimes I look in the mirror and am totally disgusted. But then other times I put on an outfit and think I look good and I don't have a problem with my body at all. Those times, while great, really affect my self-discipline when dieting. I know I need to eat better and exercise, just to be healthy if nothing else, but when I get a craving for something bad, I just think "I'm not that bad, one cheat won't hurt" and then I fall into the downward spiral. I want to change, but I am being complacent and losing focus. My fear is that this will go on too long, and once I am 100% uncomfortable in my own skin, it will be a thousand times more difficult to make a change.


So September is it. I am starting the month determined to make a change. Stop drinking soda. Stop eating fast food so often. Get my butt to a gym. I started today craving chocolate chip muffins and a Dr. Pepper (sadly, that is my normal breakfast), but opted for a Berry Fulfilling Jamba Juice instead. I finished it, and still want the muffins, but I will not let myself go get them. It's all a process, I suppose. I imagine 30 days from now I probably won't think twice about chocolate at 6am =)


Any feedback and support is greatly appreciated. If I know that someone is there, semi-keeping track of my progress, maybe I will be more likely to hold myself to the plan.

 

[PLB]

Hey Lisa, welcome to the forum!


In your case, it sounds like starting a diary of your food intake and exercise would be a good way to keep you accountable! It might even be a good idea to jot down your moods, especially when you're eating something that you don't think you should be eating... You might find that there is a connection between your moods and the types of foods you choose to eat.


Good luck, I can't wait to hear about your progress!

 

[fortyfour]

HI and welcome Lisa.


I am always astonished by americans and how almost everything they eat comes in a packet with a name that doesn't sound like food at all. However, whatever a jamba juice is, are you sure its a good enough breakfast. Perhaps if you ate something with some complex low GI carbs you wouldn't still be craving the muffins (which also have complex carbs though refined so not so good as well as a ton of fat and sugar).


Although because of mood issues, i am having my own struggles lately, when i was in a more upbeat mode, i find that plainer food, 0 less salty, sweet, fatty - foods satisfy without making me want to keep on eating. But you do need to eat enough calories to avoid setting yourself up for weight cycling. Read some other threads. There's lots of info on the forum about healthy ways to diet.


If you read the beginning of my thread it might resonate with you. Don't read the end because although i did achieve my goal weight, i've had some emotional crises and gone back up. But i am trying to hold on and am not giving up. Losing weight is a process, often quite personal and individual. We all have to find what works best for ourselves but its good to be open to what others are doing.