Journey to Knowing

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I had never heard of Edgar's Mission so looked up. It has been surprisingly cold this Winter, but as Amy said it's big time for us, but nothing like the cold I experienced in the US & I wasn't there in the heart of winter. Brrr! I don't cope well with the cold!
 
Can't wait to visit your country one day.

I did not exercise today. The higher fat intake last week, which is right in line with keto macros, has once again caused bleeding where there should not be bleeding. I felt fine to exercise but decided to rrr on the side of not doing more damage. I've spent the majority of the day packing to go to my dad's house. And cleaning a little.

I'm worried about the cats but they'll be fine. I'm worried about my ability to get to work, work all day, and then drive another four hours after work in rush hour which may turn into six hours. I'm worried about my intake and exercise. I'm worried I'll tell my father off at some point. But everything's fine.
 
That sounds horribly demanding, CrowFeather. And I hadn't heard of fat intake causing bleeding. :( As far as you can - I don't know how much of this load is avoidable - look after yourself, in all ways. (To quote Cate's epigram: "Self-care is not selfish!")
 
Wasn't high fat but the macros were high perectage intake....40%+ and carbs werearound 20%. Actual numbers were well within my normal daily allowance. But my body needs a more balanced macro percentage. I try for c 40, p 30, f 3p.
 
Survived a very long week at my dad's. Not gonna weigh until Saturday. Wanted to go to gym tonight but had to work late. Oh well. Tomorrow is an 18 hr day into the office.
 
Yep. Probably better than it's been.

Over 300 pounds of expired food moved out, small pantry organized, the massive pile of crap in the middle of the kitchen gone, and 3 of12 cabinets cleaned and organized. Two truckloads of non-food garbage taken to the dump. We also took mom's hearing aids and tech to the audiologist for someone who can't afford them and we looked at small rvs for Dad all while i worked 8 hours each day. Overall not too bad of a week.

At least he won't call me lazy again.
 
Took until last night for me to start self care stuff. That's not a good sign. I am in so much pain body-wide that I haven't been back to the gym. I also didn't make it to the office this week. That means two long days next week and my dad will be here Friday and Saturday night. Blah.

I'm trying to get my eating back. Not hungry and subsisting on lime popsicles and kodiak power flapjacks.
 
That isn't good. You really must take care of yourself. Lime popsicles & Kodiak power flapjacks? WT? You need food. Real food. Don't do this to yourself xoxo
 
Started back at the gym Monday. I've lost most conditioning so 30 minutes, low rpm. I am in the office tomorrow so another week before I go to water aerobics but will start swimming Friday. Slowly getting my eating on track. Still don't feel like eating. It's so strange how that results in weight gain.
 
I can finally walk again without pain that makes me cry. Every now and then the feet cramp up but it's bearable. I bought a bunch of food yesterday...whole food that I need to prepare. I'll prep tomorrow and Wednesday and should have food for the next 8 days or so. That'll feel good.

I made some life decisions this past week that seem to have freed up a lot of energy. Feels like it may last. It's been a hard two weeks. A friend who I was chatting with every day and helping to prepare to build a house and move to the mountains abruptly stopped talking to me. The old saying what goes around comes around hits home. I've done this twice justifying my actions by saying both people couldn't communicate or get my reasons so why expend my energy. When I called and asked why the change, she basically wrote me off and I got the feeling she didn't think I'd get it and she didn't want to bother. She hadn't even told me she wasn't staying at my house this past weekend.

This hits home my inability to maintain any kind of relationship or friendship. I finally relaxed and allowed my authentic self to be visible and boom. Bye bye. To hell with it. Decisions made.

On a more positive note, since there's no way I'll be prepared to do a multiday backpacking trip for my birthday, I'm going to nyc to see jagged little pill. A not-close, never-to-be-close, friend wanted to go too and was able to get the seat next to me. Since she's going, I'm staying 2 nights instead of up and back in one day. Should be fun.

I start back w the pool on Thursday. Haven't been since August.
 
I'm glad you are able to walk again with less pain. Swimming will be good for you. Hope you enjoy the show & your visit to NYC.
 
Hello, Crowfeather! Ages since I've seen your name here - it sounds like you've been through some rough times. :(
Great about buying some good food that you can cook yourself, and getting back to swimming and walking without constant pain. When is the New York trip? I hope your not-close friend is at least a good travelling companion!
 
@aiminglow hey there! The trip is in march. I'm hoping the same. She has an illness that makes doing too much not doable so we should be okay. My only concern is the tiny room we'll be in.

Slept about 30 hours between Tuesday evening and Thursday morning. Got some doctor who time in there between sleeps. It's nice having healthy meals in the fridge. I made 12 meals Tues. Oh and the friend who stopped communicating, she and I talked for an hour yesterday. Not sure where that is for me.

Back to work.
 
Sounds like (what with the healthy food ready to hand, and Doctor Who, and the friend back in communication and most of all - lots of sleep) that things are on the up! All the best for work, as well! :)
 
CrowFeather said:
Oh and the friend who stopped communicating, she and I talked for an hour yesterday. Not sure where that is for me
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Hope it works out for the best, holidays can be hard on relationships, but they are important.
 
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