Journey, Not A Destination

People take debating as personal attacks or even sometimes revert to personal attacks.

I don't even mind that. It shows their ignorance. They might as well come out and say, "I don't know what I am talking about and you win" when they resort to personal attacks.

It's other things that bother me. Like moving goal posts in a debate, cherry picking, using fallacious reasoning, avoiding the topic..... it's like some people really can't comprehend.
 
People hear what they want to hear...and tune out everything else. My ex does this; freaking annoying. He thinks he is right, so it mattered not what I said. Even when I showed him proof, he ignored it. It's like they have a track playing over and over in their head of what they believe/think, and they can't really hear you.
 
People hear what they want to hear...and tune out everything else. My ex does this; freaking annoying. He thinks he is right, so it mattered not what I said. Even when I showed him proof, he ignored it. It's like they have a track playing over and over in their head of what they believe/think, and they can't really hear you.

Exactly.

This is rampant across the various health/fitness forums on the web. Not this site, thankfully. Occasionally here, but it's expected I guess. Some forums though, I don't even like visiting anymore.
 
Yea, I think I'd like to see you do more than that. At least for a bit. It's good to "reward" your body a bit after it's been getting "kicked" for so long.

More than what? Did you mean no more than that?

2500 cals would put you between 10-11 calories per pound. I'd think going up closer to 12 would be better. Even though the physiological survival adaptations don't occur as dynamically when one is carrying a lot of excess weight (relatively speaking of course), they do still happen. Eating close to maintenance if not above is a good idea for anyone every once in a while. I think your trip to visit your son proved that.

How many cals did you eat out there on average? Do you know?
I think I was putting away about 3,000 calories a day then. But, I was also working my ass off!

Maybe start at 12 cals per pound and really monitor weight on a daily basis. Don't fret if a pound or two creep on. Acute fluctuations matter little. As we get towards the middle of the break, we will start dropping them down closer to 10-11. Not a drastic number of calorie change anyhow.

Glad to see the weight is still coming down.

OK, I'll try that. Psychologically, it's very hard to accept anything that might put some pounds back on, but you're more experienced (at doing it right, at least) than I am. That would be around 2,750 calories a day.
 
Do they choose what they want to hear? Does it stem from cracks in our education system?

Well, if adults today can't argue from a logical point of view, wait until we reap what we have sown with "No Child Left Behind." This obsession with standardized testing is creating a nation of data entry clerks. My wife is one of the very few teachers who hasn't given up social studies and art in order to get her kids ready for the testing. It's a national tragedy that few know anything about.
 
More than what? Did you mean no more than that?

Nope. I meant more than your original number of 2500.


I think I was putting away about 3,000 calories a day then. But, I was also working my ass off!

Still, you probably weren't expending as much as you do on a normal schedule of lifting and exercise.... and 3000 played out nicely for you in the end. 2750 will do this time around I think. Just remember to keep track of the stats i.e., weight and measurements.



OK, I'll try that. Psychologically, it's very hard to accept anything that might put some pounds back on, but you're more experienced (at doing it right, at least) than I am. That would be around 2,750 calories a day.

Bodies need breaks. It's that simple.
 
Well, if adults today can't argue from a logical point of view, wait until we reap what we have sown with "No Child Left Behind." This obsession with standardized testing is creating a nation of data entry clerks. My wife is one of the very few teachers who hasn't given up social studies and art in order to get her kids ready for the testing. It's a national tragedy that few know anything about.

Amen to that. My fiancé is a teacher as well. The American education system is the pits, IMO.
 
I don't even mind that. It shows their ignorance. They might as well come out and say, "I don't know what I am talking about and you win" when they resort to personal attacks.

I know what you're talking about. I have my pride, but since I love to learn I always admit when I don't know something because it is only reasonable to do so. Also, I take everything people tell me with a grain of salt because I have to remember they may be misinformed or not know what they're talking about. Unfortunately I've met a lot of sociopathic liars in my day.

Hi! Thanks for the compliment! :hug2:
 
I know what you're talking about. I have my pride, but since I love to learn I always admit when I don't know something because it is only reasonable to do so. Also, I take everything people tell me with a grain of salt because I have to remember they may be misinformed or not know what they're talking about. Unfortunately I've met a lot of sociopathic liars in my day.

Hi! Thanks for the compliment! :hug2:

I love when I don't know something. Learning is one of the single most adored activities I have in my life.

And you are quite welcome. :)
 
This is what I was going to say.

I could really go on and on about this, but I will spare everyone, lol.

Morning Steve! I love the butterfly quote! Where do you get your quotes?

I have a word document loaded with quotes that I've saved from all over the place. Books, web, word of mouth, etc. Actually, it's loaded with a ton of quotes and a lot of other personal thoughts I write down. It's over 50 pages long.
 
I love when I don't know something. Learning is one of the single most adored activities I have in my life.

And you are quite welcome. :)
I think I share the love of this activity with you...

And to put it breifly, it is so frustrating when people want to argue instead of debate. To me, a conversation is an opportunity to learn something new, or at least learn something about how the other person views the world.
 
I think I share the love of this activity with you...

And to put it breifly, it is so frustrating when people want to argue instead of debate. To me, a conversation is an opportunity to learn something new, or at least learn something about how the other person views the world.

That's a rare outlook, unfortunately. And maybe I am wrong when I say that. Maybe it is isolated to the fitness community. It seems with the advent of the Internet, everyone wants to be the expert when it comes to nutrition/fitness.

Go to any forum and you will have 90 people answering 1 question with the same answers.... just so they can be heard. And how dare 1 stranger come in and post something to the contrary. You'd think he just came in and disrespected someone's wife and children.

Having an open mind and being willing to learn seems to be lost arts, at least in the fitness industry. It's quite sad.

Couple this with the love I have for debating, and it becomes doubly frustrating. Debates usually uncover the truth. You present your data, scientific and personal. I present mine. Conclusions are drawn. People agree or agree to disagree.

Anymore though, it doesn't work like this.

Rather, most of the words I type aren't even read. They only see one thing, and that is "winning" the debate. What they don't realize is that they lost the debate from the very moment they started chatting. Disregarding the true value of debate, mentioned above, and transforming into some win/lose game is futile.

This is what I feel like anymore:
 

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I see it at Dave's house with one roommate in particular.
It's so frustrating, I know, but what I am learning to do is to change the subject when a person proves to be this way.
What also bugs me is when I am having a deep conversation with someone, and another person says "you guys are bringing me down"...like being serious is a bad thing....Not AT ALL! sheesh, people are AFRAID to get down to the good stuff, I swear!

Oh, I love the cartoon!! Perfect :D
 
What also bugs me is when I am having a deep conversation with someone, and another person says "you guys are bringing me down"...like being serious is a bad thing....Not AT ALL! sheesh, people are AFRAID to get down to the good stuff, I swear!

It's so funny you mention this. I experience this often. My friends, god love them, seem so shallow. Not all of them. But a majority. And it seems to extend well past my group of friends. I assist with some local highschool sports teams on conditioning... and today's youth seems even worse.

And this is why I feel like "thinking" is a lost art. People don't seem to know how to think anymore. And when they come across someone who does know how to and likes to.... they are intimidated. Or seem to be anyhow. Why else would they try and end the conversation? Or change the subject?
 
The comic strip said it all. :D
There are too many people who think anything becomes a fact if it's just repeated often enough. The same people accept anything as a fact without ever asking why, how come, how do we know that, who said that, where did you read it, who researched it, are there other sources that say something else. They then use the "fact" to make their point and are annoyed if they're asked any of the above questions. :rolleyes:
I hope you're feeling good today. :)
Julie
 
That's a rare outlook, unfortunately. And maybe I am wrong when I say that. Maybe it is isolated to the fitness community. It seems with the advent of the Internet, everyone wants to be the expert when it comes to nutrition/fitness.
Anyone who's lost 5 lbs thinks their way is the best way and they are experts.... I don't remember the comedian that said it but there's one that said that people on atkins didn't lose weight because the diet they lost weight by pontificating on how great the diet was and how everyone should be on it - and from the atkins users I saw - it's absolutely true -it was like their own version of the hari krishnas minus the tamborines.

Anonyminity on a forum brings out the "I am always right and you're an idiot" expert mode in too many people and very few see it in themselves but can easily spot it in others (and no that wasn't any kind of indirect hint) Another forum I'm spending less and less time on because I've just gotten bored with it - is a forum where politics, religion and sex are the hot topics of debate... good luck trying to get anyone to see a point of view that's not like their own.

People believe what they want to believe...

Why try to end a topic? I've done it lots of time - the old expression - what's the best part of beating your head against a brick wall? It's stopping - some conversations just go nowehre it's two people talking at each other and not to each other and not listening to each other. We were blessed with two ears and one mouth - whcih means we should listen twice as much as we talk and rarely does that happen.
 
Seriously... How are things ever going to change if we can't talk....

I get the 'lets talk about how many great things there are in life...' and three minutes later, the same person is talking about something that is a total downer, more so than the previous conversation.

There are things we NEED to talk about because the topics are a reality, and people are afraid of that.
People neglecting to accept reality are everywhere, and when will they understand that this neglect is the cause for most of the things that are 'taboo' to speak of.

This conversation can go so much deeper than just 'thinking'.
I think that more people need to take responsibility for the state of the things they dont want to face.
Obviously this goes way beyond fitness, and religion(which is where I see it most often). Ignoring one hard fact makes it easier to ignore another.
 
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