Inspired, motivated, and READY!!! :)

[skkroll]

Good Morning Sarah!
I really dislike the red team too - I was confused because I thought she admitted the first week to blowing the weigh-in - I was almost positive and now she is denying it all - I guess she realized how bad it would look to everyone watching. I think her husband slacked this week in her place but no one really seemed to notice. They are for sure playing the game and have their eye on the prize.
Good food log yesterday - I have been really bad with keeping to my goals this week - all I can do is try harder and not give up! Water, water, water!

Yeah, it was funny that the girl on the red team was making all these excuses for not losing weight, then Jillian and Bob call her out and she MIRACULOUSLY loses 11 pounds! She's full of crap! I haven't been great with my goals either, but setting them is a good start whether we can fulfill them all or not, at least we have a plan and somewhat of a "structure" to keep us going! I think it's been so hard to get back to this full force because we've already come so far... the journey is almost done (as far as weight loss goes) so it doesn't feel as important to me to be so strict I guess.

-----

Today is off to a great start, and I feel wonderful already. I went to the gym this morning before my weight training class to run. I ran 3 miles. Then during class I did a lot of circuit training. My arms are so weak! They feel like jello right now! OH and I also ran my first mile in 8:50, which is good considering the pace I was running was the same pace the entire time, and I was just running at a comfortable speed.

I have class from 2:15 to 5, and at 5:15 the core complete (abs class) starts and following that is the step class! So I'm heading straight from class to the gym again because I NEED another good workout to make up for the slacking lately!

In other words... I have boyfriend drama and maybe some advice from anyone would be nice. Well everything is fine with us - nothing is wrong, we are happy, we love each other. We've been together for a little over a year and a half now. We are at 2 completely different stages in life - I'm going to school, he is working full time. So I'm at the point where I'm trying to enjoy myself and my college years, and he is at the point where he is going to be moving out on his own, wants me to live with him, wants to move on because that's where he is at. I'm not there right now. Whatever. Anyways, I haven't really been talking to him at all this week, let alone thinking about him. It's like when I'm not with him, I don't even care. And I shouldn't feel that way.
I've been having dreams about other guys lately... my mind is just not with him right now. He knew something was up and asked me yesterday.. I told him I don't know where my head is at right now but I haven't been thinking about "us" at all. I SHOULD think about my boyfriend. I SHOULD want to talk to him all the time when I'm away. I SHOULD miss him. But I don't. I love him so much, but I just don't know if I'm in love with him anymore. And I don't know if I can commit myself to him for the rest of my life as he wants me to. I'm really independent, and I like doing things for me. He is so upset right now, keeps texting me begging for me to not break up with him, saying I'm all he thinks about everyday, he would do anything for me, he can't sleep, can't stop thinking about it, his heart aches already.....
I feel bad but I DON'T KNOW. I don't want to act right now, because maybe I'm thinking too much. But I just don't feel like he is what I want. I don't know what to do

Well time for breakfast and to relax..... I'll check back later!
~ Sarah

 

[thelast20]

I think it's been so hard to get back to this full force because we've already come so far... the journey is almost done (as far as weight loss goes) so it doesn't feel as important to me to be so strict I guess.

I've been thinking the exact same thing. I was actually going to write this in your journal the other day, but didn't really know how to say it. I'm 2lbs away from my goal and therefore my body is at the size it's going to be... 2lbs is not going to change anything. I just have to keep reminding myself that now is the really hard part... I have to change the shape of my body... tone it up! I find that what worked for me before isn't working now b/c my goals are different.

-----

My arms are so weak! They feel like jello right now! OH and I also ran my first mile in 8:50, which is good considering the pace I was running was the same pace the entire time, and I was just running at a comfortable speed.

In other words... I have boyfriend drama and maybe some advice from anyone would be nice.

My arms are weak too. I find when I do the 30min shred, I can't feel my legs at all, but my arms are SCREAMING!!! I usually have to put the weights down and finish with nothing

I'm sorry to hear about the BF drama. When I started this process I started with the phycho first... I read the book "Woman's Bodies, Woman's Wisdom", and wrote in a journal the whole time to work through all my "stuff". I made my husband read my journal entries every night. He wasn't going on this journey with me and I didn't want to come out on the other side and being a different person and apart from him. We never disscussed my journal entries but it let him know where my head and heart were at so even though I was changing he was right there with me. I'm telling you this b/c the reason I did that is b/c I've heard of so many stories of woman who fall out of love with thier partners after b/c everything is different. You think differently about so many things and they just don't get it. You come out the other end a different person... a stronger person. I don't know if this is making any sense at all or helping. Sorry.

Listen to your heart... you'll know what to do
Marie

 

[chubbygirl]

Oh my god! this is the third time I am responding and keep forgetting to copy the message I write and end up losing it because it logs me out because the messages have been soo long!! How frustrating!!!
Sorry I don't have time now to write everything I wanted but to make it short - follow your heart, don't let the thought of losing a good friend make your decision - I know how it feels to hurt someone you really love and how you don't want to lose a friend but in order for you to be happy that might need to happen. It's ok to be on different pages but I think you need to be in same book - if that makes any sense.
I made sure before saying "yes" when my hunnie asked me to marry him that we had the same visions - having kids, getting a house in the country, saving money, settling down and not needing to party every weekend with buddies because those are things that are important to me and no amount of love could keep us together if he didn't want those same things.
Your years are uni are special and something you only get to do once so don't let anyone hold you back! I hope it works out for you - I really feel for you because I know how hard it can be to have that over your head. I have broken a few hearts and it's not easy by any means - just be honest with yourself and your hunnie and it will all work out in the end. best of luck

 

[mrskt20]

Believe it or not I have been in your shoes before Sarah, with my boyfriend (now husband). We dated all through high school and I broke up with him before I left for college. It was the hardest thing I have ever I had to do. But to this day, I don't regret it. We needed to grow up. We needed to experience things. He said I broke his heart and he never needed to be with anyone else to know that I was the only one for him. But I had to do what was best for me. I know that might sound selfish but I rather this happen when I was 18 instead of 25 and married and miserable. We remained good friends. It was very hard at first but got easier after a while. After a couple of years we both realized how much we missed each other and we also realized the love we had was something very special and we've been together ever since. I agree with Lisa, follow your heart. That's what I did.

 

[~Tutti~Frutti~]

I do the hour-long step class too, it's great, a really good workout!

It's good that you feel independant and want to do whats best for yourself... but whose to say you cant be with your boyfriend and still keep up that self-determination?? Or maybe you could explain to him you're not sure about getting married and ask if you can put that on hold and just take things slowly for a while whilst you work out what you want/need.

Only you can decide what you need to do at the end of the day, but think long and hard because it sounds like you have somebody who really cares about you, and they dont come along often. Just don't make any hasty decisions.

Anyways... keep up the good work food/exercise wise! You're so close to your ultimate goal. xx

 

[skkroll]

Thanks for your understanding and help girls! I know I'm still so young, and it's nice to have people that have gone through what I have already and can relate to how I'm feeling right now. I am going to see him tomorrow and we are going to talk - I told him that I'm not going to break up with him but I need him to hear me out on what I'm feeling and thinking right now. Whatever happens, happens I guess :-/

I feel really good today for how much I worked out. 3 mile run this morning, 40 minutes circuit weight training, 15 minutes abs class, and 1 hour step class - WOW! The step class was so fun... my face had sweat beading off of it... even my tummy was dripping sweat! It was such a great workout. My roommate came with me and after we went and got subs from Jimmy Johns... I ate THE WHOLE THING but I needed to fuel my body after that intense workout so I don't really feel too bad about it.

Weekend starts tomorrow for me... yay! Goodnight,
~ Sarah

 

[chubbygirl]

Good Morning Sarah,
Hope everything went ok with your sweetie last night - was hoping to get an update this morning but looks like you didn't post yesterday so that has me a little worried - I'm guessing it was a long night.
Good work out Wednesday - I am totally jealous of all those calories you burned! I need to get back to the classes - I really do miss them. If I don't hear from you have an amazing weekend - I will be the old me again next week I promise - I have to stop talking about kicking butt and kick some already! I know I can do it - I just have to keep telling myself that and do it! Hope your weigh in goes good today. Chat soon

 

[skkroll]

Hey Lisa! Thanks for checking in. I did talk with my boyfriend last night and it was a long talk... there was a little crying for both of us but he handled it better than I had expected. We ended up dropping the topic... his puppy was playing with him and he said, "Well at least I'll have you for another 12 years... maybe by that time I'll get Sarah back.." but he was taking the situation lightly. I gave Nick a hair cut and played video games with his nephew for a while so we weren't really talking or spending quality time, so after a while we snuggled and watched TV... he just started balling out of no where. I asked him what he was thinking and he said, "That I'm not going to be able to do this with you anymore." It was really sad. We were both crying a lot. I apologized to him. I still don't know what is going to happen. He knows how I feel now though, and I'm happy I got it off my chest. I'm going to let things just happen right now. Not making any decisions until I KNOW they NEED to be made!

-----

Well yesterday was alright minus the fact that when I went to the mall I decided to go to Quality Candy and buy some chocolate! UGH. I bough a piece of chunk chocolate, and 2 chocolate cashew clusters. I should not have done that. I was really bloated all day. Plus the night before that, I ended up drinking with my roommate and some friends This week just did NOT go as planned! And THAT'S why this morning I was 136.2! I knew I wouldn't see a loss. At least it was a small gain, considering I knew I messed up a lot this week.

I'm trying not to worry about it too much because I AM at the weight that I wanted to be at in the first place. I'm at a size that I feel comfortable and I LIKE how I look. I'm still going to try to get to 125 eventually but I think it's so far from me right now and IDK if I will be able to lose the weight I want to right now because I think I don't WANT it enough right now. I was SO dedicated before..... I got myself 20 pounds down from where I was.... and now I'm just stuck here and it's been this way for like 2 months now! Because I have lost that drive. I need to get it back, and I hope to get it back soon.

I have to REALLY kick ass this week and next week, because Valentine's Day is already coming up! I would really like to meet my goal - I did one day. The weekend that I was 135.2... a few days later I was 133.6 and I was SO HAPPY! But then after going to school and being gone for the week, that obviously went back up. I know I can get there..... I know how to do it.... now I just gotta DO IT!!!!

HELP ME STAY FOCUSED YOU GUYS!!! I NEED SOME NEGATIVE FEEDBACK. I NEED YOU GUYS TO TELL ME TO STOP SNACKING TO GET MY ASS TO THE GYM LIKE I USED TO... DON'T TELL ME IT'S OKAY AND I MADE GOOD CHOICES AT LEAST. I NEED A LITTLE KICK IN THE ASS! PUSH ME!!!

Thank you
~ Sarah

 

[20to10]

Hi there. You want to be pushed? I'll tell you I was at my goal weight in summer of 2008. I am now 5 stone heavier. It can happen to you. It happened with me just by small snacks, drinking, slacking on focus.

You don't want to wind up like me!! You're so close to your goal. Don't slip back pound by pound like I did. You can see pics on my profile.

 

[skkroll]

Hi there. You want to be pushed? I'll tell you I was at my goal weight in summer of 2008. I am now 5 stone heavier. It can happen to you. It happened with me just by small snacks, drinking, slacking on focus.

You don't want to wind up like me!! You're so close to your goal. Don't slip back pound by pound like I did. You can see pics on my profile.

Thank you! It is so hard to get off track with things that I didn't even realized were bringing me down before - snacking and drinking!

PS - I just weighed my 5 pound dumbells on my scale - each one weighed 5.6 pounds. I also put my 10 pound kettle bell on it, and it was 10.6 pounds. So my scale is .6 off.... so from now on I'm going to subtract .6 from what it tells me. Is that right or mabye the weights really that weight???

Well, I'm gonna say then that my weight today is 135.6 if my scale is off. So I'm going with that.

 

[20to10]

Its so hard to get off track when you've lost the weightand everyone keeps telling you how good you look. They won't notice the pound by pound increase that your scale will notice. I'm glad you found out your scale is wrong!!

I know you can make your Valentines goal!!

I'm hoping my scale is off too!

 

[chubbygirl]

Hey I'm going to check my scale tonight too! Is it possible to be off 10 pounds just kidding!
Ok I have found some motivation and it really lit a fire under my bum! I want to go to the bathroom right now and start doing jumping jacks!
I feel like my mind is in the same place as my heart now and I'm actually starting to care again instead of just saying it I am feeling it too!
I will let you know Monday what my daily goals for the week will be and no doubt I will meet them! My goal for today is to get back to the gym. Saturday's goal is to make it to Kettle Bell class and Sunday's goal will be to stay within my daily 20 WW points and NOT go over! I'm feeling really good about this! Can't wait to post on Monday my success!! Ok I got to go put these goals in my journal now. Chat Monday!

 

[thelast20]

Have you gone back and read through your own diary yet? I did a couple of days ago and found it very motivating. Might be worth a try!!

 

[skkroll]

Ok! Here are my goals for next week:

Monday - Run 3 miles before weight training class
Tuesday - Drink 100 oz. of water
Wednesday - Go to Core Complete and Step class
Thursday - Interval training

That's all for now

 

[Marathon Man]

HELP ME STAY FOCUSED YOU GUYS!!! I NEED SOME NEGATIVE FEEDBACK. I NEED YOU GUYS TO TELL ME TO STOP SNACKING TO GET MY ASS TO THE GYM LIKE I USED TO... DON'T TELL ME IT'S OKAY AND I MADE GOOD CHOICES AT LEAST. I NEED A LITTLE KICK IN THE ASS! PUSH ME!!!

You suck! Haha, feel better now?

Seriously though, I'm scheduled to run 18 miles this week and next. Think you can beat me? As my 3-year old nephew would say ... "NEVER!!!!"

But if you're happy with yourself, enjoy it and be content and find a new goal to strive towards and put your energy into, fitness realated or not.

 

[skkroll]

Have you gone back and read through your own diary yet? I did a couple of days ago and found it very motivating. Might be worth a try!!

I have done that a few times actually. It's funny how crazy I would get when I got off track - and now when I get off track, I don't even care!!! But it does help to sort of "re-live" it sometimes.

You suck! Haha, feel better now?

Seriously though, I'm scheduled to run 18 miles this week and next. Think you can beat me? As my 3-year old nephew would say ... "NEVER!!!!"

But if you're happy with yourself, enjoy it and be content and find a new goal to strive towards and put your energy into, fitness realated or not.

LOL "you suck!" that made me laugh So yes, it did make me feel better! Hmmm I might have to take you up on that 18 miles... maybe I'll do 19 just to get ahead of ya haha! I need to start running more though! I wish it was nicer outside because I would be out there all the time running!

 

[~Tutti~Frutti~]

Well I know you're not feeling great but you're already where I want to eventually be - you look great to me!! Plus all the exercise you're getting in is brill... I hope to learn to run eventually when I've lost a bit more.

Anyway... keep it up and try to think positive, you're doing great and you know it really!! The little gain is just a short blip. x

 

[2Skinny]

Hi skkroll;

I've yet to read through most of your diary but looking at your ticker, you've clearly come a long way and are overall committed to health. Congratulations on making it two thirds of the way to your goal! Your upcoming goals for this week look great.

I remember I was only 10 pounds over when my sons graduated high school and all these people came up to me at their grad, complementing me. Well, wouldn't you know, I started neglecting my regiment because I felt "I'd made it". Sometimes all the complements can actually serve to mess with our mental strength to go that last lap of the "race". So when you say you need some "negative feedback" I think I know what you mean.

I think when we get closer to goal weight, mentally, we need to focus less on the weight goal and more on the daily living goal. Because we're movig into the weight management versus weight loss phase. It's just as hard a phase, if not harder, because we see less reward on the scale. So I think it's interesting you outlined your weekly goal. It's a mental shift and it's a really important one. No doubt you've written about this in your journal and I just haven't read back far enough.

So I'm going to give you realistic feedback as opposed to negative feedback, how's that? You are on your last leg of the race. You're tired because you've worked HARD to be where you are right now. And you know you need to dig down deep inside to find the best of your resolve, the very essence of your commitment, to see this through to the end. And even then, when you get to 133, and ... 125, your life won't change, you'll still be on top of what you eat and you'll still be exercising. It's life long. That's the commitment all of us really need to make in this game. We all know it. One guy's blog I read, he'd lost over 100 pounds, and was running marathons, but he blogged a lot about his "inner fatty", the part of him that still needed constant reminders to stay on top of his game and watch caloric-input and exercise-output. I loved his blog because it speaks to the real issue, beyond weight.

All my best vibes your way for MENTAL STRENGTH in this time of your journey. Have a great week!!

 

[skkroll]

Sometimes all the complements can actually serve to mess with our mental strength to go that last lap of the "race".

So I'm going to give you realistic feedback as opposed to negative feedback, how's that? You are on your last leg of the race. You're tired because you've worked HARD to be where you are right now. And you know you need to dig down deep inside to find the best of your resolve, the very essence of your commitment, to see this through to the end. And even then, when you get to 133, and ... 125, your life won't change, you'll still be on top of what you eat and you'll still be exercising. It's life long.

Thank you SO MUCH for posting this. You are so very right. It's easy to give up or let go when you're so close - because you feel as though you've come far enough already and in a sense you have already "won." It reminds me of something Jillian Michaels says in her 30 Day Shred workout video. Something along the lines of, "You don't get to the finish line and stop; that's when you give it even more than what you started with." And this really applies to me. Even though not much is going to change when I drop these last 10 pounds, I can't sell myself short right now. I have to give it all I've got because the race ain't over yet!!!

I have my focus again and am ready to take on these next 2 weeks to make my goal. A whole month has passed by and I feel like I have really let myself go. I've stuck around the same weight - so I guess it's good that I know I will be able to maintain quite alright - but I have really been slacking. Too many cheat days. More drinking. Less exercising. I remember in the beginning when I would not go a DAY without exercising... now I can go 2 or 3! EEK!

This week is going to be exciting as I am preparing day by day goals for myself and making each daily goal different. Rather than trying to accomplish 5 specific things every day, just having one focus will be less overwhelming and much easier to commit to.

So, tomorrow is Monday and my Monday goal is to run 3 miles before my weight training class at 8:50 AM. I guess that means I better get to bed

Hope everyone had a great weekend... I'm so glad it's over and I'm truly excited for this week. It's a whole new week, a whole new month - no looking back, no more excuses, no more oh-well's.... NO MORE!

Goodnight
~ Sarah

 

[Alta818]

Hey Lisa! Thanks for checking in. I did talk with my boyfriend last night and it was a long talk... there was a little crying for both of us but he handled it better than I had expected. We ended up dropping the topic... his puppy was playing with him and he said, "Well at least I'll have you for another 12 years... maybe by that time I'll get Sarah back.." but he was taking the situation lightly. I gave Nick a hair cut and played video games with his nephew for a while so we weren't really talking or spending quality time, so after a while we snuggled and watched TV... he just started balling out of no where. I asked him what he was thinking and he said, "That I'm not going to be able to do this with you anymore." It was really sad. We were both crying a lot. I apologized to him. I still don't know what is going to happen. He knows how I feel now though, and I'm happy I got it off my chest. I'm going to let things just happen right now. Not making any decisions until I KNOW they NEED to be made!

-----

Well yesterday was alright minus the fact that when I went to the mall I decided to go to Quality Candy and buy some chocolate! UGH. I bough a piece of chunk chocolate, and 2 chocolate cashew clusters. I should not have done that. I was really bloated all day. Plus the night before that, I ended up drinking with my roommate and some friends This week just did NOT go as planned! And THAT'S why this morning I was 136.2! I knew I wouldn't see a loss. At least it was a small gain, considering I knew I messed up a lot this week.

I'm trying not to worry about it too much because I AM at the weight that I wanted to be at in the first place. I'm at a size that I feel comfortable and I LIKE how I look. I'm still going to try to get to 125 eventually but I think it's so far from me right now and IDK if I will be able to lose the weight I want to right now because I think I don't WANT it enough right now. I was SO dedicated before..... I got myself 20 pounds down from where I was.... and now I'm just stuck here and it's been this way for like 2 months now! Because I have lost that drive. I need to get it back, and I hope to get it back soon.

I have to REALLY kick ass this week and next week, because Valentine's Day is already coming up! I would really like to meet my goal - I did one day. The weekend that I was 135.2... a few days later I was 133.6 and I was SO HAPPY! But then after going to school and being gone for the week, that obviously went back up. I know I can get there..... I know how to do it.... now I just gotta DO IT!!!!

HELP ME STAY FOCUSED YOU GUYS!!! I NEED SOME NEGATIVE FEEDBACK. I NEED YOU GUYS TO TELL ME TO STOP SNACKING TO GET MY ASS TO THE GYM LIKE I USED TO... DON'T TELL ME IT'S OKAY AND I MADE GOOD CHOICES AT LEAST. I NEED A LITTLE KICK IN THE ASS! PUSH ME!!!

Thank you
~ Sarah

!!! Get UR COUCH LOVING ASS to the GYM BeaaaTCH ~~!!!! CRUNCH THAT SHIT!!! SMASH THAT ASS!!! DO YOU WANT THAT ASS TO START WHOPPING OVER THE SIDE OF THE TOILET SEAT!!!!!?!?! HUH!!!?!!.TOILET ASS HANDLES HUH!!!?!?....!!! Yeeeea didn't think so!!!...hahaha!!! YOU WORKED HARD TO GET RID OF THEM..NOW WORK FOR IT....PUT DOWN THOSE SNACKS!!!! (is that what you wanted?!! ) hahah!!!!! !!