Indian Summer's Diary

I

indiansummer

New member
I have been pondering for a while where and when my weight loss journey started/will start. So now, I guess having found this forum, today, as day one in my diary is a good place to start.

A little background, Im Kate, 22, 15stone1lb, 5foot7inches. I live in the UK, studying in Newcastle, family home in Yorkshire. I have 3 weeks left at uni til I graduate, whooo hooo!! I will be spending the summer in India, well 6 months from July there, home for Crimbo and then back out there for good I hope.

India is one of the big reasons i want to lose weight and get fit. Its hot and sticky, and with a lot of extra pounds it can be hard work. Another reason is I want to look in the mirror and like what i see. Another reason is I dont want to have to spend all day every day battling with food.

I could say alot more about my past, but as today is day one, I will start from here, if there is anything else i need to say, or anyone is interested in let me know n i'll answer, but for now i'll move to today.

I feel fat, I am fat. BUT, i also feel good and positive, I have made this decison to do something about the extra pounds, I really WANT this, and I really WILL DO THIS!!

So today, had a good lie in after working late last night. got on the scales this morning to see that I am 5lb lighter than 16days since when i last toiled with the weight loss idea. SO, felt pretty good.

Had cearel and satsumas for brekkie, and ham salad sandwich and pickled onions for lunch.

Done NO exercise whatsoever yet today, been sat about surfing the internet, watching tele n been UNBELIEVABLY LAZY, I AM SO SO LAZY. Laziness is my biggest evil, i think about exercsing lots, but get off my arse very infrequently!!

WILL DO HALF HOUR WORK OUT AT THREE PM, Watch this space!!

Actually, Laziness might not be my biggest evil, that could be binging, but so far two meals, no snacks, no snacks in the house, and no money to really go buying them. So that should be ok today.

EEEEKKKK day one here I am, with nothing exciting to say!!!

NO idea what is for dinner yet, not sure if planning is better than eating what i fancy at the time. Organisation aint my strong point either, so gonna try out the spur of the moment thing today. Dieting on a serious budget, so guess it'll be a mismatch of cupboard and freezer food, must go shopping!!

Well, bbl, after my workout, I promise!!

K xx
 
YAY 30mins workout dvd completed, was bloody hard work, I am sooo unfit I disgust myself.

Feel better for doing it actually, always do, tis jsut the getting off my ass to do it that is the difficulty, thinking about trying to add it too my morning room, but then, maybe i cant give up 30mins in bed to exercise, hmmmmm, will see!!
 
Welcome to the site. :)

Your frame of mind sounds excellent! That is the most important variable in the equation with regards to losing weight, IMO.

Sounds like you battle with yourself in terms of getting off your booty and exercising. Why don't you like exercising?

Once you answer this. Then ask these questions:

Why do I like being lazy?

Why would I like to exercise on a consistent basis?

Why would I like to stop being lazy?

List out the answers and compare. Attach emotions to the answers. May sound stupid, but sometimes the obvious ain't so obvious to your mind. Your conscious mind can be saying one thing and your subconscious mind can be directly contradicting what you are thinking.

And wouldn't you know, our subconscious minds directs all things that we decide to do.
 
Steve said:
Sounds like you battle with yourself in terms of getting off your booty and exercising. Why don't you like exercising?

Once you answer this. Then ask these questions:

Why do I like being lazy?

Why would I like to exercise on a consistent basis?

Why would I like to stop being lazy?

Hiya Steve, thanks for the welcome :)

I dont like exercising for lots of reasons really. Not a fan of being hot n sweaty, find it boring, find i cant do anything properly cos of my lack of fitness and coordination!! And, I just make excuses to do other things.

I dont think i *like* being lazy. But i am lazy because i dont pust to do things, I happily spend a day sat in the house alone on the computer or with my nose in a book, never get round to actually doing anything, and suddenly its nighttime. My energy levels are often pants too, which makes being lazy feel like a good option.

I would like to exercise to get fitter, and better at it, so this would counteract my answers to the first question. I want to enjoy it, but think i can only achieve this by doing it consistently. I want to use exercise to help with my weight loss and overall feel good factor.

Id like to stop being lazy cos its the easiet pastime in the world to take up, and watch your life slip you by, and i wanna live my life!!

:) general emotion is, DOH!!! whats half hour a day if it breaks my vicious cycle of laziness???

Watch this space, im gonna do half an hour of some sort of exercise daily, I WILL!!

K xx
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Uh Oh, who invented chocolate?

Actually no, who decided to refit my local asda and stop it being 24hours so i couldnt go shopping after work last night?

I;ve been down home for a couple of weeks and got back yesterday to no fresh fruit/veg in the flat, so planned to shop after work (i work on the til in the supermarket.) But, without warning, we arent 24hours now, so it shut when i finished my shift.

Managed to scrape breakfast and lunch together, but realised for tea i wanted lots of veggies as was feeling unhealthy, so went to the corner store.

Why oh why do all corner stores put bags of chocolate at the tills?

Well home i came, with veggies, multi grain bread, a paper and erm Potato Waffles, little whoops, and a bag of quality streets, bigger whoops!! Had a lovely tea, but am now scoffing choccies, BAD BAD BAD!! Gonna do another 30 mins of my dvd at 7 to compensate, kinda!!

GRRRRRR!!!
 
Well my questions were more conceptual, just to get you to start thinking. I didn't mean for you them to answer them here. :)

However, what I was getting at is, we all act out of what we associate pain and pleasure to. I made a lengthy post about this not too long ago. Let me see if I can find it.
 
Here was the post I was talking about

This was a post I made in a member's journal and was asked to put it in its own thread. If anything, maybe it can start some convo. Hopefully it will make some people think too. I have been meaning to write an "article" on the subject.... just having trouble getting around to it:

I think this is very common actually. At least with the people I have dealt with in much more close settings. I have found many people, men and women, who have been big most of their lives.... and as much as they want the weight gone, they always find a way to sabotage their efforts. The generator of this sabotage, once we dig deep enough, always seems to be related to fear.

I am not sure if I have written about this in here or not, but we all act out based on 2 distinct factors.

1. Pain
2. Pleasure

We all have internal, mental scales that weigh each and every action that we will partake. If more pain is associated with that action, than pleasure, we are going to do our darnedest to avoid the action.

In this case, we speak of weight loss. It is important to note that these internal scales reside in our subconscious minds. Our subconscious minds are on auto-pilot. This is where habits are born too.

As much as we consciously want to transform our physiques, if our subconscious minds are not in line with this conscious thought process, you will continually sabotage your efforts.

One simple way to start changing these deeply buried "neural inputs" is to start consciously thinking about your pain/pleasure links. Deep down, you most likely associate pain to weight loss. You said so yourself, you fear that people will still look right past you and you will realize that it wasn't your weight all along, it was something more important. It was YOU.

That is enough pain (fear) to stop even the strongest I know in their tracks. Sure, you will lose some weight, but most who I encounter who are in this same boat go back and forth in their battles. Just when they start picking up momentum, which is crucial for weight loss, they sabotage their efforts.

The beauty of this all is this.

You have the unique ability to change which way your scale is tilted. Start focusing on linking a lot more pleasure to weight loss. And really focus on linking a lot of pain on not losing weight. I would even suggest writing things down. And read and re-read the list. Think about the list as often as possible.

Repetitive thought is a sure way of tapping into your subconscious mind.... something that is necessary if you are going to really change habits and internal, pre-programmed beliefs born from long ago.

My thoughts on the subject at hand.
 
Hiya Steve,

Thanks very much for that, definately food for thought, the pain will oh so be worth it. Need to get the old subconcious to believe me!!

Cheers x
 
More importantly you have to get your mind to start believing that pain exists in NOT changing your lifestyle. I think once you do that, things become a whole lot easier.
 
yeah, im well and truly in the fat suit comfort zone just now.

Think my biggest problem is, the weight fell off me in india before, so now i half have the thought pattern that well, if i dont really lose much before july, as soon as i step out the country it'll be easy, and that is not a good thing to be thinking........
 
Hey, it looks like you are doing great!

I DESPISE exercise. Just something about forcing my body to push itself like that and get all sweaty....not fun. But I have found that I love walking. I actually get sad now when I know I wont have a chance to walk that day. I love playing my mp3 player really loud and just letting my mind wander....its very therapeutic. I tried the machines in the gym and it just didnt do it for me. I would get sooo bored and be uncomfortable with all the people around.

So, that is my bit o' advice :) find an exercise that you truly enjoy (for me its walking and swimming). You could join a dance class or take karate.

Good luck!
 
Thanks for the message!! And welldone at your weight loss, wow!!

I know exactly what you mean about finding an exercise I enjoy, but there are too many things putting me off doing any exercise outside of the house. I am embarassed about how i look in a swimming costume/vest top etc and also about the complete lack of fitness I have.

So, i think the answer is to stick out the workout dvds everyother day til I am a bit fitter, and then re think the plan.

I used to love exercise and sport when i was younger, so the weight is a definate barrier Im determined to overcome!!

K x
 
Yeah, I understand what you mean about not wanting to go outside the house. I haven't actually started swimming yet, but I plan on getting a membership at a gym this summer mostly just so I can swim (and since its a 24 hour gym I can find a time where there are the least amount of people lol). If the dvds are working for you thats great :) which ones do you use? I have 2 tae bo ones that I havent had a chance to use in a while cause kicking and punching doesnt really work in my itsy bitsy dorm room :p .
 
Good luck with joining the gym. When I am back in India (July) i will start swimming daily, it seems easier to do that sorta thing out there though!!

I know what you mean about lack of space, im in a shared house at the moment, and although my room is a good size, I had to do a lot of rearranging to get enough room to move about!!

I am mainly using Davina Mcall's DVDs. I have both power of 3 (60 minute workout with cardio, legs and bum, upper body and abs sections) and her three 30minute workouts, which has a pump (cardio interval training) section, Cardio Box and Core Stability (which at the mo i cant do at all lol!) I enjoy these, easy to follow, give you an easier option in each section, and have good music. Also have a salsacise on and a street dancing one, and another couple of general ones, none of which i've used much yet, but defo got plenty to keep me going without getting bored!!

K x
 
Well, day one is almost over, so I shall do my food diary:

Breakfast:
Bowl of ASDA vitality with berries cereal (basically special K) with semiskimmed milk
2 satsumas

Lunch:
Ham Salad Sandwich

Dinner:
Grilled chicken, stir fried veg in chilli soy sauce and Potato Waffles

Snacks:
About 15 quality street, WHOOOPSSS

Drinks:
1.5 litres (ish) water
too much coffee
one glass proper unsweetened orange juice

Exercise:
30 mins dvd workout (Davinas bums and legs plus a little of upper body)

Not too bad, wish i hadnt had the choccies tho, grrrr!!

Best things about today, well im actually looking forward to tomora, feeling happy about how today has gone overall, and so pleased I didnt eat anything after my dinner, nighttime binging used to be my biggest weakness. Gonna try keep myself busy tomora so i can avoid over eating, thinking of making a lovely big smoothie for brekkie, mmmm!!!

K xx

Edited to Add: Im not following any specific diet or calorie counting, just trying to eat three good meals and healthy snacks, any comments or opinion on my eating habits would be appriciated! Ta x
 
DAY TWO :eek:D

Well, day two here we are. And OMG, im obsessing over dieting this time. Not sure that is good. But, its like as long as i think about it all the time i wont stray, but not sure its healthy for it to be all i think about all day.

Well, this morning so far have decided on my meals, snacks and exercise for the day. And have decided I need to do something other than obsess about food and diet other than at meal times, so i have a plan to start packing up my stuff (only about three weeks til I move outta this flat) so gonna get the bits and pieces that i wont need between now and then in boxes so its not a mad rush at the end. THEN, i GOTTA sort out through all my school papers, and get them all in order and sort out a revision timetable, have my final exams starting in two and a half weeks, so gotta get me (soon to be skinny lil) ass into gear on that front. I have the kitchen to sort out and a shopping list to plan out, im on a budget but determined to be healthy, so planning is the key. The sun is shining, so MIGHT even take a wander around the park later, maybe!! That could be pushing it though!!

Have fab days everyone!!!

K xx
 
ARRRGHHH!!!!

Im hungry, BUT, the homemade soup i took out the freezer still isnt defrosted for lunch, n i dont want to have my big meal now, i NEED that at dinnertime to try and stop my nightime binging, hmmmm!!

OK, off to make a smoothie, then will do my workout at about half two, n lunch after that, IT BETTER DEFROST!!

K x
 
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