I'm Afraid I'm Killing Myself - Help Me

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Punkin624

New member
I'm desperate. I have the good fortune to be morbidly obese without any diabetes, high blood pressure, or cholesterol issues. My heart is okay so far. But my legs, anke and feet are in so much pain I can barely walk. I know I should lose weight but I just cannot find it in me t start. I freeze at the thought of a diet. I freeze at the thought of not eating what I want when I want. I am lonely, can't find clothes, and have no friends. What is wrong with me. Therapy and church haven't helped. I am a believer but don't seem to get help through prayer. How awful is that. What is wrong with me? Do I have a death wish? Am I the only one who feels this? I am afraid and depressed and lonely. Help me.
Punkin
 
You have to find the willpower to lose weight for ONE DAY. and one day only. If you can lose weight for one day, then you can do it another day too. Very often, our goals seem insurmountable because we expect too much from ourselves. Figure out how many calories you need for the day, divide it into 5 or 6 meals, and you should be good! Try to get non fatty foods that are filling. Think lots of fruits and vegetables, and drink water! Very few people actually drink as much water as they should throughout the day.
If I can do it. you can do it.
 
Hi Punkin,
No, you're not the only one that feels the way you do but you do seem to of already decided that you can't lose weight and it does take effort and you really have to want it to happen.
You say you want to eat what you want, when you want. But ask yourself why you want. Why do we eat such utter rubbish that most of us wouldn't even want to feed our pets? My guess is that we eat to feel good, an emotional high maybe. How long does that feeling last? only as long as the foods in your mouth, then were left feeling worse and were overweight, and this just repeats over and over.

If you really want to turn it around only eat what you need, and become as active as you can to burn the calories. If you can't walk a few miles a day start with 10 minutes walks but do them often, like 5 or 6 times per day and slowly increase as you feel more able.

You have it within yourself to do what you need to do, you just need to recognise this fact and believe it.
 
I also forgot to mention, that when you exercise, maybe you should try the stationary bike. It's low impact, and usually not too hard on your body. Either that, or maybe a 15 minute walk. Start slow, but you'll get there.
 
I felt much the same way you do. I finally decided I wanted to be able to play golf, work in the yard, work on my antique cars, play with my kids, and live to see my kids grow up more than I wanted to eat what I wanted. I made my "To-Be" list (what I wanted to be, my heart's desire) and then my "To-Do" list. I listed out all of my motivations and reasons for wanting this, and then listed out intermediate goals (non-number goals, like be able to walk x far, run x minutes, fit into a certain pair of pants, etc.). I then made a list of actions I believed would help me achieve my goals. I made advance decisions. I decided I would exercise every morning so I set my clock for 6 am. One day I walk on the treadmill, one day I do bowflex training. I also plan everything I will eat in advance. I make a plan every night for the next day around a certain number of calories and % of protein, fat, and cabs. Every day I'm not gaining, I'm winning.

I finally figured out that I wanted this, and no one could do anything about it but me. No one was going to be able to give it to me, I had to work and sacrifice for it. It is so worth it when you start seeing results and start feeling better. It motivates me to keep going.

If I can do this, you can do this. There's lots of folks here battling the same issues and we're here for support. Lots of great resources and information here too. I hope you stick around and gain great knowledge of nutrition and exercise here and find the information, resources, and support to motivate you. Know that you can do it. Then decide you will do it. We'll help.
 
You need to ask yourself this: Are you more afraid of living or dying?
I'm sorry if that sounds brutal, but you need to stop being afraid of living! Yes, there are bad people in this world, but there are great people too! We're all put on this earth to make a difference, but you have to choose to want to be part of this world.
Please stay here, join us, at least once a day, and LIVE!
....
Okay, I know this is the third time I replied to this thread, but I have strong feeling that you can turn your life around!
 
I'm Amazed, Thank You

I ams amazed at howmanyr esponses I've gotten. Thank you. Your words are balm for my wound. I do want to remain in the land of the living. That much I know. I will reread these posts several times today. I am afraid of being needy, but I am and can't deny it. I'll post again. Thank you all.
 
Punkin624 said:
I will reread these posts several times today. I am afraid of being needy, but I am and can't deny it. I'll post again. Thank you all.
Click to expand...
Hey, don't worry about it! I'm single, and I post here a lot, for lack of a life.
I'll keep an eye on you! Check out the off topic forum for some stuff to do, or feel free to contribute your own threads. See you around.
added........
Here's a great thread that should give you lots of idea of what you should and shouldn't be eating!
http://weight-loss.fitness.com/nutrition/44556-good-banned-ugly.html
 
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I just read this and i definitely know how you feel. But to be honest with you. Dealing with the thought of changing your habits and lifestyle. Is a lot harder than actually just doing it. The more you think about it and the more you worry about it. The harder it will be to make the choice to start changing your life. I am a very big guy. And i also was born with WPW(bad wiring in the heart) And i now have sleep apnia. And also very bad anxiety attacks. And with all these problems. I still managed to lose 70lbs in a matter of 4 months. My first 40 lbs i lost with almost no exercise at all. All i did was stop eating sugary foods and stopped drinking soda. Its amazing how if you just make a couple of extra healthy choices in your life you will notice an impact. And after you lose the first few pounds your confidence will sky rocket and you will see that you can do it. If you do not feel comfortable making huge changes all at once. Just do it a step at a time. And i promise you after a few of those steps you will be on your way. And its like my nutritionist told me. Its not about dieting just to lose a few pounds. Its about rethinking your whole lifestyle. If i can do it anybody can do it please believe me. I was convinced i was doomed to die. And i still have some health problems because of my weight. But with every passing week i feel so much better is my body gets healthier. Things become so much easier. And fears just fade away along with the pounds
 
I've given this thread a lot of thought and I have an idea. Sometimes looking at wholesale changes can be daunting and overwhelming. So, lets consider making small incremental changes rather than everything all at once.

Start with drinking a glass of water before every meal and once in between meals.

Then, after doing that for a little while, start by replacing some of the items in your grocery list with healthier versions (skim milk, fat free cheese, fat free dressings and condiments). These are calories we can cut and not even miss them.

Then start by adding some helathier snacks in between meals (fat free yogurt, fat free cottage cheese with fruit, etc.).

Then start making some healthier meal choices, like grilled chicken and fish with vegetables, etc.

Just take a look at what you are doing and look at ways to cut back here and there and then start layering these approaches once you've incorporated one of them into your routine. This helps ease you into it rather than try to tackle 100% change all at once.

I hope this helps.
 
Stick around this forum and utilize the resources here, it'll get you in the right frame of mind for a start! Welcome to WLF and best of luck. You can turn your life around--If we can do it, you can do!
 
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