How Kathar Shall Regain Her Old Self Back

Make that about 1600 for today. I really hate myself sometimes.

And they were chicken thigh portions. 4 ounces = 140 calories. The package was 2 pounds. It came with five pieces, but I cut them into eight. 32/8 = 4. 140 times 2 is 280, and I always round up.
1600 isn't bad.

I do understand your frustration...I look back to when I first registered here. I was dieting and working out but it felt like no progress was being made. Actually none was the first month, but I knew I was doing the right thing and just kept on keeping on. Slowly the weight will come off.

If you're not able to stick with your calorie plan, maybe you should trying switching up the foods to leaner options or bump up the calories a bit and just expect the weight loss to be slower, but hopefully more permanent.

I think some of my early posts were just as frustrated and angry sounding as yours currently are. If you stick with it, you will see success.
 
Today's OK so far.

Breakfast: 1 cup cereal, 200 calories

Lunch: Pita with chicken, romaine leaves, and mustard, 300 calories
Lunch: Banana, 100 calories

Snack: Granola bar, 200 calories

Dinner: An eggplant sliced and baked with goat cheese and herbs, 200 calories
Dinner: Yogurt with blueberries, 200 calories

Total so far: 1200 calories; will plan a 100-200 calorie snack later.
 
Fell off the wagon AGAIN. I think I need to just glue my mouth shut or something. Every day I seem to look worse.

I don't know how to stop eating at night. Every day it ruins me. I haven't lost any weight in so long. And I'm short so losing weight means I have to practically starve myself. I'm NOT doing the right thing. But I don't know how to stop.
 
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I weighed myself today: 141.5. That's THREE POUNDS more than yesterday. I certainly look heavier. None of my clothes fit today. I had to fish clothes out of the laundry basket and Febreze them. This is my life. It doesn't make me look any less horrible.

----

Breakfast: Cereal, 200 calories
Breakfast: Rice pudding cup, 100 calories

Lunch: Smoked salmon pouch, 200 calories
Lunch: Banana, 100 calories

Snack: Granola bar, 200 calories

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I have no idea what dinner will be. My mother is making spaghetti with meat sauce, which I obviously can't eat. I'll probably just have to eat a yogurt with vegetables.
 
At 1400 for today. Now comes the hardest part of every day. I also went to the gym, and got yelled at for not having a job even though I'm trying my hardest to find one.
 
Kathar, you've got to get out of this mindset of "spaghetti and meat sauce- I'm not allowed to have that." You can have anything as long as you eat a normal/small portion and don't eat high-caloric foods for every single meal. I went out to a Mexican restaurant a few nights ago and ate barely half of my dinner & didn't feel one single ounce of guilt about it because I know I ate a reasonable portion and didn't gorge myself. I didn't have time to make lunch for work this morning, so I had to eat out. I ate Panera and only ate half my sandwich. So I got 350 calories instead of 700. You have to make changes like that instead of "well, since I'm going out and I will undoubtedly stuff my face to no end, I must only eat a single carrot at the beginning of the day."

The solution is to just order the most healthy option (even if its not really healthy, if its healthier than the other options- its the best choice) and don't get of control. Force yourself to stop eating halfway through your meal and just drink a glass of water and wait to see if you are still hungry. I'm not trying to be preachy, these things take a lot of practice and patience to learn how to do, but you have to start somewhere that's do-able. You mindset makes dieting miserable and shitty and I would frankly be pissy all the time too if I had to live by your rules. I would probably make a lot more mistakes than you do, too.

Good job on getting to the gym today. How often are you going nowadays? Also, good luck on finding that job. It's really a tough time to be looking for one. Try talking face to face with the manager of a place you apply at and just plead with them that you really need a stable job and you are a hard worker that won't let them down. Most people appreciate that kind of extra effort to get a job even though it might seem fleeting to you.
 
I don't mean to sound harsh, but it's different for you. It's easy for you to say that you can eat whatever you want, because you have so many more calories at your disposal. I did the math; your BMR is almost equal to my maintenance calories. I should really be doing 1200 with my height. I can't even do that.

Besides, if I only eat a small portion, I won't be satisfied at all. I'll feel even worse. Meals are supposed to be substantial. It's not the food I'm eating that's making me miserable, it's the fact that I can't stop eating at night. And yes, I did it again, although I don't think it was AS bad. I don't know how to stop. There's really nothing to do here. The only parts of my day that I enjoy are the parts where I'm eating something. I look forward to going to sleep because I know I'll be able to eat again when I wake up.

And every day I look and feel fatter, and my clothes are fitting worse. I haven't gained any weight according to the scale since last year, but something's changed because I'm running out of things I can wear. I only have about 1 pair of jeans and about 5 shirts that fit anymore. I can't afford to buy more because I don't have a job. I can't even get an interview.

I'm going to the gym 3 times a week although I'm trying to push it up to 4. I hate going, though.
 
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Hi! I can really relate to what your feeling, I have a love of food too, and I really really find it hard to stop eating at night.

I don't mean to sound harsh, but it's different for you. It's easy for you to say that you can eat whatever you want, because you have so many more calories at your disposal. I did the math; your BMR is almost equal to my maintenance calories. I should really be doing 1200 with my height. I can't even do that.

Who told you 1200 calories? I eat more calories than that and lose weight (even though I am taller I am about 125lbs, which would mean I have a lower BMR).

Plus you exercise! Which means you can eat even more calories. Have you ever tried figuring out your BMR with the Harris Benedict Formula? You then times your BMR by your activity levels. Subtracting 15% from that number will still give you heaps of calories to work with! You can still enjoy the foods you want.

Besides, if I only eat a small portion, I won't be satisfied at all. I'll feel even worse. Meals are supposed to be substantial.

So why not have that food you are really craving with a MASSIVE side salad to fill you up? Or serve it with vegetables which have heaps of fibre and fill you up.

If you have a small portion of the good stuff and HEAPS of good stuff you will be satisfied!

Have you ever tried making healthier versions of your favourite foods? It is possible.

There's really nothing to do here. The only parts of my day that I enjoy are the parts where I'm eating something. I look forward to going to sleep because I know I'll be able to eat again when I wake up.

That's your problem right there, so thats good that you know where your weakness is!
How to fix it and get on track? Keep yourself busy!!! Personally I would LOVE all that free time to do nothing, but seriously, there are so many things you can do to pass the time before you go back to college, I suggested heaps in your other thread.

It sounds like you are looking for a quick fix, and not a lifestyle change.

Do you intend to eat those kinds of foods forever??? Once you lose the weight you can not go back to how you would normally eat, you need to make a lifestyle change!

Instead of thinking "im on a diet" maybe start thinking about leading a healthier lifestyle instead? Maybe stop tracking calories for a while, and really start to listen to your body, see when you are feeling hungry, then eat, stop when you are full and only eat when you are hungry again. This sounds simple but its not, but listening to your body is a really good tool.

I went from 140lbs to 118lbs and I still managed to have junk food, chocolate and lollies like every day. Because I didn't BAN it from my diet I didn't crave it as much, and I viewed my diet as a change for life, and I knew I couldnt live without those things forever.

I just think you need a fresh approach, I wasn't intending to be mean, just throwing round a few ideas for you.
 
I've seen a number of different calculations for my daily calorie needs, ranging from 1000 to 1500. I picked 1200 since it's on the lower side of the middle. I've tried making healthier versions of my favorite foods. It isn't the food I'm eating, it's the amount and the timing of it. It's only 1:18 PM and I've already eaten my 800 calories, which is all I allow myself before dinner.

Listening to my body isn't an option. I'm never hungry, and I'm never full. All my life, I have never been hungry, and I have never been full. I can go a day without eating and not be hungry, and I can eat continuously for hours and not be full. I barely know what they feel like.

Once I lose the weight, I'll go back to how I normally eat because I'm good at maintaining weight. This is what I normally eat, just much less of it.
 
I don't mean to sound harsh, but it's different for you. It's easy for you to say that you can eat whatever you want, because you have so many more calories at your disposal.
I don't eat whatever I want. I eat controlled portions of healthy options of food. BTW, even though I have more calories "at my disposal" I've been switching between high and low days; yesterday I ate 1500 calories and didn't flinch. If I can do that, you can handle 1200-1300.

Listening to my body isn't an option. I'm never hungry, and I'm never full. All my life, I have never been hungry, and I have never been full.
Frankly, I don't buy it. Everyone gets hungry at some point. Why don't you stop eating completely and see how long it takes for you to get hungry? [I'm kind of being sarcastic, but since you insist you cannot be hungry which sounds like a crock...maybe a fast is the right option for you].

Besides, if I only eat a small portion, I won't be satisfied at all.
Wait, wait, wait, wait. I thought you were never satisfied because you can never get full. So maybe you fudged a bit on that and you can be satisfied? Obviously, you know what its like to be "satisfied" if that's the feeling you get from eating *not* small portions.

it's the fact that I can't stop eating at night.
Your behavior sounds completely out of control and you only want to make excuses and not admit the problem and the solution lies within yourself. That is the cause of your weight problem. Look, this isn't going to be easy. Reversing years of negligent behavior like stuffing your face with an entire bag of cheetos night after night isn't a simple, short process. You have to make sacrifices, maybe feel hungry some times, and go to the gym when you hate going. If you want to remain fat for the rest of your life, keep complaining and having a fatalist attitude. It won't get you anywhere.

You need to admit that becoming overweight was totally and solely your fault & it is yours and your responsibility alone to reverse the years of abuse you have put on your body. It WILL NOT be easy. If you don't want it bad enough, you will never be thin. Grit your teeth and bare it. Look around, there are fat people everywhere that truly believe its someone else's fault they are fat so they have given up. A lot of them will never be happy with their bodies for the period they are alive and then they will die 20 years sooner than they would have if they were thin. Pretty good future, huh? Years of self esteem problems and then early death.

Since you want fast results, go to the gym 6 times a week instead of 3. Don't always take the easier path. If you want results, push yourself to the max & give it some time, but don't expect magical weight loss when you are still gorging yourself on boredom food at night and half-assing going to the gym only 3x/week.
 
I just don't get hungry. I don't understand how that's so hard to believe. And when I say "satisfied," it's entirely psychological. It's not a matter of "OK, my stomach feels full, time to stop eating," it's "OK, I feel like I've eaten enough to qualify as dinner, time to stop eating." Physical sensations don't play into it at all. It's a matter of the amount, timespan, and type of eating that I think is appropriate.

Let's use something unhealthy, since that was the original analogy. Let's suppose dinner is lasagna. I don't like lasagna, so don't even go there. It's the first fattening food I could think up. Now. If I had one forkful of lasagna, my thoughts would be "OK, that's nice, where's dinner?" A forkful of something will make me feel deprived no matter WHAT it is. That's amount.

Now, for timespan. I eat bananas sometimes on my diet, but they never satisfy me because they go so quickly. It's almost impossible to eat a banana slowly. My thought: "OK, that took 1 minute and I still feel like eating, but I've already used 100 calories." By contrast, mangos go rather slowly, as do oranges. They take longer to eat. That can make a big difference. Amount and timespan go hand in hand, usually.

And now, for type. I could eat an entire bag of lettuce, but that won't feel like dinner either because it's insubstantial. It doesn't taste like anything. It doesn't have any kind of substance. I don't know how to describe it without examples. Cereal has substance, lettuce doesn't. Chicken has substance, flounder doesn't. Tofu has substance; soup doesn't. It's not a matter of being filling either. I don't get full. It's a matter of tasting like something that works as a meal. It's psychological.

I don't eat Cheetos either. I don't eat anything unhealthy like that. I find them disgusting. Last night, it was a handful at a time of cereal, small pieces of boiled chicken, and a few walnuts. They're small things that add up. I don't appreciate you assuming things about my diet that aren't true. If I didn't say I do or eat something, you have NO RIGHT to assume I do.

I also never said it wasn't my fault. I know it's my fault. I just don't know how to stop. And going to the gym 3 times a week is FAR more than I used to do, so I don't appreciate your putting it down.

I hate how everyone always flames me here. I joined this forum for encouragement, not to hear even MORE people yelling at me. I get enough of that at home.
 
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Oh yes, since you're so set on the stereotype of me stuffing my face with junk food, here's what I ate today.

Breakfast: One mango and a few walnuts, 200 calories

Lunch: A Flat Out wrap with boiled chicken and field greens, 300 calories

Lunch: 1 cup cereal, 200 calories

Snack: A few cheddar soy crisps, 100 calories
 
No one flames you...they just try to HELP you SEE when and if you NEED help or if you COULD BE doing things in a better way.

It's kinda funny how you say you joined this forum for encouragement, but it doesn't SOUND :bigear: like you want to HEAR any of it........:banghead:

I hope you find your way HUN!!! YOU are what you think you are, and if you maintain thinking you LOOK FAT and FEEL FAT and ARE GETTING FATTER...then you WILL BE!!! CHANGE your thinking and FEEL that YOU DESERVE this, and YOU WILL!!! :)
 
<sigh>...Kathar, the point of my post wasn't to assume you eat junk food, it was to point out that you have to get your snacking under control at night- no matter what you are snacking on- even if its plain brown rice flour. You could eat 12 oranges and even though 1 is healthy, 12 is out of control and not a healthy portion. So replace where I said cheetos with "random healthy food." I picked cheetos because chips used to be a snack I had a problem with when it came to portion control. I used to eat an entire bag of cheetos in one sitting as a side item for lunch. That's why I picked that example. Jesus, the whole world isn't out to get you.

I get frustrated because I take the time to be encouraging and get nothing but more excuses and "I'm the victim" mentality. When people post encouraging comments to threads I start or to my journal I actually try their suggestions instead of coming up with reasons why I can't. I usually don't even reply until I have given a suggestion an honest effort.

As far your long explanation of the "substance" of foods. Get over it. It takes your brain about 15 minutes to even realize you've eaten. Eat a snack and then stop and don't think "am I full enough? am I satisfied? did that take me long enough to eat?" You're on a diet! You shouldn't ever be "full" as in the feeling I get after I gorge on a gigantic meal! It takes me about 5-10 minutes to eat every meal. Snacks last 1-3 minutes. I eat bananas too and I eat one probably faster than you and then stop thinking about food. The sensation you call "still feeling like eating" is what I call "hunger" and I just give food a chance to be recognized by my brain. Then you forget about it.

And going to the gym 3 times a week is FAR more than I used to do, so I don't appreciate your putting it down.
Again, excuses. I suggested you go 6x a week because you are so anxious to see results. It's great you are going 3x a week, but don't complain that you aren't seeing results fast enough if you don't want to go the extra mile. It's that simple & that's not "putting it down" that you go to the gym 3x.
I joined this forum for encouragement, not to hear even MORE people yelling at me. I get enough of that at home.
Maybe you should try listening to some of the people that care enough to yell at you for a change. You dismiss every single piece of advice anyone gives you with an excuse.
 
I do try things. The fact that I haven't given up days ago is proof of this.

The sensation I call "still feeling like eating" is still wanting to taste food and get that enjoyment and have that way to fill time. It's the equivalent of "still wanting to talk to someone" or perhaps "wanting to read another chapter". It isn't being hungry, because I'm never hungry. Why is this so hard for you to believe? Why would I lie?

And calling what I'm doing "half-assed" counts as putting it down in my book.
 
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If all you like is the taste, try chewing up food you like and spitting it out. You will burn calories that way.

If you aren't getting the results you want to see from your current exercise regime, then it is "half-assed" by your own standards. Raise the bar or accept slow progress.
 
hay there sweetie i can totally relate to you eating at night, thats my downfall too, actually at the moment iam hungry but iam not going to eat anything as iam going to bed in a mo. Maybe you should try to go to be early and read a book and relax that might help you stay away from food :)

Have fun at the gym
 
It isn't being hungry, because I'm never hungry. Why is this so hard for you to believe? Why would I lie?

I don't believe that.
If you are 'never hungry' you should go to a doctor, because it could be something more than that.

What you should do is when you get up in the morning wait until you are actually hungry before you eat breakfast (until your stomach is rumbling with pain) and THEN eat, then stop when your stomach says STOP. YES IT IS possible to do this!

If you go a whole day without feeling hungry there is something wrong with you and you should go see a doctor.

You just eat because you are bored? Maybe you need to exercise some self control? What about just saying no?
 
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