Hi everyone (warning: long post lol)

baby82

baby82

New member
I'm new here (obviously lol). This is the first time ever that I have joined any form of support system. I'm hoping it will make a difference and give me the motivation that I need.

A little about my weight loss struggle...
I've been overweight pretty much since I was a child (I'm 25 now). At first I blamed my parents. They never said no to me when I wanted something. And that included food. So I grew up thinking that I could eat whatever I wanted whenever I wanted. Being young, I didnt know it was wrong, so I just kept doing it. It took me up until the late years of middle school to realize (or awknowledge would probably be a better word) that I was a lot bigger than most of the other kids my age. Being very shy, I never really got picked on because I didn't interact very much with other kids. I kept to myself most of the time and only had a few close friends. But it was once I started hitting the higher grades that I started hearing and noticing the comments people were making about me. Needless to say, it got worse as I entered high school. I then got really depressed and of course, just ate more. That's where the blame on my parents ended and the blame from then on was on me.
Anyways, after a couple years in high school of going through hell, I eventually dropped out. Which then of course gave me even more time and freedom to eat. It also added to my depression because I actually enjoyed school (when I wasnt being picked on) and missed attending my classes. So that led to even more eating. That continued for about a year. In those three years (the 2 years in highschool and the year after I dropped out) I probably tried more diets than you could ever imagine. The problem was that if I didnt see results very quickly, I would get mad and frustrated and give up. Going right back into my routine of eating whatever I wanted whenever I wanted. Food was my safety net. I knew it would never turn it's back on me (in a sense) and that it would always be there no matter what. For me, it was like a best friend. I had pushed away the few friends that I did have and my parents. I was pretty much alone.
Then one day, I think I was about 17, I just woke up and realized that I had had enough. I decided it was time to change and get my life back. In more ways then just losing weight. I needed to get back into school and graduate (which I did), I needed to let go of the shyness and become more outgoing (which I did), which in turn boosted my self confidence in myself. I fixed my relationship with my parents and actually allowed myself to become part of the family again. The only problem was, that I was so busy with getting the rest of my life together, that I wasnt so much worried about losing the weight. I was older now, the kids I hung out with were older, meaning there was more maturity and there wasnt really anyone picking on me or belittling me about my weight. So I just put it into the back of my mind and went on with life.
It wasnt until I was 20, out of school and living on my own that I really started thinking about my weight again. I had noticed that not only was I not losing weight, I was gaining it again. And fast! It seemed like I would go out one day and buy a pair of pants or something similar, and then by the next week, they wouldnt fit (and I always buy my clothes one size too big, so you can imagine how much I was gaining and how quick).
So again, I started with the MANY yo-yo diets. Most didnt work at all, some I had a little success with. But I had the same problem as when I was younger. I wasnt seeing results fast enough so I would quit and give up because I kept thinking that the diets werent working.
Anyways, I continued with the pointless off and on dieting for a couple more years, not really getting anywhere with them. I was pretty much maintaining a steady weight but I wasnt losing anything.
I met my husband when I was 22 and we got married a year later. He has never belittled me about my size (or anything for that matter) and has been very supportive in everything I have tried or not tried to do about it.
It wasnt until we started trying to have a baby, that I realized just how much me being over weight could cost me and my husband. We both want a large family. We love kids and can't wait to have a few of our own. It took almost a year of trying to concieve before I finally went and talked to my doctor about it. Right away he told me that it was due to my weight but I was stubborn and didnt believe him. I got him to run every test available on me and my husband, to no avail. They all came back fine. We were both fertile and able to concieve. You would think that would make me overjoyed, but it didnt. It depressed me very much. Because that meant that our problems were solely on me and my weight. I finally accepted that but I didnt like it.
My husband sat me down one night and we talked for hours about it all. He reminded me that I'm only 25 years old (he's 29) and that we still have lots of time to have kids. He encouraged me to take a couple years to get myself down to a healthy weight that I was happy with and then we would try again.
There's more to it but im sure you all get the point. I REALLY want to have children. Nothing ever in my life has been more motivating to me to lose weight then knowing that after it's all gone, I can finally be a mother. This is something I HAVE to do for me, but I'm also doing it for my husband and our future.

I NEED to do this. I WANT to do this. And with support, I'm pretty sure I can. I have a long way to go. Right now I'm 300 lbs. I want to get down to about 180. 180 lbs might still seem like a lot to you guys, but I'm 6 feet tall and I don't want to end up looking like a bean pole lol. I just want to look and feel healthy for once in my life. If I find I need to lose more after I reach that goal, then I will. But for now my goal is to lose 120 lbs. I'm hoping to lose it by this time next year, but I know it takes time, so I'm not giving up this time no matter what and no matter how long it takes.

Anyways, thanks for listening to me ramble on lol. Sorry it is so long. I could have just said hi and told you how much I wanted to lose, but I'm going to be getting to know you all and going through this with all of you, so I figured you had a right to know how I got to where I am. I am going to try to be as active on these boards as possible. I have been reading a lot of the threads and you all seem like such amazing, warm hearted people. I'm very glad I found this place and I'm looking forward to getting to know you all.

To OUR success :)
Baby
 
Hi Baby,

I am new to this site too, and have about the same amount of weight to lose as you. I just wanted to say hi and welcome, and let you know I completely relate to everything you said!

Magic
 
Welcome Baby82 and Magic

The help and information on this forum is fantastic it has helped me tremendously good luck with your quest im sure you can both succeed.

One great idea i was given amongst others was to start a diary on here.
 
Hi there! I'm pretty new too, I just joined yesterday.

You have a wonderful reason to lose weight and I am sure you will make it. I know this may sound strange but I like to envision where I want to be in the future, close myself in a room and light up some candles and do yoga breathing w/or w/out meditation music while imagining what I will be like then, but also trying to be loving to myself with where I am as a starting point. If I am feeling down about things or that things feel impossible I like to browse through quotes that are inspirational or I like to write a letter to God ! I don't know how religious you are, I am not religious, but I need that belief that someone is listening to me and that things are all for a reason so that works for me:) As far as weight loss, the greatest amount of weight loss I had to do was lose 50lbs. What helped me was a software that keeps track of how many calories I need to limit myself to in order to reach my goal weight, it is called DietPower. I mention it a lot because it helped me out so well :) I am using it again to lose the 20lbs I gained back with binge eating these past few months.

I hope this helps a little!
 
Welcome to this forum. Your reason for losing weight is a wonderful as kiddos are a blessing:) You can do it! and you will decrease your risk for hurting both yourself and your baby when you get to your goal weight. Good luck!! Don't forget to watch your food! As they always say around here you have to burn more than you consume to lose weight!!
:party:
 
Thank you

Thank you all for the warm words and welcome. It's nice to find a place where I can share things with people that are going through the same things as I am.
Is there any "certain" diet that any of you suggest? I know there are so many out there, and believe me, I've tried a lot of them in the past. But I wasn't as passionate about losing this weight back then as I am now. I just want to find something that works and continues to work.
I know calorie counting is probably the best way to go about it, but if I can add a diet to the calorie counting, I think it would make a difference.

My biggest problem is going to be giving up Pepsi. I'm ADDICTED to that stuff and drink way too much of it. Also, I heard coffee isn't good for you when you are trying to lose weight...is that true? Because I'm addicted to that too lol. My husband and I have coffee on all day. The only time I'm not drinking coffee is when I'm drinking pepsi! (ya I know, very wrong lol)
 
For me calorie counting worked the best. I would bounce between 1200-1600. I tried to eat low fat and made a lot of substitutions that I never thought I would do! LIke fat free milk and salad dressing!
I have heard of coffee being a staller for weight loss and though black it has very little calories not a lot of people drink it black they put creamer and other things with calories. I don't know about the effects of caffine.
Soda is a killer! Even diet soda! Try to wean yourself off soda. Just cut down and drink diet when you can. It is just so full of sugar and calories and my friend who has lost a lot of weight finds that when she drinks diet she doesn't lose weight either!! So both seem to be bad! Drinking lots of water is really helpful and there are a lot of low calorie flavor things to add.
It is really a big change. I eased into last November and then went dead on in January and it is really hard to change bad habits and I even struggle now but it gets better and it is worth it!
Starting a diary might be helpful too:)
 
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OK, so here how I'm going to start:

I need some time to get used to the calorie counting what with all the figuring and stuff. So while I'm teaching myself about all that, here's what I'm going to do...

- I usually drink my coffee double double. Starting now, I'm drinking it black with only one teasopoon of sugar (gonna take awhile before I can get used to drinking it just plain black and even longer before I can totally stop drinking it). Next time I go shopping I will pick up some splenda and start using that instead of sugar.

- I am 100% cutting out Pepsi and any other kind of cola. I do not like the taste of diet pepsi at all so switching to that would be pointless. So I will just cut it out all together and deal with the cravings for awhile.

- I usually only eat one meal a day...dinner. And it's usually a pretty good sized meal. Starting tomorrow I am going to start eating three meals a day and cut down on my portions at dinner. Breakfast will be the hardest because I am never hungry in the mornings. But I also know it's the most important so I will deal with it.

- I don't eat junk food very often (chips, chocolate, cookies, etc), but when I do I eat a lot of it at a time. So I'm totally cutting all junk out of my diet. This will be hard because we always have it in the house considering my husband is a junk food junkie. Unfortunately for me, I'm not 135 lbs like he is (damn men lol) so from now on it's ALL a no no.

- We are not big meat eaters. We pretty much stick to chicken and hamburger(s). So I'm going to try out some different recipies that maybe are healthier than the way I am cooking now. Right now we roast our chicken (only skinless and boneless. thats all we eat) in a vinagerette dressing, which isn't really that bad, but our side dishes usually consist of something like onion rings, french fries, or potatoes. Which is not good. So I will just try more or less making healthier side dishes and adding lots of veggies.
As for the hamburger, I will start buying lean instead of regular. When we make hamburgers, I will bake them in the oven instead of frying them. (I believe baking is better than frying right?)

- I plan on buying lots of fresh fruit and veggies. I love mostly all of them and so does my hubby, so adding them to our grocery list will not be a big adjustment.

My number one biggest obstacle is that I LOVE to snack and eat late at night. I have always done this. I plan to eventually cut this totally out, but for now I think I will just stick to grabbing something healthy like fruit or veggies for a late night snack.

And of course...I will be drinking lots and LOTS of water (good thing I like it lol)

As for exersice, right now I am not active at all. Other than the daily chores and cooking, I'm usually either on the computer or watching tv. My husband works nights and sleeps for most of the day, so I spend my days alone with pretty much nothing to do considering we just moved to a new city and I know absoloutely no one here.
My goal for the exersice part is to start walking in the evenings. At first I will probably do a 30-45 minute 3 or 4 times a week. But eventually I would like to make it an hour 7 days a week. I have been very inactive for a long time so this will be very hard to get used to.

I'm going to try not spending so much time on the computer and in front of the tv during the days. I need to find something else to keep me occupied. Maybe I'll take my dog to the park during the day. Gives us both some needed exersice lol. My only problem right now is that I live in Canada, which means very cold winters, which means it's damn cold outside this time of year lol. I hate the cold very much and get cold very easily and fast, so it will also take some time to be able to get used to being outside so much in the winter.

My only other problem is my sleeping habits. I need to change them if I want to make this work. Right now, I 95% of the time stay up all night and then go to bed when my husband gets home in the morning. Although I still get around 7 hours of sleep, I end up waking up around 1 or 2 in the afternoon. Which pretty much rules out the 3 meals a day rule I have set for myself. Thankfully, it will only take about a week to get back into normal sleeping habits. Hopefully, this will also help me with my late night cravings and eating habits. If I'm sleeping and in bed at a normal time, I won't be able to eat lol.



Anyways, that's my plan for now. No calorie counting until I figure it all out and get used to it. For now, I'm just cutting things out and cutting things down. Hopefully this will work for awhile. I will adjust things as I need to.

What do you guys think about all this? Do you think it's a good place to start or should I be doing more?
 
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Just as an add on to my last post, im also going to take mishi's suggestion and start keeping a diary on here. I think it's a great way to keep track of my progress and getting all the help and support from everyone here will make things a lot more easier. So I will start that tomorrow :)
 
sounds like a good first start. I think the key is to start slow and ease into things. If no calorie counting learn what "real" measurements for food should be... like 1 serving of meat is the size of a deck of cards... etc. Watch your fat where ever you can. Be very aware that when eating out even salads can have over 1000 calories!!!! In the end it all boils down to them!
Your plan sounds really good though and having a diary here keeps you motivated and meeting people and getting info:)
Oh yeah and the burgers... I think grilling is the best so the fat drips down somewhere.. I am so going to buy me a George Foreman grill so I can grill inside:)
Good job on getting started! I will try to find your diary:)
 
hey Baby, welcome to the forum! I think you've got some very good ideas for starting. For walking in the winter, try going to the mall to walk. Take a bottle of water and wear some comfy clothes, and just walk briskly around the mall - I personally hate malls and all they stand for, but I'll go to one to walk in the winter if I need the exercise. Make sure you aren't hungry when you go so you aren't tempted to buy food at the food court, which nine times out of ten is bad for you. I think you can do it by easing yourself into it. Also, if you guys have the money, I'd suggest getting a George Forman grill - I bought one of the bigger ones, and it's been indispensible to me. It's tilted so that the fat cooks out of the meat and drips into a little pan, and you get the lean part and the juices, but not all the fat. I like cooking everything on it, even grilling veggies on it. It's very handy and easy to clean. Anyway, I think you're on the right track and you have what sounds like a good support system, so you should be fine! Good luck with everything, and we're all here for you if you need us! :)

-Amy
 
Thanks Mishi and Amy. I have all intentions of getting a george forman grill. I have heard they are great. I have to go do some christmas shopping this weekend so I will probably pick one up then.
The mall walking is a good idea although like you, I HATE malls. Especially during the holidays because they are so packed and I'm a little claustrophobic. But I will give it a try. It beats being out in the cold and freezing thats for sure. We have one of the biggest malls in Canada here in our city, so I will stick to maybe walking around that one. Lots of room to walk around and because it's such a big mall, it won't feel like it's so over crowded.

So, diet is starting tomorrow :eek: lol
Wish me luck, im gonna need it. This is so much change all at once. But I know in the end it will be worth it :)
 
Hey there, and welcome! I was going to suggest many of the things mishi talked about.

As for the calorie counting, I have an account on fitday.com and it has helped me so much. Might take a look at it and see if it would be something you would like too.

Congrats on deciding to start a diary!

Your story really touched me and I wish you SO much luck with this. Remember, weight loss isn't always about a few months worth of change, it's about a lifestyle change. I look forward to seeing you around and hearing how things are going with your journey and the best of luck to you!
 
I feel you when it comes to the winter weather. I live in Canada too (ontario). Working in a mall I would never want to go walking in it *too*, but window shopping can be fun, bring a friend to help make it better maybe!

My diet is reduced calorie intake while lowering the fat and sugar intake. I learned sugar promotes fat storage, or something to that effect. I don't remember 100% now. :)
 
Thank you radiant and trucker for the reps.
And thank you everyone for the kind words. Radiant, im going to check out that fitday site you mentioned.

I started my diary earlier. It was just a quick post so people could get to know me (who havnt read this one).
I've decided to wait until Monday to start my diet. I'm still going to be watching what I eat this weekend, but I think fully starting the diet and plan on a Monday of a new week would best benefit me and my mind frame right now.
So starting Monday, I will be making daily (hopefully) posts in my diary.

I'm so excited that I'm actually finally going to do this and get this weight off. It's way overdue! As much as it hurt, I guess finding out that I wouldnt be able to have children unless I lost the weight was just the kick in the butt that I needed!
 
Ok, I have a question.
I heard that green tea helps you lose weight and speeds up your metabolism. Is this true? And if so does anyone know if it tastes good? lol
I've never tried it before. But I love tea and I don't think it could really taste much different.
Everyone has been telling me how much it assists in weight loss so I just want to get your guys opinion before I try it
 
I LOVE green tea. I don't know about the weight or metabolism part, although I don't see how it's possible because I half live off the stuff. But for the taste, it's fabulous!
 
Thanks radiant. Maybe I will give it a try. Even if it doesnt help with the weight loss, at least it will be something to replace all the coffee I need to stop drinking lol
 
Hi there, it sounds like you have a lot of changes you want to make. I do too, actually, but I try not to change too much at once. When I try to change a lot of stuff at once and then I make a mistake on one part of it, I figure that I've blown the whole deal and give it all up. When I used to smoke, I would always try to quit smoking, start working out, and watch my diet on the same day. Then if I had a cigarette, I'd skip the gym and forget my diet too. Then I tried JUST quitting smoking, and it worked. Then I tried JUST going to the gym, and that worked. Now I'm working on my diet. Anyway, my point is to make it as easy on yourself as possible at first, until you get used to a new change. If you love coffee, drink it! It's just not that bad for you. If you want to drink more tea instead of coffee, start by substituting one cup a day, and then 2, and so on.

If you are like me, you are way ambitious and hopeful, which is good. But you don't want to set yourself up for failure or misery by not allowing yourself anything you enjoy. Just my opinion, of course, and you need to find what works for you. Peace!
 
Welcome to the WLF :). I recently read a book which has helped me a lot, and the advice seems to work perfectly into your lifestyle so I thought I would mention their advice.

The book explains why not eating all day causes you to eat a lot of food and snacks at night (this is due to the leptin hormone, which controls your hunger and metabolism and is produced by your fat cells, dropping too low). Supposedly eating at night is the worst time as it will turn off our night fat-burning which is when our body goes into its fat stores the most. Based on this, you would be better off eating your snack right after your dinner.

You can also do 2 rather than 3 meals with no ill effects. Its good to go 5-6 hours between meals to optimize fat burning, which supposedly kicks in only after food has been digested (3 hours following eating). That timing works out great for you, but have protein with your first meal and make sure it has enough calories to sustain you for the whole day to dinner without you becoming starving or tired by late afternoon/evening. That is how you'll control your night time snacking. I guarantee this part because it worked great for me and really controlled my evening and night time hunger and cravings.

So both meals should have at least 800 calories, lots of protein and less carbs but still have your carbs too, and you shouldn't eat a big meal past 6pm or a light meal past 7pm. The most important part is no snacking after dinner, get all your snacks in at dinner and preferably not anything with too much sugar except fruit. If you eat earlier, at lunch and dinner, you will be amazed how you wont get bad cravings after a few days.

Also, make sure you're doing as much walking as possible, several hours per week. This is a MUST if you want to get your health and metabolism in shape.

Good luck and keep us posted on your progress :).
 
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