Hi everybody :) Can someone help me?

J

Jessica3

New member
I'm new to this site, but came across it by looking at some of the before and after pictures I found. I was amazed and inspired and I was just wondering how do you keep motivated?

I've had problems with my weight throughout all of my life and really want to change for the sake of my health and to feel good about myself. I've tried so many diets its beyond belief, but I failed one after another. You name it i've tried it. The other day for me was the last straw though, I was walking home and a group of teenagers around 18-19 started shouting the most abusive comments to me. Shouting them in my face as I walked past and following me until I got to a safe place. As soon as I got home I burst into tears, wondering why people have to be so nasty and horrible. My brother came to me and said " your better than that... your better than them. You can't let stupid idiotic people like that ruin your life and make you feel like this. Now's the time to change... not for them but for yourself ".

It hit me hard at first but now I really do want to lose my excess weight and transform myself like the many wonderful people on here.

At the minute i'm on a diet plan and an exercise routine my brother has planned for me as he has qualified to be a personal trainer. He's helped me a lot and in the first couple of days I lost 2 pounds. But he's now gone abroad for a while and i'm finding it very hard to keep motivated.
If you have any advice... please it would be so helpful. :)

Thank you

Jessica
 
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Hello Jessica,
He is right you are better than that. Use it against them prove how strong you can be. And you will have to be strong it at sometime will be the hardest thing you may do. But you can do it and when you accomplish it you will look back and be able to thank those jerks. You can do this it will take support from people around you and you will have that here. Good Luck and be proud of making the first step. Tina:waving:
 
Hi Jessica,

First I'd suggest you read the stickies in the various forums for some information. There's lots of good info on diet, exercise, etc. for you to read.

Next, I'd say start a diary here. Posting every day will give you something to be accountable to - and people will start visiting your diary and commenting, which will give you more support.

But mostly I'd say this: stop looking for outside motivation and start making it a COMMITMENT to yourself to being healthy. Here's what I have in my diary about my thoughts on motivation .. maybe it'll help you to have a different mindset about being motivated and eating right and exercising:

A lot of people have problems staying motivated, especially when they don't see results immediately (or when they hit a stall or a dip). And a lot of people think that if they're not "motivated" all the time about weight loss and being healthy, then they're not doing it right. I used to be this way, which is why I dieted and failed for so many years.

So now my philosophy has changed. It's more of a life-plan type of philosophy instead of a rah-rah one. Here it is:

Some mornings when you get up, you feel great and you're excited to go to work or get on with your daily routine and you're energized and motivated, right? And some mornings you get up and you didn't sleep well and you feel bad or you're upset about something or you've got cramps and feel bloated ... and you really just want to go back to bed and hide under the covers. But .. you don't. And it has nothing to do with being motivated. You get up and go to work or care for the kids or go to school or whatever because that's what we do. That's what a responsible, mature adult does.

And that's how I look at the whole process of eating well, losing weight, and exercising. Some days I feel really good about it. Some days I have great ideas for what to fix for dinner and I enjoy the challenge and the gym is fun and .. it all is just GREAT. And some days I look at the yogurt in my bowl in the morning and think "Bleah." Some days I get in my car after work and think "I just want to go home" and then I drive to the gym and do my workout.

It's not always fun. It's not always what you WANT to do. You're not always motivated. But if you are honest with yourself and if you are responsible and sensible and if you have really committed to *YOU* ... you do it. Just like everything in life.
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I am sorry that you have had that experience with the teenagers. Believe me when I say that many of us have been there and experienced that.

I would say that a key thing is to believe that it is possible. Also to believe that whatever your size you can do exercise that makes a real difference. I started off by walking. In the past I had heard that walking has to be done briskly for it to be of any benefit. I knew that I couldnt do anything briskly so gave up. In my experience if you concentrate on the distance - you naturally speed up.

I agree with Kara about reading the sticky threads and starting a diary. Visit other people's diaries and leave a message in addition to seeing who visits your diary. Posting in clubs and challenges can help make friends too. Generally - the people who are more active on the forum get the most out of it. I posted a lot - but built up a fantastic support network which really helped to see me through.
 
Hey Jess, teenagers are like children... They just don't know when to shut up. As a teacher myself I know how easy it is for a kid to scream the first thing he thinks of without even trying to imagine if it’s right or wrong. Sadly, teenagers have the same mentality, usually because they want to impress friends for a quick giggle.

Let me just say that from your picture, you look stunning, and I doubt very much there is anything those kids could have said that would be true. In fact, usually they just latch onto anything. I got called mouse man once because I had a Danger Mouse tshirt on, and this was by a group of drunken teens. They wouldn't shut up with the mouse jokes for the entire time I walked past them. But you know what, it just made me think "is that the best you got, really...? I win." lol.

I hope you get the motivation you need to work on your plan, I really do. There is no better feeling than feeling good about yourself no matter how you look because then you really can be happy. You should use the fact your brother is away AS motivation, so that when he comes back he can be impressed. That’s what I would do.

Good luck!
 
hi

hi jessica
firstly,i must say u look gorgeous.about the kids screaming i wont say ignore it..i cudnt if i were you..i know how it hurts..
i have experienced the same at some point of time in my life....to add to it poly cystic ovarian syndrome makes it even more difficult to lose weight yet in the past 4 months i have managed to lose 20 lbs .i started at 193lbs and now im 171 lbs..now ive hit plateau..a member "omega" posted on my diary saying what i was doig was not probably enuff ....which i then realized was right..cos i was still walking at 3.8 -4 mph for a total o 3-3.5 miles which my body has goten used to...so starting friday i have started walking for 5 miles at 4.3 mph...she(omega) walked like for about 11 miles...which is too good...i know when u say that u dont feel motivated enuff...i feel like that too at times(many times)..i look at other skinny people and feel when i wud be like one o them..its even more frustrating when i have to try out clothes in stores i just choose an L and walk out ..i hate seeing so many varieties but not being able to fit into the small sizes...
u just need to be patient....last but not least..use criticism in a constructive way...acheive ur goals and slap it on their faces..u will feel a million bucks the day do....try reading up diaries on wlf..some are really inspiring..you will find many....
all the best
 
anita.krishna said:
to add to it poly cystic ovarian syndrome makes it even more difficult to lose weight yet in the past 4 months i have managed to lose 20 lbs .i started at 193lbs and now im 171 lbs..now ive hit plateau..a member "omega" posted on my diary saying what i was doig was not probably enuff ....which i then realized was right..cos i was still walking at 3.8 -4 mph for a total o 3-3.5 miles which my body has goten used to...so starting friday i have started walking for 5 miles at 4.3 mph...she(omega) walked like for about 11 miles...which is too good...i know when u say that u dont feel motivated enuff...i feel like that too at times(many times)..i look at other skinny people and feel when i wud be like one o them..its even more frustrating when i have to try out clothes in stores i just choose an L and walk out ..
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Just thought that I should clarify - PCOS ladies always have to work harder if they want anything approaching the same rate of weight loss as normal people. I wanted it - and the only way that I could do it was excessive exercise levels - which were not limited to walking 11 miles a day - plus rigid nutritional control. I now walk a minimum of 6.5 miles a day and continue strict nutritional control in maintenance. I had spent over 20 years in severe morbid obesity and when it comes to clothes size - I was wearing size 32 and concerned as to where I would buy clothes if I got bigger than Evans go up to (as they seem to have a monopoly for big clothes in England). I can now wear between UK size 8 and size 10 jeans - so for me it has been worth it.

Normal people should not feel that they have to try to copy my exercise levels.

I did not start off by doing 11 miles a day - but built up to it by adding more distance whenever my weightloss ground to a halt.

As far as motivation goes I often have days when I do not want to do my long walk - if the treadmill is broken (like it currently is) and it rains heavily(like it did last week) you can almost guarantee it. Indeed I did not have a treadmill for my first two winters on project... I often felt like a drowned rat - and snow/ice also tried to put me off. The fact is that when you see yourself get results that no-one would believe possible - it does motivate you to do what we do. Walking is what I do - every day...

Fortunately the rain is not forecast until later - so I will go out and do my walk soon. Today shouldnt be too bad...
 
:) A new beginning to a brighter future...

First off, I would like to say thank you so much for your kind comments and support.

I've read each comment posted to my journal and i'm feeling so motivated at the minute. I believe in myself and I really want to go ahead and make that change. For myself and the sake of my health. I'm taking each of your comments and motivational tips into concideration and i'm 100% committed to changing my life.

Thank you all again for your support. :)
 
Hey Jessica! Welcome to the forum :)
Girl your gorgeous! Those teens had no idea what they were saying at all. My mom always told me that people that do that kind of thing probably have very low self esteem and many issues with themselves they cant handle so they try to cover it up by picking on others. I have been a little overweight all my life and i still remember to this day how the kids in my grade 3 class used to call me "full moon" cuz i had a big butt. Sure it hurt, but i also laughed at them and at the age i was in grade 3 told them to shut their insecure lil mouths and get over it because i had no problem with how i looked.
Keep up your new-found motivation and commitment and you will reach your goals in no time! :)
 
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