So I had my second to last meeting with the therapist today (love her, btw) whom I have been seeing since late fall when I was dealing with the hurricane of my dad's alcoholism. I've learned a LOT from her, and she reminded me that this process of weight loss has to come from a center of self-love. Right now with the challenge I'm a part of and the lack of movement on the scale, I've slipped a little back into the obsessive part of me that used to starve myself. It's certainly not from a place of self love. That being said, today is going to be a freebie day. I'm not going to track my calories, I'm not going to worry about the gym, I'm not going to focus on weight loss today. Today I'm going to remind myself that me as I am
right this second is more than good enough. It's been very difficult for me to find this balance between self-love, attempting to "fix" something that is "broken" and completely ignoring any kind of good eating habits. I need to remind myself that yes, I'm on a track toward a healthier lifestyle, and yes I'm using a tool which helps me control my portions and nutrition, but
that is all. I'm not in any kind of a race nor do I have anything to prove, and I need to remember this fact. I am OK with me - I am learning to be more than just OK with me. I'm learning to love myself. And I can do things which are productive to that end.
So today is a day off. I will still be mindful of my food, but I'm not putting it into sparkpeople and I'm not weighing again until Friday! I hope everyone has a blessed day
PS. Natalie - or should I say "Natskie" I gotta say I love that new nic. Hehehe! Thanks for checking in doll. I know what you mean about too many diaries to read and not enough time!!!