nataliejo
New member
Happy Saturday, everyone!
So I haven't been very good with my calories for the past three days. I'm somewhat annoyed with this, but . . . . I've been doing really well at the gym, and I'm feeling good. This weekend was somewhat abberant as well since my mom and brother were here - we ordered out Friday and I kinda went a little nuts, then yesterday I ate really well for the most part, just went a little over. Same for today - I had sushi for lunch and you definitely don't realize how many calories sushi has!!! But I'm doing good things for myself - splurged this morning and had two sunny side up eggs on toast, but cooked the eggs in butter flavored pam and then used butter spray on the toast. Totally delish and absolutely a protein-packed awesome breakfast after an hour at the gym! So, true to form, here's my info for the past three days:
3/13
Calories: 2171
Carbs: 209
Fat: 78
Protein: 111
Sodium: 2944
3/14
Calories: 1906
Carbs: 217
Fat: 58
Protein: 78
Sodium: 2255
3/15
Calories: 1996
Carbs: 215
Fat: 64
Protein: 109
Sodium: 2337
Soooo not too spectacular for those three days, but I do have to say I'm still doing WAY better than I used to. Sure, I had some garlic bread with cheese on Thursday night, but then instead of ordering a huge pasta plate like I used to, I ordered some chicken breast with capers and artichoke hearts. And despite the fact that I "overate" for the past few days, I was doing some internet research and it appears to maintain my current weight, I would have to eat almost 2700 calories per day. So I'm STILL in a good zone.
Wanted to explore a topic here that my therapist brought to my attention recently - I'm still going about this healthy change with a dieting mentality. By joining the challenges and focusing on the lb change, I'm still trying to "fix" myself. So for a while I contemplated dropping out of the challenges, but then I thought 'well, I can continue in the challenges, and we'll just see what happens!' If I get kicked out of the summer solstice challenge, so be it. No problem. I'm just not going to fixate on the scale. I'm going to work on my mentality and how I think about food and about my weight and about what I'm doing myself. My therapist brought up a really good point - no matter what anyone says, everyone's body is perfect. And when you think about it, that's TRUE. Every single person's body is a perfect work of nature. The functioning of our bodies is amazing and it IS perfect. And I don't need to fix the way I look to conform to a vision society puts into my mind. If I continue on my path to being healthy and I'm still heavy, then so be it! I want to cultivate a healthy lifestyle for not only myself, but for my family. Sure, right now my family is just my fiance, our cat and the ferret, so my influence is somewhat limited to cooking for the fiance and giving the pets their kibble.But I do want to have children some day soon (by 'soon' I mean in the next 4-5 years) and how am I going to provide them a good example if I don't live it myself? I come from a history of women who lose weight by starving themselves, and subsequently base all of their self-worth on the numbers on the scale. I refuse to cave to that, and I don't want my daughter to even have that idea cross her mind. It's hard to change the way I think, and I'm definitely still struggling with that idea, but I think I'm getting there.
I was talking to my mom last night during dinner and we were discussing weight loss, and it is so hard to talk to her about what my therapist said, because it IS revolutionary and severely contrary to what society says. It was especially hard getting mom to see it because she has never thought of herself as thin. My mom is so damn tiny it makes me ill. She's maybe 5'3 and 130-140lbs. She has NEVER been fat. Her weight has fluctuated through the years but she has never been big. And she cannot see how pretty she actually is. She actually told me that she is never able to look at herself in the mirror and even think "hey, I look OK today. I got it together alright this morning." That breaks my heart because I don't think she'll ever get to feel that way, and that's just crappy. I refuse to allow that mindset get to me and I WILL NOT base my own self-worth on my weight.
Anyhow this is an insanely long entry so kudos to those who read it!
Hope everyone has a great weekend.
Heather,
Your therapist is so right on. I think you are right on, with changing the mentality and thank you for writing that, cause it made my day lol
To think we are all perfect with our bodies, that its apart of nature. I think everyone is different.. our bones ect. Everyones body shapes. We are all so different in so many ways, but have the same goal ..
thanks for the great post
and congrats on the weight loss!!
206.5 is awesome Heather!! Way to go!! Whoot Whoot!! Keep it up gal!!
Your doing so great. Who cares if you gnosh a little extra, you are well on your way!!
keep trecking hun '
love yas
your friend
always
natalie jo
Now I just try to exercise everyday and watch my portions and get as much protien as possible (it keeps me full). The big catch word is TRY to get exercise. I don't beat myself up anymore if I miss a workout, I don't have to as my body really lets me know that I have to get back to it. I guess I'm an adrenaline junkie now!
You are lucky to have such a great therapist to help you work through your troubles. Good going with your lifestyle change, Keep going!
It you are on the right track and doing great!
