Happy and Healthy - That's Me!

happyandhealthy

happyandhealthy

New member
Hi everyone,

I'm happy and healthy! Or at least that's who I am going to be :hurray:

I've had a difficult couple of years and in that time I have gone from being 58kg, young, bubbly and adventurous, to being 98kg, (feeling) old, lazy and boring.

I've realised that I can let my misfortunes rule me and stay this way forever, or I can do something about it!

So here I am. Ready to make some changes. Ready to re-discover that young and happy person who is the REAL me!

:party:

I am 5'2 and currently 98kg.

My long term goal is to lose 43kg (my god!). 55kg is a good weight for me - looking healthy but still with a little bit to cuddle :) If I could be there this time next year that would be amazing, but I'm not really going to set myself a deadline, so long as I continue to make progress.

My mid-term goal is to have lost 20kg by August 5th. That gives me roughly 26 weeks which I think is realstic - if I can do it faster, wehey!

My shortish term goal is not about weight, but about fitness. On the 28th of June I want to be able to run non-stop in the 5km Race for Life. I have 20 weeks to prepare so I have modified the 5km and some of the 10km training programs from the BUPA website. I will train 3 times a week, and on the off days I will try to get some other exercise such as yoga or pilates or even just a nice walk. When my fitness has picked up a little in a few weeks time I am also going to start swing dancing lessons!

I am starting my training at the gym on monday. My focus for the next few days is to start eating healthy. I'm not going to set myself any calorie targets just yet, I just want to focus on retraining myself to make better food choices. Emotional eating is a big problem for me. I want to learn more about what triggers my eating and ways to overcome that, but if I do end up reaching for the food I want it to be nutritious food that I reach for, not processed junk.

In a few weeks time once I have adjusted to a change in diet (much less artificial, processed food is my main goal) and my training program I will start aiming for 1800 calories a day. At the moment I eat an average of 2500 - 3000 a day so that will be a big enough change to begin with and I can adjust it depending on my progress.

Well....here goes!
 
So, several days in and it's been a mixed bag. I'm not expecting miraculous changes - at this stage I am learning about myself and taking baby steps, that's the way I'm likely to make any changes long term.

I would say I made a 50% increase in positive food choices.

For example - 2 days ago for lunch I made myself a delicious toasted sandwich with pesto, spinach, mushroom, tomato and feta. Normally I would just have 2 minute noodles...so wow...what a difference! It was such a nice lunch and took bout the same amount of time to make. I've also been sure to have a good breakfast - cereal and a bit of fruit does the job.

I won't lie - I have ballsed it up already, but like I said - if the positive choices are happening, the negative ones can slowly been weaned out.

My biggest hurdles are a) emotional eating b) habitual eating c) influenced eating

a) getting frustrated with my boyfriend or the lack of help around the house sets me off to the shop to buy junk. I need to find another way to channel my frustration.

b) being alone. When ever i'm alone, it has been my habit for the past year or so to go to the shop and buy junk food to eat all on my little lonesome. It's gotten to the point where I feel like i'm supposed to do it when ever I find myself alone - that' definitely a habit I need to break. Also, at about the 8.30pm point (half an hour before the shop closes) I find myself anxious - should I take this last opportunity of the day to have some more chocolate?

c) Eating what my boyfriend eats. Things like "let's get a pizza!" my answer should be NO!!!!! You can have pizza, i'll just have a sandwich. But it's worse when he buys me a "treat" - I feel guilty if I don't have it, but once again, if it is too much of an excess (obviously we're allowed little treats every now and again!) I have to learn to say NO!!!!

I am recognising these patterns, so that's good. Now I just gotta do something about it.

The easiest one to break, I think, will be the habitual eating when i'm alone. I have a task force of hobbies at hand to throw myself into at the first thought of chocolate - music, painting, study, reading...if I can keep myself busy I am far less likely to succumb to the urge.

It's a new dawn, it's a new day...and I'm feeling good!

Here's to a happy and healthy sunday :party:
 
Yesterday and today (so far!) have been really good!

I made good food choices yesterday, with lots of vegies and very little processed food. I was pleasantly surprised last night when I calculated my calories and finished up with a 350 defecit! Nice work!

This morning I started my training at the gym. It's been so long since i've put on my gym gear, I thought my chest was going to implode when I squeezed into my sports bra! haha...hopefully that will ease off pretty soon; current cash flow doesn't permit for a splurge on a new one!

I ran 1 minute, walked 2 minutes on repeat for 20 minutes. It was a nice easy start, just getting back into the rhythm of things. I also did some weights and a while on a bike. In total (according to the machines) I burned around 300 calories.

Now, the rest of the day is my oyster! Here's to a happy and healthy monday!

:hurray:
 
Thanks for the well-wishes! And I love working out in the morning. It really sets my day into motion. Best of luck on your journey!
 
Welcome to the forum :). Thanks for reminding me to pack my gym clothes when I leave for work (seriously, I believe I would've spaced that out had I not stumbled onto your diary). What are you in pounds? Most of us do lbs so you sound totally anorexic hehe.
 
Haha, well trust me, i'm far from anorexic! 98kg is about 216 pounds, my goal weight (in the long and distant future) is 55kg, about 122 pounds. A long way to go!

Glad I could be of help with the gym gear :) I'm always shocking like that too!
 
Well, yesterday went okay. I went a bit hell for leather on the bikkies at the end of the day but I still managed to come in below maintenance calories, which is my main goal at the moment. Mostly good food choices - a delicious beef salad for dinner - very yummo!

Today's training has been put off to tomorrow as the gym flooded - ha! Just what I need...but they say it should all be up and running tomorrow so I'll be there with bells on. I recruited a friend for my 5km run which will make a big difference. It's always nice to have someone else on board for encouragement!

Well...off to enjoy my wednesday!
 
Ooooh! I just weight myself and it said 96.9kg - that's awesome! I've been consistantly on 98.2kg for about 2 weeks now so it's nice to see a bit of a drop!

I know I shouldn't get into the habit of weighing myself too often - but I couldn't resist after a couple of positive days!

:party:
 
Okay...bit of a major blow out yesterday! But that's okay, it's only one day in this long journey of mine, a blip on the radar!

It started because I was up all night writing an essay (and last night as well! yikes!). Come 4am I was crazy hungry so I went for the left over lasagne. Then I had a small breaky at 8, but by 1 I was hungry again and went hell for leather and cooked a curry. Come 8pm, dinner time, hungry again. Had Spag Bol (but with vege mince so no where near as bad as it could have been!). Staying up late throughout the night again saw the emeragnce of the chips and the chocolate. Ah dear....

But ... it's only one day! Whatever man!

I slept until 12 today which makes it easier to eat less, haha! Doing me essays but feeling confident that I wont be tempted towards the dodgy food choices. It'll be a goodun today!
 
Friday turned out pretty good. I ate well during the day, but come 8.30 I was battling my brains against the urge to go to the shop. I caved. But I managed to keep my junkish intake to a minimum level. I finished the day about 250 cals under maintenance so that's good. I'm still retraining myself (which will take a while!) so immediate weight loss isn't my major priority.

Then there was yesterday....

The day went fabulously until about 4pm when valentines day kicked in. A box of chocolates, some hoisin duck pancakes, singapore noodles and 2 glasses of wine later I found myself about 650 cals over maintenance.

Oops!

Today is sunday and i'm about to head off to the gym to get back into positive mode and keep my training going for the run in June. I actually skipped one session this week due to ludicrous amounts of university work, but I think i'll be okay coming back in to todays program, I was finding it pretty easy going to begin with.

So...Happy and Healthy! Woohoo!
 
YAY! I just got back from my training session (just a quick one!).

Even though I had skipped a session (and put off this one) I was able to stick to it 100%. I kept the rest of the workout pretty light as i've got another session tomorrow. You're meant to have rest days in between but because of my hectic week I can't so I didn't want to over do it today.

So that's week one done and finished! YAY!

Next weeks training is as such:

A) Run 2 min, Walk 2 min X5 22 min
B) Run 1 min, Walk 1 min X10 22 min
C) Run/Walk 1.6km

As well as that, next saturday my friend who I am doing the race with is coming round to go for a run at the park at the end of my street. She's a lot fitter than me so she's going to have to be patient! We're going to do that once a fortnight. I'll keep track of how many laps I can do and hopefully they go up a lot over the next few weeks!


Feeling good!

:party:
 
Phew! I'm pooped!

Just got back from the gym and i'm really happy because I did my running training again! I managed to get through it all but my god, I thought I was going to die in the last session of running! Just think of the amazing things it's doing for my body :)

After my running I did a pretty solid weight training session. I know from past experience that keeping the weight training up really helps with my running. After that I did 20 minutes of pretty intense bike riding.

A good work out over all! As the weeks go on i'm going to build up my ruitine so that I include more and more cardio with the rowing machine, and the weird arm bike thing they have at the gym...haha.

Yesterday went amazingly well! I got to the end of the day and added up all of my calories and I was 795 under maintenance! The bit that amazes me is that it was the first day that I hadn't been thinking about it all so much; I just ate when I was hungry. Maybe all of this re-training my brain is starting to kick in!

:hurray:
 
Well today was a bit of a mixed bag really.

I did a good workout and my calories were low (355 below maintenance) but most of the food I ate was crappy and artificial and I feel horrible for it.

I had doritos and 2 minute noodles and icecream and diet coke and all of the chemicals from them are coursing through my veins and my brain giving me hell. I did have some good veges as well, but I think i've really realised just how aweful those other foods are...I used to eat them none stop every day and this is what they do to me! Man! What was I thinking!?

I think i've learnt a big lesson today that I can take with me into tomorrow and the next day. Knowing just how shit those foods make me feel will make it all the more easier to reach for the healthier food when ever i'm hungry!
 
Don't beat yourself up over what you ate today.

You'll be back on track tomorrow.

We all have a bad day now and again.
 
Okay, so I think it's time that I set some targets for daily calorie consumption.

Online calculators have given me crazy irregularities for maintenance levels - from 1745 right up to 2550. The average seems to be 2200 so i'm going with that (I am 5'2, 216lbs, 24yrs, desk job just incase anyone wants to help me out here!).

I would like to start losing 1.5lbs per week. This would require a defecit of 750 calories per day.

Therefore, my daily calorie consumption should be 1450 calories. This seems low, however on the days that I exercise (a minimum of 3 days per week, aiming for 4 or 5) I can increase the amount of calories I eat by the amount I estimate that I burned at the gym. So if I burn 500 calories during a work out I am allowed to eat 1950 calories that day. I should pretty much be alternating between exercise days and rest days so my body should be happy enough for me not to go into this "starvation mode" that everyone talks about.

I will try this out for a week or so and then re-assess. If I am feeling too hungry or too tired I will change my goal to 1lbs loss per week. It's better to lose slowly than be miserable!!!!

I would really appreciate feedback from the more experienced "losers" (haha) as to whether or not my goals sound realistic and achievable.

Thanks guys!
 
happyandhealthy said:
I had doritos and 2 minute noodles and icecream and diet coke and all of the chemicals from them are coursing through my veins and my brain giving me hell. I did have some good veges as well, but I think i've really realised just how aweful those other foods are...I used to eat them none stop every day and this is what they do to me! Man! What was I thinking!?

I think i've learnt a big lesson today that I can take with me into tomorrow and the next day. Knowing just how shit those foods make me feel will make it all the more easier to reach for the healthier food when ever i'm hungry!
Click to expand...

I completely agree with this feeling. Whenever I eat a lot of things out of a package, I feel noticeably more sluggish and less-satisfied.

Good luck with the week!
 
Thanks for making me feel less guilty about my stuff up yesterday guys! I know it's only one day and in the grand scheme of things it's not too bad!

Well....as for my new plans, i've already re-assessed them! haha

Upon further consideration I decided that 1450 calories per day is just too low for me. I know I wouldn't be able to maintain that, even with the extra calories on exercise days - those off days would just be too hard!

So - with the same goal (1.5lbs per week) i've just re-shuffled the numbers.

I HAVE to go to the gym 3 times a week for my running training. I burn at least 300 calories per session. So i've added them up (900) and split it by 7, adding the number to each days calorie allowance.

That means my new daily calorie allowance is 1595 (i'm going to say 1600 because it sounds much more satisfying!).

Any exercise I do on top of those 900 calories each week I can use the extra calories for a nice dessert or drinks on the weekend.

I think that sounds MUCH more realistic and achievable!!!!!
 
It's amazing how you can be feeling so positive and doing so well and then it can all turn in an instant.

I had a wonderful positive and very healthy day, right up to 7.30. Then I went to cook dinner and realised that instead of washing the dishes last night my boyfriend had stacked them in his bedroom so they were "out of the way." So there was nothing to cook with. That god me grumpy and when I had a go at him he started screaming at me that I should have f-ing done them and on came the fight.

Fights with my boyfriend are the only time at the moment when i'm struggling to keep my ED at bay. As soon as he gets me tense I start stuffing my face full of food. In stead of having the nice healthy salmon and veg dinner that I had planned, I had two salami sandwiches (great weight loss choice there...salami!), a 55g packet of doritos, a mars bar icecream and a couple of chockie bikkies.

I was so mad with myself afterwards. THAT is my biggest battle - controlling those intense, emotional binges. I've worked through it all in therapy, I know why it happens (I shouldn't be with him anymore because he is SOOOOOOOO wrong for me) but I can't change that at the moment for financial reasons (Yay...money rocks. Who invented that shit?). That's why I still binge. In other areas of my life i've learnt to control it which is amazing...it's just that.

Anyway...it wasn't a total disaster. Binges in the past have seen me 4000 cal +. I managed to keep this reasonably under control. I finished the day on 2345 cals which, IF my maintenance really is 2200, was only 145 cals over.

I am serious about my ED recovery and about weight loss. In the past a set back like that would be the end of me, but now I am determind to make this journey with a total acceptance of myself and a total acceptance of the mountains i'll have to climb along the way. That's what will make it all the more amazing when I get there!

So, I am still positive! As I think i've said a few times already....today is a brand new day! I'm off to the gym in a few hours to do the 2nd day of training for this week. I'm also going to try to step up my level of cardio with a target of burning 500 calories (roughly, just according to what the machines say) all up.

My target for calorie consumption is 1600 and I AM going to do it today (see...positive!).

Here's to a happy and healthy wednesday!
:party:
 
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