General hysterical diet related rambling: From Flab to Fab.

AYes...where is our rainbow....are you nursing a hangover??? Hope you went out and had some fun you deserve it!! XXXX
 
AI am very hungover. Only had three hours sleep last night so I am exhausted as well. I'll come here properly tomorrow.

The night didn't go well. I don't know how I am going to manage going out again I was hyperventilating all day just thinking about it and I was shaking when I got there. It was horrible going to pick the kids up this afternoon. And I am going to feel the same going to college tomorrow. I am just too paranoid that people are looking at me in disgust. I have decided that I am going to get cheekbone implants as I have no cheekbones at all. And that is coming before the tummy tuck. I know you will all say I look good etc... but you haven't seen me in real life. I am really fucking ugly. And I just want to look normal.

I have eaten atrociously.
 
AWhy did you have such a horrible time?im sorry you feel so bad,did someone say something about the way you look?I was really suprised about you wanting cheekbones...I will say what you said we would say.that you are pretty,how much different can you be in real from your photos.?they are not photoshoped or profesional shots.
Is it something you have wanted for some time?i cant remember you mentioning this before.
 
AO my dear buddy!! Please stop beating your self up so much!! You don't deserve it!! You are not ugly!! I think you are beautiful...you have that stylish european classy look with a splash of pixie with a dash of rock and roll!! I envy that about you....I would love to look like you!! I love your whole look!! I think you have a lovely soul and a lovely face!! I don't know how you could think you need anything done to it!!
 
Im sorry the night was horrible Ruth, but as Jasper said, what about the night made it horrible? I think you are gorgeous hun, inside and out:) Please dont get cheek implants on your face, you will look so fake with them. YOUR A NATURAL BEAUTY.


i hope you cheer up soon girl, please dont go quiet on here:(


hugs xxxxxx
 
Wish you wouldn't talk about yourself like that--makes my tummy drop when I read things like "I'm so fucking ugly." You're BEAUTIFUL. Tell yourself 5 times a day--Once with each morning sit-up! You can lose all the weight in the world, get all the cosmetic surgery that you want, but if you don't love yourself then it will all mean nothing in the end. You'll just find the next flaw to move onto. Hope you feel better soon, beauty xx
 
A:(
:iagree::iagree::iagree::iagree::iagree::iagree::iagree:
You are beautiful. And you really don't need cheek implants. Really. :( I wish you could feel as beautiful as we here know that you are. And don't do all that 'you haven't seen me in real life' business. I know that the pics I put on here are actually a pretty realistic version of me, and that goes for everyone. I wish you had someone to tell you how beautiufl you are, and who would make you feel beautiful every day. Then you would not ever even think about your eye bags or a tummy tuck or cheek implants - you are you, and that is gorgeous. Imagine you are outside your own body and you are someone else looking at your pictures - how hot you look, how rock-chick awesome, how artistic and full of flare you look. You're gorgeous.
 
Originally Posted by Sunflower


Wish you wouldn't talk about yourself like that--makes my tummy drop when I read things like "I'm so fucking ugly." You're BEAUTIFUL. Tell yourself 5 times a day--Once with each morning sit-up! You can lose all the weight in the world, get all the cosmetic surgery that you want, but if you don't love yourself then it will all mean nothing in the end. You'll just find the next flaw to move onto. Hope you feel better soon, beauty xx
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Awh sunflower you hit the nail on the head with that. Ruth please believe all of us YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL. I just want to slap sense into you. Sunflower said this son well!:) Hope your feeling better girl xxxxxxxxxx
 
A:iagree: :iagree: :iagree: :iagree: :iagree: :iagree: :iagree: :iagree: :iagree: :iagree: :iagree: :iagree: :iagree:

I can't think of anythng to say that everyone else hasn't said. I wanna grab you by the shoulders and shout at you :cuss: You are not in a good head space right now, i have been there, so so been there. I really get the self loathing rant but like everyone tells me YOU ARE WRONG
I don't know whether i have told you this before but when i talk about you to Mark he says 'is that the hotty in London?' He thinks you are really sexy!!!! I think you are really sexy Everyone thinks you are really sexy!!!!! So please start believing us.

If this continues i will get on a train and turn up on your doorstep and do the shoulder shaking and ranting.

We all love you and hate seeing you in such a bad place. It breaks my heart sweetie. You deserve to be happy cos you are FUCKING AWESOME!!!!

I'm on the end of the phone if you need to rant, sound off, cry, ANYTHING!! just let me know if you need me.

Love and squishies, (Mascara, snot and all)
 
Ahey rainbow where are you lady?come on and tell us about uni and stuff!Hope you are feeling better,miss you!
 
A:iagree::iagree::iagree: Please, Ruthie! You must listen to us!

Ive been thinking the whole morning here what to say to you about the implant crazyness.. I think surgery is always bad, no matter what it is. You should definitely not have any kind of implants, and if I was you I wouldnt do any other surgery either! I can only wonder what some kind of implants would do to the nerves in cheeks, the sense of touch would probably dissapear? It isnt good for you. And you know you must find the happiness in other ways! Ive same kind of problems, low self-esteem and dont like the way I look. We all have these problems. You really are beautiful, like we all are, believe it!
 
AThanks everyone, but I really look like a man. I am always getting mistaken for a man. That's was happened on my last proper night out and caused me to become a bit of a hermit and it destroyed my life. I thought that maybe I would look better and more fanciable losing weight. But a bloke roared in my face "Trannnnnnny" on Saturday.

I am ugly. I have a huge head, a long face, a wide wrinkled forehead, low eyebrows, tiny eyes, oily nose, bad complexion, huge eyebags, no cheekbones which makes my brow bone look more prominant, chubby lower cheeks, a wide jaw, and horrible teeth. And that's just my face, don't get me started on the rest of my body.

I am a bit calmer about it now, I seem to be getting used to being accused of being a man a bit better now. But I think that one feature that all good looking people have is cheekbones. Leona Lewis has a long face and small eyes like me, but she is pretty because of her cheekbones.

I have felt a bit suicidal really. Although I wouldn't kill myself because of my kids. Its weird how one little word can devastate me so much. I have been through a lot in my life. So why is this hurting more than almost any of it? Why is being pretty the most important quality to have? Why do people judge others based on there looks like its the only important thing and everything else is just optional?

I honestly just feel like crawling under a rock somewhere and hiding. I don't want to go out because I am scared that if someone says "Is that a girl or a guy" one more time I will be broken so badly I will never be able to repair myself. It took so much for me to go out to a house music place, then my worst fear happened.

I am going to put my student loan money I am getting now, and the lot I am getting in January towards cheek implants, in February. I want to be at my goal weight before then. It will cost quite a lot, because I would not go abroad to get my face done. I want to be able to have consultations with different surgeons in person before I make up my mind. I want to be sure they are properly registered, and I want to be able to talk to past patients from England properly.

I think I will feel loads better with cheek implants. Even if I still get mistaken for a man if I feel prettier than I do now maybe it won't matter to me as much.
 
You thought you'd feel better after losing weight. And after having your eyes done. That loan money is towards your studies and to financing yourself throughout uni--I think you will look back and regret this horribly. All of us have had horrible things said about us--I got called small eyes and cauliflower (because of my hair) all of high school and even when I came to uni. Cheekbones wont make you more pretty. It'll leave you surgically enhanced forever and probably still hating yourself. I really think you should wait--Re-asses when you've lost your weight and see how you feel then. If we all thought "Mannnn, I hate this part of me--I'll just get cosmetic surgery done" then we'd all be walking around a lot poorer, a lot more fake and probably just as unhappy as we were before we got any work done.


Sorry for being harsh but I really feel that you need to snap out of this mind-frame. It's so unhealthy. Beauty is only skin deep, Ruth. Focus on improving your self-worth before attacking parts of your body that don't need changing. I'd like bigger eyes, less frizzy hair, the bump to be out of my nose--But those things make me who I am. And your imperfections make you who you are.



And we all think you're fucking gorgeous.
 
AAww sweetheart, I can't believe you had to go thru that again. There are some fucking vile people on this planet and you seem to end up bumping into them.
YOU DO NOT LOOK LIKE A BLOKE!!!!!!! We had had this conversation before so i won't go there. You need to go to the doctor and sort out someone you can talk to. You life is all over the place right now and you need some support to get back on track.
Are you talking about using your using your student loan for surgery and quiting uni? You can't do that hun, you really can't throw all of it away. Talk to someone sweetie, you can get help. Don't do anything rash!!

Love and squishies. Xxx
 
Totally agree with Sunflower and Kate. Sunflower nailed it though. Hun you have to be strong and use your cop on. YOU DONT LOOK LIKE A MAN and YOU DONT WANT TO GO AND GET SURGICAL ENHANCED CHEEK BONES.


That guy was an utter scum! i hope your feeling abit better hun



loads of hugs xxxxxxxx
 
That's horrible. I saw your profile pictures and you look like a beautiful woman. But just wondering: where do you live exactly? If you experience this every time you go out, maybe it's not you; it's the asses around you. Move yourself to a more family friendly location and let all the negativeness go away.


But I do highly recommend you not go with the surgery. Love yourself!
 
AO hun....nothing any single one of us say is going to make you feel different or better...only you can do that...you really do need to talk to someone in person who can help you!! you deserve peace of mind!! you have worked so hard for your body,.....now you need to work just as hard to fix you personally!! you want to instill confidence and pride into those precious children of yours...and they learn from example...be that example...take the money and get some help.....please take care of you!! you have me worried sick for you!!

I wish I could fly over right now and hug you and take you out for a proper good .....happy and fun drunk!! xoxoxox :grouphug:
 
rainbow,i am so sorry you feel that way.I agree with everyone else you DONT look like a guy and YOU are pretty,i have told you that from day 1.

Msybe grtting implants will make you look fake.I think you must try and get your self esteem up,and try find what is thereal problem , cause from what we see its not your looks.See with your eye bags we where all "yeah go for it" but this is taking things really very far.

Please write on here and tells us about how you are doing and eating.I miss you loads
 
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