Feeling like throwing in the towel...

Pinky2

Pinky2

New member
This is mainly me venting out some anger, but at the same time i was wondering if anyone else feels the same or has the same problems.

It takes ages to loose weight, but its so easy to put weight back on. Ive spent my whole life dieting, and finally i am seeing some results, but are the results ever going to be enough. Am i ever going to be able to look at my naked body in the mirror and feel happy with what i see?

Some friends of mine were lecturing me yesterday. Aparently i have become obessed with my weight. My argument is how can i not be when i am one of the heaviest in my circle of friends. Besides.. its not all about looseing weight its about becoming healthier. However they believe im wearing myself out.. running myself into the ground. While i can see their point of view, due to the amount of work we seem to be getting essay wise :)() i could be doing a hell of a lot more in terms of exercise. It would mean less sleep and a little less socialising perhaps and much better time managment but it could be done.

I spoke to a male friend of mine about it, and he suggested that my female friends are jealous of the fact that im so motivated to do something about what i don't like.. But they shouldn't be! Besides... ive always said i would do it with them if thats what they wanted. BAH!

Also.. friends are not to be relied on when it comes to dieting. Ive noticed y best friend has been.. not supportive in the sense that she will offer me things which i know i shouldnt be eating. argh argh.. *bangs head against the wall*

Sorry for this post.. i really needed to vent out some anger. I woke up this morning thinking what the hell am i doing and nearly reached for a bar of chocolate. At least writting this post has stopped that. haha :eek:
 
Hey girlfriend you are doing good and I am so glas you came here and didnt take the candy bar! As for your friends they are jealous it seems because they could be excercising with you while you were socializing with them! You may need to spend more time with your guy friend hehehe he seems more like he is supportive and knows what your going through! Just lay it on the line to your friends that they can support you or you can not have much time for them either!
 
Poor thing, I"m sorry your frusterated! You have 2 choices, give up and in time gain the weight back, or keep going. I know it frusterating, I'm feeling similar to how you do, but I have decided to switch my thoughts to more productive things, while still keeping dieting in the back of my head. Still watch what you eat, count cals or what have you, but only at meal time, dont' allow yourself to sit around and think about it all day. You have a life that needs lived Pinky! Lets get to it!
 
New Bride is SO RIGHT. I am probably one of the top most frustrated, wanting instant gratification person out there, and it is a mind set that you have to CHOOSE. You chose it already by being here and venting (which dont apologize for!) and joining the challenge. My dad always told me: 'change the way you think & you'll change the way you feel' -corny, yes, but it truly works... Keep it up, you'll be where you want to be in no time!!
S
ps- welcome to team rave! :)
 
Hey Pinky! First I'm sorry that your friends ARE not more supportive. Secondly, don't strain yourself trying to figure out why, there could be so many reasons. The point is, you are doing this for you, not them! It would be a lot easier if you had them backing you up in what you were doing, but unfortunately it doesn't seem that way. My guess is that they may not be jealous, but they may not fully understand if they have never struggled with their own weight. Do whats best for yourself and your health, before you chose to do something to appease others. As a big people pleaser myself, I know what its like to try and keep everyone else happy.

The only other thing I'll note is that, be careful with school, exercising, and eating healthier that you aren't over doing it. I don't mean by missing socialization you are over doing it, just, don't spread yourself too thin and get sick or something. :) That would be my concern for you. But I wish you luck in finding your way on this path, and hopefully your friends will come around to support you. Perhaps letting them know the best way they could help you, is to support your new lifestyle, not critque it! :D

Good luck girl..and yknow what.. you've got ALL of us here to support you!!
 
Pinky I think we all have been frustrated at one time or another, just this week I got on a scale for the first time and couldn't believe how much weight I put on. Then you watch something like the Biggest Loser and yes it motivates people but all I do is cry and say why can't I do it, my fiance has to keep reminding me that they didn't lose it in 2 weeks they've been doing it for 6 months. You are doing so wonderful and unfortantely friends aren't always the most supportive but I don't think they realize what they're doing all the time either. Maybe try talking to them and if that doesn't work maybe ask yourself are they your true friends. Just remember you have a whole group here that loves you and supports you :)
 
Pinky, you do need to talk to your friends and let them know that you need more support from them. However, also look to yourself. Are you always obsessing over every calorie that everybody eats? Have you started talking about nothing but losing weight? I know that I have done that. You have to balance things. Yes, pay attention to what's going on, but don't forget that there are other things in life too!
 
I know that what they say is true.. i have become obessed about dieting. Im always checking calories on things, and double thinking before i decide to eat something or not. But im trying to change my mind set.. im not dieting.. im being healthy. Its just taking a long time. I want to loose the weight quickly.. but i know the only way i will do that is by regular exercise and making sure i eat little but well..

I just don't have the motivation to get my arse into gear. Like i should have walked to and back from uni everyday this week.. but i think i only did it a couple of times. Its a 30mins walk.. if i did that everyday then i wouldn't have to fret so much about not going to the gym when things get busy.. would make life easier.. but i just find it soooo boring! :( Im going through a rough spot of when i can't be bothered to do it all anymore. But people keep telling me that i look better.. and i can't give up now because im getting sponsered.. and the fact that my grandad died recently, and its mostly for him that im doing this.. i got to keep going so i get my sponsership. It just takes so long! :(:(

It just irritates me that it takes forever to loose the weight.. and then you will have a blow out weekend where you just don't care anymore.. and what took you weeks to get rid of, you suddenly put on in two days! you know what i mean?

But thank you for your kind words everyone.. makes me feel a little happier.
 
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Oh girl, dont I know!! I did so well, and at christmas I was at 182..the lowest I'd been in FOREVER...well, one day lead to 3 wks, and here I sit at 188!! UGH!

But better than letting it get us, lets fight back!!
 
I think one thing that has really helped me is that when I do work really hard and I have a bad weekend, just get right back into gear... you will find in a few days that the weight has come back off and it's ot really something to fret about... as long as you are staying consistent (and not obsessive ;) )

you also might want to try to find out if any of your friends would be interested in joining a workout class or going to the gym with you... or find somene to walk to school with... having a buddy in the process (even if it isn't one of your best friends!) helps so much, and you don't feel like you are always missing out on socializing time...
 
Hi, Pinky,

I totally understand what you're going through! I've been there quite a few times! I can gain 5 lbs in a week and it takes me MONTHS to loose it! AND, ever since I started dieting again seriously, my husband keeps telling me that I'm overly obsessed. But its easy for him to say when we started counting calories for 1 month back in July and he dropped 10 lbs, I dropped only 1 or 2! But at the same time he is right - I keep talking about weight loss and calories, and I dont put anything in my mouth without calculating in my head or out loud what it is. Don't worry about what others say - if you need to count calories, do so! Do what you need to do to accomplish your goal. All in all being aware of what you eat is a very good thing. If you stick to it, overtime you will do it instinctively without having to be so obvious, and you won't appear as "obsessive". Having said that, I also agree with not "spreading yourself too thin" part. If you exhaust yourself, you won't be too healthy at all! I am speaking out of my own bad experience, so be careful and make sure you get plently of sleep and rest!

BTW, welcome to RAVE group!
 
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