Feeling like a failure.

M

musicisthecure

New member
10 days after starting my diet, I lost three pounds.

Nothing I could really notice but the scale told me that I did.

One really crappy day after class I came home and had an ice cream cone. It was all downhill from there.

The next day I had a bite of cake.
Two days after that I had about 12 cookies.
Last night I had french fries and a mocha frappuccino.
Today I had cake. For breakfast and for lunch.

I don't know what to do. I feel miserable and hopeless, and like those three pounds came right back as soon as I even looked at that ice cream cone.

Sure I can control myself and kick my ass at the gym and do it all with a smile for a week or so...but I can't seem to do anymore than that. And now the last 12 days of all that hard work are ruined.

I don't even know. :rant:
 
Well, I'm sorry but you just got to start over. It's never too late. Don't worry, it's not like you gained 100 lbs or anything, so starting today or tomorrow, get back on track with your diet.

Also, keep in mind that some people feel that eating a little bit of junk food every now and then will control their cravings, other people (like myself) feel that it's best just to avoid them altogether. I think you may fall into the latter category as well. You could try avoiding all sweets and fattening foods completely. It has really helped for me recently and I wish I did it earlier. I've been able to be binge-free for a little more than a month now. Basically, since sweets were my absolute weekness, I told myself no sweets unless I am offered some. And even when I am offered it, I tell myself only one serving.. Good luck with everything and don't give up!
 
Cravings are in the head, not the stomach. What I usually do is have a 'treat meal' once a week. Anything I want for one meal, once a week. It helps to control the cravings and it gives you something to work towards but you have to have the willpower after the meal to get back to eating healthy. Don't give up.
 
I would actually say that you are seeing the health-kick side of things as being too 'saintly' and 'pure' and so when you do well and a week has passed you naturally want to reward yourself and enjoy something tasty. This is why I agree more with ChealseaJoe rather than Missy08. Absitinence is really hard! And not very natural.

The fact you've documented it so honestly and want to change is great, so I am confident that you can do this again. Nobody is 100% saintly 100% of the time - we are human! So don't beat yourself up! Now get back on the wagon again and forget last week. And avoid those evil ice-cream cones :Angel_anim:

Sky
 
i read in a book that is not good for you to weight your self the first month you are in a diet because if you get on a scale the first week you may loose 1 or 2 lbs and you tend to think "oh nooo all that work in a week and only 1 pound" so if you wait a month you will see a biger difference and that is good for the autoesteem and you would not fail
 
Maybe you don't really want to lose weight enough. People will change when they want it badley enough and it sounds like maybe you just aren't in the right mind frame to... if this happens after every week or 2 you start a diet. Yeah it's hard, that's why so many people are over weight, you just gotta decide if you really want to work at or not.
 
Just remember that this is hard. There are a lot of us in your shoes and we're here to help support one another. I have such a long way to go it is daunting...but...dammit, I am determined this time.

You CAN do this.

For what it's worth, when I have the craving for something, I come HERE, to this site and look at the before and after, and diaries. I realize that I am not hungry, just bored.

The other thing that is helping me is that I went to fitday.com and I write down everything I eat. I have heard you should do this for years, but this is the first time I ever have done this. At least for me, it helps.

Hang in there!

Jim
 
I have been there....I think alot of us have.Last week I ate almost a whole pizza, 4 slices for lunch and 3 for dinner, and I still lost 2 pounds. You need to learn to forgive yourself, put it behind you and move on. So you had an ice cream cone....okay, next meal make a healthy choice. It's a slow process trying to change your habits. If you can make one healthy choice a day in the beginning, it's progress. The next day, make two. A slow conversion will last much longer. Just lose the all or nothing mentality. One little slip up like an ice cream cone is what, 400 calories....it takes 3500 to make a pound.....it's not gonna break you. Celebrate what you did right. Dwell on the good, let the negative go. I know its hard, but try....it really does help.
 
Oh well. It's happened. Time to start again.

You aren't a failure. How have you failed when you haven't really had an opportunity to have a go yet?

This is trial and error. Each time you will be stronger. If you slip up again it will be smaller. Eventually you will get it.

Don't give up. You deserve to be healthy and happy. Tell yourself. Look in the mirror and say it. Tell your friends and family. You can do it!
 
here's a thought...

you're in the kitchen unpacking groceries...

you drop one egg on the floor...

Do you say -oh (insert profanity of choice here) and then drop the rest of the eggs on the floor as well while crying?

Nope -the normal person will clean up the mess of the one egg dropped, put the rest of the dozen away and keep going about their business...

Clean up the one bad egg you dropped and keep going...
 
Last edited:
maleficent said:
here's a thought...

you're in the kitchen unpacking groceries...

you drop one egg on the floor...

Do you say -oh (insert profanity of choice here) and then drop the rest of the eggs on the floor as well while crying?

Nope -the normal person will clean up the mess of the one egg dropped, put the rest of the dozen away and keep going about their business...

Clean up the one bad egg you dropped and keep going...
Click to expand...

What a nice way to look at it!
Great analogy.
 
Don't Give Up

I know exactly how you feel. I just started my diet two weeks ago. I lost 2.5 lbs the first week and nothing the second the week. I was really annoyed. All that "deprivation" for nothing. I too had the urge to just stuff with my face with everything that I was craving. I didn't do it because I took out the swimming suit that I plan on wearing in about 8 weeks and stared at it for a while. I had my "free meal" a little early for the week though. And, I admit that I didn't exercise for two days because I thought it was the exercise that built muscle making the scale not budge this week.

But the point is that there are plateaus and set backs in any new program. We all mess up. We all eat more of something than we should. We all skip exercise one day when we just don't feel like it. We all get tired of something in our program. But it is just one day (or two or three). So what! If it were easy, everyone would be doing it. Don't give up. Every minute that you stick with it and every time that you start again or get back to your program is a victory.
 
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