Fat, Ugly, and Depressed

G

GreatDepression

New member
I don't have a unique story. I came to this site hoping to get help. My name is Andy and I am 26 years old. I was an obese child who grew into an obese adult. Food became a friend because I had no real friends.

Where should I start at this site? There are a lot of sub-forums and I am confused since there are so many topics.

My heaviest weight came last December 2012 when I was 255 lbs (116 kg) with a BMI of 39, on the brink of morbid obesity.
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As of today, I weigh 225 lb (102 kg). The weight loss has been slow and difficult. I still feel and look hideous but I have hope that I may be able to enjoy my life somewhat in the future. I want to be able to wear a nice outfit. I want to move without becoming fatigued so quickly. I want to have the courage and self-esteem to find myself lovable.

Why have I allowed this to go on for so long? Why is letting go of junk food and binge eating so hard?
 

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Welcome to the forum.

You are NOT ugly. You do NOT look hideous.

Well done on the 30 pounds that you have lost this year. You are doing great. :hurray:

It does take hard work - but you can do it... You can make your weight loss dreams come true.

Food is a false friend. It is a fuel that our bodies need - but it is not a friend.

Do not expect yourself to be perfect with your avoidance of junk food... But - if you try you will eat a lot less junk food than you used to eat...

Distraction can be helpful when it comes to stopping to binge...

Practice making friends on the forum and I suggest that you also practice talking to people in real life too... Making friends does get easier with practice. You can do it!

I suggest that you read the following thread - it may help you settle in and make friends
http://weight-loss.fitness.com/threads/57955-My-advice-to-newcomers

Good luck with your project.
 
I agree with Omega. You aren't ugly, or hideous at all. You have already made a difference in your life by admitting that something needs to change, and by starting that change. You went further by coming here, looking for advice, looking for friends, and you already lost 30 lbs. You are doing pretty damn good from where I am standing!!! You should be proud of yourself for achieving what you have already done. I mean that.

Weight loss is a difficult road a lot of times. It can be hard, and slow, and frustrating. A lot of us have been there. I certainly have, and still am, every day. But you have a good start - you know what you are doing it for, what you would like to achieve. And it's worth it in the long run. Ask the people who have lost a lot of weight, like Omega for example. I'm sure she will tell you that in the end, it's more than worth the effort. :)

If I were you, I'd look around the forum. See which topics interest you. Almost all sections have sticky posts, containing some good information. Also, have a look at the diaries. There are a lot of very inspirational ones out there, which will let you know that you aren't alone in this. There's a lot of people feeling the same way, struggling just as much as you do. Maybe even start a diary yourself, if you feel up to it. That's how I would start. :)

Welcome to the forum, and fingers crossed for your weight loss journey!
 
It is worth it - and you can be smarter than me...

I only sorted out my weight problem in my late 40s...

I spent too many years telling myself that it was too hard and giving up...

I wish that I had stuck with it and maybe been thin in my late 20s or my 30s or my early 40s for that matter...

I'll turn 54 next month and now I am dancing and enjoying myself like I wanted to do back then...

You're 26 and can have a healthy weight - feeling good about yourself in your late 20s...

My max BMI was 52. If I can do it - you can...

Do it!!!
 
You're not ugly. And you'd be surprised how attractive an overweight person can become over the course of their weight loss journey. That's another thing that can give you tremendous amounts of motivation.

You hang in there and you'll be surprised at how much you're capable of.
 
As people said you're not ugly at all, no idea where you get this idea from, I've started 2 months ago and was at the same state as you are right now ( 115 kg ) and now I'm at 98 kg and I can tell you not only your body changes but your face changes a lot too, the differences are really significants, keep going on your way to the handsome goal :>

Don't give up.
 
It does take time to get a response.

People are scattered all around the world and are busy with many things: work commitments, families and their own weight loss projects... Quite a lot of us end up doing quite a lot of exercise...
 
A great tip is to visit the active diaries... You can get into some good conversations there...

Check out that link I posted before of advice to newcomers... it really does help in making friends - but it takes time...

I know that people are just starting up a weight loss for July challenge that you might want to join.

I see that you have made 5 postings in total now - 2 of which are in this thread... In my opinion - make quite a few more postings than that before you get despondent...
 
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Thank you for the responses. I feel very ugly and that's been affirmed by years of bullying in school. Food became a friend and it's hard to push him away now. I've changed my diet rather drastically starting 12 days ago. I've been doing well albeit for some under-eating. Many seem to think this is what leads to binge eating sooner or later.
 
GreatDepression said:
I've been doing well albeit for some under-eating. Many seem to think this is what leads to binge eating sooner or later.
Click to expand...

That's why I have a cheat day every week where I can eat whatever I want. That day has stopped all binge eating attacks and has helped me immensely in my weight loss. It makes me train extra hard and helps me keep my diet clean during the weak.
 
You're not ugly (as countless others have said). I USED to think I was ugly, I would look at myself in the mirror and criticize myself and I too felt so depressed. I felt like I was the slime of the earth, but than one day I decided that I couldn't afford to be that person anymore and you can to! It will be a long journey, but don't EVER give up! There will be set-backs and hard times, but knowing that they will pass and tomorrow is another day is something to definitely keep in mind. ;)
 
You're a cutie--don't call yourself ugly! Go to the diary section and make a diary! You can post all your food/exercise/feelings and day to day stuff. Lots of us post on there--I tend to avoid the rest of the forum unless I have lots of time to spare as all my friends are in the diary part :)
 
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