Failure.

M

Mandieleeann

New member
I am afraid it has come to this. I need to publish what I eat in order to control it. I absolutely had 4 pieces of pizza 6 chicken wings and two diet cokes for dinner today. For some reason I find it completely impossible to not consume what is put in front of me. I fail. And I am absolutely terrified of looking up the cals on my fucking feast :( I feel so disgusting right now and I'm starting to get hungry again. :(
 
Don't think of it as failure but as a starting point, we all have setbacks and bad days but unless you give up your NOT a failure.
 
I think titling your journal "failure" is a great way to insure that you do .. in fact ... fail.

I'm not trying to be harsh or anything, but I am pointing out that as long as you say you can't, then you won't be able to.
 
Oh goodness, I've eaten far more than that in one sitting. Indulging, indulging, indulging. The insanity of most overeaters. Failure shmailure. Call it what you want. But understand one thing: you don't need to publish your binges, you need to publish your journey, feelings, and PLAN for success.
Since 2006 I have seen some of the largest people come on this site and generously share their journey of weight loss over a sensible amount of time, some of them two whole years. Did they have setbacks along the way? You bet they did. But sucess isn't defined by the absence of failure, it's defined by how many times we keep on trying the best we can. If you really want to succeed, you will. I hope you'll re-title your journal and that you'll stay on this site because you will be in good company.
 
Thank you all for your kind words :) I know that you are right about setting myself up for failure by focusing on that. But for some reason I find that being brutally honest is the only thing pushing me forward. I am a chronic justifier and try to weasel my way out of any sort of accountability about what I eat. I tend to try and convince myself that its ok to eat more than I should be in order to loose weight. Saying that I worked out in the morning, or I've been loosing all month I can splurge a little here and there. And then It gets out of control. I gained 2.9 pounds from that binge (plus some nachos later in the evening) It seems like I have to eat under 1200 in order to loose anything the next day. I''m sorry if this was ranty, I'm just very disappointed in myself. I have been doing good up until last night. But your comments have made me feel better. I'm starting fresh today and so far have only had 1 cup of all bran cereal, and a green tea. (310 cals) Now let's see how well I do for the rest of the day. Scratch that. I am going to do amazing today! :seeya:
 
Mandieleann,

You know, I have to liken myself to a crack addict. Food is my drug. My biggest weakness is fast food. I may tell myself "I'll just stop at _______ and get a salad or grilled chicken sandwich" or whatever other lie I may tell myself. But reality is, when I get there, I have absolutely no control. There's no telling what I'll drive away with. Then when I finally realized that it wouldn't make sense for a crack addict to stop by a crack house to say "hi"...or borrow a cup of sugar....nor does it make sense for me to think I'm strong enough to do ANYTHING. Until I develop healthy habits, I can't put myself in bad situations where I may fail.

Plan your meals ahead of time...don't give yourself opportunity to weasel. Develop healthy habits. After a while, you can add some flexibility when you've learned how to control yourself.

AND...today is a new day...you can't change yesterday, so don't worry about it. We all fail...there's no shame in having failed.

Hope you have a blessed day!
Fit
 
Mandieleeann said:
I gained 2.9 pounds from that binge (plus some nachos later in the evening)
Click to expand...

The fact is that 3500 surplus calories (over and above what you burn through living and exercise) is needed to make one pound of fat. If you calculate out the calories in your binge - the chances are that it will be a lot less than 2.9 * 3500.

I absolutely had 4 pieces of pizza 6 chicken wings and two diet cokes for dinner today
Click to expand...

Calories in one KFC chicken wing from calorie count...
180 calories per wing.

Calories in Pizza Hut Super Supreme per slice - 305 calories
Calories in Dominos ultimate deep dish per slice - 366 calories

Calories in diet coke - negligible - I drank it all through losing weight...

So - we are looking at no more than
4 * 380 for pizza and looking on the high side of calorie options
plus
6 * 200 for chicken wings - again on the high side of calorie options

1520 for pizza plus 1200 for wings = 2720.
This is not enough to gain a pound of fat - even if the rest of the food that you ate in the day takes up your entire calorie allowance for the day which would be a fair bit higher than your standard burn because you exercised.

The surplus weight will be far from all fat.
A lot of food of that type is high in sodium. That causes water retention. Some of the surplus will be water which is retained until you drink enough water to flush it out.
The food and liquid has weight in your stomach until you go to the toilet too...
Some of it will be laid to fat.

The best thing to do is to aim not to do it again too often, drink plenty of water and try to eat food which contains less sodium. Eating less processed food is generally a good idea.

Beating yourself up over such transgressions never gets anyone anywhere...
 
Oh wow! Thanks for the reply very informative and...wow! I absolutely love this site. There are so many helpful and friendly people! And you are totally right about the fluid and food weight. I need to remind myself of that and maybe wait till I go to the bathroom before I weigh myself..lol The sodium is also a big problem for me. I am a salty food junkie. I could not eat sweets for the rest of my life and not care at all. I don't even like sugary foods, but salty anything...oh man. I was doing really well with drinking more water and that was most likely why my weightloss was going so well. But I'm out of water for my water cooler and am terrified of drinking tap water lol. But today I am getting two more jugs so that will make a huge difference. I can't stress enough how good this forum makes me feel :) :seeya:
 
You are welcome. :)

We all have bad food days. I have lost a lot of weight - but I had a really bad food day just a few days ago. Believe me - the calories that I ate that day make your binge look small... None of us are perfect. The trick is to see it as an incident and not a change of direction. Consider yourself a success because of the good days and the fact that you are trying to improve your health - not a failure because of the occasional bad day.

I cannot tell you how many times I gave up on attempts to lose weight because I felt so bad about having too many calories on one day... It really makes me feel silly now...

Drink lots of water. We all love salty food - but recognise it as the weight affecting thing that it is for many of us. If you are going to feel tied to the scale as a measure - try to persuade yourself to not have the salty food. Forgive yourself when you do - you are only human.

BTW in April 2008 I had an abdominal operation and was on a saline drip for 3 days while not allowed to eat at all. I knew that it would affect my weight (I had already halved my start weight so had a good feel for how my body worked). I came home and weighed myself. In three days of nil by mouth (but sodium dripped into my arm) I had gained over 8 pounds...
 
SEconding what Margaret said. :)

Would suggest that you get in the habit of weighing yourself first thing in the morning, before you eat anything for the day. Weighing after you eat is useless really, because you're also weighing the food in your stomach.

If your "baseline" is taken on an empty stomach, before you've exercised, etc., then it's a more accurate number to get a consistent reading. It'll be easier to see when you've gained and lost.
 
KaraCooks said:
SEconding what Margaret said. :)

Would suggest that you get in the habit of weighing yourself first thing in the morning, before you eat anything for the day. Weighing after you eat is useless really, because you're also weighing the food in your stomach.

If your "baseline" is taken on an empty stomach, before you've exercised, etc., then it's a more accurate number to get a consistent reading. It'll be easier to see when you've gained and lost.
Click to expand...

We had a funny thread on weighing Kara...



:)
 
I always weigh myself first thing before I eat or anything, and that was what upset me the most. But I think I'm going to wait until I go to the bathroom before I have breakfast and before I weigh myself. That way it will be as accurate as it can get. BTW I went out all day and did very well with not stopping for food! I had a very small handful of barbecue chips my mom was snacking on and a large coffee. I even stopped at the grocery store for some things and didn't get anything at the hot food counter! This may seem like a small feat but I have pretty much ALWAYS grabbed something at the hot food counter. Hungry or not. It is a habit that I am struggling to break. Especially since they don't have any idea what is in anything they sell. (Believe me I have asked) But this may be TMI, but I did go to the bathroom and must have gotten rid of at least 2 pounds of food lol So I'm feeling alot better. I also got my water jugs filled and feel much more hydrated. I'm feeling a lot more positive and truly thank all of you for being so kind :) I think I found my new home :blush5:
 
If you check out that link - you will see that I have been known to focus on that toilet weight LOL...

I am pleased that you are feeling more positive now. Well done for being strong willed. Lots of little moments of success like that can add up and make all the difference in the world.

Dont have too high an expectation of yourself. That way leads inevitably to eventual disappointment. No-one is perfect. We can just try to be good.
 
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