I read an interesting article in Oprah's magazine last night that really got me to thinking about this whole weight loss thing.
It was about this book that a lady wrote, and the author was talking about how losing weight has little to do with weight. She goes on to explain how even if you lose weight you're still going to be miserable, if you continue to ignore emotions. Just as an alcoholic or sex addict will still be miserable even if they quit their habits, but don't confront their emotions. I know that I am butchering this lady's words, if anyone can get ahold of the April issue of O magazine definitely read it! It's fascinating.
Last night I went in the kitchen and I got my little measuring cup, and I got the ice cream out. And I measured me out some ice cream, so I could stay within my calorie limits. Like a zombie I did this, without really thinking about what I was doing.
And I had to stop myself. Well I kinda stopped myself, I still ate the ice cream, lol, but I realized that right before I went into the kitchen I was thinking about finances and a few other things that stress me out. And I was like shit, that article was right. Here I am getting ice cream so I won't have to feel these emotions that I'm having.
She goes on to say how we don't necessarily have to FIX the issues, like for instance, I don't necessarily have to FIX my worries, I just have to embrace my worries instead of trying not to feel them. People have gotten so used to hiding emotions or trying to escape a feeling, when the right idea is to just sit and feel your emotions.
She said that the food is the parent. The parent that is there for you, that is listening to your emotions, the one that tells you that everything is going to be alright. Just the way alcohol or sex is to other addicts.
And the more I think about it, the more I think this is just so true. I do embrace food as sort of a parent. I never noticed this before. I have always heard that food was an emotional escape, but I never really thought about it in this way before.
The author said to give the feeling a description when you are having it. So if I'm feeling worried I can say, "I'm worried, and it feels like a ball of rubber bands in my belly" or something. And to just sit and feel the worry until it goes away.
I am definitely going to try to understand myself better and my triggers for food, and then I'm gonna try to not run away from the feeling. If I'm feeling worried, I'm gonna call up a family member or a friend and tell them about it, instead of trying to tell the food about it.
