Does this ever happen to you?

R

rottengirl

New member
So I have been doing fairly well and am feeling good about my progress over the past three weeks... 7 pounds..woot woot!
In conversation with my boyfriend if he talks about next summer or next year and he talks about buying clothes for next summer when I have lost so much weight... I second guess my self...
Right now my goal is to lose weight for Cuba in December, and I will be really happy to lose 30-40 lbs for that trip... but what happens after that?
The last time I lost weight with a goal in mind, it was my first wedding. I lost 50 pounds and then slowly but surely gained it back...
The second guessing comes from..the idea that I might gain it back... I am committed to lose the weight for Cuba, but I haven't quite commited to keeping it off for life!? Don't get me wrong, I don't want to be fat, but you all know how much work it is and I totally hate and resent that I have to deal with this FOREVER!
I know it's a lifestyle change but will my sweet tooth and lack of will power, over power me when I don't have a concrete goal in mind?
Does anyone else second guess themselves this way? Am I bound to gain again?? I know it's a mind set, how do I make up my mind?
Maybe a little bit of philosophy for y'all?
Would love to know what people think?
Thanks
~P
 
I haven't let myself think past Christmas yet...I know I will feel the same as you though. I'm committed right now, but the idea of doing this for the rest of my life scares the crap out of me.

One goal at a time.
 
I agree...after so many times losing the weight and then just putting it right back on....I feel scared that this will be just another one of those times. I guess we can only take it one day at a time, one obstacle at a time, one challenge at a time. I mean think about addicts or alchoholics...much like we are addicted to food ...they must face each day as a new day... a new challenge and a determination to succeed. I guess we are the same in more ways than we think! I can only speak for myself that although staying thin is my long term goal....I can only face one day at a time right now, or I become way to overwhelmed.
 
I agree, if we think about this diet as 'I'll get down to my goal weight and then I'll be able to go back to eating like a normal person' well, you will gain all of your weight back. It's better to decide now that you can never go back to your old habits, but it is possible to start new ones. Once you've made your goal, then you can slowly add a few old favorites back in--but this time you'll know better! You'll know when to stop, you'll know the right portion, you'll be able to adjust your calories so that a small treat doesn't cost you a pound or two. Knowledge is great thing.
 
Oh I hope your right babe!
I thought I knew those things the last time... and here I am doing it all over again...
sheesh:rolleyes:
 
I have never really dieted before, so I don't think about putting it all back on. I started going to the gym about a year ago, went off and on. Stopped binging, but never really made the commitment to eat well the rest of my life. When I did decide to do it, I knew it was going to have to be forever. That is why I keep my calories higher than many people do. I will fail if I have to eat 1200 calories a day for the rest of my life.

In my mind I am always talking about how I only need food for nutrition. The food I love to eat will always be there for me when I want it. I still eat chocolate every week. I refuse to give it all up, but what I do now is plan for it. If I know I am going to eat heavy I eat light the day before and the day after. If I had to deny myself It would not work. I don't know if you have traveled or not, but when you go to European Countries, the amount of food they bring you on a plate is amazingly smaller than what you get in a restaurant in the United States or Canada.
You can eat everything you want, just eat less of it. I also work really hard at cutting out emotional eating. If I'm eating because I'm sad or mad or bored I will never be able to lose weight, so I focus on that as well.
If I don't do those things, I know I will gain it all back. I never thought about it as a short term solution. I am really big on short term goals though. Maybe you just need to keep the short term goals lined up. They don't always have to be about losing weight. The can be about exercising or eating a salad everyday for lunch etc....just all things that keep you on the right path and in those summer clothes you buy next year!
 
I so agree with everything Pineola just wrote!

I don't think of denying myself now, I eat what I want, but now, I understand portion control, I have a better understanding of moderation then I did 45+ pounds ago. A CAN of pringles crisp/chips is NOT a single serving ;)

It's the one reason I prefer counting calories then being on a "diet plan" I refuse to feel like a Failure for eating what my family is eating or having dessert. What is important is to learn how to incorporate those things into a normal every day diet.

So my long range, life long plan, is to always be aware of calories/portions with many short term goals along the way.
 
here here! totally seconded
I refuse to fail by denying myself the foods i love. I would rather learn to eat smaller meals or offset something fatty like chocolate with a soup for dinner etc.
 
I agree...I can't deprive myself of everything I love, or this would never work. I let myself have dessert after supper if I want it. And since I know I can, I actually haven't had it for about 4 days now. Amazing how that works!
 
so true, to me eating is one of lifes pleasures, I mean we all get together for luch or celbration dinners breakfast meetings all involving food ect. so i can't imagine my life without ever eating a ho ho agian, but not today or right now, maybe next week when i have done good for a while (uh oh i guess now i am thinkiing of food as a reward maybe :confused: not good) the point is all things in mderation and know your limitations (still learning mine) goals are always good and when you reach your goal weight do like Pineola said make some new ones like eating a salad everyday or somthing, good stuff here.
 
I appreciate things that were written in this diary. Thank you.
How many calories a day are most of you sticking with? A website that I have been using as a guide suggests that I cut down to 1200 daily. So far, so good.. but I don't want to live like this until Jesus comes.

You all plan 'cheat' meals.. or days.. or whatever? I'd be interested as a newbeeee. Thanks for your input.

I hope that it is okay that I ask these things in this diary. Not sure else where to ask.

Good day,
Steve
 
you dont have to stay on 1200 forever - just until you get to your goal weight. Then the secret of maintaining that weight is calories in are the same as calories used. So if you workout more you can eat more. The average woman i think uses 2000 calories a day.
Even on 1200 a day I manage to slip in cake and chocolate at least once or twice a week. It may be a sacrifice on another meal but its just the thing to make me forget that im on a diet.
 
Rottengirl
GREAT JOB!!! on the 7LBS
now as stated portion control
as a part of my speech i gave at my Tops meeting this past thursday
try this when its time to eat put just a little bit on your plate ad eat that checwing about 20 times per bit and then when finished with that sit back and relax and after a few minutes if you are still hungry get alittle more
but if you will notice you are actully full after the very small portion you put on your plate
 
Did I read in another journal that you've quit smoking like 9 months ago or something? In some ways it's the same philosophy.

I quit 5 1/2 years ago now. When I had first quit, I used an online support group for that too. And one of the most helpful phrases was "One day at a time". The thought of quitting for the rest of my life seems so daunting, so difficult, so hard. I hated the thought of depriving myself of cigarettes for the rest of my life. But if I just worried about not smoking "today". Right now. I'll worry about tomorrow, tomorrow. All I really have right now, is today. That goal was doable. Now, 5 years later, I can't imagine ever smoking again!

So, don't think about how you'll handle the future. Worry about today. How will you handle a craving? How will you handle stress? How will you manage your time for exercise? One day at a time.

You can do it!!!!:)
 
:D I'm quite happy to think i've gotta watch what i eat and exercise for the rest of my life... after all i've spent the last 36 years getting this fat, i might as well spend the next 36 enjoying being slim! (and i WILL be slim!!)
 
I agree that you can't cut out everything you love, what would life be without the things we enjoy?

I seem to do very well during the week b/c it's easier to stick to a routine. But I fail miserably on the weekends! I've found that if I bust my butt all week. that I can take the day off on Saturday. I don't workout, and I eat whatever I want. As long as I'm still eating 6 small meals. If I want a waffle and bacon for breakfast I have it, I just limit myself to one and a few strips of bacon. If I want an piece of cake for dessert, I have it. I just take it easy, and ya know what I feel much better for it.
I actually want to start fresh again on sunday. And I don't ever feel like I'm denied anything. I just don't crave as much during the week, of course it still happens though:p . This also makes it easier if you are used to going out with friends for dinner, or family dinners where you are not in control of what you are served. I know this won't work for everyone, but I've found it to be quite helpful to just rest for one day. But if you don't think your'e ready for a full day try just one meal a week, it really lifts your spirits. Especially when your'e used to low fat high fibre low sodium yada yada yada food the rest of the time.:) Take care everyone!
 
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