Diary: Curvie Girlie: A Yo-Yo's Reformation

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You can do it CG. I know it's harder when you get down close to your goal weight. But you're HALF WAY THERE 14 gone 14 to go. YES
 
your goals aren't trivial - they are important to you...

your friend has gotten a rough deal in life but sounds like he's really made the most of the life he has... that should be the lesson learned -to really live life to the fullest and try to be all you can be.. (which you are dooing by getting to a healthier weight and feeling better about yourself)
 
Friday Kiss Off

Ok, today:

Bfast: cereal, soymilk, strawberries, blueberries, soy yogurt on the side=360
snack: Granola PB bar=160
TREAT: 1 serving Cadbury Mini-Eggs--a breakthrough for me--not more than 1 serving all day! YAY! =190
Lunch: Sandwhich with all the fixins, hummus, mustard, avocado, lettuce with herbs, Dubliner cheese and fresh garlic!=600

total:1310 so far

1 walk to the beach with the office dog in the sunshine for 35 minutes=250 calories burned (I ran around a LOT)

Now I just have to limit my alcohol tonight and eat mindfully for dinner and NO MORE TREATS
:eek:

Wish me luck! happy Friday!
 
CG, I feel for your friend Chris, but your wish to live a healthy life is far from trivial. And it is so important you are doing it now, while you are still young. Otherwise, you will just keep gaining weight until you're my age, when obesity really does become life-threatening.

Have a great Friday nite & weekend!
 
in response to the day that you seriously cut your caloric intake: you have to understand that the weight circuit that you are doing burns a LOT of calories and that the "sweating profusely" will make it so your weight drops dramatically (from water weight). You have to tailor what (and how much) you eat to what you're doing. I am sure there are a lot of people whose diaries you are reading that don't put in the activity that you do. Therefore cutting their intake more drastically is how they combine exercise and diet. You should feel a little taxed after you lift. BUT if you have been doing this circuit for awhile you shouldn't be TOO uncomfortable.

and drink a LOT of water.

also a suggestion: if you are lifting like that you are obviously focusing a lot on building muscle.. might I suggest inserting a HIGH protein snack within 20-35 minutes of your workout. Your body needs that protein to rebuild (and expand) your muscle... you probably already knew that... but.. just a thought.

glad that everything is going good for you!!! :D

Rene
 
Weekend Debauch

Whew~!

This weekend was FUN-FILLED and ACTION-PACKED. So much that I have a cold, now--and the weather is warm and sunny! Well, warm for the central coast in winter, so like 65 degrees. Anyway,

Friday night! Oh here we go...

"Girl's Night" in San Fransico on Friday started with a Czech dinner--because I was watching my calories, I ordered a garden salad and had it with 2 small pieces of Czech bread. I ordered a beer, though--Lion's Black, and it turned out to be 16 oz. The girls (my friend Alana and her friend Emily) ordered larger dinners and puzzled over my salad but I didn't want to get into it. The bithday cake came, but it was all buttercream, and I HATE that stuff, so I had a bite and left the rest. We then set out on Pacific Ave to serach for...male strippers. I came to Sf unaware that that was the objective of the night. As it turned out, there were only girl strip clubs, and apparently the male ones "catered to a different crowd" if you know what I mean ;) So we saw 3 cops on the corner and I asked them,
"Do you know where all the male strippers are at?"
They laughed.
I said to one cop, "OK, how about you do it, fifty dollars, right here," and they were still good-natured, but had to run across the street as something was going down.

OH! I have work to do, I'll finish this later....:p
 
Friday night Debauch, cont.

Anyway to continue
(BTW, thanks for stopping by, Be Gone Soon, Mal, daiseeangel, and renelynn!)
Us girls walked by this one bar/club, and the bouncer stopped us and was like, "Free cover for girls, and free champagne"
Well, he didn't have to holla twice, so we went in and the place was pretty much empty, and we drank champagne and started to dance a bit as the place filled up. I put my whole body into dancing, and tend to go to my own rythm and forget that anyone is around. Well apparently that sort of makes a decent dancer because people started complimenting me on my dancing moves. I had 3 small glasses of champagne--all free! Ridiculous!

We went into the next club, which had a $5 cover, but when we got up to the 2nd floor there was a like, Mexican-style oasis waiting for us. A table was covered with a delicious spread--chips, wonderful salsa and guacomole, and 4 shots of tequila with lime. I looked around, saw no one there (although the dance floor was right there and it was packed), and started to eat some chips. the salsa was divine, the guac absolutely fresh with sprigs of cilantro (I adore cilantro). The girls and I wondered aloud why the hell no one was there. When someone came back, they heard it was Alana's b-day and so, "Go ahead, have it all."

Remarkable, isn't it? Like a godsend, right? Well, we all had a shot of tequila, and they went up to dance. I sat for a minute and then Alana said I took the 4th shot left over after thinking about it. But my memory was fuzzy at that point. Anyway, I got up to dance, with a salad, some bread, a 16 oz beer, 3 glasses of champagne, and 2 shots of tequila in me.

I know.

Well, I started to get very drunk, but I was dancing up a storm, and I remember that I was the livliest person on the dancefloor--until I noticed some guy dancing. I started to dance with him, and he was all about it. And he was HOT, too. We were all into it, as I proceeded to get really drunk in the process. When the music stopped I think he was trying to talk to me but I was too plastered and just left, to find the girls and leave. I actually forgot about him while standing there. It may sound rude, but I was on the verge of a blackout, you see. And I know it was all MY fault, but I like to think it was all the fault of my diet--you see, when you go out drinking it's probably a good idea to fill your gut with alcohol-absorbing food. It's certainly fattening, but that's why I ordered a salad in the first place. So I over did it. Sigh.

The last memory I have is of going into a porn shop to look for male-based porn for the hell of it. All we saw were women, and I was chatting with the propietor like, "why is that?" when Emily found a "rape" porn. She started to get mad, and Alana too, but Emily was so mad she was like, "How could you even sell this stuff??" And apparently I said, "Oh then, well, sorry buddy, looks like we have to leave--the girls hate your rape porn, so we gotta go, but thanks for trying to find gay porn for us, have a good night," and we went home.

Tact is not for Girls' Night, nor is it for San Francisco on a Friday night. I'm sorry.

Once at ALana's I drunkenly prepared a cinnamon raison bagel with wheat germ oil in a drunken desparate attempt to soak up some alcohol. I barely remember it but I cut a small piece of my thumb off in the process. Calorie count? Like 3000. :(

Saturday Alana and I spent recovering, watching Sex and the City (I never seen any before) and napping, then Saturday night I went out again to Planet Gemini in Monterey with my friend Trisha and her new boyfriend, and her friend Phoenix whose birthday it was at midnight on the 4th.

To celebrate my 14 lb weight loss and the fact that I lucked out and don't suffer from cellulite on my butt and thighes, I wore an über-mini skirt to the show, mainly because I was way too hung over and ashamed to dance that night. By ashamed I mean I danced inappropriately with a hot guy, and I have a loving boyfriend who chooses not to come out with me (he's more reclusive than I). Of course he doesn't know, and I didn't step the line or anything, but he'd rather not hear about it. And I wasn't planning on dancing again anyway (my head was pounding).

Well, apparently I looked too good that night, because 6 guys literally begged me to dance with them--even the owner complimented my outfit and asked me if he could buy me a drink. Well, anyway, I actually had to get up and ask the bouncer to tell a guy to leave me alone--because I told the guy 10 f-cking times I wasn't going to dance and he was still buggin me, trying to touch me and stuff. I have never been assaulted before, and the fact that he was in my face, invading my personal space and not taking "no" for an answer freaked me out. So I will never wear a mini skirt to that place again, and probably not ever in public again! Shit!

SO this weekend, I got several compliments--I'm a good dancer, I'm pretty, I looked good, I was hot and sexy, etc., from friends, strangers, and my boyfriend and his mom (of course, it depended on who it was, what compliment was paid). I was flattered, but I don't really like excess attention, and since I'm not particualrly vain, and since I have a high self-esteem, the compliments didn't mean that much to me and I was pretty much embarassed instead of pleased. And at the comedy show I was mortified and miserable. It's nice to be considered attractive but it sucks that so much emphasis is put on appearance.

Anyway, I have homework to do--have a great night, Readers
 
Gonna do it!

Ok, so I had a 3000 calorie day on Friday, about 1000 from alcohol.

I'm not bummed out in the slightest--I know I can lose at least 5 lbs this month--but my objective is EIGHT! I upped it because I feel I have an even tighter hold on food

I started the Month at 145 lbs on March 1st. Now I'm 143, but I'm sticking to the 144 I weighed March 2nd because I suspect the scale is not reflecting my true weight--perhaps water or glycogen loss is to blame, I don't know. Also, I have noticed that my weight drops right before my period and then shoots up 4 lbs for days 22-6. It really sucks--I know I need to drink even more water and watch my salt intake but it still happens.

Anyway, I want to be 137-140 lbs by April 1st.

Oh God! :eek:

That's so amazing! It's in my sight! Breaking the 140-139 barrior! It's almost too good to be true! I'm so happy! Can you imagine? Being under 140 lbs? If you are already, I'm sure it's good. But really folks--

under 140 lbs!

I have not since October 2002. That was almost 6 and 1/2 years ago. Six and 1/2 years, being a chubby bunny. Well, I sure had a great time, I tell you!

You know what, though? I don't waste my emotions on regret, but to tell you the truth, the delicious food I gobbled down and over-ate...it really wasn't worth the pain and me crying in the shower over my stupid weight. Now that I realize that, I can indulge in moderation, and stay on track. I ate 2 cookies today (Girl Scout thin mints--only 75 cal) and stopped there, thinking, "these don't taste that great. It's really not worth it--I could spend the calories on something nutricious AND delicious."

I have to keep that in mind.
 
that's a big obstacle i still have to work around - reminding myself that if i really don't like something - the it's not worth the calories...
 
i used to give myself every excuse in the world to eat whatever i wanted to... i stuffed my face all the time! i am slowly but surely learning that almost everything is ok in moderation. that's my problem... the moderation part! :)

i'm sure being under 140 will be an amazing feeling. you'll know soon enough! :)
 
maleficent said:
that's a big obstacle i still have to work around - reminding myself that if i really don't like something - the it's not worth the calories...
Click to expand...

Tell me about it! And I read that food stops tasting as good after so many bites, and I didn't believe it until I realized it was true--after paying close attention to what I was eating. That's the trick, at least for me--paying close attention to exactly what I'm eating.
 
daiseeangel said:
i used to give myself every excuse in the world to eat whatever i wanted to... i stuffed my face all the time! i am slowly but surely learning that almost everything is ok in moderation. that's my problem... the moderation part! :)

i'm sure being under 140 will be an amazing feeling. you'll know soon enough! :)
Click to expand...

Thank you! :D You've come a LONG way--look at you! Stick with it, you have 100% of my support, here. :eek:

Moderation has ALWAYS been a problem for me--and obviously it still is, with alcohol, sometimes. It sure is fun to tear up the city once and a while, though!

I'm really glad that I can be 95% Angel and 5% Devil and still succeed--but for this month I think I better listen to the Angel on my shoulder ;)
 
Hello, you are doing great! 14 down and 14 to go eh? I agree that moderation is the key to a lot of things. I tend to overindulge somewhat at the weekends with alcohol too, working to cut it down is hard. I like to remind myself of the fact that red wine is pretty decent and I tend to drink it more slowly so that's always good! I don't like drinking it when I go out though cause I get the red wine stains at the corners of my mouth! Keep up the good work!!! Rachie :)
 
Rachie said:
Hello, you are doing great! 14 down and 14 to go eh? I agree that moderation is the key to a lot of things. I tend to overindulge somewhat at the weekends with alcohol too, working to cut it down is hard. I like to remind myself of the fact that red wine is pretty decent and I tend to drink it more slowly so that's always good! I don't like drinking it when I go out though cause I get the red wine stains at the corners of my mouth! Keep up the good work!!! Rachie :)
Click to expand...

Thanks! Hey right now we're at the almost same exact BMI! YAY for us!! Looks like our goals are similar, too. Yes, red wine is the ticket! I have plenty at home on account I work in a winebroker's office, it's just when I go out partying, beer tends to be cheaper (unless it's free champagne, heh heh). Thanks for droppin a line! Best wishes to you and your goals :D
 
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