Desperate... :(

EB847

EB847

Banned
As You All Know By Now, Life Isn't Going So Well For Me.

I Still Have C Cups. Brad Is Using My Ex-girlfriend Like Ron Jeremy In His Prime. I Crapped Myself Benchpressing The Other Day Right Next To The Only Woman At The Gym That Doesn't Appear To Have External Ovaries. What Next?

All I Wanted To Do Is Better Myself So I Could Get A Wickid Hottie. Should I Give Up Or Try And Muster Some Dignity And Pursue Physical Perfection?
 
fatgurrlnomo said:
where did you get that picture at???
Click to expand...

FUNNY STORY... THE GIRL IN THE PIC (MY EX,EX) WAS NOT AFRAID OF FILM IN THE BEDROOM. WE SET UP A TRI POD AND TOOK THAT ONE. AFTER OUR WILD AND, DARE I SAY, PAINFUL LOVE MAKING SESSION, THE CAMERA WAS NO WHERE TO BE FOUND.

A MONTH LATER, AFTER A HOMETOWN BUFFET BINGE, SHE HAD TO GO TO THE DOCTOR TO REMOVE A WAYWARD CHICKEN NUGGET FROM GOD KNOWS WHERE. DURING THE VISIT, THE DOC LOCATED AN OVEN MIT, A HALF ORDER OF CHILI CHEESE FRIES AND, YOU GUESSED IT, THE CAMERA. THAT WAS THE ONLY PIC THAT SURVIVED THE ORDEAL. :(
 
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Dude..you kill me.. I love reading your stuff..you are a fricken riot.

Wow..anyway.. Dont lose hope man..you have to keep trying! I havent given up yet..you cant! well, you can, its a free world..but dont! its not worth it..
 
SON, YOU FLATTER ME. I'LL BE HERE ALL WEEK UNLESS SOME UPTIGHT BUNGHOLE MAKES ME DISAPPEAR. :rolleyes:
 
EB847 said:
SON, YOU FLATTER ME. I'LL BE HERE ALL WEEK UNLESS SOME UPTIGHT BUNGHOLE MAKES ME DISAPPEAR. :rolleyes:
Click to expand...

Thats what your camera said!

On a serious note, chicken nuggets are for internal use only.
 
Im not a "son" im a woooman..but thats cool...
I do hope that no "real" chickens were injured to send this message...
Unless the chicken had fun doing it...
 
stoptheexcuses said:
Im not a "son" im a woooman..but thats cool...
I do hope that no "real" chickens were injured to send this message...
Unless the chicken had fun doing it...
Click to expand...

PARDON ME, I DIDN'T KNOW YOU WERE A BROAD. I MUST HAVE ASSUMED YOU WERE A DUDE, WHEN YOU REFERRED TO ME AS A DUDE. NOW GET OFF THE INTERNET AND GO VACUUM OR SOMETHING. ;)
 
stoptheexcuses said:
Im not a "son" im a woooman..but thats cool...
I do hope that no "real" chickens were injured to send this message...
Unless the chicken had fun doing it...
Click to expand...

I'm OK.

Breathe easy. :D
 
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