Dandelioness's diary

Dandelioness

New member
I'm new here. This looks like a friendly, active group and I'm glad I found it. I'm hoping to get some motivation and support to stick with my goals. I realized today that my covid weight gain is up to about 7 to 10 lbs, plus 10-13 lbs I wished I could lose before that.

I'm thankful I've never been one to put on weight too easily. But I'm almost 50 and I have wanted to loose a few pounds almost my whole life. I've had a habit to overeat to deal with feelings, especially loneliness, since I was a child. For example, it's unusual for me to go a day without eating sweets, and pretty unusual to stick to only one serving. Eating half a box of cookies, candy, chips, crackers, etc several times a week is pretty normal.

Every once in a while, I either have something going on in my life that distracts me from eating so I loose a little, or I manage to lose 5 pounds by watching calories.

Now I'm hoping to do a kind of combination of intuitive eating/paying attention to emotional eating triggers and calorie estimating to see what I can to do loose at least a few pounds. I'm pretty knowledgeable about nutrition content of foods, and I normally have a decent amount of healthy food around. I'm hoping I can do this without a ton of planning menus and careful calorie counting, which I find I can spend so much time on that I couldn't possibly stick with it if I want to do anything else in my life.

Today I ate
whole wheat soft bagel 230
halibut 80
rice 130
asparagus 20
1/2 avocado ~200?
1-2T plain popcorn ~100?
chocolate 210
=970
I haven't really eaten dinner due to stomachache. Eating this few calories is very unusual so I'm okay with it.
 

LaMaria

Well-known member
Welcome to the forum, Dandelioness, I love your username! For me this forum's been great for accountability. Not saying I never go off track for a while but knowing people here want to know how I'm really doing means I have to come clean within a few days at the most so I can't stray too far.
Sounds like your normal food would keep you slim if you could only quarter the amount of sweets you're eating: that's a great place to start from. Finding new ways to relax and soothe yourself isn't easy but it's doable. Best of luck!
 

Cate

Support crew
Hi, Dandelioness & welcome to the forum. I love your username too!
As LaMa says just cutting down your sweets will probably do the trick. You’re fortunate that you don’t put on weight easily. You’ll probably lose it steadily just by cutting down. I’m glad you found us. It’s a very supportive & kind community.
 

Dandelioness

New member
Thank you LaMaria! Yes, I think you hit the nail on the head about what I probably need to do. The really tricky thing to me about how to soothe and relax is how to do it at moments when I also have some kind of deadline. That's when I do worst with eating. My job isn't high pressure, but I still have projects to finish.

That's encouraging to hear how the forum helps you on accountability :)

Thank you too, Cate. Yes, I think I'm lucky about not putting weight on easily.

Report for today:
I used my exercise machine in the morning, and do a few arm exercises. I exercise an average of 4mi walk or 30min on my exercise machine per day, but a lot of times I slack off on weekdays and do extra on weekends. I'd rather keep up on weekdays, so happy I did today.

Food
bran flakes, skim milk, blueberries 200
salad 40
tuna w low cal mayo 100
yogurt 130
1/2 grapefruit very small 20
pineapple 6 oz 84
potatoes 6 oz 120
butter 40
chicken thigh 200
aparagus 30
wheat crackers 130
chocolate 110
2 T popcorn plain 100
=1304
 

LaMaria

Well-known member
Great work getting some exercise in on a Monday! Off the top of my head some things that might be soothing to some people during work stress: breathing exercises, a cup of tea, getting up and walking for 5 minutes, the promise of a warm bath after work... But I think the main thing is to do whatever works for you not just on stressful days but also and especially on calm days so your brain will associate the ritual with calm, if that makes sense.
 

Dandelioness

New member
Thanks LaMaria! I guess the only one of those things I don't do already is breathing exercises. When I'm stressed about a work project, it doesn't feel like an immediate anxiety type situation, more like ongoing procrastination. I guess somehow in my brain, if I stop to pay attention to what I'm feeling or do breathing exercises, that might take a long time and be a waste of work time, but somehow stopping to get a gazillion snacks and various other ways to procrastinate are acceptable work activities. hehe. At the moment, I don't have deadlines I'm too stressed about, but there are some things that I've been procrastinating on, so maybe I'll see how breathing goes.

Today

bran flakes, skim milk, blueberries 200
salad 40
egg salad w low cal mayo 100
yogurt 130
pineapple 12 oz 170
carrots 35
veg bologna sandwich 200
cereal 200
1/2 avocado 200
chocolate 110

=1385

exercise machine 30 min. Phone says I did 1.2 miles more walking

last night I had trouble sleeping and realized I was hungry, so I ate a bowl of cheerios and fell asleep. I'm okay with the calories I ate yesterday being higher, so that's fine. I'm wondering if I should eat more so the same doesn't happen tonight. I'll see.
 

LaMaria

Well-known member
I guess somehow in my brain, if I stop to pay attention to what I'm feeling or do breathing exercises, that might take a long time and be a waste of work time, but somehow stopping to get a gazillion snacks and various other ways to procrastinate are acceptable work activities.
I know that feeling! Not realistic, but it feels very compelling...
 

Dandelioness

New member
Quick post for today

Food:
bran flakes, skim milk, blueberries 200
salad 40
egg salad w low cal mayo 100
yogurt 130
1/2 avocado 100 (think I overestimated calories on this before- this time i weighed it)
1/2 roll life savers- not sure ~100
3 oz french fries 100
fish ~150
butter ~75
brocoli 40
cupcake ~200
chocolate 110
=1345
 

liza

Well-known member
Hi Dandelioness,
Welcome to the forum :) I hope you find the support you are looking for to get you on track for the healthier life-style you are hoping for.
Now I'm hoping to do a kind of combination of intuitive eating/paying attention to emotional eating triggers and calorie estimating to see what I can to do loose at least a few pounds. I'm pretty knowledgeable about nutrition content of foods, and I normally have a decent amount of healthy food around.

I like that you are using this opportunity to examine your relationship to food. That is great that you have a good base in what food choices are healthy ones.
 

toodamtall

Active member
Thanks LaMaria! I guess the only one of those things I don't do already is breathing exercises. When I'm stressed about a work project, it doesn't feel like an immediate anxiety type situation, more like ongoing procrastination. I guess somehow in my brain, if I stop to pay attention to what I'm feeling or do breathing exercises, that might take a long time and be a waste of work time, but somehow stopping to get a gazillion snacks and various other ways to procrastinate are acceptable work activities. hehe. At the moment, I don't have deadlines I'm too stressed about, but there are some things that I've been procrastinating on, so maybe I'll see how breathing goes.
Hello, welcome. As a fellow procrastinator, I salute you.

Funny how we can come up with all sorts of other things to do?

I'm with LaMaria on the breathing. I also find meditation useful to reset my brain. Its kind of like taking 5 minutes for yourself to sweep out the mental rubble so that you can see the path forward more easily.
 

alligatorob

Respected Member
Hey DD, welcome!

It looks like you are off to a really good start. Starting to regulate what you eat, exercising, and figuring out what your bad eating habits were about is great.

I like your foods, halibut and asparagus are amongst my favorites. I like Cheerios too!

Stick with us, you can do this, and I am looking forward to seeing your progress.
 

Dandelioness

New member
Thanks Alligator, Tall and LaMa! Yes, Tall, I think breathing or meditating would be good. I took a wonderful day off work today and went to the beach, so no chance for procrastination breathing today though!
LaMa, yes, weighing food makes a difference although I think I tend to get a little too obsessive with it sometimes. I can't complain when it turns out something is 100 cal less than I thought though:)

today's food
strawberries ~50
leftover chocolate cereal ~75
bran flakes, skim milk, blueberries 200
veg bologna sandwich 200
carrots 35
cereal bar 70
turkey burger 200
3 oz french fries 120
salad 40
chocolate 110
=1100

last night I couldn't sleep and had Cheerios again. I'm fine with up to at least 1600 calories/day, so I'm fine with the calories that added. It would be good if I could figure out when I need to do that earlier so I would sleep better though. My calories are lower than I expected today, but I'm pretty tired, so maybe I'll be okay.
 

LaMaria

Well-known member
weighing food makes a difference although I think I tend to get a little too obsessive with it sometimes.
I know the feeling. Right now I generally weigh calorie-dense stuff that comes in large packages (like pasta) and estimate the rest. Food looks good but I agree 1100 is very low. If it's an exception I guess it's ok but beware that tiredness may come from too large deficits as well.
 

Cate

Support crew
Taking a day off & going to the beach instead sounds as good as meditation to me. Hope you slept well :)
 

Dandelioness

New member
Cate and Liza, yes the beach was great! I sure wish it wasn't supposed to rain this weekend.

LaMa, yes, that's about the same as me- just weighing and measuring some things that have denser calories, most of the time. I don't bother with most vegetables, although at times I have in the past.

Last night after I posted I decided to have some snacks- 100 cal cheese and a small plum.

Today
bran flakes, skim milk, blueberries 200
yogurt 130
cheerios 100
salad 30
turkey burger 200
fish 80
butter 50
mashed potatoes 110
brocoli 40
2 chicken nuggets 90
choc 330
=1360

My chocolate craving got away from me and I'm still craving it. I'm trying to think of an alternative snack to have now to get the taste out of my mouth.

I'm surprised I've been able to keep my calories down as well as I have been since I started on here. I think it's because there's something that's busier in my life for the moment. Usually it's a struggle to keep it under even 1600. So I don't think this will last, but I'm happy it is for now. I am feeling gross and bloated overall though since I realized I gained the weight I gained.

I tried to think about why I'm procrastinating so much with work projects today, while I was starting to procrastinate on something. No answers but It motivated me to start making a list of things I need to do and when. Sometimes lists help me to get started with things, maybe so I'm not overwhelmed and avoiding for that reason. Sometimes the list items become things to avoid doing though, but I felt like I got some work done at least.
 

LaMaria

Well-known member
I am feeling gross and bloated overall though since I realized I gained the weight I gained.
Isn't it weird how that works? Just knowing the number can change what I see in the mirror!
Lists are definitely a two-edged sword for me: the simple act of making one can help me feel calmer and more accomplished sometimes (probably because than I don't have to hold everything in my head at once) but if there's something really scary on that list I may end up avoiding everything on it!
 

liza

Well-known member
Lists really help me when I'm feeling overwhelmed.
I procrastinate on really weird things though. Things that aren't hard to tackle at all. Don't know why!
 

Dandelioness

New member
Isn't it weird how that works? Just knowing the number can change what I see in the mirror!
Lists are definitely a two-edged sword for me: the simple act of making one can help me feel calmer and more accomplished sometimes (probably because than I don't have to hold everything in my head at once) but if there's something really scary on that list I may end up avoiding everything on it!
haha, same for me
 
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