Curvie Girlie The Diary: Mind Playin' Tricks on Me

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I'm like Cerella, I always go back and read even if I don't always comment on it all. Well geez...as much fun as you have it'd take me all day :X. lol Seriously you're my role model, of what my life COULD be like. Not necessarily all the same things but there's so many classes I'd love to take, like dance classes and self defense. Also so many things I'd love to do. And honestly I know before I get all the weight off I'm going to start doing them cuz I'm sure life can be more fun than this. This isn't cali but there's gotta be SOMETHING to do in Ohio, lol. Anyway your weekend sounds awesome as always :) And that breakfast PZ cooked you sounds yum! I always wanted a guy who could cook but at this point I don't want hubby in the kitchen at all....last time he caught the kitchen on fire :X. But I love him and he has his own awesomeness so I guess I can handle the cooking, lol.
 
Thanks for the love in here!

Sorry, I've been super busy STILL and I was over at Steve's forum today, when I could, and I didn't get a chance to come over here! :angelsad2:

Tuesday night I belly danced with Rebekah and commenced my "trade" relationship--i.e., instead of paying $40 for the month for class, I took everyone's money, made them sign in, made change, and did all this while teacher was starting class. There were TONS of new drop ins, and at the end Rebekah thanked ME for being there and doing it. I'm just stoked I get a break from el dinero! I skipped Yoga to try and make PZ dinner. As I was calling him, he was texting me that he was making dinner for us! He beat me! But I was touched--how sweet SO I asked if he needed anything while I was out, and yeah he needed mineral water (his drink of choice for some reason). While out, I grabbed that and more--I actually bought myself a new scale but that's a different story--however, in the same complex as Trader Joe's (I'm a total slut when it comes to grocery shopping--I have NO store loyalty. I go wherever is convenient since I commute all through the dammed county) there is a rock/mineral/jewelry store. I have bought several items in that place over the years, but rarely. For some reason I went in. For another reason, I purchased a large piece of amethyst that was set in a trippy-designed natural reddish rock. The purple clear spikes were dark royal purple, and the Rock Freak at the counter told me that amethyst is not only healing, but when it's formed in jagged teeth at the top it "breaks up heavy or negative energy in a room or house."

ANYWAY you should see this piece--I'm not "into" rocks so much but it is truly gorgeous, too bad I don't have a camera, I'd show you and you'd understand. So when I showed up at PZ's I said,
"I have a gift for you--a weird one."
He looked very curious and very smiley that I had a present. When he saw it, he was truly appreciative and really liked it--apparently he had two other stones in his room, but puny ones. It seemed like his whole body was smiling, I really think he was touched by the very gesture and the hugs and kisses I got felt extra special . I have no idea if he's used to people giving him gifts out of nowhere, it's kinda a thing I learned from my mom or something. Mom was really thrifty, but out of nowhere she'd just give me or other people gifts randomly, for no apparent reason--I got that habit from her I think.

Dinner was snapper, salad, and artichokes. I added some hummus and tortillas to the mix for my own dish, and busted out the bubbly .

Yesterday I ran for 40 minutes on the beach and it was BEAUTIFUL out!! I skipped all exercise after work and met up with Chris, and helped him remove his late grandmother's items from her house in preparation for his moving in. There is some adversary from his dad, but ultimately the house was willed to Chris and his mom, and she isn't against him moving in, so we had to make our excursion surreptitious. Afterward, he took me out to dinner and I had delicious scallops in a citrus reduction with rice, veggies, and more bubbly!

Today Chris and I are meeting up at the climbing gym to take my belay test (FINALLY! I should have a long time ago, but whenever we go climbing we always end up bouldering) and then I'M GOING TO BELAY CHRIS AS HE CLIMBS UP THE BIG WALL for the first time since before he got sick . Then we're going to go to his house and change the oil of my car, and then I'll most likely head to PZ's to spend the night. Again, no Yoga. Sigh! I just have too much to do this week....

I liked it better when I was waking up early to practice, mediate, and chant. I was happier and more centered. Last night I got caught up with laundry and didn't get to sleep until midnight, and I wake up at 6:45am on weekdays when I'm at my house, and I was STILL late for work due to the traffic.....

can ya tell I probably NEED Yoga?

Anyway, maybe Friday during lunch.....but then there are some errands I have to run, and I also am starting to think about TAXES.....eeesh.

Yeah I'm gonna start tomorrow or in the next couple days, today is Day 25 and dammit, my cycles are usually 26 days Sucks. Needless to say I want a beer or champagne tonight.

As far as my nutrition goes, I'm going to REALLY TRY THIS TIME, to avoid simple sugar :smash:

SIGH!

I'll visit when I can.....I hope everyone is all right! :grouphug:
 
Wow sorry things are so crazy hectic. As I was reading I got this image of you stuck in a trafic jam on the way to work trying to get your yoga in while in the car, with your leg stuck behind your head, lol. I know nothing about yoga but I always picture people bent up like pretzels in positions I could never do. I know there's more to it than that but I'm silly :) Can you tell I was an only child and had to find ways to amuse myself? Hope things get more peaceful and glad you still have time for PZ. Tell him you need a massage cuz you are missing out on your yoga :D
 
douknowjello said:
As I was reading I got this image of you stuck in a trafic jam on the way to work trying to get your yoga in while in the car, with your leg stuck behind your head, lol.
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HAHA! Nice! :hurray: I so would, too--heh heh!

Hi Relly! :waving:

The weekend was pretty decent! I spent Friday and Saturday night with Chris, even though we didn't get any physical work done around the house, he had a run-in with his dad and was bummed out. Chris has OCD pretty bad, in negative ways, so I spent a lot of energy convincing him to treat arguments with his parents like water on a duck's back.

Sunday morning I woke up at 8:30, or so I thought, but it was really 9:30 because I was looking at my digital bedside clock and not my cell phone (and NO ONE talked about the time change) and geared up and went for a slow run along my road(s). I was surprised at how slow I was running--it was cold, I'm out of shape cardiovascular-wise, and also I have been battling ANOTHER cold that hasn't quite manifested, but I've been coughing up phlegm and have a slight lack of energy. Still, I was jogging for 30 minutes although a decent portion of that was spent walking up my steep ass road that the house is on--shit it's like a 25% grade for almost a quarter mile, so it always winds me at the end! Oh yeah and "running" down the road is impossible unless I want to faceplant and roll down--it's a dig-in-heels scuttling kind of action!

Sunday afternoon I took my buddy Nick and his AmStaff pitbull to Big Basin State Park, which is a 25 minute drive from downtown Boulder Creek into the mountains. I'd been there about 4 times before, one of which I brought Sunny with me while Nick was gone for the day (Nick lives near me and commutes to Santa Cruz, but he doesn't have a car and sometimes gets stuck in S.C.). Nick had never been, and it was a good time because he hike/walks as fast as I do, and he read all the educational placards out loud like a schoolteacher (we're both UCSC graduates although he majored in Political Science). When I took PZ and Cindy there, they meandered and we didn't get very far; yesterday Nick, Sunny and I went down the whole of this one trail and saw amazing sights! Huge, thousand year old redwood trees, overturned with gnarly roots and beautiful, emerald green streams. It was like a fuckin' fairy land!

That evening PZ called but I could tell from his voice that he probably was too tired for me to come over, so I offered to wait for another night. I missed him, but I was likewise exhausted and didn't feel like the 45 minute drive to his house--I passed out early and woke up this morning confused because it was so dark (damn time change!).

I'm on my period and bloated--yesterday I ate a bunch of pizza and chocolate like I said I wouldn't. Sigh! However, my cravings are abating and I'll be on track this week . Also, I'm re-working my workout schedule to include more running. My runs, infrequent as they are, are prompting the urge for more running. It's kinda just how that shit works.

Tonight is Yoga 2-3 and belly dancing with Crystal--meaning more gluteal isolations! My ass is actually looking a bit better than it did a month ago, or at least I think so, it's hard to tell. Then again, I put on a few pounds; my ass seems to look better when I'm in the low 140s than when I'm in the high 130s, but my thighs look better in the high 130s, or so it all seems to me. Anyway, I love my body anyway and am definitely happy vacillating around this set point.

A note on "bikini season":

First, you have to understand the weather in Santa Cruz. Indian summer is the best time of year for beach days, and that's usually around October. June, July and August see more foggy days than sunny days, and it can be COLD at weird moments; last year on my birthday August 4th, when Cyndi and I celebrated on the beach all day, it was FREEZING! Anyway, most summers I spend way less time on the beach than anyone here who doesn't live by the ocean would understand--the fact that I WORK during the prime hours makes a difference; the only day I'd really have would be Sunday, and yes I've spent a significant amount of Sundays on the beach. But it's usually pretty cold with the wind. My point is: I don't spend a lot of time in a swimsuit.

WELL this year is different. This year I'm going to several festivals:

May 2nd & 3rd: Boonville beer festival at Anderson Vallery Brewery
June 19th-21st: Sierra Nevada World Music Festival
July 31st-August 2nd: Reggae Rising
First week of September: Burning Man

At all these events, I expect to be scantly clad, or in a bathing suit, topless, or just plain nude, depending.

Therefore I intend to keep in shape, and keep my best body I can by sticking with good habits now. At a buck forty even, I wouldn't feel the least self-conscious about my body, and that weight is doable. The main point is to keep my tone, and especially work those gluteals!!! :cheers2:

I'll be finally able to get through a few diaries today! :party:

See ya around :hug2:
 
I'll try to get a camera by then, B! :)

I thought I could check on you all but I actually have a ton more work :cry:
I hope everyone is all right......
 
Curvie Girlie said:

At all these events, I expect to be scantly clad, or in a bathing suit, topless, or just plain nude, depending.
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You. Are. Awesome. hahahahaha

That is the best thing I have heard yet. I don't know why I find it so awesome. haha I wish I could go to burning man...sigh......

Sounds like you had a great weekend. Don't worry about your cardio, the more you stick with it the more it will come naturally to you. I'm sure you are already building up more and more endurance. Stick with it!

Keep up the great work!
 
Thank you so much! I REALLY need to get to your diary.......:banghead:

I'm losing my popularity--I've been neglecting everybody :eek:

:smilielol5: I am SOOOOO busy at work, OMG! It's great to have a good job and keep busy when "times like these" are going on, I must say!

Yesterday was Yoga 2-3 with Delena, and it felt amazing on my sore calves--I realized that I hadn't done Yoga since last Tuesday! DAMN! Then at 7:30, belly dancing lessons with Crystal. Again with the butt cheek isolation contractions and the walking with--and pelvic tilts and a small choreograph at the end. Crystal is an amazing teacher, and after this course I think I'll be able to be a GOOD beginning dancer. HA! You can tell I never practice--I've been taking lessons since September and I still suckl! :smilielol5: It's about having fun for me, and deepening the mind/body connection. Dancing is a wonderful thing.

Tonight it's belly dancing with Rebekah, then more Yoga. I might have to try to find parking at the climbing gym and take Paige's (my acroyoga teacher) 85 degree Yoga 2-63 Vinyasa class tonight after belly dancing. Sweat it out.

Tomorrow I plan on getting to work early and running during my lunchbreak. My weight was 144 this morning and I'm bleeding like a stuck pig :reddevil: Gross!!! :smash: When the period's over I expect to be 142 or lower, and I'm working on dieting as well. Yesterday I did well despite having some beer at the brewery. This morning I stopped by the Natty Foods store and got organic greens, avocado, Parmesan cheese, apple cider vinegar, tuscan-spiced avocado oil, and home-made croutons for a salad at lunch :Angel_anim:. I need more greens in my life! Oh yeah, and more veggies--I had an apple with breakfast today. I feel the Spring coming on, time to stop with the frozen food and GET FRESH! :party:
 
Sunday I ran for 30 min in the am including panting up the 25% grade of my road at the end, then hiked in the magical mystical fairy land with ancient trees for a few hours; Monday I did and hour and a half of intense Ashtanga Vinyasa level 2-3 Yoga followed by an hour of intense belly dancing lessons. Yesterday I did an hour of belly dancing with my other teacher, and then an hour and a half of 85 degree Vinyasa Yoga level 2-3 with Paige.

My shins and calves are killing me. :cry:

Still can't say no to simple carbs and sugar. This calls for en intervention! At least I'm eating salads and keeping toned.

Last night I spent the night at PZ's and I hadn't seen him since Friday morning or something. It felt SO GOOD to hug and kiss him! This was me--literally: :beating: Cartoon hearts kept bubbling out of my ears and eyes, man, it was ridiculous! Too bad he was sick, though. He was so sweet because he knows that his room is contaminated with dust of mold that gives me respiratory problems, so before I even showed up he had a bed all made and set up with a heater and air filtrater in the living room :). I woke up in the middle of the night hugging him vigorously in my sleep.

This is big, people. I don't do that to just anyone, in fact, I've only cuddled men in my sleep who were my live-in boyfriends and loves of my life. All other men, ya maybe I could stand cuddling them, but I have to really love someone in order to involuntarily maul them in my sleep :rotflmao:.

This morning I told him this revelation, which means a lot to me. It went right out the other ear because he then changed the subject like it was nothing and started to talk about how he can't stand how our mutual friend is all up on his girlfriend Jackie, regardless of the social setting. His mind is still back on the snowboarding trip he went on with them this weekend. I teased him, "that's all you can say, when I profess my deep love for you?" I left for work shortly after that but I think he thinks that he hurt my feelings. I'm actually more miffed than I want to admit, but my solution is to just relax and not expect any equal reciprocity when it comes to expressing feelings--he's the Perfect Man but he's still just a man, I have to give him a break. Besides, if I look at it objectively, I said my piece, I expressed my feelings, he heard me--it doesn't warrant validation, appreciation, or reciprocal proclamations, and once I start expecting things, there goes Paradise. :seeya: I consoled myself with one of Buddha's quotes because That Fat Bastard sure knows what's up!

"Better than a thousand hollow words, is one word that brings peace."

Also, maybe more pertinent to my situation: "He who loves 50 people has 50 woes; he who loves no one has no woes." HAHA! Oh that's rich--I love it! :smilielol5:
 
...hahah.....THE FAT BASTARD...:smilielol5:....YOU ARE SO FUNNY!!!
...hell ya that fattie knew what he was talking about!!!.....:iagree:

....I am SOO GLAD that you aren't "expecting" any proclamation from PZ...cause you are so right.....the minute you "EXPECT" things, then Happiness does disappear. We are only human, and we even let ourselves down from our OWN expectations of ourselves....so OF COURSE, anyone else is going to let us down with OUR expectations OF THEM!!! :biggrinjester:

....I think that's why I'm finally happy now...I stopped expecting things...and I realized that's why it all worked out so perfectly in the beginning...because it's just as simple as little children....PLAY FOR FUN..!!! And I don't know why I seemed to think that with "TIME" I was "ALLOWED" to expect more....

.....I was wrong...the more I expected...the more happiness ELUDED me! :(

....PSH!!! Glad that's OVER!! hahah!!! :biggrinjester:

And that is a big step...MASSIVELY cuddling at night...YOU GRIZZLY!!! LOL!!!;)!!!

...Damn, you have been killing it with the workouts as usual! Hope your legs feel better....I know what you mean about aching right now!!! :svengo:
 
Hey thanks for stopping by, Alta my darling--I was on my way to your place after I said hi to Randy :grouphug:.

After that post, PZ called to apologize, I didn't answer but I emailed him what's up? he then responded "Sorry about calling you at work, I knew you would be busy but I just wanted to say sorry if I was being lame. My only excuse is that I was on zyrtec. It's almost noon and I just woke up and I feel all drugged out"--awww he's so sweet! :beating: I then emailed him my thoughts on it all and he answered "You're such a sweetheart, seriously. I'll miss you." because he's off to Mendo for a few days. What a wonderful boyfriend! Seriously--hey I gotta go check on ya :D
 
I registered for Bay to Breakers today. :hurray: Apparently Alta and Dee are coming to NorCal for it :party: Melissa and I should have a blast!

I'm going to ask PZ if he wants to go--if so, then I'll ask him to get us our own hotel room :biggrinjester:

Trust me, from experience: the best way to start a race morning is with morning sex. Or at least a self-inflicted orgasm.

All together now, girls!! :biggrinjester: :biggrinjester: :biggrinjester:
 
hehehehe you just put a huge smile on my face this morning. i missed reading about your daily activities :D
:D i'm glad things are going really well with PZ even though his lack of immediate reaction :D
 
Hi doll.. :D (yer so funny) :p

Sorry I haven't checked in...(I've been away bc of my dental issues)

Feelin' better now. :)

Have fun sweetie!

Cory's last day is tomorrow and then his Spring Break starts..He's excited and ready..lol..

Miss Ya! :seeya:

Have A Goal Reachin' Thursday!

<3 Stacy
 
Sorry I haven't been around, busy busy busy! I loved your revelation about cuddling, because I'm the same way. One of my old boyfriends used to be so hot in his sleep that I couldn't sleep. There were many nights where I kicked him out of bed. Ewww just thinking of him...gross.

LOVE THE MORNING SEX. Nothing is better than morning sex...alright I thought about it, and still nothing is better than morning sex!

GAHHHHHHH I need a man........
 
Hey everyone!

I been rambling too much over on Steve's forum--it's poppin' off over there, I wish more you you would migrate there--better smilies too!

I got stuck and forgot to visit the wonderful peeps this way--

Lena: You doll :hug2: I miss you!

Stacy: Hey Sexy Mama, what's crackin' down in TX?

Buckeye: Ooooh girl, nah you don't need no man :D But I know the feeling--here I was just randomly writing this:

so the teens of the day are freaking out over the Twilight movie and perspective next movie (not Cheech and Chong ) which I had to wiki, and found out are books, and apparently perpetuate a very dangerous form of female romanticism. I feel sorry for any girl who thinks a hot boy is going to love her and make "it all" be about her, hahahahahahahahahahaha! Oh yeah, oh yeah, and think that that shit will LAST and be SEXY and EXCITING FOREVER!!! Ahahahahahahahaha! Or better yet, thinks there is such a thing as a "soul mate"--Ok OK I gotta stop .

I got somewhere to a page that stated "Pretty White Boy To Return As Indian In 'Twilight' Sequel. Teenage Girls Thrilled; Actual Indians Pissed" which I thought was pretty funny. Then I saw a picture of the actor and thought, wow he's pretty hot. THEN I found out he's 17. And then I found out he IS actually part Native and I checked out some more pictures and then I started to think he looked like one of my cousins (I'm the whitest looking one, besides the little one, Scott--we're N.A.) and I got totally grossed out!

What a weird sensation. Feeling like a perv! But not in a good way.....

My point was that I resent indoctrinating girls into placing too much importance on men in their lives. Mainly because I been there done that and was more miserable than I'd ever been in my little life. Also, I was boy-crazy my whole life and it detracted from building up aspects of my Damn Self that I could have--my fault? Or my culture's fault? Must be a mixture of the two.
 
HEY!!! I'm BACK!!!!!!!!!!! I was gone because of my stupid computer, but I'm back. I love your Twilight theory. hahahaha I completely agree (well not with the pervy part... hahaha). I just think the whole book/movie is completely deluded and non-representational for real life which is FINE BECAUSE IT IS FICTION but I don't like all o these young girls believing that they should experience something like that, because not everyone looks like that actress, and you make your own destiny.

Anyways, IGNORNING ALL OF THAT BLATHER! I'm missing you and hoping everything is going alright!
 
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