Curvie Girlie The Diary: Mind Playin' Tricks on Me

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Sam: Oh I KNOW!!! I love how everyone seems to be on the fringes of frothing at the mouth!

Garn: Sam and I are celibate. We are celebrating ourselves :) Well, actually, we just got tired of playa haters and the Game in general, pimpin' ho-boys and all that. YAWN!
 
Curvie Girlie said:
I KNEW it! :sifone: Although, I must say that lavender shirt is simply divine on you!!!! :beating:
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I wore that shirt like 2 or 3 weekends in a row because all my friends thought so too. Some colors are really awesome, and you never really know if they work for you unless you give them a chance... Thanks for the compliment, it makes me want to wear the shirt again, :)
 
Haha, it's so true! Great with your complexion.

I wear colors that go with mine--red, yellow, orange, brown, black, white, maroon--but BLUE looks so terrible on me it's not even funny. Good because I don't like the color blue except in nature.
 
LOL!!! I like that emoticon--it's COCKY! And I certainly do not smoke much in reality! Bad for my lungs, and when I run even if I've been around smoke I cough up nasty phlegm :ack2:
 
I'm excited and happy to go to Belly Dancing class. I'll try to get a picture in my scandalous outfit--my camera was acting weird but it started working properly again. I LOVE my earrings :drooling:

I thoroughly enjoyed my afternoon snack of hummus, broccoli, and I threw in a small Bacon avocado as well. For whatever reason my brain is full of feel-good natural chemicals and I think it might be the run combined with the good food today. All I need are some greens and whole grains tonight and I'll have a perfectly balanced day, food-wise. Wait....I might need some protein in there, too. Hmmmmm--fish on a salad sounds good.

The running burned 420 calories. The hour of belly dancing will most likely burn about 200, and the hour of yoga should burn about 150. 770 calories worth of exercise is pretty fucking good, IMO. I have eaten 1500 calories so far today. My caloric needs today are most likely 2400-2600 for my age, weight, height and muscle mass and also from the continued burn from all the exercise. If I have a dinner that doesn't exceed 500 calories I can have about a 500 calorie deficit, which is about dandy and seems to be ideal for my body in regards to weight loss. If I have fish on salad all the better in regards to the way my body is going to store/use the energy (in addition to the helpful antioxidants and fatty acids) and I should see a drop in weight on the scale tomorrow. I'd like to see 145.5 lbs (from the 147 this morning) but I won't get too optimistic....
 
Hey, Val. stopping in to see what's up. sounds like a fun night you got planned. Good luck with the dancing tonight.
 
Curvie Girlie said:
I'm excited and happy to go to Belly Dancing class. I'll try to get a picture in my scandalous outfit--my camera was acting weird but it started working properly again. I LOVE my earrings :drooling:

I thoroughly enjoyed my afternoon snack of hummus, broccoli, and I threw in a small Bacon avocado as well. For whatever reason my brain is full of feel-good natural chemicals and I think it might be the run combined with the good food today. All I need are some greens and whole grains tonight and I'll have a perfectly balanced day, food-wise. Wait....I might need some protein in there, too. Hmmmmm--fish on a salad sounds good.

The running burned 420 calories. The hour of belly dancing will most likely burn about 200, and the hour of yoga should burn about 150. 770 calories worth of exercise is pretty fucking good, IMO. I have eaten 1500 calories so far today. My caloric needs today are most likely 2400-2600 for my age, weight, height and muscle mass and also from the continued burn from all the exercise. If I have a dinner that doesn't exceed 500 calories I can have about a 500 calorie deficit, which is about dandy and seems to be ideal for my body in regards to weight loss. If I have fish on salad all the better in regards to the way my body is going to store/use the energy (in addition to the helpful antioxidants and fatty acids) and I should see a drop in weight on the scale tomorrow. I'd like to see 145.5 lbs (from the 147 this morning) but I won't get too optimistic....
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:beating:........I just started using Fitday.com....I love all this caloric talk :smilielol5:....turns me on...LOL!!!....so well, I started using it yesterday....hahah...I WAS LAZY to figure all that caloric stuff out before! ;).....well...not really I kind of knew...but damn those charts really put it into perspective, and motivated me to ACTUALLY do it and ABIDE by it! :iagree:...the accountability on here helps, but those damn Pie graphs getting fatter in each food portion REALLY makes me aware that I need to SLOW MY ROLL with the fatty shit!!! LOL! ;)

.....ooooh.....I feel SO MUCH better knowing that I'm on the right track.....or closer at least...LOL!!! Now if I could just stop being sick dammit....I wanna workout BADDDDDD!!!

....I wanna THIRD EYE myself!!! :smilielol5:
 
Sam you can talk dirty to me any time you want. :D :sifone:

Val sorry that idiot was giving you shit. Glad you took care of it.

I used to love dancing seductively to this song in clubs back in the 90s when I was cool (or at least thought I was.) :D I dedicate it to you, my fav hippie chick. :)
 
Trops said:
Hey, Val. stopping in to see what's up. sounds like a fun night you got planned. Good luck with the dancing tonight.
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I had a lovely time dancing, we used zills (finger cymbals) for the first time (for me) and it's complicated and I need to practice, but I'm excited because it sure looks cool and sounds awesome. I also need to improve my hip shuffle. Shit, belly dancing ain't so easy, but practice makes perfect :D

Alta818 said:
:beating:........I just started using Fitday.com....I love all this caloric talk :smilielol5:....turns me on...LOL!!!

.....ooooh.....I feel SO MUCH better knowing that I'm on the right track.....or closer at least...LOL!!!
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Good for you!!!:hurray: I can't use FitDay, I don't have the patience because I'd have to import a bunch of my foods that are so esoteric that it would take forever :drooling: (Man I love that smilie!) but I do have my own Excel spreadsheet. Hell, I can file transfer it to you on the IM so you can see what it looks like, I'm pretty proud of my damn Excel skills. Excel takes some time to master and it's actually pretty useful to know. Oh, I hope you feel better soon!!!! :grouphug:

bikinibound said:
I used to love dancing seductively to this song in clubs back in the 90s when I was cool (or at least thought I was.)
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That IS pretty cool. I bet you were HOT out there on the dance floor. I think I'm more into dancing funky and energetically although I'm hoping my belly dancing lessons will up the ante on my seductive skills....although I could give two shits about attracting some dudehole (dudehole is a word my buddy invented when hella drunk, once, and me and my homegirls used that word for vagina, man, asshole, and assholish man for a long time!) Currently I'm into THIS: and at the 1:21 mark there is this awesome break, and someone says "Get Funky wit it" and oh man, that's my favorite part. I researched Break Dancing and the New York origins as part of my Senior Thesis, so I have a very keen discernment for musical BREAKS :party:
 
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146.0, down a pound from yesterday :party:

I DO want to be 140 lbs.....very bad, and I was so close....... I lost some of my zen in the past few days, soon I'll be able to be more dispassionate about the weight thing ;) Yeah yeah I'm just kidding!

Last night I had bad balance in yoga, probably because my legs were fucking tired from running and belly dancing, AND my breathing wasn't as controlled as it was last week. I'll work on it.

I was STARVING after class and I had Thais fried rice with tofu and veggies, spicy with chili sauce and Thai basil, and fried banana with coconut ice cream for dessert. It sounds bad, but my stomach seriously needed it. I'm sticking to that story! I was still down a pound this morning and I didn't order any Singha, so there! :p

I woke early and did some yoga but not much of the standing asanas save for a few Surya Namaskara As and Bs. I was trying the primary series from Dandasana to Marichyasana B () I cannot do the Vinyasa out yet (flying from a seated pose to downward dog through the arms) and I hope to eventually master that.

This morning in the car I got excited about the 2009 San Francisco Fetish Ball in March, and decided I want to be an Eastern-Inspired Sex Slave (not the real ones of the day, but you know--fancy costume-wise) I just need a Master. So I have 5 months to come up with a Master and a costume--fun fun fun! Great motivation to maintain my weight/lose more fat!
 
Oh yes, I wrote this in Alta's diary:

I feel like my energy needs some hibernation and revival. And using it/wasting it on someone else is NOT attractive to me at the moment. Compassionate as I am, I need a break from worrying about someone else's feelings, and clingy as I have been in the past (admittedly), I don't want to turn into That Girl who relies on her man for adulation, happiness, well-being, and support that should come from SELF, FIRST. Avoiding messes (say I got involve with a friend of the ex, or a guy with a crazy ex girlfriend, or an ex-boyfriend of a girl friend) is appealing. Spending time on myself to tap into my creative energies and bolster my self up, is appealing. Losing weight and gaining skills and looking fabulous and buying myself gifts and spoiling myself is appealing, too........

My grandma told me something her dad (my great grandpa from Wales) always told her: "Keep your nose clean." What it meant was, if you stay out of trouble, you have no negative consequences to deal with. I feel like most of my life has been spent trying to get away with what I could, while trying to be a decent person as well. It's a tough act, and it's nice to just be mellow and sober and celibate :Angel_anim:
 
Curvie Girlie said:
Oh yes, I wrote this in Alta's diary:

I feel like my energy needs some hibernation and revival. And using it/wasting it on someone else is NOT attractive to me at the moment. Compassionate as I am, I need a break from worrying about someone else's feelings, and clingy as I have been in the past (admittedly), I don't want to turn into That Girl who relies on her man for adulation, happiness, well-being, and support that should come from SELF, FIRST. Avoiding messes (say I got involve with a friend of the ex, or a guy with a crazy ex girlfriend, or an ex-boyfriend of a girl friend) is appealing. Spending time on myself to tap into my creative energies and bolster my self up, is appealing. Losing weight and gaining skills and looking fabulous and buying myself gifts and spoiling myself is appealing, too........

My grandma told me something her dad (my great grandpa from Wales) always told her: "Keep your nose clean." What it meant was, if you stay out of trouble, you have no negative consequences to deal with. I feel like most of my life has been spent trying to get away with what I could, while trying to be a decent person as well. It's a tough act, and it's nice to just be mellow and sober and celibate :Angel_anim:
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I love what Your Grandma says.............."keep your nose clean"....so Short and TO THE POINT & SO WISE might I add....!!! :beating:.....I love it!!!!!
 
I just finished my lunchtime run on the beach. The beach was smooth and the sand was level and packed hard by the water, perfect for running. There was a large female sea lion on the beach and she mad-dogged me when I ran past her--I didn't harass her or anything. Unfortunately she's probably there to die :ack2: but who knows--there is no rocks or any other sea lions nearby.

Anyway, I ran great, and didn't stop--41 minutes to be exact, and I must mention that there are 3 flights of stairs to get back up to the parking lot of that beach, and I pounded up them without slowing much. I pushed myself pretty hard and it actually took me a few minutes to recover. I usually recover fairly quickly. This is the third day in a row where I have gone running, but the best run so far this week.

Lunch was a repeat of yesterday--ravioli and sesame sprouts, but I'm saving my can of coconut juice for another time. I had Greek yogurt and a peach for b-fast, with a hearty snack of rice crackers and La Tur cheese with fig spread, too. Ohhhh so good :drooling:
 
I agree with your thinking that you need to take time and energy to focus on yourself and your own growth (physically, emotionally, and spiritually.) To many young women develop their adult identities while in conjunction to developing a relationship. The two intertwine and become the same. While this seems fine, it means that the identity of the self is dependent on the identity within the relationship. This causes an unbalance in the total.

The way you are doing it, and I think that you really should focus on this, is to develop your self and who you are and how you fit into the world. When that is a solid identity, then any relationship that is formed on this foundation will be solid, but the self will not be dependant.

(But what do I know?)
 
Trops said:
(But what do I know?)
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You know a lot, you got 14 years on me and you probably seen your share of women who became a shell of themselves due to a co-dependentish relationship. Too many chicks find themselves absolutely broken after a relationship ends--pathetically I must say I did. BUT the ending is HAPPY :D I'm happier than ever being by myself and doing fun, interesting, exciting new things and I even have forgotten a lot of shit that bothered me in the past. Uh huh huh, of course, it helps that the ex is not contacting me in anyway, WHEW! I'm 70% confident that if he did, now, I'd deal with it well and right and proper and wouldn't jeopardize who I am or what I've learned. With more time, the percentage will increase.
 
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