Curvie Girlie The Diary: Mind Playin' Tricks on Me

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Margaret: Thank you! :hug2:

attyses said:
Val,

We don't know each other, but I wanted to let you know that your diary entry touched me and I can really relate. I'm a few years older than you and what I have finally learned is that you ALWAYS have to lover yourself first. Concentrate on yourself and what you can do to make yourself a better person on the inside, sweetie. Don't invest all your energy on your ex. It's just not healthy. I know it hurts, but just try to think about all the great things about you. Bottom line is that it's his loss and once you realize that, you'll feel so much better!!

Take care.
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Yes, you're right, and I have. Also, I want to talk to someone, too--professional. Working on that, thank you! :hug2:
 
Hi Valerie

This world is not perfect and everyone makes mistakes. At least both your mistakes and his are out in the open and you are both trying to work through them in a positive way. Some relationships can survive such turmoil and others do not. The fact is that you both have very strong feelings for each other and are both trying your best.

I think that seeking professional advice can only benefit you. We can all benefit from the wisdom of others.

Be proud of the fact that you have gained maturity and not turned to other men for comfort.

Also learn for the future that if ever you do stray or have major issues in the bedroom - there are some things in life that are better to keep to yourself. Friends have a tendency to "spill the beans" and things do get overheard. It is far from ideal - but "least said soonest mended" comes to mind.

I really think that you would be wise to remain in close touch with your friends. You have really benefitted from their friendship in these recent difficult times and no-one ever knows what the future holds.

I am really pleased that the future is looking more positive for you and hope that this positive trend continues.

With all this going on you have done well with your weight and exercise. Not bingeing is good in times of stress. Remember - it is you that imposes the "raw food" concept - so if it is tiring you can give yourself a break any time. You can always come back to it. You are in control.

Take care
Love
Margaret
 
Hey girl, glad things have calmed down with BF. Wasn't that the time when he broke up with you practically? I wouldn't blame this all on you.

Glad to hear you're doing well and staying social. You're such a sweetie :). I missed you.
 
Yes, bluntness is one of my less attractive traits...but it's not going anywhere, and I figured you could handle it!
 
Hey Everybody!

Real quick:

I've been real busy in my life, and I just haven't thought to log on in a while. Been blogging elsewhere, but not about weight!

I miss everyone on here and am SO CURIOUS to see how close everyone is to her/his goal.

Currently hanging around 151--so I'm up a few pounds from being down a few pounds, still keeping off most of the winter weight though!

Exercising like normal--eating similarly, good days, bad binges here and there!

Stress= OK!

Work: 36 hours a week, and my tasting room job starts June 7th--but I have a bunch of events to pour at in May!

Love life: still single, but it's not too bad! Seeing the ex once a week or so, and been macking on cute guys innocently :reddevil:

I'll be back!
 
Good to hear from you Val, I was wondering what happened to you and hoping everything was okay.
 
Hi Valerie

It is good to hear from you. It sounds like things are going ok for you - not brilliantly - but could be worse. It also sounds like you and the ex have found a middle-ground way to be in each others lives whilst the dust settles.

Remember that you always have friends here.

Take care
Love
Margaret
 
Santa Cruz Mountain Wild Fires

Well, at 5:20 am this morning the Summit (top of the mountain ridge that separates Santa Cruz and Santa Clara counties) caught on fire and the strong ass winds fucked it all up.

I work for the same company (wine brokers) but I also work for the wine trucking company in Watsonville (Pajaro to be exact) and when I reached my second job location it was like Armageddon--smoke covering the sun and ashes falling from the sky, smoke choking me but not enough for us to evacuate.

The fire came dangerously close to Corralitos this afternoon--and Mountain People have been evacuating. Corralitos is where the winery where I have my third weekend job, and I still don't know if the winery is OK--I need to listen to the radio or something, this is actually one of the few times where the TV and radio are better than the internet!

3,600 acres they say--BURNED.

Poor woodland creatures! Some people have lost their houses. And dogs :(

The air where I live currently (Soquel) is fine, the wind has blown it all south. I'm actually moving to the Santa Cruz Mountains (much more north of the Summit) on Sunday and Monday, even though it's an hour drive from my work, the rent is FREE and it's a three bedroom house--family friend who only lives there 2 days a week or less, but he's the best person in the world and I can stay there and SHOOT my GUNS! Yay!

I am hovering around 152-150 lbs, and the reason I haven't been posting is because I don't really feel like losing weight. I work out like I always have, and I eat well, but I can't seem to motivate myself towards deficits and I love my body. So.....oh yes and my BMI is 23.8, so WTF? I got skinnny last year, did it do anything for me? Not really. I was able to look good in pictures, but that was about it!

I may try to lose 10 lbs this summer but I'm going to the California Festival of Beers in San Luis Obispo this weekend....with the ex!! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!!!!!!!!!!!



OH YES! Good news: it took me several months, but I am FINALLY happy and feel complete without a boyfriend :) YAY!! I date guys and currently I am seeing a downhill mountain bike racer with a perfect body. Oh yes, he's 22 and very sweet. But it's casual. I see the ex about 3-4 times a month but just because we still have feelings for each other, and it's nice--we only have good things to say and the sex is fabulous. Otherwise, I spend tons of time with friends. And adventures. And I'm going back to Hawaii for a week the end of August to visit my girlfriend!!! On her birthday!!!!!

Ok I should probably check in on some of you....
 
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Hey Val!

Sorry to hear about the wildfires, but glad to see you back again. I missed your previous update.

That's good news on the personal front. It's always good to feel happy with oneself. :)

I wonder if the free rent won't be made up for in the high cost of gas. :p I hope not.

Your trip to Hawaii sounds like a lot of fun. Make sure you pick up some hot surfers, and think of me when you do. :D
 
Nah, I ain't driving a huge truck--so gas DOES suck--it's like $4 a gallon here--but still, I pay almost $700 a month for a ROOM in a house with an anal-ass 49 year old housemate, so....

Thanks for coming on in!
 
Hi Valerie

It is great to see you back here.

I am sorry to hear about those fires. That is such a shame.

Despite the cost of petrol it sounds like the move will work out really well for you.

It is great that you are comfortable with your body - to have that and a healthy BMI as you have is what everyone on this forum strives for. There is nothing saintly in losing weight for the sake of it if you have these two factors already.

It sounds like there are lots of positives happening in your personal life. Any comment which includes the fact that the sex is fabulous has to be a big positive.

The holiday plans for Hawaii sound fun too.

Take care
Love
Margaret
 
Oh YEAH! That new situation sounds great, living in the mountains in a big house for free, versus with some nagging biatch LOL. Well it IS good to see you Valerie. We loved your blog whether or not its about WL, actually we prefer the juicy stuff sometimes haha.

Good for you that you're happy where you're at maintaining. Life is not supposed to be about a diet and counting calories forever. That's a totally ridiculous way to live. At some point you've gotta learn how to maintain by exercising, eating healthy and reasonably and if that means you're a little curvy, well SO BE IT. Certainly tons of guys could care less, especially if we're toned from weights and working out, I think a majority of them like a little meat on the bones..it does feel better to the touch.

As to the ex, there are only a very limited amount of men that we find that type of chemistry with so you may end up with him, or as I suspect, eventually you'll meet someone else with that amount of chemistry. But it aint easy to find and I would be sticking to that hot sex myself if I was in your shoes, while I was looking elsewhere testing the waters haha. You remind me of myself in my 20's and early 30's all the time! Luv ya girlie :).
 
Hey Curvie! Came by to check on you, I thought about you when I saw the smoke coming over the hill from your area. I could smell it all the way here in SJ. It was really strong on the 2nd day. So sad really. I'm glad you were ok. That must have been very scary to go to work on a day like that.

I like that you are doing a raw diet off and on. That's something that I have been researching for a while and want to try. I just need the commitment. I tried it once and only lasted 2 days before I cheated and fell off the wagon. I'm impressed with your experience with it and dedication. I'm sure your body feels great too!!
 
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