Thanks FeelingGooder. I have noticed how much my endurance has been improving with my running and that my clothes are looser. Good feelings.
This morning was my weekly "official" weigh in. I have finally cracked the 240s and weighed in this morning at 248.4 lbs. That means I lost 7.4 lbs over the past week BUT I know the huge number is in part because of the 3.2 lbs I gained on vacation (3/20 - 3/27) and the fact that I did terrible last weekend and ate Wendy's last Monday before my weigh in on Tuesday and only lost 0.2 lbs last week (3/27 - 4/3).
It has been a solid year since I was in the 240s. The next step is getting into the 220s, which I haven't been since 2009. I am down 17.30 lbs since I reached my heighest weigh ever, 265.7 lbs on Valentine's day.
I am the Treasurer for my neighborhood association. We had our first board of directors meeting last night and it was at the secretary's house. She had brownies and I made a comment that I'd bring one home to my wife but I couldn't have any because I'm on a diet. Her husband says, you should do what I did to lose weight. And I said, oh yeah, what was that?. And he said gastric bypass surgery. I was like, wow, you look great, I would have never known you were ever overweight. He was like, yup, I was 270 lbs and I've lost a 100 lbs.
My jaw hit the floor because I was 265 lbs and I never considered that I was "big enough" to have weight loss surgery. And the husband wasn't super short, he was the same height as me, about 6 feet. I just can't believe that I wasted these past four years of my life and that I gained so much weight during that time that I could have qualified for weight loss surgery. It makes me feel disgusted at myself yet it just adds even more fuel to my fire.
I am tracking my weekly weigh-ins in Excel. So today's weigh in was the finish of my 7th week on changing my lifestyle. 7 weeks. I have failed at trying to lose these weight constantly for the past 4 years. When I went from 165 to 180 I was so disgusted but failed to lose it then. And it just got worse and worse. I would try to eat healthy and start to work out again but I was so frustrated with how out of shape I had gotten that I would give up after a couple of days. Plus all of the bad food habits I created, using food to deal with emotions. A tough morning at the office meant I was going to go grab some comfort food at lunch. And as good as it always tasted going down, the second I was down I felt 10x worse. It's funny how you know you are going to feel that way when you are done, yet you convince yourself that you HAVE to eat that Wendy's meal.
When I started this journey in February I just had a different mind set than before. Before it was always, "I hope I stick to it this time". And this time it was more along the lines of failure just isn't an option. I was pissed off that I had wasted four of the prime years of my life. I went from ALWAYS playing basketball to not playing in years. And I've had bumps along the road since I started this journey.......I gained more than I wanted when I went on vacation, I didn't follow my diet at all when my brother visited a few weekends ago and after an awful workout I left the gym early and drove straight to Wendy's. But, I haven't dwelled on any of these setbacks. Instead, I got right back up the next day and moved forward.
I know I have a long ways to go and I know there will be additional hurdles but I know that when I get knocked down that I won't stay down. I know how cheesy it sounds, but I think it portrays the mindset I have developed over these past 7 weeks.
The next big goal I have is to reach the 220s. From the start I thought that once I hit the 220s I will REALLY be able to notice a difference in my body. I'm excited to get to the 230s because it's been about 2 years since I've been at that level. But the 220s has been about 3 years and again, I know I'm REALLY going to be able to see how my body has changed when I hit that mini-goal. I want to reach the 220's by May 15th, 2012. That's about 18 more pounds to go in a month and a half. I know it'll be tough but I'm ready to take my training up to a new level (assuming my knee cooperates with me!).
July 4th, 2012 I will be on the lake.......so I want to be under 200 lbs by the 4th.
These goals are still a ways down the road, but I have to keep looking ahead to stay motivated and remind myself that I am not content with losing 15 lbs or 30 lbs or 45 lbs. I will not be content until I reach my goal of weighing between 165-175 depending on how much muscle I build up.
