.?~{Cheiri's Diary}~?.

Chef and Michelle's contest are starting tomorrow!! Well, really, in about 1 and a half hours. HOLY SHIT. 1.5 hrs until my transformation begins! I'm soooooooooooooooooooooooooo excited.

And I weighed in at like 151 lbs. That's what I get for partying all weekend... a 4 pound weight gain. Oh well, just more to lose and win the challenge!
 
Just wanted to stop by and say hello!

We're about the same age (I'm 16) so we probably have a lot in common, Actually, what caught my attention the most is when you mentioned Bosco sticks, because those are absolutely delicious and kill me during lunch because I HAVE to get them when they're available.

Good luck in the competition!
 
Hey, nice to meet you =)

Ugh, at my school it's the regular cheesesticks that I crave so much! They've gotta be at least 300 calories, probably 500ish, and they aren't even that big.


Stupid crappy yet addicting school lunches ;P But actually, I'm trying to get pretzals for lunch. Or bring something + bottle of water. I dunno.


I hate my scale! I don't know what I weigh! Depending on how I step on, or what tile it's on, or if I just drank a glass of water or something, my weight varies 10 lbs! It's soooo frustrating- not knowing.
 
I messed up my daddy's cake... (it fell apart) but we still ate it. It was yummy. And I managed to stay in my calories, I think. Only I didn't exercise again today. Oh goodness...
 
Haha, they actually only have 250 calories each. I know what you mean, school lunches mess me up, too. Sometimes I just have some juice and a cookie (not healthy, but lower in calories) except that doesn't hold be over through track and the gym ):

Good job staying within your calories with the cake!
 
we weight the same and want to lose the same!
those 150 look awful I know :s but good luck hun! we are together in this.
also this diary is very, very cute.
 
deannaaaxx3 Hahaha, the cheesesticks or bosco sticks? That's not too bad, I guess... I still need to train myself to stick with pretzals xP

Amiba Oh, that's so awesome! I've been looking for someone with similar stats =) Maybe we could chat sometime? And thanks for calling my diary cute. I'd love to talk to you sometime!

Ugh, drama. I want to be Harley Quinn for Halloween if I am able to lose weight. No way am I going to ruin Harley's image by dressing up as her while I'm not in shape. Ugh.

For those of you who don't know who Harley is, I've attached a picture of her.

But anyway, Harley has an oversized mallet and revolver, and I was speculating outloud today how to make these items. My parents don't think I'm seriously going to be HQ (I'd have to sew my own costume from scratch); they believe it's just a phase or something. And my mom is NOT a crafty, patient person. She's a lets-buy-it-and-get-it-done-with-cheaply type, while I'm a oooh-look-at-that-I-could-totally-make-that person.

Anyways... So my mom, trying to be nice, took me to Wal-Mart to try and find stuff to make a mallet. I knew I wasn't going to find anything, and we didn't, just a lot of little stuff we could use to make it. My mom then went on a whole big thing about how realistically I'd just have the mallet sitting around and she doesn't want to spend 60$ for it and such, and then when I said, "Alright, that's fine" and moved on, she kept going back to it because I guess she feels that I'm disappointed therfore she's failed me. It makes me upset when she's upset, but I wasn't upset in the first place, she just doesn't know I really want to seriously lose weight (she struggles herself) and that I'm wanting to go through with it.... and ugh. I don't want to see her upset, but she just won't drop it. Oh well... it'll work itself out if I shut up for a while.
 
HQ is cute! It looks really difficult to make though! Making the mallet is fine and good motivation to get slim for your Halloween costume but don't get stressed over it, ykwim?
 
Aww, I know, isn't she just adorable? I attached some more images of other people's costumes & cartoon Harley. It's really just tights and a shirt pattern that I coul dmake myself. The hard part is the booties, the neck piece, the wrist ruffles and the hardest of all: the headpiece! I really want to do it, though. I just love Harls! And I'll try not to stress too much <3

http://i43.tinypic.com/20a9jeg.jpg

http://i42.tinypic.com/1z64oo.jpg
 
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I don't feel so good about this week. It was spring break and I was supposed to just relax and exercise more, but... I feel so stressed. Stressed about school, dance, home, and this.... just everything.
 
Cheiri said:
deannaaaxx3

Amiba Oh, that's so awesome! I've been looking for someone with similar stats =) Maybe we could chat sometime? And thanks for calling my diary cute. I'd love to talk to you sometime!
Click to expand...

count on it!
I'd love to, also :D
:grouphug: yay for team work!

and I know what you mean with stress. I feel the same! my ''free'' week was spent thinking over and over all the things I have left for this semester.
you know what is really cute also I noticed we have the same tickers haha!
 
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Yeah, I noticed that too, actually! This ticker is just adorable though, I don't blame you ;)

My AIM is "Deluded Elegance" if you go on there, or I could give you my email or something, though I have like... 700 unread emails (literally!).

I feel GOOD right now. I don't even know why, I had pizza yesterday and haven't worked out today or yesterday, but I walked past a mirror and went "DAMN!" And posed for a good five minutes xD

But Ughhh... sooo much drama is going on right now. My grandparents are staying with us for a week, and wanting to do all this stuff when I get home from school but I have homework and I need time to work out and they don't get that because it's their vacation . . . and my best friend is coming the week after that, and I totally want her to come, but I also have a huge biology project due on the day she leaves, so I'm gonna need to work on that . . . and apparently the friend I'm closest to down here went to a mental hospital and I have no idea if she's out yet or not, and then to top it all off, my favorite uncle (Actually I just call him Uncle, he's the only one I like) has abusive problems now (or at least the start of them) and hurt his girlfriend and now there's that drama plus the stress of end of the year projects and classes starting next year and I'm taking classes online . . . it's just like, I want everything to STOP for a few hours so I can free my mind, but even when I'm trying to sleep it goes over and over in my head . . .

Sorry, I'm being dramatic. I'm okay really, just not used to all of this going on, especially since it feels like whenever my weight/exercise is going well everything else is screwed up.


Oh well.


This is why I want to be a psychiatrist.....
 
aw hun I am sorry to hear of all the drama!
but remember, everything passes.

don't we all wish there existed a big, red PAUSE button for those moments indeed.
and it is ok if you get a little ''dramatic'' I think you are just venting out and it is necessary to let all those feelings out.

I went through a very tough period of my life so I know how you feel.

also try to keep your weight-exercise as apart as you can possibly handle it.
it is something that is yours and only yours! and you should be able to enjoy it.
always find a bit of time for yourself.
hope everything gets better soon!
 
I'm going so downhill...

Weight loss, pfft. More like weight gain.

I'm so sleepy all the time, I don't understand why, I eat properly and even when I do get a good night's rest, I feel sleepy. I couldn't wake up today, after coming home from school and sleeping three hours. Three hours. That's three hours of wasted time. It took me another hour to actually be awake enough to function. I'm getting sleep at night. I hate being so... lazy. Sleepy. Pathetic. Whiney.

My best friend since 3rd grade is in town. She lives up north, I live in Florida, and I haven't seen her in years, though we have still kept in touch. Well, she came here tuesday and today is wednesday and she leaves saturday morning. I have school. I went through a lot of trouble to get everything cleared up to where I can miss tomorrow so I could spend it with her. She's here with her mother and aunt, and apparently both are being quite troublesome and turns out, I won't be able to see her at all. She's right fucking next to me, just minutes away, and I won't be able to see her.

Bummer.

We finally performed in acting class. We sucked. I had a good handle on my lines. Nobody else knew what the hell they were doing. Two people had to be replaced, and the replacements used a script on stage, and they still got it wrong, which confused everyone else and made us look bad. Maybe we are bad. I don't care either way.

Need to exercise. I hate these ads.

A good friend is still having problems after being commited (and released) to a mental hospital a week ago. I think she's deteriorating. And yet another friend is having a CAT scan as we speak to see if she has a tumour in her head. She's only just turned 15, and is so bright, and talented.

Why am I complaining so much? I know there are people much worse off than me. Why? Why do I keep complaining?

My boyfriend is ill. Consequencely, the swine flu is going around now in the US. I pray to god, to budda, to zues, to whoever can help him. I can't lose him. I can't even think about it. But praying is useless. It just gives me false hope.

Too fat to look cute in anything. I don't want to move. I complain about sleeping so much, but at night it's hard to sleep, and that's all I really want to do. I don't want to deal with anything. But that's childish and, yet again, stupid...

That's a good word to describe me.



Stupid.
 
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Feeling Stupid, is far from BEING STUPID. You're not stupid Cheiri. :beating: and I know you know that.

It seems like you have alot on your plate. Do you ever write how you feel out on paper at home? Or have a diary at home too? Do you talk with your parent's about it from time to time with how you're feeling? When your overwhelmed, and maybe could they take over for a bit..?

I know it is difficult, but sometimes looking ahead helps, you know? Not consistently dwelling....

Try not to let everything rest on your shoulders.

I am wondering you said you've got those pilates videos...what about some yoga, working on relaxing and deep breathing techniques, if you fall asleep, hell you fall asleep, practice.

With being tired all the time.., could you talk to your/a Doctor about that? Maybe you're not eating enough...or something along those lines. How many hours a week are you in Ballet?

Anyways if I am completely waaay off.. my apologies.

Lata :beating: :seeya:
 
You already know how much I thank you for your reply, RunningGirl. *hugs*

---------

I just walked away after eating a salad and realizing I was full. AND I chose a salad intead of pepperoni pizza. And pizza is my weak spot. Yay for me!

Grrrrrrrr I got my period Two days ago, still feeling quite bloaty and cranky. I feel bad for the people around me. And my "friend" finally got back from 3 weeks of being suspended from school.

I liked it better when she was gone. Sooo stressful. Plus finals, and summer classes to earn extra credits.... goodness gracious!
 
Mmm, periods...

UHH, so I haven't stopped by in a while, so I thought I would make a pit stop and say "hi". So...hi.

Oh, and my old baseball coach told me something that I think fits here...

"Everybody is stupid. Each in their own way, but everybody is stupid. Those who never feel stupid are arrogant, selfish and egotistical. If you feel stupid, it's just your conscience telling you to slow down a bit and think about what you are doing. Feeling stupid is what keeps us humble and being humble is what makes us gentlemen (or, in your case...gentle...woman?)..."

Don't get down on yourself. GO down on yourself. HAHAHAHA, hmm...I wonder if I can do that...
 
WOOT Good on ya for choosing a salad over a pizza especially since it is right there! I couldn't even do that. :ack2:
 
Thanks for stopping by you guys.

Chef, I do yoga sometimes and it has made me quite flexible... you should give it a try ;)

Mmm, RunningGirl, I wish I could do that every time. I hate how pizza is so tem,pting, but sooo not worth it even though I eat it anyways.
 
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