It never fails. Every Friday, Ginny plans a million different activities over the weekend--everything from giving herself a pedicure to checking out the local craft shop. Yet by 3:00 or 4:00 on Saturday afternoon, she always finds herself alone and totally bored and ends up spending what's left of the weekend overeating.
Ellen has had another phone fight with her mom, over yet another trivial issue. And, as usual, Ellen ends the conversation by slamming down the receiver and heading straight for that carton of almond fudge ice cream stashed in the fridge.
Bob wants very much to lose 45 pounds. He'd also like to meet a nice woman and get married. But right now he believes that no woman could possibly like him looking the way he does. So, even though his doctor put him on a low-fat diet and even though he just bought himself a rowing machine, Bob's going out tonight with his buddies for some pepperoni pizza and three or four beers.
These folks aren't doing anything evil or criminal. But what is criminal is the way they've fallen into the habit of mindlessly doing what they've always done, month after month, year after year and, in the process, blocking any chance of getting and staying slim. Food has become an all-purpose pill to help them through life's ups and downs--the fatigue and the boredom, the loneliness and the anxiety, the anger and even the joy. Half the time, they don't even realize how much or what they're eating!
Sound familiar?
What all of them (and perhaps you?) could use is a hearty dose of behavior modification. If that seems like a scary concept, it isn't, really. All it means is modifying your behavior, making an adjustment in the often-unconscious habits that have kept your weight at its current level. And we can help! Our triple-A program involves three keys to positive behavior change.
Simply being conscious of your behavior is an important first step. Here are some keys to paying attention to the things you eat and do that have an impact on your weight.
Open your eyes to your eating. You can't change your poor habits if you're not even aware of what they are. But, says Dean Ornish, M.D., head of the Preventive Medicine Research Institute in Sausalito, California, "when you learn to eat with awareness, you'll find you won't need the excessive amounts of food that can lead to overweight. Even the tiniest amounts become pleasurable--one teaspoon of a rich, chocolate dessert you really focus on can actually be more satisfying than a whole bowl of something you've mindlessly downed while watching TV. Whether it's a spoonful or a bowlful or a half gallon, at some point you finally have enough, and when you pay attention to what you're eating, that point comes much sooner."
"To change unwanted behavior, you must first observe it," says Laura Stein, author of The Bloomingdale's Eat* Healthy Diet. Stein has taught behavior modification in her EAT (Effective Appetite Training) Healthy workshops in New York City.
Pay special attention to your feelings. If you've ever tried to drown your sorrow in a bag of cookies or a bowl of ravioli, you know that overeating is ultimately an ineffective way to handle unpleasant feelings. "Many people use food as a way to cope with the loneliness and pain they feel--in a way, the fat 'coats' their nerves and numbs the pain," says Dr. Ornish. Yet you know what always happens: As soon as the food's gone, the problems--along with a few additional pounds around your middle--return.
Dr. Ornish has a better solution: meditation. "If you can quiet down your mind," he says, "you can experience a greater sense of inner peace and well-being. Meditation is really the art of paying attention, and when you pay more attention to your eating behaviors, many good things start to happen." Such as losing the urge to overeat and becoming increasingly aware of how what you're eating affects you, for better or worse.
Says Dr. Ornish: "When you really pay attention to how your body is reacting after having a steak or a cheeseburger, you might find that you're feeling sleepy and sluggish, and that your thinking is fuzzy. Once you cut the fat from your diet, though, you'll probably feel so much better right away that the wise food choices will seem obvious to you."
If you're a frequent victim of the oh-my-God-did-I-really-eat-that? syndrome, you might want to tune into your feelings more by giving meditation a whirl. Inexpensive classes are available around the country; check with your local Y or university extension program.
Write on. Another way to start developing your eating awareness is by writing in your journal.
"Write down any unplanned eating and the circumstances under which it occurred," urges Ronette Kolotkin, Ph.D., director of the behavioral program at the Duke University Diet and Fitness Center in Durham, North Carolina, and co-author of The Duke University Medical Center Book of Diet and Fitness. Review your notes so you can start anticipating food triggers and plan smarter ways to deal with them. "Our research at Duke and other research have shown that writing down what you eat is helpful to weight loss," says Dr. Kolotkin.
Hold that thought! Another aspect of awareness means recognizing your impulses--and deliberately not acting on them. "Just because something is in your mind doesn't mean you have to do it," notes Howard Rankin, Ph.D., a psychologist and clinical director at the Hilton Head Health Institute in South Carolina. "It's a powerful notion, that you have the ability to make a decision about how you'll manage an idea. It's impulse control, and eating is a good example of it. Some people always say to themselves, 'When cheesecake is in front of me, it's inevitable that I'll eat it. I want to eat it, I deserve it, and I'll start my diet again tomorrow.' But if you keep thinking that way for five or ten years, you're not likely to lose weight."
So, how do you break the pattern? The answer, again, is through awareness. "You must become very aware--as most people are not--of the long-term consequences of your behavior," says Dr. Rankin. Eat that cheesecake every time the spirit moves you, and it's only a matter of time before your stomach will start to feel like a big, squishy cheesecake. Take your mind off your cravings with some diversionary tactics.
And practice saying no to yourself a bit more often. "At some point, it's critical to get tough with yourself if you want to see results," says registered dietitian Judy E. Marshel, director of Health Resources of Great Neck, New York.
Adjusting Your Attitude
Simply paying better attention is not enough, however. You have to want to make positive changes in your behavior.
Forget about "dieting." Changing your bad eating habits is essential to weight loss and maintenance, to be sure. But, says Dr. Kolotkin, "attitude modification is actually more important than behavior modification."
What does she mean? "Most people develop a diet mentality," says Dr. Kolotkin. "They look at what they're doing as a weight-loss program, but they're missing the big picture--that this is a lifestyle-change program forever. It's not just a matter of doing certain things until you lose weight, but rather examining how the way you live your life contributes to your weight. Take a broad view. Don't think of what you're doing as simply dieting, with the typical all-or-nothing perfectionist attitude, because that usually leads to weight yo-yo-ing. The fact is, you won't be perfect--you will overeat and you won't exercise sometimes. What you need is to develop strategies to pick yourself up, to learn how to forgive yourself and keep going."
Stein stresses a similar principle: to think in terms of changing your diet, not dieting. "There's a big difference between the two," she says. "When you change your diet, you focus on progress, not on perfection, the way people do when they're dieting. And when you think in terms of changing your diet, you can view an eating setback as a learning experience. You'll say, 'Why did I have all that pie at my mother's house? How can I avoid doing that the next time I visit her?' instead of saying, 'I've blown it!'--and maybe compounding the problem by eating some more."
Firm up with affirmations. "We believe what we tell ourselves," says Stein. Therefore, the more positive messages you send to yourself, the more you'll want to do what's needed to slim down. Each day, she suggests, write or say aloud these kinds of affirmations.
Ellen has had another phone fight with her mom, over yet another trivial issue. And, as usual, Ellen ends the conversation by slamming down the receiver and heading straight for that carton of almond fudge ice cream stashed in the fridge.
Bob wants very much to lose 45 pounds. He'd also like to meet a nice woman and get married. But right now he believes that no woman could possibly like him looking the way he does. So, even though his doctor put him on a low-fat diet and even though he just bought himself a rowing machine, Bob's going out tonight with his buddies for some pepperoni pizza and three or four beers.
These folks aren't doing anything evil or criminal. But what is criminal is the way they've fallen into the habit of mindlessly doing what they've always done, month after month, year after year and, in the process, blocking any chance of getting and staying slim. Food has become an all-purpose pill to help them through life's ups and downs--the fatigue and the boredom, the loneliness and the anxiety, the anger and even the joy. Half the time, they don't even realize how much or what they're eating!
Sound familiar?
What all of them (and perhaps you?) could use is a hearty dose of behavior modification. If that seems like a scary concept, it isn't, really. All it means is modifying your behavior, making an adjustment in the often-unconscious habits that have kept your weight at its current level. And we can help! Our triple-A program involves three keys to positive behavior change.
- Awareness
- Attitude
- Action
Simply being conscious of your behavior is an important first step. Here are some keys to paying attention to the things you eat and do that have an impact on your weight.
Open your eyes to your eating. You can't change your poor habits if you're not even aware of what they are. But, says Dean Ornish, M.D., head of the Preventive Medicine Research Institute in Sausalito, California, "when you learn to eat with awareness, you'll find you won't need the excessive amounts of food that can lead to overweight. Even the tiniest amounts become pleasurable--one teaspoon of a rich, chocolate dessert you really focus on can actually be more satisfying than a whole bowl of something you've mindlessly downed while watching TV. Whether it's a spoonful or a bowlful or a half gallon, at some point you finally have enough, and when you pay attention to what you're eating, that point comes much sooner."
"To change unwanted behavior, you must first observe it," says Laura Stein, author of The Bloomingdale's Eat* Healthy Diet. Stein has taught behavior modification in her EAT (Effective Appetite Training) Healthy workshops in New York City.
Pay special attention to your feelings. If you've ever tried to drown your sorrow in a bag of cookies or a bowl of ravioli, you know that overeating is ultimately an ineffective way to handle unpleasant feelings. "Many people use food as a way to cope with the loneliness and pain they feel--in a way, the fat 'coats' their nerves and numbs the pain," says Dr. Ornish. Yet you know what always happens: As soon as the food's gone, the problems--along with a few additional pounds around your middle--return.
Dr. Ornish has a better solution: meditation. "If you can quiet down your mind," he says, "you can experience a greater sense of inner peace and well-being. Meditation is really the art of paying attention, and when you pay more attention to your eating behaviors, many good things start to happen." Such as losing the urge to overeat and becoming increasingly aware of how what you're eating affects you, for better or worse.
Says Dr. Ornish: "When you really pay attention to how your body is reacting after having a steak or a cheeseburger, you might find that you're feeling sleepy and sluggish, and that your thinking is fuzzy. Once you cut the fat from your diet, though, you'll probably feel so much better right away that the wise food choices will seem obvious to you."
If you're a frequent victim of the oh-my-God-did-I-really-eat-that? syndrome, you might want to tune into your feelings more by giving meditation a whirl. Inexpensive classes are available around the country; check with your local Y or university extension program.
Write on. Another way to start developing your eating awareness is by writing in your journal.
"Write down any unplanned eating and the circumstances under which it occurred," urges Ronette Kolotkin, Ph.D., director of the behavioral program at the Duke University Diet and Fitness Center in Durham, North Carolina, and co-author of The Duke University Medical Center Book of Diet and Fitness. Review your notes so you can start anticipating food triggers and plan smarter ways to deal with them. "Our research at Duke and other research have shown that writing down what you eat is helpful to weight loss," says Dr. Kolotkin.
Hold that thought! Another aspect of awareness means recognizing your impulses--and deliberately not acting on them. "Just because something is in your mind doesn't mean you have to do it," notes Howard Rankin, Ph.D., a psychologist and clinical director at the Hilton Head Health Institute in South Carolina. "It's a powerful notion, that you have the ability to make a decision about how you'll manage an idea. It's impulse control, and eating is a good example of it. Some people always say to themselves, 'When cheesecake is in front of me, it's inevitable that I'll eat it. I want to eat it, I deserve it, and I'll start my diet again tomorrow.' But if you keep thinking that way for five or ten years, you're not likely to lose weight."
So, how do you break the pattern? The answer, again, is through awareness. "You must become very aware--as most people are not--of the long-term consequences of your behavior," says Dr. Rankin. Eat that cheesecake every time the spirit moves you, and it's only a matter of time before your stomach will start to feel like a big, squishy cheesecake. Take your mind off your cravings with some diversionary tactics.
And practice saying no to yourself a bit more often. "At some point, it's critical to get tough with yourself if you want to see results," says registered dietitian Judy E. Marshel, director of Health Resources of Great Neck, New York.
Adjusting Your Attitude
Simply paying better attention is not enough, however. You have to want to make positive changes in your behavior.
Forget about "dieting." Changing your bad eating habits is essential to weight loss and maintenance, to be sure. But, says Dr. Kolotkin, "attitude modification is actually more important than behavior modification."
What does she mean? "Most people develop a diet mentality," says Dr. Kolotkin. "They look at what they're doing as a weight-loss program, but they're missing the big picture--that this is a lifestyle-change program forever. It's not just a matter of doing certain things until you lose weight, but rather examining how the way you live your life contributes to your weight. Take a broad view. Don't think of what you're doing as simply dieting, with the typical all-or-nothing perfectionist attitude, because that usually leads to weight yo-yo-ing. The fact is, you won't be perfect--you will overeat and you won't exercise sometimes. What you need is to develop strategies to pick yourself up, to learn how to forgive yourself and keep going."
Stein stresses a similar principle: to think in terms of changing your diet, not dieting. "There's a big difference between the two," she says. "When you change your diet, you focus on progress, not on perfection, the way people do when they're dieting. And when you think in terms of changing your diet, you can view an eating setback as a learning experience. You'll say, 'Why did I have all that pie at my mother's house? How can I avoid doing that the next time I visit her?' instead of saying, 'I've blown it!'--and maybe compounding the problem by eating some more."
Firm up with affirmations. "We believe what we tell ourselves," says Stein. Therefore, the more positive messages you send to yourself, the more you'll want to do what's needed to slim down. Each day, she suggests, write or say aloud these kinds of affirmations.
- I'm losing weight now.
- I'm enjoying how I'm feeling now.
- I love the food that makes me thin.
- I love the feeling of making progress.
- Losing weight is effortless.
- I'm making things easy for myself now.
- My body is getting stronger, slimmer and healthier every day.
