Are your parents fat?

xxmanduh

xxmanduh

New member
I see a lot of fat parents with fat children... and then I see fat parents with skinny children... but I rarely see skinny parents with fat children?

My parents were pretty average when they were together - then they got divorced & my mom got fat... my dad actually lost even more weight... making him 5'8 and 130lbs.

However, my mom has since lost all her weight (doing the atkins diet & getting a new job where she actually has to MOVE lol) and maintains 140 pounds (she's 5'5).

We used to eat pretty healthy-wholesome meals when they were together but after the divorce my sister and I just ate what we wanted and when we wanted it? Family dinners became obscure and McDonalds became a staple. It was fast - my mom was busy and hey sometimes it really is cheaper! I mean a bag of chips for 1.49 or a pack of chicken breasts plus veggies could equal well over 20 dollars.

Do you feel your parents short changed you? I sometimes feel my mom could have done a better job with the way we ate, she could have said "go put those chips up" or "why dont we go for a walk?" but her parents never did that to her -

do you think that these types of things have to be instilled from childhood??


Just making a little conversation so I can get a better psuedo-psychological view of why we're fat.
 
My mom is overweight, not sure about my dad, don't think so though.

My mom raised me, my brother and my sister alone so it was hard for her. There were a lot of times where she'd work late and we'd just find something for ourselves (crappy food), or she'd just bring home fast food as opposed to cooking. I've been overweight since I was very young. My step dad came in when I was 11 or 12 and we remained overweight for a few years after that, then we started eating healthier.

Everyone lost weight, then everyone gained it back a year or two later. I went from about 190lbs to 140, and then five years later I hit 300.

I wouldn't have the heart to try to blame my mother for my weight issues. If it weren't for her I wouldn't be the person I am today. Even when I was at my worst I loved myself, and now at my best I'm just proud of myself and love myself more. Parents have a lot on their plate, and sometimes I think it can be hard to see that your kid is overweight. It's part their responsibility to help them but I think it's also partly the kids responsibility to recognize what is and isn't healthy.

The only thing I regret from my childhood: no adults ever telling me I was fat. Sure, kids teased me, but they were just bullies or whatever. Every time I went to the doctor or saw family they would just go "wow you've grown a lot!" or "look how big you are!" I sincerely wish that one time someone would have just said, "look, you can't do this, you're fat and this needs to change."
 
my mom was overweight when i was younger then she lost weight as i got older. my dad has never relly been fat but i think his juvenile diabeties affects that. I mostly remember having normal meals. or at least what i would consider normal 3 course meal type suppers and such. nowe that i think back the portions were probably way too big which would explain why i have trouble with portion control. to me a regular fist sized portion just seems way too small... she also used to PACK the house with jusnk, twinkies and such... literally, she would stuff the deepfreezer with pastries... chips, pop, cakes, lunch snacks like dunkeroos and stuff... its kind of sickening to look back at it... im actually suprised im not worse off than i am :S... the reason my mom was never fat... she was working all the time and never ate any of it... and it was kind of like no i wont eat that crap, i dont want to be fat... but here you go...

conkel said:
The only thing I regret from my childhood: no adults ever telling me I was fat. Sure, kids teased me, but they were just bullies or whatever. Every time I went to the doctor or saw family they would just go "wow you've grown a lot!" or "look how big you are!" I sincerely wish that one time someone would have just said, "look, you can't do this, you're fat and this needs to change."
Click to expand...

I was told I was fat by adults. mostly my grandmother, but no one ever did anything to help me. Mostly they were just being mean I think, or at least thats how I felt. But even today when i go to the doctor she never brings my weight up. I've never been a doctor person i usually tend to want to sort stuff out on my own so i never brought it up either even though i've thought about it... I just figure since im obviously overweight and shes supposed to be worried about my health in general health that might be something to address during a physical or something if i don't.
 
Mom = thin. Dad = bigger build, but not actually fat.

When I was like 10 my mother got a different job and eventually the junk food made its way into the house a lot easier. By high school the freezer always had junk in it because it was fast and easy for us to do.

Nobody ever mentioned my weight to me either. Sometimes I'll go to ask my mom if a pair of pants or a shirt I have on looks okay on me and then I'll take the question back. I think I lack trust with her opinions now. At my heaviest, she never said a word to me about it. She would basically tell me I looked good just to not hurt my feelings. I wish I had that person in my life that could be that honest with me, even when it made me feel like crap.

And my doctor never said a word to me about it. It's as if people don't want to offend anyone anymore. When it comes to health I'd rather them say something that felt like a slap in the face rather than nothing at all.
 
I can understand the whole not wanting to blame your mother for it... but I mean at the time me and my sister were 9 and 7... she was hardly ever home so we had to just stay inside and we ate whatever we wanted.

She wasn't a huge soda buyer so I'm not overly addicted to those - I like them once in a while but I can definitely live without them...

I guess with my mom not being around so much I learned to lean on food for emotional "support"

and then, too, being inside all the time I was bored - so I ate because of it.

Now that food is such a big part of life I'm finding it difficult to make the "healthy" decisions whilst being out and about.

Meeting friends for dinner - going out to dinner with my boyfriend, etc.

I think if my mother had taken a healthier approach to eating I wouldn't be in the shape I am now.

I'm kind of a homebody - I don't like to go out and party or just go hang out at people's houses. I think it's because I learned to love just being at home since I was never allowed to go do anything.

A lady I work with's daughter is a cheerleader and has been since she was 5 (she's 13 now) she doesn't really allow tons of junk food and her being a cheerleader has taught her the benefits of exercise. Those things being instilled at a young age surely has to help?
 
I definitely think parents play a large role in educating their children and setting an example of healthy eating and exercise. It is also their responsibility to provide meals which give growing bodies what they need to thrive and reach their potential.

I see no difference in the parent that can't be bothered helping with homework to the parent who can't be bothered making an adequate meal. Children need guidance in many areas and health should always be a priority. After all, how are they going to succeed at anything if eventually they develop all sorts of medical issues because of the lack of a good diet.

There actually are no excuses, well not unless you are living in a third world country and you don't even have food.

My parents provided adequate meals.

However, I take it a step further. I provide my family and educate them about why we do and don't eat everything. Including growing alot of our own foods, plants, our own chickens etc. We specifically waited and bought a property that could cater for what we wanted.

I constantly use myself and my husband as an example. I explain clearly to them what will happen if we don't care for our bodies and encourage them to talk to others about it.

I don't care if anyone thinks it is over the top, because my children are going to live long and healthy lives. It is my responsibility as a parent to ensure this. and in this way they will have the opportunity to reach their potential, feel good about themselves and enjoy healthy foods for a lifetime.
 
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I am a firm believer that you learn your "habits" from your parents.
Both my parents were thin. Out of all of my siblings I was the "chubbiest"
My nicname was "Tubbs" lol My brother still calls me "Tubbs" ( I love it) I was probably never overweight by any medical standards.. but in my family if you could pinch an inch.. you were chubby. My Dad used to always grab my arms and tell me.. " look at those arms.. you should have been a boy" lol.. if you ate with gusto at my house.. my Dad would always comment on it. I guess that is why I'm a member here .. at 5'4" and 121 pounds. I might be at a weight most people would consider their goal weight.. but I still her my Dad when I can pinch an inch. On the flip side.. the times in my life when I have been very lean.. he always told me I was too skinny. He was a perfectionest to the extreme..... and those habits are difficult to break. The saying " The apple doesn't fall far from the tree" is so true most of the time.
 
Nope. My mom is lean, and has always encouraged us to eat healthier and often tries to cook healthier too. When we'd go out to eat, she'd get a salad, and I'd get one too (given salads aren't always healthy, but it was a step in the right direction).

I'm Fat. My father was apparently fat (he passed before he was born) and his family had huge weight issues. My sister is also fat, and her family has huge weight issues too.

Ugh.


Edit: I should note that A LOT of my eating was hidden, and even now a lot of it is hidden. I'm ashamed to eat infront of people being this weight.
 
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My dad is. He lost a lot of weight at one point and got really into eating healthier. Then he hurt his back. That ended all that. My mom isn't thin, but you wouldn't call her fat. Both my brothers were thin growing up but have recently put on some weight.
 
My Mom had gained a bunch of weight at one point, but has since taken most of it back off. Dad's always been on the lean to average side.

I think genetics play a part of it too. Looking at Dad's side, most of them are lean. Mom's side is predisposed to obesity. I've seen pictures of a lot of the female relatives I never met. Huge women... calves bigger than my thighs, etc. Even at my heaviest I would have been considered skinny among these people.

Mom's always been a fantastic cook, but back in my childhood, the term 'low fat' really didn't exist. There were always fresh veggies with meals, but the way other things were prepared would have done Paula Deen proud. She's really turned around how she cooks, and its a lot healthier.

Of course growing up I didn't really have a weight problem. I developed the bad habits all on my own when I moved out.
 
Growing up we were pig farmers so my family all had alot of physical activity. I was ALWAYS the cook since I was able to reach the stove. We were a very poor family so we had alot of pork, chilis, stews, mashed potatoes, mac n cheese, hamburger helper...that sort of stuff. Or anything I could make out of the betty crocker cookbook that we had ingridents for. I was pretty famous in my family at age 7 for creating from scratch without a recipe my very own pizza dough, and sauce for homemade pizzas.

When my family got out of farming my parents took different jobs that led to no exercise at all. Dad became the guy that fills those toy machines in wal-mart and mom was a convience store clerk. We all gained weight. My mom and older sister are naturally lean while my lil sis, dad and I pack on the weight easily.

When I was 17 my parents divorced and my dad since I would guess weighs about 300+ now(in the farming days i would say he weighed 185 tops). He talks constantly about wanting to lose weight but I believe his wife and his job as a trucker now enables him. His wife had gastric bypass and has had success with it, yet she feeds her kids(ages 11 and 9) and my dad the worst crap in the world. Her children are now heavier and heavier every time I see them and it breaks my heart. I got teased as teenager and I would hate to see them go through that. I just dont understand how she herself had such weight issues that led her to get surgery and yet shes not passing on her eating habits to her children.(She fixes seperate food free of fats, sugars ect for herself at meal times)
When it comes to my dads job as a trucker though he blames truck stop food for not being healthy. I told him to bring a bag of apples with him, buy salads, wraps, get grilled chicken as meals instead of burgers and fries. He says that eating healthy is too expensive and its always easier for him to grab a few hot dogs than to sit and eat a salad.

My mother on the other hand has always been thin, in the last few years shes gained a little pouch, but I would guess its probably only 10 pounds or so. She now owns her own cleaning company and her boyfriend and her stay very active, they cut wood, go fishing, do alot of house projects that make them move everyday. They also never eat out.

I think what im getting at is the fact that i dont think my parents influenced my weight, yes we'd hit the chinese buffet, or the local fast food joints, but I think it was the fact that we ate the same amount after we stopped doing as much physical activity by farming.
 
My mum's always been average to slim. My dad, over the years, has gotten more and more obese, but I've never lived with him. Most of my family on my dad's side is obese. My mum tried to make me happy by giving me what I wanted in regards to food, as I hated having to visit my dad for holidays.
 
I totally got screwed.
Growing up my mom was a size ZERO!!!! (ugh)
My dad weighs in under 150lbs at about 5'8".
My brother is like skin and bones also.

And then there was me... My Aunt once bought me a t-shirt that said "I'm not Fat, I'm Fluffy"... No complex given there.. lol

But you know.. whatever.
We're all delt our cards.. we play em' and move on. ;)
 
My mom is skinny as can be (like 100 pounds prepregnancies, and then *gasp* 115 after 3 children), my dad was skinny and now is stocky, he is 50 years old and has a BMI of about 26 or so.
My sis and bro are walking talking skeletons. And then there is me. But I was never "huge", i was a bit chubby (BMI of 27 ish), and I think it was partly due to the fact that I am not as active as my siblings and partly because I ate outside of regular mealtimes at home (like a choccy there and a bagel here as a snack between meals).
My parents cook very healthily, but I cook even more so, we didn't eat much fish or just steamed veg a lot, but always had salad and almost never deepfried stuff, we never ever had soda and we rarely ate bread as a side, we would eat sandwiches as a main, but not just bread next to the pasta.

I did get the "you are fat" from my mom from age 14 upwards I think, and from every other member in the family. I was the fat person in the family and everyone had to comment, point it out and even say "I won't eat icecream I don't want to end up like Camy". So I did feel very very very hugely fat for my whole puberty and onwards...
But because I was the smart one my parents never thought it could have affected me when they said those things and in fact I think I have a bit of a broken relationship with my mom because of thsoe things... kinda sad, they were trying their best and I never said anything back then and now it is deeprooted in my brain and I think that is why I never really gave a shit that I was getting even bigger and bigger, because who cares when at 130 pounds they say you are fat anyway.

I am hoping that my issues will resolve while I lose weight and start loving me and my body more and more.
Camy
 
Both my parents are in great shape. They watch what they eat and exercise daily (long walks mostly) My dad does occasionally like to snack.. but he doesn't gain a pound. My two sisters are also in perfect shape but they eat crap and don't exercise. (GRRRR!!)

I was in good shape up until a few years ago. I turned 18 and started eating out with friends more, had a boyfriend who would order food at 2am so I'd do the same. We'd go out to clubs and then eat at 4am.. That's how I gained all the weight. It was because I wasn't home enough I think. I had picked up bad habits that I never had at home.
 
No..Kinda...

My dad is now a retired competitive body builder and still in great shape... Lucky for my mum...He's a bit of a gym-a-holic.

My mum and i however gained weight after trying a new contraception we both stacked on about 25 kg's each and it didnt matter how much exercise or healthy meal options we had it wouldnt budge when i was expecting baby number 2/3 the doctor at the womens health hospital laughed in my face and wished me and my mum luck moving the weight.... This was a contraception they encouraged... ha ha ha.. what a laugh...

Before that i was about 74 kgs, as I had literally just had bub # 1 (pre bub 59kg) and my mum was of a healthy weight range 56-58kg.. she is now 10 kg off her goal weight... I however am now 35kg off mine.. but i am working hard.. my grandparents weren't/ arent obese though my grandma now has diabetes type 2 and my nan (dec) had it too.. so i am trying very hard to loose this weight and keep it off... for my health and my childrens..

Interesting Thread..
Fifty2drop
 
My mom is and was overweight. 5'1, like, 230 lbs. She has 7 brothers and sisters, and they are all fat. Her mom is fat. My dad used to be quite heavy too. After my parents divorced, they both started low-carbing and lost 100lbs collectively (70 for my mom, 30 for my dad). They gained it back pretty quickly though.

So many times I've had my sister and mom say "There's no way you'll be able to be as skinny as you want, you're from our family, you're always going to be fat, it's genetics". I refuse to believe that my body is absolutely UNCHANGEABLE no matter WHAT I do. That's something people say when they don't want to try hard enough.

Just the other day my mom asked "That's great that you've lost weight Sara, how're you doing it?" She sounded disappointed when I told her it was through eating healthy and exercise.

My dad on the other hand is much better at maintaining his weight loss. He really does see it as a lifestyle, and I admire him so much for it.
 
My Mum is obese; my Dad is slightly overweight now but has been a healthy weight most of his life.

I always slightly resented the way we were fed at home. We didn't eat terribly... especially at the weekends when my Dad cooked we had delicious healthy meals but during the week we ate stuff that I didn't really want to eat and in quantities greater than I wanted to consume... I still always finished my plate though because I was taught that was what good girls should do. Despite all that I was actually a pretty skinny teenager but most probably only because I was extremely active. I was doing some kind of sport every day of the week be it hockey, cross country, athletics, gymnastics... I got injured though and was out for two years and then I really started putting on weight. I was never actually overweight for my height but I think possibly it was partly due to fear of turning out like my mum that made me really want to do something about it before it got too out of control.
 
My parents are thin, my siblings are thin too.

I am the heaviest of my family.

I might have a cousin who is heavier. Maybe.
 
Neither my mom or dad were fat. My dad was in construction and in great shape, this has turned around a bit since he's aged and moved on to another career but he still only weights 160 lbs at 5'6" so he is just a little overweight. My mom has been in great shape her whole life. It's funny because my brother and sister were never fat either. I was the only fat one in the family, but that's changed now due to my weight loss lol. I think it's also important to say that I never started getting fat until...well...I don't know exactly when but I can look back on pictures of when I wasn't fat. I think it started more when I went to junior high and started eating a lot of junk.
 
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