"Are you Pregnant?" and other dumb things people say to you

Grrr, I hate it when people think it's OK to be so mean about someone's weight. They don't have to like it, but there's simply no need for mean/hurtful comments.

I was ill several weeks ago with a throat infection - flu-like symptoms and difficulty swallowing. So basically, I was literally in bed for 2 days straight except for going to the bathroom. Feeling so lousy that it took all my energy just to get along the hallway to go to the toilet, and having difficulty swallowing, I basically didn't eat for a few days.
One of the few things I DID manage to do was to update my Facebook status, telling people that I was ill. Anyway, while several of my friends were concerned and asked if I was OK and did I need anything, one particular girl, who is an acquaintance rather than an actual friend, commented that "Awww, that's so bad. But if you can't swallow/eat, then think of it this way - you can save calories and shave off a few pounds! :D"
Errr... thanks. Not.
 
My dad told my mom once that she was at least 20 lbs overweight. At the time she was about 115 and has never been more than 10 lbs OW in her life. He however was OW most of his.
My mother in law tried to give me size 9 panties. Even when I was carring my daughter I could not have worn size 9. It really ticked me off I told my coworker and she was shocked. She assured me I didn't look that size. My but never gets fat. Lol
Also I hate clothed shopping with my mother in law she always finds little ways to point out the sizes. Like "oh your sizes are over there."
I try not to let it bother me because she has a very low self image and I know she is just trying to build herself up. She is the same way when she comes to my house. She likes to point out every little cobweb or speck of dust.
 
one of the things that really bugs me, although it is never an attack on purpose, is when people ask me where i buy my clothes. Obviously, at the plus size store, where you will never shop...it just embarrasses me...but they still continue doing it, being that it is a natural thing to ask.

I remember my 'friend' telling me in grade 8 that she heard some other girls in my class saying that if i lost weight, wore different clothes, got contacts, got a different haircut, and wore makeup that i would be pretty. LMAO...that was 16 years ago and it still gives me a good laugh!
 
I grew up obese my entire life, but I have two things that stick out in my mind. The first is when I get on a plane and I can see people looking at me with that dear in headlights look. The main thing that set me off on my diet journey was my ex wife....she left me about 8 months ago for no real apparent reason and still cant give me a valid reason. However she quickly jumped into another relationship with a guy that oddly enough looks a lot like me, just skinny. That was my final straw.
 
Ironically, I've been called fat when I wasn't, in addition to when I was. On top of that, I got all the lovely *acne* comments. I'll elaborate a little....

In junior high, all the stick chicks (you know, the ones who's knees are wider than their legs? :p) started saying I had a fat ass, taht I was *huge* etc. I was a size 6. I don't consider that huge. They'd all make cow noises on the bus and pretend I took up the whole bus seat.

I remember having hailed a cab, and just as the cabbie was about to stop to pick me up, some size 2 brunette walks out and hails teh cab. It was pouring rain - cab driver slid past me to pick her up instead and splashed me in the process. Nice.

I remember my ex-husband calling me a *fat ugly pig* (yes literally). I was 160 lbs then..... and a size 8/10. It only got worse from there....

The acne has been a constant battle in addition to the weight. Had a woman at a restaurant refuse to have me serve her food because I was obviously *unclean and never showered* - she actually said this to my face, in front of the whole table. Another time, I had a little girl come up to me while I was waitressing and tug on my apron; she had something *important* to tell me. She wanted to give me the name of her doctor so he could cure my chicken pox because he had cured her chicken pox. She meant well but it was all I could do not to bust out into tears.

To everyone who has ever been on the receiving end of a mean comment about weight, acne or whatever, just remember that what doesn't kill you, makes you stronger. All the haters out there need to hurt others to make themselves feel good and eventually, in the end, they will die alone with no friends or family and wonder why.

bluemomma
 
Ah, I've heard it all... ranging from "Got Milk?" called across from their car window into mine as they drove by and "Fat b*tch!* called at me as I walked down the street.

The first time I can remember being singled out because of my weight was when I was in the 8th grade. A friend came up and told me that there was a rumor going around that I was pregnant. At the time, this was an extremely stigmatizing thing and I was devastated... I felt really violated. Then later, when I was a sophmore in high school, a group of girls tossed a magazine about being a new mother at me and said they thought I might need it soon.

I heard someone say once that being fat is like having a built in jerk radar. It's so, so true.
 
After I had my daughter I weighed about 145. I went to my grandpas house with 2 friends of mine. One was much larger than me and one was around 120lbs. My grandpa looks at me and says looks like your getting fat better watch out you don't wanna end up like your grandmother. Then turns to my skinny ffriend and proceeds to tell her how she might want to consider gaining a few pounds. WTF grandpa. I know he wasnt meaning to be mean but really? A few years later I went in for my first check up when I found out I was pregnant with my son.. After weighing and realizing I weighed 188 my doctor thought it would be great to inform me how it looks like im 30lbs more than when I gave birth to my daughter. Well thanks captain obvious I didn't realize, what would I have done without you to point out that I got fat. I know it shouldn't matter what other people say but really sometimes I just sit and cry because im now 230ish and if people thought i was fat at 145 I cant imagine what they think now.
 
I was at church this past Christmas for the Christmas Eve service I go to every year. I'm not particularly religious, but I love this church because I grew up here, got married here and my dad is still really heavily involved with the music. I was talking to a woman I have known for EVER and she was telling me how her daughter (who I used to be friendly with) was pregnant with her second child. She then proceeded to ask how far along I was. I told her quietly that I wasn't pregnant. She didn't hear and continued with her story. Then finishing, she asked when I was due. I told her again that I wasn't pregnant. She replied with the usual "Oh I'm sorry" routine. She then proceeded to talk to me about my dad and how he was "not so good for a while" but that he was looking better, etc.

My dad is (now, thank god) a recovering alcoholic. during the months leading up to the holidays he wasn't recovering. In fact, he was about as far from recovery as one can possibly be.

Needless to say, I won't be saying hello to her this coming Christmas. I mean, really. You ask if I'm pregnant, then you ask about my alcoholic dad. Classy.
 
Reading all these stories really makes me sad and angry. I bet people wouldn't be so mean if they believed in karma; i.e. what you dish out carelessly, you'll get back at some point in the future (or your kids will!) and it's life trying to teach you a lesson about your former ways.

Anyway, I think we need a little cheer. I have a really good friend who is young, pretty and quite trim. A little while ago she had developed the subtlest of pot bellies. I never noticed it and neither, it seemed, did anyone else. She went overseas to visit family and this old lady said to her, "How many months pregnant are you?" So you can get comments like that with the tiniest pot! You don't need to be fat for people to make pregnant comments.

That's the first thing. The other story happened to me. A few years ago an uncle flew to Australia to see me and my family and he hadn't seen me for about 4 years, during which time I'd gained about 10 kg. As we were standing outside the airport waiting for my dad to bring round the car, my uncle turned to me and said jovially, "But you, dear? You've fattened up, eh?" His eyes radiated joy and sincerity, and I suddenly remembered that in his part of the world, putting on weight was a damn good thing, and he was celebrating this fact with me. It was the first time in my life I had been told by someone that I'd put on weight that I actually beemed. :) If only more people in the world thought like that!
 
Shinsplint said:
Reading all these stories really makes me sad and angry. I bet people wouldn't be so mean if they believed in karma; i.e. what you dish out carelessly, you'll get back at some point in the future (or your kids will!) and it's life trying to teach you a lesson about your former ways.

Anyway, I think we need a little cheer. I have a really good friend who is young, pretty and quite trim. A little while ago she had developed the subtlest of pot bellies. I never noticed it and neither, it seemed, did anyone else. She went overseas to visit family and this old lady said to her, "How many months pregnant are you?" So you can get comments like that with the tiniest pot! You don't need to be fat for people to make pregnant comments.

QUOTE]

Its happened to me too- I used to be anorexic, as in BMI 15 and below anorexic. I was at Uni and a BMI 15-16 (somewhere within that) and had a belly even then. Unknown why, it was less then it is now (at a BMI 23) but still not concave. I was constantly asked "are you expecting" and given seats on buses and things.

At the time I was fine with it, my life was happening in other areas, I didn't care what the general public thought and I also knew well that I was underweight and would often just say back to their faces "its not a baby, its just fat" then watch their faces fall as they realised they had called someone who obviously looks anorexic, fat. :smilielol5:

This sort of thing really made my day as a large part of my anorexia was reading magazines and feeling fat and ugly, as if everyone in the world (that I knew anyway) had agreed to this skinny ideal in their minds (even if they were not skinny themselves). Saying at a BMI 15 "no its not a baby its fat" I liked to think made it clear to them that their ideal was so f**ked that even emaciated was not good/thin enough!
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Reading through these has made me so sad!!!! people are so awful :( i have never really had anything as awful as what some of the stories posted on here happen to me, but i have been mortified by even the slightest of comments made to me, so i can relate to how it would make you feel :( *hug*

the one i remember most, and hurts the most.... i was in high school. i have always been slightly chubby, but started working out a lot in high school. i had JUST gone for a run, and was back at my house, all sweaty and probably still out of breath. i was talking to my mom, and at the end of my sentence, without a moment's pause, she patted my belly and said "you're getting quite the gut, eh?" it was like she was not listening to what i was saying, just waiting to be able to throw that in, RIGHT AFTER i went for a run. i was not pleased. still stings to remember
 
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