"Are you Pregnant?" and other dumb things people say to you

[summer123]

Wow- I thought I had it bad, but in my case it seems to be mistakes made for real rather then bitchy comments.

I have a horrible genetic disorder....caused by my mother AND father, its called...The Apple Shape.

I think my sister has it too but I rarely see her. Fact is around my middle will always be out of proporition form everywhere else. To make matters worse I exercise in a bod to escape my doom and have a smaller hip size, yet massive calves (muscle) and bottom. I look very odd and most clothes do not fit me to say the least. My stomach is even stranger and not only has a layer of fat over it, it protudes outwards- always has done, even when I was anorexic with a BMI of 15 (it went when my BMI was 14 and below). So you can imagine it stings alot when I get asked when I am expecting, if I'd like a seat on the train/bus/tube.

What really confuses me though, is the fact that although I spend most of my free time waiting for buses with my earphones in and music blaring (think: big white or black or pink cables depending on which earphones I am using and feet tapping) I will get someone trying to talk to me- coming right up at me in my face and speaking to me, at which moment I am liable to ask them to "wait I can't hear you", take out my earphones and hear them say "I was just asking when you were due/do you know it its a boy or a girl/etc" and I'm left there thinking 'WFT??? I took out my earphones for THIS?' 'Since when do complete strangers walk up to me and even ask these questions of I were expecting (which I am not), it always leaves me slightly shocked, slightly bemused and very very irritated (and low). One of the reasons I wear earphones is to cheep myself up as I feel so bad about the way I look (fat) so when something like this actually comes in at you and gives you little alternative other then to aknowledge the person speaking to you, what do you do? slapping I think would get me into trouble...

 

[happyandhealthy]

I actually had an entire conversation with a shop keeper one day about how I was expecting a boy and he was due in 3 months and I that I was really excited. I just didn't have the energy in me to go through the humiliation of "oh, I'm not pregnant."

So I just played along...and cried later...

 

[Dollylala]

uhmm probably when am i due? and i reply "NOPE just fat." it makes people feel like CRAP lol.

 

[HHackney]

Because of having been asked about being pregnant when I'm just fat I never ask anyone when they are due. Even if you are obviously pregnant (look like a toothpick with an olive on it) I still won't ask.

I once bought a nice (and really expensive) pair of black leather pants. The first time I wore them was around my family. They made comments about how many cows I had to kill to get pants that big. I spent almost $300 on a pair of pants that I ended up giving away out of embarrassment.

 

[treasureBelle]

My friends at uni have started constantly poking fun at my weight since I got back in January. (I'm now on Easter break.) They say they don't mean it and they like me really, but it does get me down.
Out of the 5 of them, 3 of them are constantly mean about it, one is slightly mean but apologises and doesn't take it too far, and the last one is too nice to comment on my weight, even refusing to acknowledge that I've put on weight since last summer - even when I blatantly have (a dress that fitted me last summer no longer fits me now).

The last 2 friends are OK, but the other 3 use it as entertainment fodder so often, it really gets me down. One time, while I wasn't there, they had a hypothetical discussion that if I were to have sex, who would go on top/bottom? One said I'd obviously be on bottom, because I'm so fat that the guy would be squashed. Another said I'd obviously be on top, because a guy would find it like a mountain-climbing expedition. The other commented that I have so many rolls of fat, nothing would happen because a guy wouldn't be able to find the right hole.

Another time, we were in my room, and the conversation came to the fact that I didn't want my window to be able to open wider. (Uni accommodation... the window opens about 3 inches or so outwards. Some students have got round this and managed to increase how far they can open their windows though - don't ask me how, I haven't a clue. ) Anyway, I'm effectively four floors up from the ground, and can be a little clumsy sometimes, so want my window to stay as it is so no-one can fall out of it. My friends commented that this is a good idea in my case, as if I fell out of my window, I'd cause Scotland's first earthquake.

After tying me into a corset to go under a dress for a ball, the friend tying me into it commented in amazement that in that corset, I "actually have a waist", and "almost look like a *person*."

I try not to let it get to me, but it really does get me down when they say things like this ALL THE TIME. I'm fed up of being the fat jolly friend who everyone makes fun of.

 

[mizzie]

Geez, sounds to me like you need different friends. They sound like jerks. Why do you stick with them?

 

[ecky1]

I had an awful experience at a water park. I had one of those rubber rings on to float around the Lazy River. I put it on while my swimsuit was dry and when I tried to take it off the wet swimsuit it got stuck and I couldn't take it off. Everybody around started pointing and laughing and then several people got out cameras and started to take photos and one even had a video camera. I jumped back into the water and went to a quiet spot to prise it off. I have never felt so humiliated in my life and it's ther first time I have ever told anybody that story.

 

[Reee]

OMG, I absolutely hate this. "Are you expecting?" It kills me.
I was working in a bank 4 years ago and I weighed 160lbs (like I do now). And I swear at least 5 people have asked me if I'm pregnant! It was so embarrassing....
Then 2 years ago when I went to another country to visit my relatives with my bf, they actually called my parents behind my back and told them that they think I'm pregnant! I was outraged!!!
Then I met my bf's parents and his mom thought I might be pregnant too. I actually started to doubt myself and took a pregnancy test cuz I had such a tummy.....
It was really stupid.

 

[Saschaa]

I hate to say it but for me it's things like 'Oh you don't look that big'..'You look just fine'. Mostly by Amy.

It is silly cause those sort of comments are just as bad. It makes you forget how bad you might be. I reached 400. I don't care how good Amy thinks I look, that's dangerous!

Same thing for me before i started to loose weight.
Now everytime i see my grandma she says i´m to skinny now and i want to loose 8kg more... >_<

I never gave a damn sh.it about that comments and i will never do^^

 

[misskori]

I have had boys (well, one... but I suspect a few others felt the same and never had the heart to admit it) break up with me and tell me it was because of my weight. I have had MANY people, when angry with me, start pulling out comments about my weight. I have been called everything from fatty, to fat useless "expletive"... my own father has told me that nobody would ever love me unless I lost weight... I had a stranger approach me at the airport while I was waiting on a ride with a friend, and she told me how her friend was once my size, but that she got gastric bypass and now she is super hot, and that I was unhealthy and would also benefit from the surgery... wtf? rude! and yes, I have had well meaning strangers excitedly ask me when I was due. That one's hard, because you know they don't THINK they are being insulting... they THINK they are being friendly. One time it was on old sweet lady and I was so embarrassed, I went along with it and pretended to be pregnant. I have never had a child, nowhere close. It hurts. All of it hurts. And usually, I just blame myself for being so big in the first place. I don't know what people think they will accomplish by saying those kinds of things.. the world is an insensitive place sometimes.

 

[njoyabl]

My friends at uni have started constantly poking fun at my weight since I got back in January. (I'm now on Easter break.) They say they don't mean it and they like me really, but it does get me down.
Out of the 5 of them, 3 of them are constantly mean about it, one is slightly mean but apologises and doesn't take it too far, and the last one is too nice to comment on my weight, even refusing to acknowledge that I've put on weight since last summer - even when I blatantly have (a dress that fitted me last summer no longer fits me now).

The last 2 friends are OK, but the other 3 use it as entertainment fodder so often, it really gets me down. One time, while I wasn't there, they had a hypothetical discussion that if I were to have sex, who would go on top/bottom? One said I'd obviously be on bottom, because I'm so fat that the guy would be squashed. Another said I'd obviously be on top, because a guy would find it like a mountain-climbing expedition. The other commented that I have so many rolls of fat, nothing would happen because a guy wouldn't be able to find the right hole.

Another time, we were in my room, and the conversation came to the fact that I didn't want my window to be able to open wider. (Uni accommodation... the window opens about 3 inches or so outwards. Some students have got round this and managed to increase how far they can open their windows though - don't ask me how, I haven't a clue. ) Anyway, I'm effectively four floors up from the ground, and can be a little clumsy sometimes, so want my window to stay as it is so no-one can fall out of it. My friends commented that this is a good idea in my case, as if I fell out of my window, I'd cause Scotland's first earthquake.

After tying me into a corset to go under a dress for a ball, the friend tying me into it commented in amazement that in that corset, I "actually have a waist", and "almost look like a *person*."

I try not to let it get to me, but it really does get me down when they say things like this ALL THE TIME. I'm fed up of being the fat jolly friend who everyone makes fun of.

Treasurebelle,

After all of these mean inquiries, I must say you truly have a heart of gold, because you are still friends with these people, who clearly do not know how to be friends. Not just with you, anybody. To poke fun at a friend and say the things that they have said, to talk about you like that behind your back; they are some ugly people, and do not deserve your friendship.

I hope that you realise this and will not let these comments throw you off course from your journey. I also hope that you will drop these horrible excuses of friends, and find people who are just as genuine as you are.

 

[LeaJnice]

I have a crap load of stories,but I'll just say a few lol

My grandfather used to weigh me when I would visit him as a kid & then he would then lecture me about how fat I was. I never told my parents that he did that. I should have.

When I was in 4th grade I hit 120lbs. My dr poked my stomach and told me that I needed to go on a diet.

I think the 1st time I was called fat in front of the whole class was in 2nd grade. We were watching pippi longstockings. A kid said "hey she looks just like pippi well if she wasn't so fat"

I was called fat all of the time by people. The two worst times was when once I caught my friends checking my pants size...and two when 3 different people told me that my best friend kept talking bad about me behind my back..about how much weight I've gained. When it's people that you cared about that's the worst.

And they wonder why I struggled with eating disorders my whole life. Well besides that my mom is on a new diet every other week & that she downs diet pills like candy & always has. I pray that I don't pass my body image issues down to my son.

Thank God for therapy lol

 

[shawnnam]

My fiance's dad asked my DF if I was pregnant because I was "packing on the pounds" (I was 120 when we started dating 6 years ago and am now 171 .) and I told my mom and she said "Well, he is dumb because you have been gaining weight for awhile now and you would have already had the baby..." THANKS MOM lol, talk about adding salt to an open wound. On top of that my fiance's family came down from Cali like 2 weeks ago and they remember me being about 130 and I guess all they could talk about when I wasn't there was "How big Shawnna's gotten" WTF, GET OVER IT, IM FAT...., I AM DEALING WITH IT AND DON'T NEED YOU TO TALK ABOUT IT BEHIND MY BACK... THANKS

 

[cheesecake]

After tying me into a corset to go under a dress for a ball, the friend tying me into it commented in amazement that in that corset, I "actually have a waist", and "almost look like a *person*."

I try not to let it get to me, but it really does get me down when they say things like this ALL THE TIME. I'm fed up of being the fat jolly friend who everyone makes fun of.

I would drop these friends if I were you.... Or at least tell them that you don't appreciate them making these kind of jokes, but they'll most likely talk behind your back about how you can't even take a joke... Are they ALWAYS like this?

 

[Rox2]

I had an awful experience at a water park. I had one of those rubber rings on to float around the Lazy River. I put it on while my swimsuit was dry and when I tried to take it off the wet swimsuit it got stuck and I couldn't take it off. Everybody around started pointing and laughing and then several people got out cameras and started to take photos and one even had a video camera. I jumped back into the water and went to a quiet spot to prise it off. I have never felt so humiliated in my life and it's ther first time I have ever told anybody that story.

All these stories are so awful. It is true that too much fat on a body can be unheathly and even unattractive. But why do so many people HATE fat folks so much? It's really scary.

I, too, have a story I've never told anyone: in April 2010, I was in a supermarket to pick up a couple of items. I got into the shortest line, but then realised it was the priority line for the handicaped and pregnant customers. None of the other customers in it looked pregnant or handicapped to me, but you cant always tell, right?
So, I was just going to get in a different line when the cashier called out loudly for me to CUT AHEAD of everyone in the priority line. "Let the pregnant lady through! She's got priority here!"
I started to say "Oh no ..I'll just.." but she interrupted me and insisted "It's ok, you're pregnant. You're supposed to be in this line!"
I just gave up. I'm sure my face must have been red as I marched up to the head of the line.
I got out of the supermarket fast that day!
I was so disgusted with myself.
I thought about it all for a few days. It was time to decide whether to give up or to fight.
And then , like everybody here in this forum, I chose to fight!

I'm am not giving up and nobody is ever going to think I'm pregnant again. I already have four kids and have had enough of the pregnant look. lol!

 

[hanabi]

Goodness, it's so sad to read about the horrible things people say!
I may have never gotten too terribly overweight, but since I started out very tiny, I've gotten a lot of comments over the past few years.
The thing that hurt me the most was the first time I visited home from college my first year, having gained about 50 pounds. When I returned home for the summer a couple weeks later, I found my mom had taken and boxed up all my old clothes to donate. I asked her about it, asked if I could please have them back, and she just said, "Well, you're never going to be able to wear them again." It hurt me so bad. I mean, it was true...but I just hated that she did it behind my back, sorta.
I did get my revenge just a couple months ago, when I came home and rooted through the garage and found a lot of the clothes were still there in the boxes, so I secretly took them all back, since I now CAN fit back into them (well, almost xD ).

 

[douknowjello]

I have been fat my whole life and yes...asked the question "when are you due". Sadly not since highschool since now its completely obvious I'm fat and not pregnant. But as for cruel weight comments....yea I've heard a ton from family, friends and strangers alike. I remember stuff being said to me as far back as I can remember and feeling fat at age 3 and 4....far too early for any child to have that kind of self image programmed into them.

I have too many stories to post them all but a few really hurtful ones...I had a friend who lost alot of weight and I was so proud of her. But it amazed me how mean people were about it, telling her what kind of illegal drugs was she on to do it. And this one guy who was relentless about it turned around in same breathe and said it looked like I found all the weight she lost. Yea...people bitch at you to lose weight but they don't really want you to....they're just as nasty about success. When I lost 80lbs once they were like that....people are mean in general.

I think one of the most hurtful recent incidents was last year I was coming out of Rite Aid with one of the girls I work with. I was dressed very nicely in a skirt and top, and yes I'm very big but people need to mind their own business. This cowardly ass stuck half his body out his car window in order to yell at me as they came through the light and passed by "SHAMU THE WHALE YOU FAT F***inG BITCH". Everyone around turned to look. I came back to work so upset my boss told me to go home for the day.

Difficult part about the last one is thats not he first time I've been yelled at from a car, but it is the worst because it was so hateful. So every time I even think of walking in public, its a fear something like that is going to happen and often it does. You'd think people would be supportive when somebody is tryin to do something about their weight, but no, most are not.

 

[jen_renee]

I think one of the most hurtful recent incidents was last year I was coming out of Rite Aid with one of the girls I work with. I was dressed very nicely in a skirt and top, and yes I'm very big but people need to mind their own business. This cowardly ass stuck half his body out his car window in order to yell at me as they came through the light and passed by "SHAMU THE WHALE YOU FAT F***inG BITCH". Everyone around turned to look. I came back to work so upset my boss told me to go home for the day.

Difficult part about the last one is thats not he first time I've been yelled at from a car, but it is the worst because it was so hateful.

What a f*cking ass!!! People are so rude and hurtful. That makes me sick! Absolutely sick. Stuff like that really pisses me off.....it's totally and completely uncalled for. I've come to the conclusion that most people just suck and should just keep their mouths shut. I'm so sorry you had to go through that.....nobody deserves that...EVER. (((HUGS)))

 

[Kiniko90]

When I was visiting my native place a long time ago, my cousin (who is mentally retarded and likes WWE) came up with the name Rikishi Part 2 for me. Apparently the name was so catchy that by the end of my trip I was being called that by each and every one of my cousins and relatives (none of whom were even remotely mentally impaired).

Every single time I visit my native place, all my (grand) aunts and uncles have to say is "My God you've put on so much weight!" Apparently I'm not deserving of a simple "Hello".

I don't go to my native place anymore.

I am also called a "fat loser" by my brother every time we fight. I try not to take it to heart by telling myself that he's only angry and that he doesn't mean it. But the truth of what he says still hurts. A lot.

I also get stared/laughed/pointed/commented at on the streets.

The list could go on forever, but this is what has hurt me the most.

 

[ecky1]

Your brother and other relatives are the losers for treating someone in that way, especially a family member. I will never understand why people think that the correct way to greet somebody is with a hurtful comment. It makes me so damn angry to hear about this sort of thing happening from people that are supposed to be supportive.
And what the hell is so funny about somebody being overweight.
Hugs.

When I was visiting my native place a long time ago, my cousin (who is mentally retarded and likes WWE) came up with the name for me. Apparently the name was so catchy that by the end of my trip I was being called that by each and every one of my cousins and relatives (none of whom were even remotely mentally impaired).

Every single time I visit my native place, all my (grand) aunts and uncles have to say is "My God you've put on so much weight!" Apparently I'm not deserving of a simple "Hello".

I don't go to my native place anymore.

I am also called a "fat loser" by my brother every time we fight. I try not to take it to heart by telling myself that he's only angry and that he doesn't mean it. But the truth of what he says still hurts. A lot.

I also get stared/laughed/pointed/commented at on the streets.

The list could go on forever, but this is what has hurt me the most.