Anyone else uncomfortable with a male trainer?

kessterr

kessterr

New member
I just signed a membership with a gym last week, and tomorrow I have my complimentary 1st session with a personal trainer. I am interested in going to see what is offered and how that can help. The only problem is that the only person there who does these introductory sessions is male. Don't get me wrong, I love men. I'm just not sure I love a man measuring my fat percentage.
I feel really uncomfortable with the idea of a man weighing me in, going over my BMI, and just discussing my weight in general.

So today I called the gym to reschedule and somehow I got the impression that it was to them a strange request to ask for a female to do this with. I talked to the training director and he said he was the only one who does the intro stuff. Then he started to go over what is involved in the session, like the weigh in, and I said THAT is exactly what I am uncomfortable with. He acted as if no one has ever voiced an opinion about this. He said he would have to get a regulare female trainer and pull her away special to help me.

Now on top of being uncomfortable with the man, I feel bad that I am making this woman leave her other duties just to help me. I just cannot believe I am the only woman who feels this way. What do you guys think about this?

**I posted this in the ON TOPIC section too, I hope that's ok**
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Umh? Aren't you the one paying the gym membership? This is something that is offered in the gym membership so it's not like you are getting a freebie. You should get what you want. Don't let them push you into something that makes you uncomfortable. That's the kind of thing that will push you out of the gym and away from your goals. I say insist on your wants.
 
I actually find myself more uncomfortable with women! :confused: I think it jsut depends on the person.

ETA- your definetly not the only one! I know plenty of people would would only sign up with a woman.
 
Thank for everyone's input. I don't know what I feel this way, I simply do. And for that reason alone I think I should not be made to feel bad about it. There were some things that were off-putting in the conversation I had with this man. Not only did he acts like this was a a strange request, I felt like he gave me too much information that I did not need to be burdened with. He said he was the only one who did the intro sessions because he was salaried, and the other trainers were not... they do not make money doing it. So now on top of everything else, I felt badly that this woman he was going to have to ask to do this special for me was not going to be paid for her time. Does that mean i am going to have to tip her?
He also said in the course of our conversation that "he did not bite....much". That comment made me feel uncomfortable because the tone he said it in was mildly sexual. Am I crazy?

I just feel more at ease with women. Not only in this situation, but others. I see female doctors for just about any problem I may have. It's all a matter of comfort.
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I feel really uncomfortable with the idea of a man weighing me in, going over my BMI, and just discussing my weight in general.
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you do r ealize that there are a lot of men onthis site and you will be doing just that...
 
kessterr said:
<snipped>He said he was the only one who did the intro sessions because he was salaried, and the other trainers were not... they do not make money doing it. So now on top of everything else, I felt badly that this woman he was going to have to ask to do this special for me was not going to be paid for her time. Does that mean i am going to have to tip her?

He also said in the course of our conversation that "he did not bite....much". That comment made me feel uncomfortable because the tone he said it in was mildly sexual. Am I crazy?
<snipped again>
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I just wanted to address these two points. Unless you expect this trainer to work for free, yes you need to tip her. It's your choice to not use the services that are offered free by the gym membership.

Bite much? A sexual overtone? Nah...

I do get a read that you might be attracted to the male trainer and that is why you don't want him knowing your weight and BMI.

Of course I could be totally off base, but that's the impression I get. Something to consider perhaps.....
 
The guy sounds like a jerk, but maybe he didn't intend to. Go get started and try not to worry about it. You have the right to request another employee to help you. They should be catering to you as a customer. I wouldn't tip the woman unless you really like her and she's helpful. If the guy does it, don't let it bother you. (easier said than done, I know) He's just one person. Someone recently told me that you have to love yourself ;) and she's right. Don't let this guy make you feel bad about yourself. You are who you are, no measurements will change that...
:)

(I think I misunderstood. I thought the women working there were employees. If not, yes tip her)
 
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kessterr said:
He also said in the course of our conversation that "he did not bite....much". That comment made me feel uncomfortable because the tone he said it in was mildly sexual. Am I crazy?
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I dont' think your crazy...and yes, IMO, what he said was inappropriate. I also am one to have female everything...dentist, dct, ect.
 
To respond, I have not hired this trainer. It was simply offered to me as a new client. This is something this gym does for every new person who signs up. If I had hired this trainer for multiple sessions I would no doubt expect to pay them.

Also to the person who said I mention all this info on the sight and men see it, I want to say that it is much different to blindly post your stats to people typing online. It is different because you cannot see them, they are not standing right in front of you. Everyone knows the internet affords you some sense of anonymity.

To the person who said you think I am attracted to the male trainer. You are incorrect. I have never even met him. All I know is his name and his voice.
I am mildly offended that you think I am upset by all this because he may be an attractive man. Like I said, I have never met this person. And yeah, if he were good looking that may make me more uncomfortable. Surely I can't be the only woman who would feel that way. Wouldn't some of us if be is say we we forced to see a really hot male gynecologist, or if you men had to see a gorgeous female proctologist?

Wow, instead of getting support for my feelings, I am being made to feel weird about things here too. I'm a little surprised. I thought that had to be others who felt the same as me, I guess not.

(To the few who were supportive, thanks. I really appreciate it.)
 
Sorry you were offended by my response and others. I thought you were asking for input. My bad....
 
kessterr said:
He also said in the course of our conversation that "he did not bite....much". That comment made me feel uncomfortable because the tone he said it in was mildly sexual.
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That's hot.

Hmmm... so, what seems to be the problem? :biggrinjester:

I'm the exact opposite; I love to be touched by men (so long as they are cute). Well, personal trainers do touch ya, right? If so, I need to get one. :drool5:

I think you need to give this guy a chance; he sounds really fun & friendly. It might be a little awkward for you at first, but you will probably get used to him, and start to enjoy having a dude as a trainer. At the very least, he could be eye candy!
 
kessterr said:
To respond, I have not hired this trainer. It was simply offered to me as a new client. This is something this gym does for every new person who signs up. If I had hired this trainer for multiple sessions I would no doubt expect to pay them.

Also to the person who said I mention all this info on the sight and men see it, I want to say that it is much different to blindly post your stats to people typing online. It is different because you cannot see them, they are not standing right in front of you. Everyone knows the internet affords you some sense of anonymity.

To the person who said you think I am attracted to the male trainer. You are incorrect. I have never even met him. All I know is his name and his voice.
I am mildly offended that you think I am upset by all this because he may be an attractive man. Like I said, I have never met this person. And yeah, if he were good looking that may make me more uncomfortable. Surely I can't be the only woman who would feel that way. Wouldn't some of us if be is say we we forced to see a really hot male gynecologist, or if you men had to see a gorgeous female proctologist?

Wow, instead of getting support for my feelings, I am being made to feel weird about things here too. I'm a little surprised. I thought that had to be others who felt the same as me, I guess not.

(To the few who were supportive, thanks. I really appreciate it.)
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I would do the same as you, I would ask for a female there are somethings that you don't want to discuss in front of other men. Some women are more than comfortable talking to men about their weight and some of us are not, that's what makes us all different which is a good job other wise the world would be a very boring place if we were all the same.

As for his comment I think he was probably trying to make light of things and not doing it very well.
Of course you don't have to take the assessment, you can just go to the gym for a while to see how you get on then if you fell any happier you could then do the assessment or you could go and talk to him about your goals you don't have to discuss your BMI or your weight.

Don't feel weird, I have friends who would feel the same but wouldn't have the courage to say so, I say Good on you for saying what you really want.
 
Hi Kesterr,

Congratulations on working towards your goals. I think that the most important thing to remember here is that you are the customer and your comfort with whoever you are working with (and PAYING) is incredibly important aspect in being motivated. It's the same as finding the right job for you or finding the perfect clothes that you feel amazing in. Maybe you are being irrational, but that's not the point - a male gynecologist may be just as (if not more) qualified, but it's personal so you have the right to choose! Look around and see if there is another gym or another trainer in your area that you'll feel more comfortable with.

Also, keep in mind that all personal trainers work with people everyday who are overweight or very unfit. They are used to working with beginners to help people achieve their goals, and without people like us they'd be out of work! Realistically, your personal trainer (male or female) won't care or be phased by your weight, BMI or measurements.

Think about the day when you will have achieved your goal. There will be a time when you will want to brag about and maybe even exaggerate your starting point to show just how much you've accomplished!
 
kessterr said:
or if you men had to see a gorgeous female proctologist?
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Haha, bad question.

At least from my perspective.

Wow, instead of getting support for my feelings, I am being made to feel weird about things here too. I'm a little surprised. I thought that had to be others who felt the same as me, I guess not.
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I'm not trying to make you feel bad, so please don't read into what I'm saying here...

But you opened yourself up for unbiased opinions and perspectives by posting what you did above. You can't do that on the Internet and expect all opinions to be in your favor.

I am assuming you expect this since you are 'surprised' and 'offended.'
 
I understand where your coming from. I'm not sure if I would feel like that with a trainer myself, but I definitely must have a female gynecologist, which some people would think is two completely different things... but I'm uncomfortable with just my husband doing my weighins for me... lol, not to mention another man... I wish you the best of luck with your goals, and hope you can resolve this problem with your gym, or maybe find a new gym?
 
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