Antyoch's diary

Its so hard when the scale isn't reflecting what you've been doing. Last time I was losing weight I'd go up one week and then down heaps the next week. There was a definite pattern. I could never work out why though...

Keep strong and don't give up!
 
Hey guys, thanks :) You guys keep me going, I'd probably be binging on junk right now without everyone here. I wasn't going to face the forum because I still sort of feel like crap, but realized if I can't confide here then I'm just bullshitting myself. I need to be honest. I went and bought some new shoes at aldo, white round toe flats for $20 they have a great sale on now, they had to order them from Kingston though so they wont be here for a bit. I didn't go to the gym because I told my sister I'd take her shoe shopping. Eating went well. The new job is good. I still feel miserable. I'm going to the gym tomorrow! *jumps up and down on her hormones* stupid things. Oh well, we can get through it, and hopefully tomorrow i feel better. Thanks everyone :)
 
Hey anytoch-dont even sweat it girl. you have been eating right and working out regularly so you know its not "real" weight. I can appreciate your frame of mind though-i struggle with the same thing. Its like "if im doing everything right, why is the scale determined to piss me off!?". Try to focus on the fact that you are eating right and working out consistently though, and the scale will eventually catch up with you. Give it time-i bet in a couple of days you'll be back to 209 if not less.

Something does come to mind though-after i do a body pump class (strength training) i find that the scale does go up 2-3 pounds afterwards. I know it cant possibly be muscle because we just cant build muscle that quickly, but i had read somewhere that weight lifting causes muscles to retain water...? Does that sounds right? I may have it wrong or confused with something else, but at any rate, you've got the inches lost as a better indicator of where you are really at. I know how its easier said than done, but just ignore the scale - its so bsing you.

You are on an amazing roll and it sounds like you are doing an admirable job of keeping it up buy overcoming the urge to binge...you should be proud of yourself!!!!

Shoe shopping is always therapeutic - especially when you get a good deal! and good to hear that you seem happy with your new job.

Hormones are a pain-feeling down is shitty enough without having the scale to make things worse, but hang in there. Just a few more days to go. You've been doing so well I know you have it in you to stay strong! I'm cheering for you!
 
Thanks nightrunner :) We all can do it together! Because theres such a great support system here. Its hard to believe anyone could fail that belongs here. Mess up, hit bumps, ruts, really high walls. but fail, no way!

I feel a lot better today! I went to the gym, I think not going to the gym yesterday was a mistake but I promised my sister I'd take her shoe shopping. Was just a day, we move on.

I'm trying to get my eating in line again with this new job. It's tech support/desk job. I'm in training right now. The good thing is the Cafeteria sells salad that you can make yourself, whole wheat sandwiches and skim milk :D But I want to save money so I need to start packing a lunch!

I didn't eat enough today and I know it, I'm gunna scrounge for some healthy calories in a bit. I had:

1/2 cup allbran w/ skim milk
a lunch bag of grapes
chicken caeser wrap (was gross and had fake bacon, will not buy again :\)
1/2c skim milk
Tuna sandwhich with 1 piece of bread whole grain
1/2 cup of cottage cheese
1 cup roasted potatoes. Ate more of those then I should have but I figured I had a few extra calories and mom baked them with a bit of EVOO and they were delicious!
1c unsweetened applesauce
1/4 of a cucumber
[edit] got about 200 calories worth of neapolitan ice cream. Not great I know, but I dont feel guilty for it :p.

annd whatever I find downstairs when I go!

Off to watch true blood and house now!

Hope everyone's doing as good as I feel today :D You are all inspirations and stars!
 
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Its odd when you miss one day of the gym and feel bad about it. I remember missing 1 year! :) I'd hate to ad up all the gym I've paid for and not gone too oooops.

We're getting value for money now :hurray:

I try to make my lunch for work too. Definately save money. It's good to have a healthy back up at the work cafe though.
 
Hi Antyoch,

I hear you re: scale going up. I think i have mentioned it before--out bodies are complex (esp. women's bodies). Don't let the scales tell you what to do. From reading your posts I understand that you are feeling good, people are noticing the changes and that has helped you tremendously. Most importantly, you are doing it the right way. I totally admire your power of resistence and your attitude towards running and exercise (you feel guilty if you havent been running for a day, there are VERY few ppl like that). Stay positive, hun. We are all here if you want to vent. :)

True blood? I have watched bits and pieces of an episode. Thought it was interesting but think it will take me time to get into it. I'm Weeds, Dexter, Six Feet Under kinda gal. :) What do you think about the show?
 
We all can do it together! Because theres such a great support system here. Its hard to believe anyone could fail that belongs here. Mess up, hit bumps, ruts, really high walls. but fail, no way!

Girl you are so right! Just thinking of how many people here have started and maintained a healthy lifestyle is the perfect antidote for dealing with shaky self confidence.

You're so lucky for having healthy choices at your caf. I do everything i can to avoid going to the school caf because the wrong foods are too tempting!

Sounds like your back on track! Keep it up!!!
 
Ahh! I've been so busy lately! Sorry I haven't been here so much!

New job, new friends, new stuff, I haven't been missing the gym though! I lost 5 inches total this week! I dont know how I did it but I did. My weight loss seems to be weird. I hit a low, this week it was 209, then went up to 214 have been steady at 209 for 4 days and now i'm at 205. So for the week I've lost 4 pounds, but it's as if it happens in one day. Strange bodies we have!!

Hope everyone is having a good week :D
 
WHat an awesome loss! You've done so well.

I've just had a couple of days off exercising and i need to get back into it today. Well done for keeping on going to the gym.

Have a good Sunday.
 
Congratulations on the inches lost!!! I am sure you can feel in in your clothes already. Don't trust the scale, trust yourself. So so so so happy for you.:party:

Good luck with the new job!!! Have a good Sunday, sweetie. I am celebrating your inches lost with you today!:party::party:
 
Whaaat!!! 5 inches!? Girl that’s impressive!!!!! Way to go!! sticking to your guns through that rough patch during TOM totally paid off!!! ill remember your experience for next month-im sure it will help me stay focused!
 
Hopefully that link works, ignore the dates. Its what I use to track everything. I got it from the Super Awesome Mega Challenge, its a great tool!

I'm excited for the next week we're all going to do great!!

Went to the gym this morning, swam and did my upper body strength training.

so far today I had allbran with skim milk, grapes, cottage cheese, and tuna w/ whole grain bread.

Hope everyone's Sunday is good!!!
 
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Thanks guys :)

I feel miserable! I completely binged on rice thins and cream cheese. I dont know what's wrong with me, I've had cravings all day, and they were under control until i got into a fight with my parents and I just drove to the store and bought junk!!

Why???? I feel disgusting now and horribly fat and gross. I'm angry I did it. I'm getting back on the horse tomorrow. I wont let this get me down. I can do this. We all fall sometimes. We CAN DO IT!

gah, i'm miserable. Time to sleep it off.
 
Hey antyoch,

Sorry to hear things were a bit difficult for you in the evening after your great day. Just remember that you ate well the rest of the day and you got in some good exercise. Rice crackers and cream cheese don't sound like the worst kind of binging!
Try to have strategy for next time you get upset maybe? ALthough I know for me thats easier to say than do.

Think about all the great days you have had so far on this journey.:grouphug:
 
you are absolutely right! we all fall off, (not that id call yesterday falling off-you got ur workout in!) its what you do after you take a break that really counts. So its a new day which means a new calorie count!

Sorry to hear about your disagreement with ur parents. but like ana said, you didnt binge on anything unhealthy. no empty calories-so be proud of yourself for choosing the right thing to eat when it would have been easier to dig into some ice cream or chips

i know it can be hard to deal with a binge when you've been doing so well, but thats exactly why its okay! since you have been doing everything right for so long, you can afford to have a day or two where you arent too strict with ur food intake-and you've only had an evening! so you're good!

hope you work everything out with ur parents...
 
Thanks :)

I feel better today, you guys are right at least it wasn't completely empty. The cream cheese is non-fat, its just the feeling of losing control like that. I'm up 5 pounds on the scale but I know it's got to be just water weight from all the salt in the cream cheese and crackers, life goes on!

Today is a new day though! And I feel better, went to the gym, have been eating well, all bran for breakfast and a tuna sandwich with cottage cheese for lunch. will have apple sauce for a snack and probably stew for dinner!

thanks everyone :D
 
Thanks guys :)

I feel miserable! I completely binged on rice thins and cream cheese. I dont know what's wrong with me, I've had cravings all day, and they were under control until i got into a fight with my parents and I just drove to the store and bought junk!!

I can never sleep after a fight with my parents...and when things go badly in my life, I can never seem to feel full. I also keep turning to sugary foods to try to get a high, but sometimes I'm so down, I just can't eat enough to quell my emotional discomfort. I don't know what works for you, but I'm trying to take up a new hobby that might help. I've been making collages of fashion magazine images for years, but have decided to learn sewing so that I can try to replicate the fashions without the crippling expense. The classes begin in October. I think it will help to have a hobby I can work on late at night in my bedroom that requires both hands and mental acuity. One of my friends says she has to knit while she watches tv. Hopefully you'll find something that can become your 'niche' too. Until then, trust me, honey, I know how deeply frustrating the parent-child relationship is. On advice from my sister, I can recommend this book: How to be in a relationship like an adult. Which is avail. online from amazon, I think. I never read it, but it gives tips on dealing with difficult relationships. (I'm not suggesting you didnt handle it like an adult). I have a therapist that I ask for advice on how to handle my parents when they get too childlike or disrespectful of my boundaries. Sometimes they think because they made you, there are no boundaries...sadly not true. Hope this helps.
Ash
 
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Antyoch, you are doing so well. Don't let one day get you down. Plus, parents will be parents, there will always be fights. I live very far away from mine, but when I am around them for long they drive me insane as well. My strategy? When they are rambling, I pretend that I am listening but over the years I have really developed this skill of blocking things out completely. I love them to death, but when it gets too much I do block them out. It is perhaps not the best strategy but it has helped me tremendously over the years...

And you are a ROCKSTAR for not letting one day get you down. Way to go!!

Sending my positive energy to you. Take care!
 
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